A NotSoNormal Week 4
by Bluesaber3
Summary: Read the title. Enough said.
1. They're Back

**You all asked for it. Twenty of you voted for it in the poll. One sad, lonely soul voted no. Well, in the sheer disappointment of that sad, sad person, I present to you, drumroll please... A NOT-SO-NORMAL WEEK 4!**

**Please attempt to read the chapter _before_ you die of excitement and happiness.**

**BLUESABER3 IS BACK, AND IN FULL FORCE!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars! :)**

**Additional credit: A couple of the ideas in this chapter were given to me from other sources, including Liv (my wonderful bff/sister) and some old reviewer ideas I dug up from the archive. Thank you all!**

**So now, without further ado, I present to you once again, A Not-So-Normal Week 4!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 1: They're Back**

"Ahsoka. Wake up."

No reply from the sleeping Padawan.

"Ahsokaaaaaaaa."

Still nothing.

"AHSOKA MATILDA TANO, GET OUT OF BED THIS INSTANCE!"

Next thing he knew, there was a pillow flying at top speed straight into his face. "My middle name is NOT Matilda!"

Ahsoka looked to her crazy master, who was flat on his back on the floor with the pillow on top of his face.

"Muhrnin' Snips," Anakin mumbled from under the pillow.

This wasn't actually the typical morning, as usually it was Anakin who slept until he was practically dragged out of bed by one person or another. One time he just fell off the bed and woke himself up.

"Master, just because you're up before me for _once_ doesn't mean you can come and shout in my face," Ahsoka said to him as she slid off the bed. She took the pillow in her hands and smacked him with it again, then proceeded to leave the room.

Anakin tossed the pillow aside and went back to the kitchen, where he was attempting to prepare breakfast.

Ahsoka leaned her elbows on the kitchen counter as she watched him. "Have you decided to cook something _other than _unicorn pancakes and frozen tater tots?"

"For the record," Anakin remarked, stirring something in a pan on the stove, "frozen tater tots are the best invention since sliced bread, and that's not even _counting _all the things you can _do _with the sliced bread." His face broke into a grin.

A slight groan escaped Ahsoka's lips. "Sandwiches again?"

"Why yes, but at the moment, I'm making snail gumbo!" Anakin smiled wider and added something labeled 'powdered jellyfish' into his pan.

"Say what?" Ahsoka peered into the pan. "Snail gumbo?" She leaned back at the smell and put her hands on her hips. "Have you been reading weird internet articles again?"

"Every day!" Anakin added the snails.

Ahsoka's eye twitched. "Are you supposed to add them with the shells on…?"

"Well duh," Anakin replied. "The recipe only said 'one pound snails, shells taken off'. So that means I add five pounds with the shell _on._ See, I don't believe everything I hear on the internet!"

Ahsoka face palmed, and went to the cupboard to get something else for breakfast.

Ever since Obi-Wan and Satine's wedding, things haven't changed much. After the honeymoon, Obi-Wan helped Satine move a lot of her stuff into his quarters in the Jedi Temple, and the two of them now live together.

Mace and Aayla's "date" didn't last long that wedding night. After Mace ordered a corndog for dinner and Aayla accused him of being "one of them," she smacked him in the face with an indoor tree and walked away.

As for Ahsoka and Bob, well, they haven't seen each other much outside of training sessions lately. He still has a love for her in his heart, but he tries his hardest to honor her word that it would "not work between them." And by that I mean he sends her text messages _only _every three days, and gives her flowers during the group Padawan training sessions Yoda had recently planned.

Cad Bane has fallen in love with a lovely woman named Sue. He met her at an intergalactic bank. It happened somewhere along the lines of this…

Cad Bane walked up to the bank counter. "I'm here to rob your money."

Sue was at the counter and looked at him. "SECURITY!"

Then Bane got hearts in his eyes and passed out.

That's how it happened.

Anyway, where was I… oh right. Kit has started a school for intelligent zoo animals, and now owns three giraffes, five sea cucumbers, a handful of colorful parrots, an inchworm, sixty-five butterflies, a couple cats, a hippo, and a rock, along with his twenty-two monkeys- Jimmy, Rutha, Sebastian, Iggy, Ziggy, Fifi, Lulu, Jessie, Georgio, Pete, Harry, Freddie, Bobby, Ned, Arthur, Larry, Eddie, Walter, Quincy, Denny, Oliver, and Penny. He has a carnival every month on the second-to-last Wednesday, and plays talent show with his animals once a week.

Montana (Bob's cousin, for those of you who are too cruel to remember her) has moved into an apartment on Coruscant as close to the Jedi Temple as she can get, so she can spend more time with Bob, since he is practically her only family. After all, everyone else had deserted Montana quite a while back. What's that? I've never told you Montana's history? Well then.

Montanna was born about six years before Bob in a little town known as The South on a random planet so far out in the outer rim that it isn't even the outer rim. It's like, the outer, outer rim. Or, the way-far-out-there rim. Anyways, when she was eighteen she decided she liked puppies and moved very far away to a different planet and lived in a cave making sharpening rocks with her _bare hands._ No one ever kept touch with her, and when she finally decided to go and see how long she had been there, she found out that it had only been five minutes. So she went back home. That's when she found that everyone had decided to move away while she was gone, and only dust remained. But then they all came back and laughed because it had just been a prank.

Anywho, Montana moved back with her family and eventually decided to go visit Bob as we've already discussed, and now lives in the apartment by the Jedi Temple.

Barriss built a greenhouse on the balcony of her and Luminara's quarters and likes to farm her pretty little kiwi trees. Luminara hates kiwis but she tries just to not care.

Anakin and Ahsoka have been doing many random things as well. Anakin has mostly gotten over his unicorn obsession, (emphasis on _MOSTLY._), and has moved onto sandwiches. He makes them every day for lunch and for snacks and unless Ahsoka _begs _him to make something else, he makes them for dinner too. Usually Ahsoka just gets herself something to eat and doesn't let him anywhere near it. One time, Ahsoka went to the grocery store and realized how much she _loved_ pomegranate flavored yogurt. It went like this:

Ahsoka walks into the store and sees a sign for cereal. She walks by and finds pomegranate yogurt. She buys it and goes home. She eats it. She LOVES IT! Tada!

Ever since the attachment rule had been obliterated, Padme and Anakin have been switching off between staying at Padme's apartment and staying at Anakin and Ahsoka's quarters. Ahsoka usually came with Anakin when they stayed at Padme's place, and they all stayed up late and had hot chocolate and cookies while watching TV and playing "which commercial thinks I'm dumber" during commercial breaks. Anakin once saw a commercial for duct tape flavored toothpaste and _insisted_ they buy some.

Yoda has started a club for people who like corndogs. So far he has three members: a fairy puppet, a can of cherry soda, and a rock.

Shaak Ti took a vacation to The Great Place with Lots of Beaches (and I know it's not really called that).

Rex buys a new video game every three days and often gets together with other clones and plays group games on the TV.

With that being said, back to Anakin and Ahsoka.

After finishing his big bowl of snail gumbo, shells and all, Anakin went to go poke Obi-Wan with a stick.

Ahsoka thought that sounded like fun and came with him.

_Knock, knock, knock!_

Obi-Wan opened the door and saw the two of them standing there.

"HI OBI DEAR!" Anakin shouted at the stop of his lungs, and then started laughing hysterically. He poked Obi-Wan's shoulder with the stick.

Obi-Wan just stared at him blankly, and closed the door.

"Wow," Ahsoka murmured. "THAT WAS AWESOME!"

"I know right? Hey let's go to a haunted house!" Anakin suggested.

"Alrighty!" Ahsoka replied.

The two of them went to the hanger and got in a random ship that they were given permission to borrow. At least that's what Anakin said.

But right as they were about to leave, Kit ran over to them being followed by his entire entourage of animals. "Hey, wait for me! I wanna come to wherever you're going!"

"We're going to a haunted house!" Anakin said with a grin.

"Ohhhh I hate haunted houses, they remind me too much of my grandma's house," said Kit. "I'll stay here."

"Ok!"

Anakin and Ahsoka flew away and eventually came to a tiny little house that was painted purple and pink and had bunnies in the yard.

"This is a haunted house?" Ahsoka asked.

"The scariest of them all," Anakin said shakily as he crept up to the house. One of the bunnies hopped over to him. "AAAHHH!" he screamed.

"Master, it's a bunny."

"Oh. I knew that." Anakin went inside the tiny house.

Ahsoka followed him.

As soon as they entered, they noticed that the house was _much _bigger on the inside. All the rooms were completely dark, and they could hear scary music playing in the background.

The two of them walked further into the first room, and the music grew spookier. Then, all of a sudden, they saw a creepy man standing there in the dark, staring at them!

"AAAAHHHH!" Anakin screamed at the top of his lungs and hid behind Ahsoka.

Ahsoka stared at the guy, too frightened to move.

The scary man took one step closer, and then all the lights went on, and they saw that the spooky man was actually just a janitor with a broom, holding a music player that was playing scary music.

"AAAAAAHHHH IT'S A JANITOR!" Anakin wailed. He ran into the closet and crashed into a ladder. The ladder toppled over and knocked into a shelf which sent four cans of glow in the dark paint on top of him. He fainted from shock.

Ahsoka stared at him, too shocked to move. After overcoming the shock, she ran over to him. "Master, are you alright?"

Anakin didn't move.

The janitor walked over. "Duuuude. What are you two doing in Jim's house?"

"Anakin said it was a haunted house," Ahsoka replied, rolling her eyes at the stupidity of the idea.

The light flickered a little. "Oh, but it _is,_" the janitor replied. This house is haunted by ghost bananas." The light flickered again, and Ahsoka watched as the janitor kept flicking the switch on and off like an idiot trying to scare people.

"Uh, yeah. Whatever," she replied. She tried to revive Anakin from his unconscious state, but had no success.

"I can show you around while you're waiting for your friend to wake up, if you'd like," said the janitor. "They say the ghost bananas only show up when you're wearing pink."

Ahsoka looked down at the clothes she had decided to wear today. Blue and green shirt, green skirt, blue shoes, and a bracelet. "I'm not wearing pink, dude."

"That's ok, 'cause I am!" The janitor pointed to the tiny, tiny, _tiny_ little pink words embroidered on his jacket that said 'janitor.'

"Uh… ok…"

"Let's go!" The janitor started walking down the hallway.

Ahsoka took one last look at Anakin and decided to follow the janitor.

The janitor showed her many nice things in the house, including the kangaroo room, the backyard which was indoors, an indoor-outdoor space port, and a bathtub. But after looking around for several hours, there was no sign of any "ghost bananas."

"Mr. janitor, sir, I don't think there really are any ghost bananas," said Ahsoka as they walked towards the kitchen for the third time.

"But there are! I've seen them," the janitor insisted.

They walked into the kitchen, and Ahsoka gasped at the sight. There were banana peels all over the floor, and they were glowing. "Ghost… bananas…" she whispered.

Then suddenly, a glowing figure approached them, eating one of the bananas!

Ahsoka and the janitor both screamed as loud as they possibly could. The janitor fainted.

The glowing figure just dropped the banana and screamed back.

Ahsoka recognized that scream… "Anakin?"

The figure turned on the lights in the kitchen, and it was indeed Anakin, covered in the glow in the dark paint. "SNIPPIES! YOU'RE ALIVE!" He hugged Ahsoka tightly and got paint on her too. "I thought you just like DISAPPEARED because I woke up and you were just GONE and I only cried for about five minutes but then I decided to look for you but all I found was a really nice bottle of glue but then I came to the kitchen and ate all the bananas and then you showed up with the- CREEPY JANITOR AAAHHH I HATE JANITORS LET'S GET OUT OF HERE NOW!" He ran out of the room, out of the house, back to the ship, and flew away without Ahsoka.

Ahsoka just stared at the door, wondering what in the galaxy just happened.

…

"TOUR GROUP TIME!" Kit shouted into a microphone. He was currently standing on the podium in the auditorium, surrounded by all his animals, and in the audience was a crowd of over five hundred people who had traveled the galaxy to come on one of Kit's tours. "TODAY, WE WILL BE OBSERVING MANY SPECTACULAR THINGS LIKE ROCKS AND POND SCUM, AS WELL AS COUNTLESS ORGANISMS AND THINGIES! IT'S GONNA ROCK!" He set down the microphone and the crowd erupted in deafening applause, cheering and screaming.

Kit began to walk out of the room and went outside. He climbed up into the driver's seat of the double-decker bus which was attached to five other busses behind it, as well as fifteen cages for all his animals.

People crowded out the door in a huge mob, fighting each other over who got to sit on the first bus where Kit actually was. After thirty minutes of figuring it out, everyone was on board, including the animals.

"Alright, everyone ready?" Kit said through his microphone. The microphone he used went to speakers at all points of each bus, and there were even headphones that would translate what he said into any other language, including Pig Latin.

He entered the hanger with the giant bus-train, and spotted Anakin who was returning from the haunted house. He was still screaming about creepy janitors.

"And there, my wonderful friends, is the Dorkius Ani-kinous. The Dorkius Ani-kinous is an omnivore, and will eat anything you put in front of him. If you ever come across one of these horrific creatures, do not let him anywhere near your refrigerator. Or your pets, or your kids."

Anakin looked up at the giant bus. "AAAAAAHHHH! GIANT FREAKY BUS WITH KIT DRIVING IT! BILLIONS OF PEOPLE! _SEA CUCUMBERS!_" He passed out right there in the hanger.

"Don't let his outward appearance and foolish tactics trick you, he is a deadly killer." Kit drove away into a large hallway of the Jedi Temple which had been installed because Mace likes to drive semi trucks through the Temple on Saturdays for fun.

Obi-Wan saw the giant bus coming and set out a cardboard rancor for him to run over.

Kit ran over the rancor. "To your left is the Obeyone Kanobe. His daily activities include watching romantic comedies, playing with fire, and eating popsicles. No one knows where this strange creature has originated from, but if we knew, we'd be sure to release him back into his natural habitat."

Obi-Wan waved to them. Kit, along with all the people and the intelligent animals, waved back.

Obi-Wan then noticed that Kit had giraffes. "I want a giraffe!" he shouted to Kit.

Kit couldn't hear him. "Shh, everyone quiet down. The Obeyone Kanobe is attempting to make contact."

Obi-Wan shouted again.

"I am going out into the wild to try and communicate with the creature. Stand by." Kit exited the bus and walked over to Obi-Wan. "What is it you said?"

"I want a giraffe," he repeated quietly and sadly.

"Ohhh. Well I've got three of them. You can have Sally if you want," Kit said to him.

Obi-Wan's eyes got big and sparkly. "I CAN?"

"Sure." Kit went into the back and got Sally from the animal cage. "Say your goodbyes, sweet Sally!"

Sally made whatever kind of noise a giraffe makes and walked out of the cage.

"Here ya go, Obi-Wan." Kit gave him the giraffe.

"FINALLY! MY VERY OWN GIRAFFE!" Obi-Wan screamed at the top of his lungs. He hugged Sally and dragged her away to his quarters.

Kit brushed off his hands, knowing he resolved that matter well, and went back into his bus.

…

"CORNDOG LOVERS OF GALAXY, UNITE WE DO!" Yoda screamed. He waited for his other club members to say something too, but they didn't. He sat back down and pouted.

…

Sidious walked up to a hair salon. It had been AGES since he did anything to his hair, which was white and falling out. "I need a new hairdo. The Republic will _definitely_ be terrified of me then."

So he sat down and read a magazine about home improvement while he waited.

"Mesa bein' ready to help yousa now!" a voice said.

Sidious looked up and saw none other than Jar Jar Binks standing in front of him with scissors and a spray bottle of water. "YOU are the hair dresser? You can't even talk right, why in the GALAXY would I let you touch my precious hair?"

"Becuz mesa been trained for dis-sa workin'!" Jar Jar replied. "Mesa fail all da tests, but theysa let me workin' here anyway!"

Sidious decided that even if more harm than good could come out of this, that kind of was what he was going for anyway, so he sat in the chair and let Jar Jar drape the protective thingy around his neck. It was pink and had bubbles on it.

"Now, whatsa are wesa doin' here todaysa? Just a muoi muoi trim, or sum'thin biggah?" Jar Jar asked.

"Anything is fine as long as it will terrify the republic scum!" Sidious exclaimed.

"Okiedai!" Jar Jar dumped jars of hair dye on his head and clumsily chopped away with the scissors. He then put Sidious under one of those weird looking dryer things with the giant upside-down bowl on top.

An elderly woman sitting next to him looked at him and smiled sweetly.

"What are you looking at, lady?" Sidious snapped.

"Humph!" The woman looked back at her magazine.

Sidious sat there boredly for what felt like days. "Am I done in this stupid chair or what! I've got people to destroy!"

Jar Jar removed the top and took off the metallic thingies he had put in Sidious's hair. "Yousa bein' in a muoi muoi bombad mood today, do yousa be needin' a hug?" He hugged Sidious.

Sidious then realized- his life's purpose wasn't to make people miserable, it was to make people happy! He looked at his hair in the mirror. It was all poofy and was green and pink. "I… LOVE IT!" he exclaimed, and hugged Jar Jar again. "Thank you freaky tall frog man!" He paid Jar Jar extra for the hair cut and put on a top hat over his hair.

He walked over to the woman who had smiled at him earlier. "I apologize for my exceedingly rude comment, ma'am. Your hair looks absolutely stunning, by the way." He tipped his hat.

The woman's heart melted and she fainted.

Sidious then walked away cheerfully. He bought an ice cream cone (grape flavored, of course,) and skipped along.

…

After walking across town, Ahsoka finally reached the Jedi Temple again and decided to go see what Obi-Wan was doing.

Obi-Wan was in his quarters, petting his giraffe and going on and on to Satine about how much he's always wanted a giraffe. "Ahsoka! Look at my cutie little giraffe isn't she wonderful!"

"Whoa, a giraffe? Don't they like, eat jelly or something?" Ahsoka asked.

"I dunno! Let's find out!" Obi-Wan got some peach jam from the refrigerator.

"Obi-Wan, that's jam. I said jelly," Ahsoka told him.

"Oh. Aren't they the same thing?"

"No! Go fix it!"

"Ok, ok!" Obi-Wan got some strawberry jelly and gave it to the giraffe. The giraffe ate it and started dancing. "Yippee! Let's all dance with Sally!"

So they all danced with the giraffe.

…

Later, Anakin came home and found Ahsoka frantically typing away on the computer. "Hi Ahsoka! What'cha doing?"

"I'm on this AWESOME new website I just found! It's called HeadNovel!" Ahsoka exclaimed excitedly, and proceeded to post a ridiculous picture of herself on her HeadNovel page.

"What the… You said 'HeadNovel'?" Anakin said confusedly.

"YES. HEADNOVEL. IT'S TOTALLY AWESOME." Ahsoka continued typing and posted her HeadNovel status as: "HELLO WONDERFUL GALAXY!"

Anakin just stood there and watched, wondering what on earth would come of this…

**I very much hope you enjoyed the very first chapter of A Not-So-Normal Week 4! Review, stay tuned, leave an idea, and don't die of excitement! :D**


	2. HeadNovel, Cupcakes, and Dates, Oh My!

**Hello to my wonderful readers! Thank you SO MUCH for all the reviews! It made me soooo happy to get such an amazing turnout for the very first chapter!**

**Questions, then specific idea credit from last chapter (By the way: for future chapters, including this one, credit for ideas will be given at the END of the chapter, for the sake of not risking the entire chapter plot XD)**

**Ayy Kaim asked/said: "But I thought Obi-Wan drank the Normal potion and is now normal." Answer: Well, that was one of the things I debated when I considered writing NSNW4- what about the other universe that we told everyone takes place after NSNW3? I solved this by declaring the the universe we told you happens after NSNW3 (Obi-Wan drinking the normal potion, us living in a house in Pennsylvania, etc.) is another completely _different _universe. NSNW4 is picking up several months after NSNW3 ended, and is as if the "other universe" never happened. Does that help? XD**

**TARDISjedigirl asked: "And the house was BIGGER ON THE INSIDE. AND HAD BANANAS IN IT. Was it the Doctor's vacation house?" Answer: Honestly, I had no idea bananas were involved with the Doctor, LOL, but you never know! Maybe it was! XD**

**Inksaber asked: "It's great to have you back, Blue- now can I die of excitement?" Answer: No. If you do, then you won't be able to read the rest. Logic, people, logic!**

**IDEA CREDIT FROM CHAPTER 1: Thanks to "An Ahsoka Tano Fan" for the idea about the haunted house and ghost bananas! (in case you don't remember your own idea, An Ahsoka Tano Fan, it was in a review on NSNW3 :D) There were also a lot of ideas given by Liv! Which ideas these were, I don't particularly remember! But she knows I love her for all her ideas, so I'm just gonna give her a general thank you for the moment. XD I think that's it for this time.**

**NOW, ON TO CHAPTER 2! 8D**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 2: HeadNovel, Cupcakes, and Dates, Oh My!**

_Anakin just stood there and watched, wondering what on earth would come of this…_

"You should TOTALLY join HeadNovel, Master!" Ahsoka exclaimed, extremely randomly. "IT'S THE BEST THING EVER!" She looked at the screen and burst out into hysterical laughter.

"What's so funny?" Anakin asked.

"SOMEONE COMMENTED ON MY STATUS!" she said through her laughter.

"What did they say?"

Ahsoka tried to stop laughing but couldn't. "They said- they said… 'dude.'" She burst out laughing even harder than before and went absolutely insane.

Anakin just stared at her. "Uhh… ok…. Well… I'm gonna go make a sandwich." He went into the kitchen and tried to find the bread. The bread was gone. "OH. MY. GOSH." He nearly fainted. "THE BREAD IS GONE!"

Still dying of laughter over the pathetic HeadNovel comment, Ahsoka had absolutely no idea why Anakin was screaming at the top of his lungs.

Anakin started crying and ran to tell Obi-Wan. He didn't bother knocking and kicked the door down.

Obi-Wan was in the kitchen making muffins with Sally. He had already made peanut butter guava muffins, metallic chai tea muffins, chicken ramen muffins, and was now making a batch of Gravel Surprise muffins. "And then you add…" he paused to read the recipe. "Well, the recipe says '1 cup sugar', but we're going to add 10, ok?"

"OBI-WAN MY BREAD IS GONE!" Anakin screamed, running into the room.

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan said excitedly when he saw him. "Have a muffin!" He thrust a chicken ramen muffin into Anakin's face.

Anakin took the muffin and tasted it. Suddenly he forgot all about his lost bread. "This… is… amazing…!" He started dancing and skipping around the room. "I will never eat pencil shavings again!"

Suddenly, Pinkie Pie showed up out of nowhere. "Ooh! You know what you gotta make next? Huh huh huh? Do ya do ya?"

"PINKIE!" Obi-Wan squealed. "WHAT DO WE HAVE TO MAKE NEXT?" He was really, _really _excited Pinkie Pie was right there in front of him and was having a random fan moment.

"You gotta make cupcakes! For a party!" Pinkie Pie had an excited grin on her face.

"CUPCAKES?" Obi-Wan screamed. "I _LOVE _CUPAKES! Oooh a party? What party?"

"I dunno! It can be a Happy Monday party! Any day of the week is GREAT for a party!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed.

"Ok! HAPPY MONDAY!" Obi-Wan declared loudly.

"It's Wednesday," Anakin stated plainly. Then he kept skipping and singing about chicken ramen muffins.

"It's Sunday," Satine mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"HAPPY MONDAY!" Obi-Wan shrieked even louder and more excitedly.

"Woo hoo!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed and bounced up and down.

Obi-Wan rubbed his hands together and beamed from ear to ear. "What kind of cupcakes are we making?"

"The yummy kind!" Pinkie Pie replied with another excited grin. "You know how to make them right?"

"Um…" Obi-Wan paused to think. "A recipe?"

"Not just any recipe, silly! The special Pinkie Pie recipe for cupcakes!" Pinkie Pie stated.

Obi-Wan screamed elatedly.

"So do ya know how to make them?" Pinkie Pie asked, going right up in his face and staring at him excitedly. "Do ya do ya do ya?"

"No, will you teach me?" Obi-Wan asked, looking beyond excited.

"Okie dokie Lokie!" Pinkie Pie said to him, and started singing as she began to make the cupcakes. "All you have to do is take a cup of flour, add it to the mix!" She added the flour to a big bowl.

Obi-Wan watched with wide, sparkly eyes and a grin so big it could have jumped right off his face.

Pinkie Pie continued to sing. "Now just take a little something sweet, not sour," she added various candy items. "Add a bit of salt, just a pinch."

"CANDY!" Obi-Wan screamed as loud as he possibly could, breaking all the windows and making Anakin crash into the wall and fall over.

Pinkie Pie completely ignored him and kept singing. "Baking these treats is such a cinch! Add a teaspoon of vanillaaaaa," she added the vanilla as she kept singing. "Add a little more you count to four, and you never get your fill oooooooof," she sang and began bouncing around the room as she continued the song. "Cupcaaaaakes, so sweet and tasty! Cupcaaaakes, don't be too hasty! Cupcaaaaaakes! Cupcakes cupcakes CUPCAAAAAAAAAAAKES!"

Obi-Wan had his jaw on the ground and was staring in complete awe. He was so happy he thought he was going to explode.

Pinkie Pie put the cupcakes in the oven. "Now all we gotta do is wait! And that's how you make cupcakes." She smiled excitedly.

With the overly elated grin still pasted across his face, Obi-Wan passed out from the sheer awesomeness.

Pinkie Pie thought he was still awake. "I know, aren't they great?"

Anakin jumped off the ground where he had fell over after crashing into the wall. "MY BREAD IS GOOOONE!" he wailed miserably.

"Oh don't worry! I know how to make bread!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed. "I've got a making-bread song too-"

"NOT. ANOTHER. SONG." Satine shouted from the other room.

Pinkie Pie frowned.

"CUPCAAAKES!" Obi-Wan squealed, waking up. "Where are they, where are they?"

Becoming excited once again, Pinkie Pie smiled widely. "They're in the oven!"

Obi-Wan looked at her with his big, shiny eyes. "How long do we have to wait for them?"

Pinkie Pie looked at the clock. "About 25 more minutes!"

Suddenly, a random hat that looked like an upside-down bowl flew through the window like a Frisbee and landed on the ground in front of the oven.

"CREEPY FLYING HAT!" Obi-Wan shrieked.

Anakin walked up to the hat. "It's… it's… I've got nothing."

Then, someone climbed through the now broken window. Embo. He picked up the hat off the ground. He said something that I didn't understand in whatever language he speaks.

Pinkie Pie, for some freakish reason, could understand him. "Why yes! We made cupcakes and they're in the oven and they'll be done soon and do ya want one when they're ready?"

Embo said something else.

"Of course you can have one, Mister! We wouldn't think of not sharing one with you!" Pinkie Pie said to him.

"They're the yummy kind of cupcakes!" Obi-Wan said, breaking out in a giant smile again.

Anakin stared at him for about five minutes, and then started wailing about his lost bread again.

Suddenly Ahsoka ran through the room with her phone. "GUYS YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE IT! I GOT TO LEVEL SIX MILLION AND TWO ON CHICKEN FARM VILLAGE!" She looked completely crazy and started frantically typing away at the tiny keys on her phone.

Embo murmured something to himself.

"Gee, I dunno! Maybe if you ask her what Chicken Farm Village is she'd tell you," Pinkie Pie said.

Having heard her, Ahsoka ran straight up to Embo and shoved the phone screen in his face. "THIS IS CHICKEN FARM VILLAGE. IT'S THE BEST GAME ON THE FACE OF HEADNOVEL! HEY ARE YOU ON HEADNOVEL I'LL ADD YOU AS A FRIEND!" She looked at her phone screen again. "AHAHAHAHA! SOMEONE SENT ME A COW! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" She fell over laughing.

Pinkie Pie suddenly gasped excitedly as she looked at the clock again. "The cupcakes are done!" She pranced over to the oven and took them out, using an oven mitt between her teeth. She set them down on the counter. "They're perfect!"

"I want one!" Obi-Wan squealed.

"Five more minutes, and they'll be cooled!"

"Whyyyyy!" Obi-Wan pouted.

"WHY CAN YOU EVEN SEND COWS? IT'S CALLED _CHICKEN FARM VILLAGE_ I DON'T EVEN GET IT! IT'S SO TOTALLY AWESOME!" Ahsoka continued to laugh like a maniac and stare at the tiny screen.

Anakin sniffed. "My lovely bread, oh how I miss thee."

The cupcakes were now cool, and Obi-Wan grabbed one and gobbled it up in one big bite. "O. M. G." He fainted.

Pinkie Pie ate one in one huge bite.

Embo took one, ate it, and said something.

"I'm sooooo glad you like them, Mister!" Pinkie Pie said, bouncing a little.

Satine walked over and plucked a cupcake from the pan. She tasted it. "This… is… AWESOME."

And they stood there and continued to eat cupcakes while Ahsoka played Chicken Farm Village on HeadNovel.

…

Mace had been mopey and depressed ever since Aayla whacked him with the tree and left him. "Whyyyyy, _whyyyy_ did she have to leave me?" he sobbed to his psychiatrist, who came every couple days to try and console the Jedi Master.

"She doesn't like you, duh," the psychiatrist, whose name was Otto, replied bluntly.

"BUT I LOVE HER SO MUCH!" Mace broke down and sobbed even harder. He had been sobbing for several months straight without doing anything else. Don't ask me how he's still alive.

"Dude. I've been giving you helpless advice for like 5 months or something. You need to BE A MAN!" Otto shouted.

Mace sniffed. "How do I be a man?"

"By doing _manly_ things. Like motorcycle riding and helping old ladies cross the street."

"But I don't know any old ladies!" Mace wailed.

"Then start with the motorcycle riding," Otto said simply.

Mace sniffed again, managing for the first time in months to pull himself together. "Ok. I can do this!"

_4 hours later_

"I CAN'T DO THIS!" Mace wailed. He had spent the past 4 hours falling off of the motorcycle, crashing into ice cream stands, getting distracted by thinking about mint candies, singing songs, and falling into manholes.

"You just need to MAN UP, dude. Seriously," said Otto.

"You are a mean psychiatrist and I don't like you!" Mace exclaimed, crossing his arms over his chest and pouting.

"Well fine, I'm only getting paid a lot for this job anyway. I QUIT!" Otto threw his invisible hat into an invisible river, got on his own motorcycle, and rode away.

Mace watched him drive away. He was silent for 20 minutes. Then he started crying.

Anakin had eventually gotten bored of standing around watching Obi-Wan and Pinkie Pie eat cupcakes, and Ahsoka was _still_ on HeadNovel, so he had left, sobbing about his lost bread.

He walked by Mace, who was sitting on the ground in front of the fifty-third ice cream stand he crashed into. "Did you lose your bread too?" Anakin asked him.

"No! Otto says I'm not manly!" Mace wailed miserably. "And he _QUIT_!" He started sobbing harder.

Anakin patted Mace's shoulder. "It's at times like these that I always eat a sandwich. Oh right. I CAN'T BECAUSE MY BREAD IS GOOOONE!" Even though he had stopped crying for a moment, he just started crying again.

The man at the ice cream stand got really emotional watching the two of them, and he started crying too.

Then the muffin man showed up, and he started to cry.

A mother walked up to the ice cream stand with her little girl, but after seeing the four grown men crying their eyes out like three-year-olds throwing a temper tantrum, she quickly left to find another ice cream stand to go to.

Then a giant bar of soap fell out of the sky.

"Ooooooh, soap!" Anakin exclaimed, suddenly becoming cheerful again and forgetting about his lost bread.

While Mace, the ice cream man, and the muffin man kept crying, Anakin climbed on top of the giant bar of soap. "Ki-Adi would just _love _this, he throws soap at sheep on his birthday every year!" He was silent for a moment. "MY BREAD IS GONE!" He started crying again.

The muffin man walked up to the giant bar of soap and started licking it.

The ice cream man whacked the muffin man in the head with a wooden shoe and shoved him out of the way. He drew a happy face in the soap with his fingernail.

Mace kept crying.

Anakin then noticed the soap was actually bread scented and started eating it. "EWWW GROSS THIS DOESN'T TASTE LIKE BREAD!" He spit it out and it smacked Mace in the face.(rhyme!)

The muffin man and ice cream man stared at Anakin, then Mace.

Mace passed out.

The muffin man crept up to him and put mini muffins on his eyes.

Anakin decided that there _must_ be a treasure chest in the middle of the bar of soap, since that always happens in movies. He took out a DVD case and started digging.

Spiderman fell from the sky, crashed into a wallaby, and got eaten by pigeons.

"Hey! No one touch my wallaby!" Anakin shouted, still digging with the DVD case.

Suddenly, Rex walked by casually, sipping a glass of mango lemonade. He spotted the giant bar of soap and began to watch Anakin dig in it, slurping at his straw.

Anakin eventually noticed him and froze in place. He stared at Rex.

The two of them stared at each other for ten whole seconds.

"I'm looking for treasure in the bar of soap!" Anakin grinned excitedly and started digging again, faster this time.

"Cool, man. I'm looking for a girl." Rex sipped his lemonade.

"A girl?" the ice cream man asked. "What kind of girl?"

"A GIRL, MAN. I'M SINGLE," Rex shouted.

"I know lots of girls!" the muffin man exclaimed.

Mace woke up quickly, flinging the mini muffins into the soap. "AAYLA WON'T DATE ME!"

"Hm, she's got good taste," Rex remarked.

Ahsoka popped out of nowhere, phone still in hand. "And yooooou have your relationship status on HeadNovel as _single_! Too bad I've already got enough guys after me or I'd offer to let you date me just for your pitiful sake!" She laughed and started playing Chicken Farm Village.

Rex sighed, remembering that he had, this morning, posted his HeadNovel status as "Single ): " "Well, I'm going to be cool, calm, and collected. Nothing will distract me from my goal and- WHOA, IS THAT A NEW VIDEO GAME?" He spotted an ad on the poster that was next to the bus stop, and ran over to it. He crashed into it and fell over, and watched the little sparklies dance before his eyes. "Lollypops…!"

"YES!" Anakin suddenly exclaimed as he hit something with the DVD case. "I found treasure!"

It was a large case, and inside it were meatballs. There was also a note. It said: "Dear Anakin, you are a jerk too! Hehehe! Love, Obi-Wan!"

"Awww, Obi-Wan's so sweet!" Anakin exclaimed cheerily with sparkles in his eyes.

Ahsoka glanced at him for a minute, and then went back to the Jedi Temple, commenting on peoples' HeadNovel statuses, pressing the "this is awesome" button on countless pictures of pickles and coffee. Not looking where she was going, she crashed straight into someone and fell over. Momentarily glancing up from her phone screen, she noticed that she had crashed straight into Bob. Her eyes narrowed, and she stood up from where she had fallen. She glanced back at her phone screen and began to walk away.

"Wait, Ahsoka, dude!" Bob put his hand on her shoulder to stop her.

Ahsoka whirled around, smacking his hand off of her. "Don't touch me. I'm busy playing Chicken Farm Village." She started to walk away again.

Bob ran a little to get ahead of her, and turned to face her. "Ahsoka, I've been looking for you everywhere, please just let me talk to you!"

Ahsoka glanced up from her phone screen without lifting her head, giving the appearance of her glaring coldly at him. "What do you want, Bob? Can't you see I'm busy?"

"I've just been thinking…" Bob said slowly, shifting his weight a bit. "I really, really would like you to consider giving our relationship another chance."

Frowning again, Ahsoka put her hands on her hips. "Bob, you've been saying that to me every single day for the past _how many months_? Take a hint, _dude_; I'm not into you."

"But I have so much love in my heart, swelling up and longing to be released!"

Ahsoka pursed her lips a little. "Then why don't you date yourself, Lover Boy?" And she walked away.

Bob stood there, glancing at the ground and trying to grasp this. "Date… myself…? That doesn't sound like very much fun-!" He looked up, but found Ahsoka was gone.

Ahsoka walked back to her and Anakin's quarters, and was surprised to find Lux standing there as she approached the door. _Oh great…_

"Ahsoka! There you are! I've been searching the galaxy for you," said Lux, walking over to her.

"Lux. What in the _universe_ are you doing here?" Ahsoka asked him.

"I'm here to find you. I just said that. I thought you had like super sensitive hearing or something…"

"Go away, Lux," Ahsoka said firmly. She pressed a button on her phone and began to scroll the main page of HeadNovel.

Lux looked disappointed. "But it's taken me so long to get here! Can't we at least make out or something?"

"_WHAT_?" Ahsoka practically shrieked, almost dropping her phone. She stared at him in disbelief.

"Never mind…" Lux mumbled.

In her horror and shock, Ahsoka began to put together an idea…

She smiled almost sweetly at Lux. "Y'know, Lux, I do pity you; going after a girl who's already taken."

"Taken? Whaddya mean?" Lux asked.

"Taken," Ahsoka repeated. She spotted Bob beginning to make his way down the hallway, no doubt looking for her. "See, there's my boyfriend right now. Lemme go talk to him for a second, stay here, ok?"

Lux, confused as to whether he should totally angry or walk away miserable, just stood there.

Ahsoka walked over to Bob. "Hey, Bob. I know you're looking for me, aren't you?"

"Yes, why'd you just run off like that?" Bob asked.

"I didn't want you to have to know about this, Bob," Ahsoka said, feigning drama, "but- I've already got a boyfriend."

Bob's jaw dropped straight to the ground, and he stared at Ahsoka for five minutes. "You- you mean all this time, you've rejected me because you were already dating?"

Ahsoka closed her eyes, nodding. "I didn't want to have to tell you, but unfortunately, it's inevitable now." She smirked to herself, then looked back up at Bob. "My boyfriend's right over there." She motioned to Lux.

Bob got a determined look on his face and began to approach Lux.

Lux, seeing him, raised an eyebrow slightly, and walked towards Bob as well.

Ahsoka watched with a smirk, pleased at how her plan was working.

The two came face to face with each other, glared into the other's eyes, and then, both Bob and Lux exclaimed in exact unison: "You stole my girlfriend!"

**Oh the suspense! D8**

**IDEA CREDIT: Liv- HeadNovel (name) ; Driftstar- Anakin's bread going missing; DuchessSatineKenobi3- Embo's cameo; (next one is a combined credit) TARDISjedigirl- adding my little pony characters - Liv- writing Pinkie Pie**

**If I left someone out, I apologize! It's hard to keep up with all these great ideas! XD**

**Anywho, stay tuned for chapter 3!**


	3. The Game Show

**Yay for chapter 3! :D I'm so glad I got to finish this up today, I thought I wasn't gonna have any time to do anything at all today! xDDD**

**(p.s. did anyone read Emblem Star? We are short a few reviiieeewsss... ;3 )**

**Aayla Kit asked: "Who took Anakin's bread? Seriously, WHO? Did one of my 20,000,000 favorite bount hunters steal it?" Answer: To be revealed at a later time ;)**

**DarkDreamer666 asked: "doesn't Ahsoka actually like Lux? Sounds like she's just messin with him" Answer: Well, not in this story, she doesn't. xD**

**On the topic of Ahsoka romances, this chapter will end up being purely my take on it, and just because it may seem like I'm against all other Ahsoka pairings (which I am, but that's besides my point), all I mean is that I don't want you to get offended if I don't like a particular romantic pairing for _any_ characters. And of course, this story is all in the name of fun. ;) :D NOW READ. XDDDD**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 3: The Game Show**

_Bob and Lux exclaimed in exact unison: "You stole my girlfriend!" _

As Ahsoka watched, pleased at how this would turn out, Anakin suddenly strolled casually up to Bob and Lux. He was eating a sandwich which he had bought from a local sandwich joint on his way back from the giant bar of soap. "Why, gentlemen, this is no matter for a petty argument!" he exclaimed, stuffing his mouth with a bite of the sandwich (bologna and banana taffy, of course).

Lux looked at him. "And how would you know, strange man who eats the meat of unicorns?"

"Yeah, really," Bob added.

"Because," said Anakin, swallowing his bite of sandwich. "This is a matter to be resolved on my new game show!"

"Game… show…?" Ahsoka said quizzically from where she stood.

"Yes! It's called 'Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl'!" Anakin exclaimed, grinning. "The name's a work in progress."

"Wait- what?" Ahsoka asked.

"Sounds good to me, since we all know I'm the only _canon _pairing for Ahsoka," Lux stated.

"That isn't true! You're a jerk anyways!" Bob shouted.

"Please, ladies, please, save your debates for the game show," Anakin said, stuffing the rest of the sandwich in his mouth.

"…Ladies…?" Lux said with an awkward expression on his face.

"C'mhn, nu time tu washte!" Anakin mumbled with his mouth full.

"There's no way I'm going on some stupid game show," Ahsoka said, crossing her arms defiantly over her chest.

"Yesh yu ar," said Anakin as he continued to chew his sandwich. He grabbed Ahsoka's arm and began to drag her away.

"Hey! Let go of me!" Ahsoka cried, struggling to get away from him.

Anakin finished chewing his sandwich and swallowed. "No. You're gonna be on my game show whether you like it or not!"

Bob and Lux followed Anakin as he dragged Ahsoka all the way to the set.

Anakin instructed Bob and Lux to stay behind the scene of the set until he called for them, and brought Ahsoka out to the stage, where the audience was already waiting.

Grabbing a microphone, Anakin shoved Ahsoka into a chair on the far right side of the stage, and then walked over to his little podium on the left side of the stage. "Hellooooooooo audience, and welcome to 'Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl'!" he said into the microphone.

The audience started clapping and cheering.

"Today, on 'Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl,' we have eight guys who have been known on different records throughout our archive to have liked the girl we've chosen for today's episode," Anakin said to the audience.

Ahsoka listened to him. _Eight guys? What the heck?_

"First up is a Padawan learner who lives at the Jedi Temple and has been seeking out Ahsoka's love for months. Please give a warm welcome to, BOB!" Anakin shouted into the mic.

Bob was kicked out onto the stage by a giant red boxing glove. Stumbling as he tried to maintain balance, he walked towards the end chair which was lined up with seven other chairs. He waved to the audience a little as they clapped.

"Next," said Anakin as Bob took a seat, "is the son of a Separatist senator, and how he actually came to like Ahsoka, I have no clue. Please welcome, LUX!"

Also kicked onto stage by the boxing glove, Lux waved dramatically to the crowd and took a seat next to Bob, glaring at him a little. Ahsoka rolled her eyes.

"The next guy is a young bounty hunter who has been paired up with Ahsoka in various universes such as this one! Give it up for… Boba Fett!"

"What the heck…!" Ahsoka murmured to herself as Boba got kicked out on stage by the glove and took a seat. Boba grinned at her. She rolled her eyes again and looked away.

Anakin waited until he was seated. "Next is another popular romantic pairing between thousands of fans across the galaxy! While I was pretty sure neither of them actually had any romantic interest in each other, he's been looking for a girl lately; so without further ado, welcome Captain Rex!"

Rex bounced onto the stage after being kicked by the boxing glove and took a seat next to Boba.

"Anakin!" Ahsoka shouted to him. "When I said I would date Rex, I WAS KIDDING!"

"Shut up and wait for the next guy!" Anakin shouted back. "Next is a pod racer who fell for Ahsoka during a pod race which she had to disguise as a racer in! Luckily, no literal 'falling for' took place during the race!" The audience laughed at Anakin's corny joke. "Please welcome Kid Kareen!"

The greenish-blue Twi'lek by the name of Kid Kareen got kicked out on stage by the boxing glove, waving to the audience. He sat down next to Rex.

"They should call this show 'search the galaxy for all the pathetic men who are after you,'" Ahsoka mumbled to herself.

"The next few are more strange pairings which apparently actually _exist_ in one form or another…" Anakin said. "Let's all give a hand to Cad Bane, Count Dooku, and General Grievous…?"

Bane, Dooku, and Grievous walked out on stage and took the remaining seats.

Ahsoka nearly threw up.

"Alright, now that we've introduced all these wonderful men, I would like to point out one thing, which is that according to our research, I should actually be up there with those guys. But because I'm quite obviously married and have absolutely no desire to date my Padawan, I'm staying out of this," Anakin stated.

"Oh thank the Force," Ahsoka murmured with a heaving sigh of relief.

"Now! Rules!" Anakin exclaimed, getting out his papers. He turned to the guys. "The rules for this show are as follows: One, once you are eliminated, you must leave the set immediately and not complain. Two, if you lose, you obviously have no reason to date the girl in question, so you are advised to leave her alone after you lose. Three, no lollypops on the set," he paused to glare at Dooku, "and yes, I _am _talking to you, Dooku."

Dooku pouted.

"Alright, I think those are the only rules. The way this game show works is simple. We will go through a series of tests and questions, and after each round, one person will get eliminated. At the end, once there is only one guy left, he will be given the opportunity to go on a date with the girl in question- in this case, Ahsoka Tano. Does everyone understand?" Anakin asked the contestants.

They all nodded.

"Good. Alright, now, it is time to seeeeee," he said in a very dramatic game-show-host-like way, "Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl! … Right after these commercials."

The show faded away and the screen went blank. The commercials began to play.

"Aw darn! Why do they ALWAYS DO THAT?" Chuchi asked, who was at Barriss and Luminara's quarters, watching "Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl" with Barriss.

"I don't know but I'm still totally shocked that Ahsoka is on TV! I love this show!" Barriss squealed.

"Who d'ya think is gonna get to date her?" Chuchi asked, pulling her knees up to her chest on the couch and glancing at the commercial for piano insurance.

"If it's Dooku, Bane, or Grievous, I'm going to die of disgust," said Barriss. "Actually, first I'll bury Ahsoka after she dies of disgust, _then_ I'll die."

"Include Captain Rex in there," said Chuchi. "He's like, what, 6 years older than her?"

"Well, Master Skywalker's wife is five years older than him…"

Chuchi's eyes widened, having not known this. "Dude."

"I know right?"

The commercials ended, and the show came back on. Chuchi and Barriss watched intently.

"Welcome back, all you viewers at home! Now it's time to see…" Anakin trailed off and let the audience finish his sentence.

"WHICH GUY GETS TO DATE THE GIRL!"

Ahsoka had a hand over her eyes, mortified from this experience.

"For the first round," said Anakin, "each of you is going to tell how you met Ahsoka, and why you like her." He handed another mic to Grievous, who got to start.

"Well, I met Ahsoka a long time ago during a battle on Skytop Station. I was fighting with her, wanted to kill her. That means I love her, right?" Grievous said. The audience clapped in a mediocre way. He passed the mic to Dooku.

"I'm like seventy-some years older than Ahsoka and I don't remember how I met her. My attraction to her is totally abnormal and I want to marry her," said Dooku.

Ahsoka slammed her head on the arm of her chair disgustedly.

Dooku passed on the mic to Bane. "Umm… I met Ahsoka when I fought with her in a battle, and I shocked her and captured her. But I actually like Sue now…"

"Ehhh!" Anakin made a buzzer sound. "I forgot that rule! No talking about past or present lovers other than Ahsoka!"

"Well sor-ree!" Bane exclaimed. "So, I don't know if I actually love her. But she's hot."

"Just kill me now," Ahsoka mumbled, slamming the palm of her hand on her forehead repeatedly.

Bane gave the mic to Kid. "I met Ahsoka when she was undercover as a pod racer during a pod race I was competing in. I love her from the bottom of my heart."

Next was Rex. "Um… I didn't think I actually liked Ahsoka…? But I'm looking for a girl, so if I win, she'll be good enough until I find someone else."

"Totally not the point of this show, dude!" Ahsoka shouted at him. She slumped down in her chair, still completely grossed out by all the creeps who were after her.

Boba took the mic after Rex. "As far as I can remember, I met Ahsoka as she held her lightsaber to Aurra's neck while I held a blaster to Plo's head. I've been in love ever since!"

"Excuse me for a moment." Ahsoka got up, left the stage, slammed her head really hard on a wall several times, and came back.

While everyone stared at her, Lux grabbed the mic. "I met Ahsoka when she came with Senator Amidala to talk to my mother. It was love at first sight, and I have been searching for her for a long time. She makes my heart float in the air on a cloud of ice cream and sparkles, and the only thing I want is to be with her."

The whole audience said "Awww!"

"I didn't say to get emotional, Lux," Anakin said as Lux handed the mic to Bob.

Bob stood up, figuring that maybe it would give him an advantage over the others. "I met Ahsoka at the Padawan Nutcracker Ballet two Christmases ago. She was my dance partner, and I realized then how much I love her. I thought at one point that she did actually like me, but perhaps I was wrong."

Ahsoka looked away a little.

"Thank you, fine gentlemen!" said Anakin. "That is the end of the first round. We will now go to our judges, and they will eliminate the one of you who isn't qualified to be the guy who gets to date the girl!"

A curtain pulled away from another whole section of the stage, revealing the judges: Yoda, C-3PO, and Padme.

"So, judges, who is eliminated in this round?" Anakin asked them.

The judges talked amongst themselves for a minute or two, and finally came up with a decision. 3PO stood from his chair. "The person who does not get to date the girl…"

"Will be revealed right after the break!" Anakin exclaimed.

Commercials began to play again.

"Oh gosh, Ahsoka's not gonna want to date _any _of those guys!" Barriss said, stuffing popcorn into her mouth.

"You can say that again. I mean Grievous. Seriously?" Chuchi began to imitate Grievous's voice. "I want to kill you, it must be love!"

Barriss fell off the couch laughing and choked on her popcorn.

"CPR! CPR!" Chuchi exclaimed.

Luminara ran into the room and started performing CPR on Barriss, but by that time she wasn't choking anymore.

"Stop it!"

"My work here is done." Luminara walked back into the kitchen.

The commercials ended, and the show resumed.

"Welcome back to 'Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl!'" Anakin said into his microphone. "The judges have turned in their results. The guy which _doesn't _get to date the girl is…"

The audience listened intently.

"Count Dooku!"

Sad music began to play and one spotlight went on Dooku, and another on Padme. She picked up a microphone. "Dooku, you're way to old for Ahsoka, you're ugly, and honestly most of the galaxy hates you. These were just a few of the reasons we decided to eliminate you."

Dooku sniffed as his eyes welled up with tears. "I understand. Thanks for the great opportunity, this has truly changed my life. I love you all! Peace out!" He exited stage right.

"'Changed my life'?" Ahsoka mumbled questioningly as she tried to overcome the relief that she wouldn't have to date Dooku.

"ROUND TWO," said a loud announcer voice.

"FRED!" Obi-Wan screamed from the audience.

"Round two," Anakin echoed the announcer. "I'm going to ask you another question, and all you have to do is answer it. The question is…. How has your life been changed since you realized your love for Ahsoka?"

They let Grievous go first again. "My life hasn't actually changed at all. I'm still a cruel cyborg who bakes cookies and stays trapped in a greenhouse all day."

The audience stared at him blankly.

Bane grabbed the microphone out of Grievous's hand.

"Well, uh… um… uhhhh… umm… um… ummm… um… uh…. Uhh…"

Kid rolled his eyes and took the microphone from Bane. "When she left the pod race after her mission was complete, I was terribly lonely. I've been searching her out ever since…"

"And it took you _two years_?" Ahsoka asked.

"Yes. It did."

Ahsoka face palmed again.

Kid now handed the microphone to Rex.

"Ahsoka is a great friend. Even though I have no clue why I was chosen to be on this show besides the fact that I'm a hopeless romantic, and I'm looking for a date. Other than that, I don't really know how to answer this…?" Rex handed the mic to Boba.

"My life has changed drastically! Now I don't wanna kill people just to kill them, I wanna kill the people who get in the way of the love between Ahsoka and I!" Boba proceeded to glare at every other contestant.

Lux, rolling his eyes inwardly, snatched the microphone from Boba. "I have made many realizations since I discovered my love for Ahsoka. One of them is that Separatists are stupid-"

"Well, no wonder you still are one, then," Ahsoka spoke up.

The audience gasped.

"_Anyway_," Lux said, glaring at Ahsoka for a moment. "Ahsoka is wonderful and I'm the only one who should truly be with her."

Bob took the microphone as Lux handed it to him. "I would argue that my life has changed the most since meeting Ahsoka. She's honestly all I can think about. She's changed the way I speak, if you recall, I used to talk with 'like' or 'totally' between practically every single word. Then I realized, Ahsoka deserved for me to speak better than that, so I began to speak normally. The feelings I have for Ahsoka are most certainly love, not something that seems fake and will fade away. And I love donuts. Yeah."

Anakin stared at him. The audience clapped a little. "Well! It's time for the judges to decide who gets eliminated from that round."

The judges began to speak amongst themselves once again, and in a minute or so, they had come up with a decision.

"The judges have made up their minds! Find out who will _not_ be the guy who gets to date the girl, right after the break!" Anakin exclaimed happily.

More commercials began to play.

"Agaaaaain with the commeeeerciaaaallsss," Barriss murmured, still eating her popcorn. "Can't they just pay the stupid advertising companies and leave the commercials off?"

Chuchi shook her head. "No. They can't do that, because if they did they would disappoint the two percent of the population which enjoys commercials."

"Oh."

In a few minutes, the show came back.

"Welcome back to 'Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl'!" Anakin said with a giant grin into the microphone. "The judges have made up their minds about who will get eliminated from this round. Take it away, Yoda!"

"Person who no get to date girl, is… Bane Cad! Suck, your story did. Idiot, you are." Yoda sat back down and threw the microphone at Bane's head.

"Ow. Whatever, this show is dumb anyway." Bane stole the microphone and ran away with the security guards chasing him.

"Well, luckily that wasn't our _only_ microphone!" Anakin declared, and a pile of microphones proceeded to fall from the ceiling in a pile next to him.

The audience laughed.

"ROUND 3!" the announcer's voice came even louder than last time.

"FREEEEEEDDD!" Obi-Wan screamed all the louder.

"Round 3," said Anakin, "is this- make up a love song, and sing it to Ahsoka!"

"Oh gosh…" Ahsoka mumbled.

"You have 5 minutes to think! Time starts now!" Anakin exclaimed.

The remaining six contestants began thinking and scribbling on paper the lyrics to the song they had to write.

When the very short 5 minutes were up, Grievous got to go first once again.

"I wish I would get to date you, I wish I would get to date you, I wish I would get to date you, and that you'd like me too!" he sang.

Two people in the audience clapped lightly while the rest remained silent.

"…Your turn, Kid," said Anakin.

Kid took the microphone and got an electric guitar. "YEAAAAAH I WANNA DATE AHSOKAAAA! SHE'S PRETTY MUCH THE MOST AWESOMEST PERSON EVAAAAHH! OH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAAAAHHH… WOOHOO!"

The audience clapped a little.

"Alright… you're up, Rex," said Anakin.

Rex was given the microphone. He sang, "I reeeeaaally wanna find a daaaaaate! I really really reaaaally want a giiiiiiirlfriieeeeennd; I really really really really really really really want a daaaaaate! So please be my date, oh pleeeeease!"

A couple more people clapped this time, but still not a lot.

"….Ok… Boba, go!" Anakin said.

Boba took the microphone and performed a very sorry attempt at rapping. "Hey Ahsoka, I wanna be your date, can't you see it's fate, c'mon let's not be late, I know your name's not Kate, and my name is not Nate, maybe if we wait, I could be your mate, I don't need no bait, or something in a crate, or something with the number 8, don't be one to rate, haters gonna hate."

Despite the fact that it was pretty ridiculous, the audience erupted in applause.

Ahsoka just face palmed yet again.

"That was totally AMAZING, Boba!" Anakin exclaimed. "You're next, Lux!"

Lux took the microphone. "You know you love me, I know you-"

Ahsoka got out of the chair she was sitting in, picked it up, and threw it at Lux.

Lux screamed and fell backwards into the stage, breaking the fake wall and getting tangled up in some wires.

"NEXT?" Ahsoka shouted, irritated. She took the chair back, returned it to its original place, and sat down again.

Anakin, along with the rest of the audience, was stunned into shock. "Yeah… next…!"

Bob took the microphone. He sang to some tune which he had made up. "Ever since I met you, my life has greatly changed. You're always on my mind, oh always on my mind…" He took out a small keyboard and began to play music along with his song. "Ahsoka, I love you, you're the love of my life; if I had a cupcake for every time I think of you, I would start a bakery; if I had a choice between a pile of gold and you, I would chose you, and then seek after the gold to make your life wonderful. You're always on my mind…" He proceeded to play a small tune on the keyboard, then continued singing. "If I could have one request granted in all the galaxy, it would be that you give me one chance…. I love you." He ended his song with a little more music on the keyboard.

Anakin had tears in his eyes. "Oh my gosh that was so sweet! I'M ALL EMOTIONAL NOW!" He grabbed a piece of bread, blew his nose in it, and set it aside to eat later.

Ahsoka face palmed yet again at Anakin, but she had to admit, Bob's song was pretty nice.

"Alright, judges!" Anakin exclaimed.

_4 more rounds, lots of crazy tests, lots of Ahsoka getting utterly mortified, and 3 more eliminations later…_

It was the end of the fifth round. Rex, Lux, and Bob were the only three who remained.

Padme stood and took the microphone as the commercial break ended. "This has been one of the hardest decisions of the night," she said, "but I'm sorry, Rex, you will not be the guy who gets to date the girl."

Rex burst out in tears. "I WAS SO CLOSE TO GETTING A GIRL!" he wailed, and he ran backstage crying.

Everyone stared at him.

"Well, that brings us to the final round," said Anakin.

"FINAL. ROUND," said the announcer, louder than all the previous rounds.

Obi-Wan _would have _screamed "FRED!" but he had lost his voice after all the other rounds of screaming.

"The final round will be an epic duel to see which of you is more macho and is more capable of defending Ahsoka in times of need," Anakin said dramatically.

"Dude, I can DEFEND MYSELF," Ahsoka shouted. "Can I just leave?"

"No! It's the final round!" Anakin shouted back. "DEPLOY SWORDS!"

Swords fell out of the sky and landed all over the ground.

Lux picked up a sword. "…How do you use this thing…" he murmured.

Bob picked one up as well. "Hey cool! It's just like a lightsaber!" He swung it at Lux.

Lux screamed and dropped his sword. He ran off stage, jumped into a lake, and found a seashell.

Everyone was silent for thirteen milliseconds.

"I guess that means Bob is the winner!" Anakin exclaimed.

The audience went wild, screaming and cheering and completely freaking out.

Anakin got off the little podium thing and walked over to Ahsoka, got her off the chair, and pulled her over to Bob. "Congratulations, Bob! You've won! This means you get to go on a series of seven dates with Ahsoka-"

"WHAT?" Ahsoka cried. "You said _ONE DATE_, not SEVEN!"

"Did I say that? Hm. Oh well!" Anakin said.

"I can't believe this is happening to me!" Ahsoka wailed miserably.

Bob put a hand on Ahsoka's shoulder. "Aw, come on, Ahsoka. It'll be fun!"

Ahsoka slapped his hand away. "Not. Likely," she said through gritted teeth, and left the stage quickly.

Bob was going to follow her, but Anakin made him stand on this very high thing in the middle of the stage while the audience continued to applaud madly and throw things at the stage like roses and metal coffee mugs.

"Ok, Bob," said Anakin, "so you've won and get to date the girl. Your next step now is finding her before she leaves the country to avoid you. Go go go!"

Bob nodded and ran off stage to find Ahsoka.

Anakin turned to the camera. "And that concludes this episode of 'Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl'! Tune in next week to see which guy gets to date Aayla Secura!"

Roll credits.

**Soooo, what'd ya think? Hm? Hm? :D Stay tuned for chapter 4, and REVIEW! 8D**


	4. Get a Life

**Hello all my lovely readers! :D For those of you who haven't checked yet, I have updated my Umbara parodies! The last one should be up very soon, but I just was itching to write this instead, so here you go!**

**This chapter is special because this day last year (March 14) was the day I published A Not-So-Normal Week 3, meaning that this is also Ahsoka's birthday! The first part of this chapter takes place the day before, and then after it says "the next day", it is her birthday, in case you are confused.**

**I forgot about the idea credit in the last chapter! I believe the ideas I used were from Liv and Driftstar- Leader of Treeclan. Sorry if I forgot anyone! D:**

**Driftstar (yes, I'm shortening your name, sorry! xD) asked "they got KICKED out by a GLOVE. is that possible?" answer: yes. it is. o3o**

**AaylaKit asked "1) Are you going to show the Aayla Secura bit, or was that part of the ending? 2) Why wasn't Luke there? Yes...people DO do this...I am thankfully not one of them. And 3) Are tomaotes a fruit?" answer: 1- I might, but not right away. 2- Because he hasn't been born yet :P 3- yes.**

**AaylaKit also mentioned "On an offhanded note, Chuchi's first name is Riyo." answer: Yes, I know, but I've come to be used to calling her Chuchi, so I tend to refer to her as that xD**

**AaylaKit ALSO asked "How did Anakin get to eat a sandwich if someone who may or may not be one of my 20,000,000 favorite bounty hunters stole it? Was it, like (oh no I sound like Bob!) a BREADLESS sandwich?" answer: Well, I don't know! Read on! xDDD**

**EDIT: typos have been fixed**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 4: Get a Life**

As soon as the game show ended, a girl from the audience got up from her seat and began to walk towards the backstage door. She passed by Obi-Wan, who was desperately attempting to communicate with Anakin, even though his voice was gone. He really wanted to meet "Fred", but had no way of voicing his request.

The girl snuck through the door and made her way through the maze of props, actors, actresses, set coordinators, acting agents, and everyone else who was scheduled to be on the set next.

Eventually, she spotted who she was looking for. Captain Rex.

Rex was sitting on a little crate in the far corner of the room, talking to Bane, who had finally given up the microphone as he got distracted by a neon yellow marker. Anyways, Rex was telling his life story to the cruel bounty hunter.

"It was my only chance for love!" Rex wailed, crying hysterically. "No one wants a guy like me."

"Just go get hired by a Sith and capture a lady. Works for me," Bane stated.

"What?"

Bane ignored him. "Anyways, I've got people to torture. Have fun, man." And he got up and left.

Rex was silent for a few seconds, and then started crying.

The girl walked over to him.

"I'll never find a girl!" Rex sobbed miserably.

The girl tapped him gently on the shoulder.

"Huh?" Rex said confusedly, and turned around to find her standing there.

"Hi… I saw you on the show earlier," she said to him.

Rex looked sad. "Yeah. I have no love life."

"I just wanted to say you're not alone," she said with a little laugh. "I mean, look at me. I'm 22 and only have ever been on one date…. But hey, you know, just be patient, because love will find you eventually." She smiled.

"You really think so?" Rex asked, thinking that maybe hope was not lost.

She nodded. "We've all got that one someone special out there waiting for us." She smiled again.

"But… what if this was my last hope?" he exclaimed, dreading the thought.

"I doubt it will be," she said. "After all, who finds someone really worth dating by 'winning' them on a game show?"

"What I'd like to know more is who told them I liked Ahsoka…" he said, an awkward expression coming over his face.

"Yeah, that part was a little strange…."

"Because I don't like her. Never have, and apparently now- never will," Rex said with a sigh.

"Like I said, wait, and love will come to you," she said with a smile.

"I guess," Rex replied, still looking a little sad.

"Don't worry."

"Ok," Rex said, sighing again.

The girl smiled again. "I'm Elice, by the way."

"I'm Captain Rex. Usually I tell people to call me 'captain' or 'sir', but you can just call me Rex," he said to her.

"Nice to meet you, Rex," Elice replied with smile.

"Nice to meet you, too," said Rex.

Elice folded her hands behind her back and looked down a little. "Well, I guess I should be getting home now…"

"Alright," Rex said quietly. "Thanks for coming to say hi."

"Any time," Elice replied, smiling again. "I've got a newly-opened shop on Aujourd'hui Street. It's next to a sandwich joint called 'We Sell Sandwiches'."

"I know where that is," Rex stated.

"Feel free to drop by anytime," she said.

"Thanks, I will," Rex said, smiling.

Elice smiled back. "Bye."

"Bye…"

She walked away through the back door.

…

Anakin was strolling back to his and Ahsoka's quarters cheerily. He approached the door, and spotted a very large box. There was a note on the box. He picked it up and read it. It said:

_Hey Anakin,_

_I know how much you like interesting pets. Found this one trying to catch the dancing squirrels which live on my roof. Trust me, not fun. Anywho, take care of her!_

_Signed,_

_Anonymous_

"Oh, that Anonymous! He's so awesome!" Anakin said, and opened the box.

Inside the box was a black wolf.

"EEEEEE! I'VE ALWAYS WANTED A FLUFFY PUPPY!" Anakin squealed.

The wolf yawned.

Anakin pet the wolf's ears. "Hi fluffy puppy!" he exclaimed.

The wolf looked up at him.

"You're sooooo cute and fluffy! I will love you forever and I won't let you die like Ahsoka the fishy!" He had tears of joy in his eyes.

The wolf's ears twitched a little.

"And I will name you Wendy!" Anakin cried excitedly.

He ran into the kitchen as the wolf blinked, and came back quickly with a sandwich that had unicorn jelly and tater tots in it. Turns out his bread had actually been hid in the cupboard under the sink by Ahsoka, who left a note that said "Haha, you suck." He shoved the sandwich in front of the wolf and waited.

The wolf just stared at it, then looked up at him as if to ask what to do.

"Eat it!" Anakin said excitedly.

The wolf just kept looking up at him.

"It's reaaalllllly good! Watch!" He took a giant bite out of the sandwich and grinned elatedly.

The wolf just yawned and lay down on the ground.

Anakin thought for a moment, and then gobbled up the rest of the sandwich. He watched as the wolf rolled onto her back. "Awww does my fluffy puppy want her tummy rubbed?"

The wolf just yawned.

Anakin rubbed her tummy. "I love you, fluffy puppy!" he exclaimed. The wolf thumped her tail in reply.

"Do you want to go to the unicorn field, kill the weaklings, and make lunch out of them?" Anakin asked excitedly with a crazy grin.

The wolf rolled back onto her stomach.

"C'mon, fluffy puppy!" He put a collar and a leash on her and started gently dragging her along. The wolf didn't move. "C'mon… fluffy… puppy…" he said in a strained voice as he continued to drag her along.

The wolf pulled back on the leash, yanking him onto his back.

"Ow!" Anakin cried.

Going over to him, the wolf looked down at him.

"Bad fluffy puppy," said Anakin. "No pull Anakin down."

The wolf licked his nose.

"D'ya wanna play, fluffy puppy?" Anakin exclaimed, getting up. As the wolf looked at him, he picked up a rubber duck and threw it. "Fetch, fluffy puppy!"

The duck broke the window.

Anakin stared at the window in shock. "Oh noes, I broked da window."

Yoda popped out of the air vent. "CORNDOGS! CALL FOR MASTER WINDOW, YOU DID! NOT HERE, HE IS! HEHEHE!" He spotted the wolf, and hopped over to her. "Ooooooh, fluffy puppy I didn't know you had, Skywalker!"

"Isn't she the cutest thing?" Anakin exclaimed.

The wolf looked eye-to-eye with Yoda, and nudged him a little, pushing him back.

Yoda stared at her with his giant eyes all sparkly. "Name fluffy puppy, what did you?"

"Wendy!" Anakin declared proudly.

Yoda frowned. "Dumb name, that is. Change it, you must."

The wolf nudged him again, trying to figure out what he is.

Yoda smiled elatedly for a moment, and then went back to frowning. "More creative you must be, Skywalker. Pathetic, you are sometimes."

Anakin sniffed and got tears in his eyes.

"Better name, you must pick," said Yoda.

"Like what?" Anakin asked, his face still sad.

"Like… CORNDOG!" Yoda screamed.

Anakin looked over into the kitchen, and the first thing he saw was a box of cherry flavored car wax. "CHERRY!"

"Not as good as corndogs, cherries are," Yoda mumbled to himself.

"Her name is Cherry," Anakin said as he watched the wolf sit down. "Corndogs aren't good anyways. Tater tots are." He pursed his lips.

Yoda burst out in tears. "INSULTED ME YOU HAVE!"

Anakin just ignored him and continued to play with the wolf.

…

Bob had since the end of the show found Ahsoka, and was now dragging her along through town looking for something to do for their date.

"C'mon!" Bob exclaimed as he dragged her along by her arm.

"Whatever," Ahsoka, who was on HeadNovel on her phone, murmured.

Suddenly, someone ran around the corner and crashed straight into Bob.

"Hey! What was that for?" Bob exclaimed.

Ahsoka looked shocked and confused.

"Sorry, sorry," said the man who had crashed into Bob as he dusted fake sugar off his clothing. "Not much time for planning when you're running from daleks, and that's 'dah-leks' like 'dog' or 'yah', and not 'day-leks', which some of the people tend to think…. Interesting world you got here, by the way. We like it very much, don't we, Lily?" He looked to the owl sitting on his shoulder.

"Hoo!" the owl, supposedly named Lily, replied.

Bob raised an eyebrow slightly. "Ah… and you are…?"

"I'm the Doctor, pleasure to meet you," he said.

Ahsoka was still confused. "Doctor… who?"

"No, just the Doctor (the Tenth, to be exact). Although Lily seems to prefer to call me Doctor 'Hoo'."

"Hoo."

The Doctor continued, "Lily's my assistant, you see. You know when I first met her I thought of calling her something, like Rose. Such a pretty name, Rose, but a bit too overused, if you know just quite what I mean. So I thought, name her after some other flower! And Lily worked quite nicely. Shame, though.….. I never can seem to keep one assistant for more than one season…"

"I see…" Bob said, trying to understand. "Well, _I'm_ taking my lovely new girlfriend on a date," he said with a grin.

"I am _not_ your girlfriend! I'm only dating you because I have to!" Ahsoka protested as she tried to get her arm out of Bob's grasp.

Bob ignored her. "So, Doctor, would you happen to know anywhere where Ahsoka and I may have a wonderful date together?"

"I bet I can find a nice restaurant for you two to spend a lovely evening at," said the Doctor. "You see I recently got a new app for my sonic screwdriver. It used to just do the old things, but now, I can get new apps for it! Imagine that. And," he paused to pull out his sonic screwdriver, "my most recent app will search and find the nearest best restaurant. Brilliant, really."

"Hoo," said Lily.

"Oooh! Cool!" Bob exclaimed.

The Doctor began to use the screwdriver to search for a restaurant, when suddenly, several daleks made their way around the corner of a building and began to approach them, shouting things about 'extermination'.

"WHAT ARE THOSE?" Bob shouted.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes and continued playing Chicken Farm Village.

"Daleks, just back away slowly," said the Doctor.

They all began to back away. Bob slipped on a banana peel, letting go of Ahsoka.

"Finally," she mumbled.

"We will exterminate all the termites in the vicinity of this area," said one of the daleks.

The Doctor pointed his screwdriver at the daleks.

Then suddenly, R2-D2 came rolling along cheerily, whistling a tune to himself. He spotted the daleks and gave a little shrill chirp.

One of the daleks approached him slowly.

R2 whistled.

The dalek observed him for a moment, and then, " *insert heart shape here* "

More of the daleks rolled up to R2 and stared at him with hearts.

R2 spun around and chirped excitedly, enjoying the company.

"R2 has saved us!" Bob cried.

"Well, now that he has it under control, Lily and I best be going. The daleks will follow if they see me leave. So, on we go to the TARDIS," said the Doctor.

"But we haven't found a restaurant yet!" Bob said.

"I'm sure that such a capable young man as yourself will be able to find a suitable place for your date. I'd love to stay on your lovely planet, but I'm afraid we can't," the Doctor replied.

Barriss suddenly ran up to them, having been looking for Ahsoka ever since the game show ended. She spotted the Doctor. "OH MY GOSH! THE DOCTOR!" she screamed at the top of her lungs.

"You watch _way _too much TV, Barriss," Ahsoka said to her.

"So apparently I've been noticed on this planet!" said the Doctor. "Fancy that. Well, hate to run off but you know, being a timelord and everything... but then shouldn't I have plenty of time if I can time travel? Oh well." He ran off with Lily.

"NO DON'T LEAVE!" Barriss shouted.

"Get a life, Barriss," Ahsoka said to her.

Barriss pouted and walked away.

Bob watched as everyone else left. "Now, on to our date!"

…

_The next morning…_

"Happy birthday, Ahsoka!" Anakin screamed as loud as he possibly could in Ahsoka's face as she was still asleep the next morning.

Ahsoka jumped out of bed, kicked him in the face, whacked him on the head with her desk lamp, and stared at him, panting. "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"

Anakin's face twitched at the pain. "I said happy birthday! Y u kick me?" He started crying.

"Oh, is that what you said? Sorry!" Ahsoka looked at him sympathetically.

Anakin looked around him, as if trying to find something. "Cherry! Where did you go?"

Cherry trotted into the room, wearing a birthday hat on her head and a pink scarf around her neck- both of which Anakin had put on her. She looked like she was irritated by it, but Anakin took no notice.

"Yay, there you are, Cherry! Oh, Snippies, I got you a present you wanna come see it? Huh? Huh?" Anakin said excitedly.

Ahsoka yawned. "Sure."

Anakin dragged her out of her bedroom and brought her to the living room where there was a large fish tank mounted to the wall, and swimming in it was a squid which measured about four inches. "This is Tommy! I got him for your birthday present!" He smiled broadly, very proud of being able to keep the squid alive for three hours.

Looking at Tommy, Ahsoka made a face a little. "I'm not the hugest fan of squids," she said, "but thanks…"

"I am the HUGESTEST fan of squids! Haven't you seen my squid dollies?" Anakin asked.

"Yes, they're all over your floor," Ahsoka replied with a roll of her eyes.

"Well ya know if you don't want Tommy I will have him for you!" Anakin squealed, honestly hoping that Ahsoka would say she _didn't_ want the squid.

"You can have him if you want, sure," Ahsoka said.

"YIPPEE! THANK YOU SNIPPIES!" Anakin screamed, hugging her really tightly. "So, whaddya wanna do for your birthday?"

"Hm… anything as long as it doesn't involve unicorns, game shows, Bob -or any of the other guys that were on the show for that matter-, or more squids, it doesn't really matter," Ahsoka said.

"We could go to the purple chicken museum!" Anakin suggested.

"The… what…?"

"The purple chicken museum!" Anakin repeated and turned to Cherry. "You want to go to the purple chicken museum, right, Cherry!"

Cherry snorted a little and shook her head, trying to get the hat and scarf off.

Ahsoka removed the hat and scarf from the wolf and patted her head. "Where did you get this wolf anyway, Skyguy?"

"Anonymous gave it to me," Anakin replied.

"Oh. Ok."

"Let's go to the Happy Emu and get ice cream for breakfast!" Anakin exclaimed.

Ahsoka thought for a moment. "Y'know, that actually sounds really good," she said with a laugh.

"Yay! Can we go in our pajamas?" Anakin asked.

Ahsoka shrugged. "Why not?"

"Yay, yay, yay! C'mon, Cherry!" Anakin marched out the door. Cherry followed him.

Ahsoka laughed again and followed them both.

Obi-Wan spotted them as they were walking towards the speeder. "OH MY! A pajama parade? Why was I not invited?" he asked sadly.

"You can come!" Anakin exclaimed. "We're going to the Happy Emu!"

"Ooooh yippee!" Obi-Wan put on his fluffy bunny slippers and marched after them.

The four of them eventually marched all the way to the Happy Emu. It was pretty close, so it didn't take them long.

The person at the counter stared at the three strange pajama-clad figures and black wolf that marched delightedly into the ice cream parlor.

Anakin went straight up to the counter. "One straight up bowl of enchanted unicorn sorbet, please!" he said proudly. He tossed a couple of Republic credits onto the counter.

The counter worker continued to stare at him and inputted his order into the computer where it went to the workers over by the ice cream stations.

"And for Cherry," he looked down at the wolf who still stood next to him. "Well, I think this is disgusting, but she likes raw meat! Do you have any meat ice cream?"

Ignoring the pajamas, the worker was happy to discuss something he knew- ice cream. "Yes, we just got in a shipment of raw steak granita."

"Alright! One bowl of that!" Anakin said.

The worker gave him a number, and Anakin went to the table by the window which they always sat at. Anakin knew it was their table because it still had the blueberry gum on the underside of the table that he had stuck there the first time they came.

Ahsoka went up to the counter next. "I'll have a sundae with pickle ice cream, peanut butter ice cream, coffee syrup, scrambled eggs, and pistachios."

The worker inputted her order as well and accepted the credits as she gave them.

Obi-Wan watched Ahsoka take her number and walk to the table Anakin was sitting at. "Hello, store worker! Jolly rancher day!"

The worker's eye twitched. "Welcome to the Happy Emu…"

"I'll have a quart sized bucket of sand and cactus desert dessert with chocolate lima bean ice cream, rainbow sprinkles, shredded moon cheese, crushed candy cane, and three squirts of hot pepper sauce," Obi-Wan said with the most serious face in the world. "And can I get one of those pretty long spoons with the funny jokes on the underside like a popsicle stick?"

"Yeah, sure." The worker inputted everything Obi-Wan wanted, remembering every single topping, and told him the price.

Obi-Wan took out his little lace coin purse and gave the man the credits. "Here you go, Mr. Steve."

"My name's Phil. Good day, sir." He handed Obi-Wan a number and went to the back room since there was no one else in line.

Obi-Wan looked at his lovely number, which was ninety-two, and went to sit down with Anakin and Ahsoka.

Anakin was trying to get Cherry to sit next to him, but the wolf didn't want to sit on a chair, and ignored him, thumping her tail from where she sat on the ground.

Then, all of a sudden… the lights in the ice cream parlor dimmed, and colored spotlights came on, flashing towards the side of the room which was up on a slightly raised platform.

A voice came from the speaker. "And _now_… all the way from somewhere else in the galaxy… we have a special birthday message for none other than Ahsoka Tano!"

Ahsoka glanced over at the platform, raising an eyebrow.

Anakin watched excitedly, wondering what was going to happen.

Obi-Wan's jaw dropped and he stared at the shiny lights.

"Please welcome…. LUX BONTERI!"

Ahsoka slammed her forehead onto the table. "NOT AGAIN!"

**Oh no, Lux is back! XD**

**I can't remember all the ideas which were used, but thanks to Liv for helping me write pretty much the first 2 thirds of this chapter, and shout out to TARDISjedigirl for requesting the Doctor's cameo!**

**Stay tuned! I'll try and write my parts for Emblem Star and update that before I update NSNW4 again xD**


	5. Pardon Me, Madam

**This has taken so long! Oh my gosh! I've been so busy. Actually, I've been tired, so when I should be writing, I'm staring at the computer screen doing nothing. xD But alas! I have completed it. Now, if only I could actually figure out what to write for Emblem Star (and I deeply apologize for my pathetic procrastination. ^^; )**

**Reader 88 asked: "Aujourd'hui is Today in French, right, or was it german? A little help?" Answer: Why yes, it is "today" in French. Because you can by anything and everything, any time you want on that street! But whenever you buy it, it will always be today! ;D**

**Aay Kaim said "Aaylakit had a good point! The Doctor can bring Luke in the TARDIS to the game show!" Ahahaha, no. xDD**

**Aaaaaand that concludes ze questionz! No, I am not attempting a lame French accent, why do you ask? :P**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 5: Pardon Me, Madam**

Lux appeared on stage and was about to say something, but suddenly Cherry jumped up and ran towards Lux, snarling and growling at him. He started screaming and ran away from the wolf, and she chased after him. The two ran all around the ice cream parlor.

Anakin nearly choked on his ice cream and got up and ran after Cherry.

Cherry caught up to Lux and jumped on him, knocking him onto the ground.

"Please let me go! Please!" Lux cried.

Finally catching up to them, Anakin skidded to a halt, leaning his hands on his knees to catch his breath. "Bad Cherry! No, no! You don't chase random strangers around an ice cream shop!"

Lux was completely terrified and staring at Cherry, looking like he was going to pass out.

Cherry snarled at him.

Anakin suddenly perked up. "Awwww, she likes you, Lux! Listen to her!"

Cherry growled at Lux even more fiercely.

Lux screamed.

"See, she's showing you how much she loves you!" Anakin petted Cherry's head. "Have fun playing!" He walked back to the table to finish his ice cream.

"NOOOO!" Lux shrieked, completely terrified to be left alone with Cherry.

Anakin sat back down and shoved a big spoonful of ice cream into his mouth. "It will be so nice for Cherry to have a playmate!"

"…Playmate?" Ahsoka asked, looking back at where Cherry was still on top of Lux, staring down at him and growling in his face. She rolled her eyes and went back to eating her ice cream.

Obi-Wan was trying to eat his ice cream out of the giant bucket with the tiny spoon that had jokes on the back. "Listen to this one, guys! What did the rock say to the other rock?"

Ahsoka thought for a moment, plucking off one of the pieces of scrambled egg from her ice cream and eating it. "I don't know."

Obi-Wan looked to Anakin for an answer.

But Anakin, however, was distracted by the fact that the shovel they had given him to eat his ice cream was too small, so he threw it and shoved his face into the bowl, licking the ice cream and getting it all over his face.

"Anakiiiiin," Obi-Wan said, flicking a rainbow sprinkle at Anakin.

Anakin still had his face in the bowl. "Nh?" He pulled the bowl off and tried to lick ice cream off his nose. "Did'ya say something, Kenob's?"

"Yes. What did the rock say to the other rock?"

"Oh." Anakin scraped ice cream out of the bowl with his finger and licked it off. "Hm, I think he said, 'you rock'!" He started laughing.

Obi-Wan giggled. "Nope! The answer is, 'nothing, rocks don't talk'!"

Anakin made a face. "That's a pretty lame punch line." He stuck his face in the bowl again and continued to eat the ice cream.

"Why do they call it a punch line anyway?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Maybe you're supposed to punch a line," Ahsoka suggested.

"Which line?" Obi-Wan looked around to try and find a line. He looked at Ahsoka. "Hey, you've got lines on your face! Can I punch you?"

"What?" Ahsoka cried. "No! You can't punch me."

"Please?" Obi-Wan looked at her sadly, his eyes all sparkly.

"…. Are you going to do it hard?" she asked.

"Of course not!" He smiled as much as he could to reassure her.

Ahsoka was silent for another moment. "Fine, but you can only punch my-"

"YAY!" Obi-Wan punched her in the face, accidentally as hard as he could.

Ahsoka didn't even have time to react, and fell out of the chair, unconscious.

Anakin dropped his bowl of ice cream. He had ice cream all over his face, hands, and clothes. "AHSOKA!" he screamed.

Lux, still completely terrified by Cherry, noticed too. "Ahsoka!" He looked at Cherry. "Nice kitty… let me go…."

Cherry growled fiercely again.

Lux made a high-pitched yelp of fear. "Ok, ok!"

Anakin grabbed Ahsoka's shoulders and shook her, getting ice cream on her. "WAKE UP SNIPS! I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU! OR PADME! OR CHERRY! OR UNICORN SUNDAES WITH TATER TOT JAM!" he wailed and started crying.

Ahsoka woke up and blinked slowly a couple times, staring at Anakin and trying to figure out why he was shouting about tater tot jam. Then she looked at Obi-Wan, who was staring at her in shock like he had just watched someone fall off a cliff into a pit of angry dolphins. That's when it came back to her. "I SAID NOT TO DO IT HARD, OBI-WAN!"

Obi-Wan sniffed. "I'm sorry, Ahsoka! I forgot that I slept with my super strong epic metal gloves last night and didn't take them off! I'm training to be a superhero, you know."

Ahsoka rolled her eyes and then looked at Anakin. "Let go of me, I'm alive."

Anakin opened his tightly closed eyes and stopped crying. "SNIPPIES!"

"Yeah whatever let me go."

Anakin hugged her, transferring more of the ice cream that was on him onto her clothing.

"Ewww! Anakin! What have I told you about eating like a deranged pig?" Ahsoka exclaimed.

Anakin sat back down and pursed his lips. "I am not a deranged pig, I am a unicorn." He stuck his face in the bowl again and began to lick out the sticky liquid which was all that was left of the ice cream.

Ahsoka face palmed yet again and proceeded to continue eating her ice cream. She got out her phone and started checking HeadNovel, liking every single post in which her cyber-stalkers said happy birthday to her.

Obi-Wan got up from his chair, taking his bucket of ice cream with him, and went over to Lux. "Hello, Mr. Lux! I am too full to eat the rest of my ice cream, so I would like to kindly give the rest to you!"

Lux was too terrified by Cherry to answer him.

Obi-Wan took his silence as a lovely answer of "yes, I would love your ice cream," and tipped the bowl of ice cream upside down.

Lux screamed as loud as he could as a giant pile of chocolate lima bean ice cream, rainbow sprinkles, shredded moon cheese, crushed candy cane, and three squirts of hot pepper sauce cascaded out of the bucket towards his face.

Cherry hopped off him and out of the way to not get covered in ice cream.

Obi-Wan grinned cheerfully and looked down at Lux.

Lux yelled and screamed from under the pile of ice cream because the hot pepper sauce was burning his eyes. He jumped up and tried to run out of the store, crashing into three tables, four walls, nine employees, and a bowl of soup before finally making it out the door. Then, he crashed into a telephone pole, fell into a puddle of mud, and passed out.

Everyone in the store stared out the window at Lux, and in about two seconds, everyone went back to their own business and forgot it ever happened.

Anakin had finally managed to lick all the ice cream out of his bowl, and stuck the bowl on his head. "It's a souvenir hat!" he declared.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes. "Whatever." She took her empty paper bowl and threw it away in the trashcan.

Cherry trotted back over to the table and looked up at Anakin.

Obi-Wan put the now-empty bucket on his head, following Anakin's example. "Whoa! Everyone should do this! It's awesome!" He began strolling away pleasantly with the bucket on his head, and crashed into the door. "Pardon me, Madam," he said courteously, and began trying to push open the door. He pushed, and pushed, and pushed, but the door would not open. "PHILLY! YOUR DOOR IS STUCK!"

Phil rolled his eyes. "The name's _Phil _not _Philly _and it's a pull door."

Obi-Wan froze for a moment, and his hand slid down to the handle, where he pulled it open with little effort. "Well, I'm off! Happy birthday again, Ahsoka, and thanks for letting me join you on the pajama parade!" He strolled away again, crashing into the same telephone pole as Lux. "Pardon me, Madam."

Ahsoka stared at him as he left.

Anakin's lip quivered and he removed the ice cream bowl from his head and stared at it solemnly. "I want a bucket on my head…"

"Find something more useful to do," Ahsoka said to him. She went into Chicken Farm Village on her phone and harvested her cupcake plants.

Ignoring Ahsoka, Anakin went to the counter. "Give me one of those buckets!"

Ahsoka heard him from the table and face palmed for what seemed like the one hundredth time that day. "Master! Manners!" she shouted.

Anakin shrank back a little in the direction away from Ahsoka. He turned back to Phil. "May I pretty please have one of those really nice buckets?"

"Yeah whatever. Here." Phil grabbed a bucket and gave it to Anakin.

Anakin gasped in complete amazement and squealed elatedly. He flipped over the bucket and stuck it onto his head. "Yippee!" He danced around with the bucket on his head.

Cherry stared at him in confusion.

"Ready to go, Snips?" said Anakin's muffled voice from inside the bucket.

Ahsoka was still playing HeadNovel on her phone. "What?"

"Are you ready to go?" Anakin repeated.

"Oh, yeah." Ahsoka got up from the table and left with Anakin, jerking him out of the way every time he almost crashed into a person or a pole. Cherry followed.

They continued to walk back to the Jedi Temple. "Oh, Snippies! I forgot to ask you how your date was last night!" Anakin said.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes. "Thanks for reminding me," she mumbled. "It was ok, I guess. All he did was talk the whole time. But I wasn't listening."

"Sounds like my first date with Padme!" Anakin exclaimed dreamily.

Ahsoka stared at him, of course not being able to see his face because of the bucket on his head.

The three of them approached the Jedi Temple, when suddenly, they were surrounded by a mob of pirates.

"Arrrg! Maties! We be the pirates who pillage the seven systems in search of the best cheesy romantic comedies!" exclaimed the pirate who appeared to be the captain, who was standing atop the giant pirate ship which was sitting less than ten feet away. Twenty or so pirates were pushing the boat along- as it was on wheels.

The pirate captain grabbed hold of the rope, and began to swing to the ground, but the rope snapped and he fell the rest of the way, crashing to the ground right in front of Anakin, Ahsoka, and Cherry.

Anakin could not see anything out of his bucket and had no idea what was going on. "Did someone die?"

Ahsoka was silent.

The pirate captain stood up. He appeared to be Nautolan, like Kit, but he was purple, and of course wearing a pirate outfit. He brushed himself off. "Now, which of ye fine maties will escort us to the nearest theater? Or will we have to use force?" He pulled out a cardboard tube which he had obtained from the end of a paper towel roll.

"Who exactly are you?" Ahsoka asked.

"Oh, where are my manners? HEY! SOMEONE MAKE A NOTE OF BEING MORE POLITE!" Shouted the captain. One of the pirates grabbed out a little notebook and began scribbling the captain's request in it. "My name's Flint. I'm Kit Fisto's cousin, and I'm a pirate."

"You know Kit?" Anakin asked excitedly. He took off the bucket. He gasped. "Flint! It is you!"

"Anakin!" Flint exclaimed.

"…You two know each other?" Ahsoka asked.

"Of course we do! Kit introduced us at the idiot's convention!" Anakin replied.

"Hey, you know, we could really use you on the pirate force! You wanna join?" Flint asked Anakin.

"YES I DO!" Anakin shrieked excitedly. He turned to Ahsoka. "Please take Cherry and my lovely bucket back to our quarters, ok?"

Ahsoka took the bucket from him. "Sure. See you later!" She left with Cherry… and the bucket.

Anakin went with Flint aboard the giant ship. Flint then realized Anakin was wearing his pajamas. "You Jedi certainly have the strangest attire…"

"These are my favoritest pajamas," said Anakin.

"Oh. Well, you're going to need to dress like a pirate to be on the S.S. Cheesy. That's the name of my ship!" Flint said, and dug through a chest of clothing. There were a ton of costumes. "Which one do you want, matie?"

Anakin stared into the box. "I want THAT one." He pointed to a neon orange pirate costume.

"Ok!" Flint exclaimed, and grabbed the costume out. "Go put it on."

Anakin took the costume excitedly and ran into the other room to change.

Flint got himself a glass of peach lemonade with a cheese stick in it while waiting for Anakin and sat on the edge of the ship.

"I'M ALL DRESSED!" Anakin screamed, appearing right behind Flint.

Flint screamed and fell off the side of the boat. A couple pirates noticed him and tried to catch him with a tiny trampoline, but they were way off, and Flint crashed onto the ground. "Ow." He tossed away his glass of lemonade and climbed back up on the ship. "Arrgg maty! You look fabulous! Now, I want you to bring me somewhere where we can find some cheesy romantic comedies."

Anakin was staring at his clothing. "Did you say something?"

"Yes. Where are the romantic comedies?" Flint asked.

"Ohhh! The comedies! Well, there's only one place to go for that," Anakin said.

"Take me there!" Flint demanded.

"Ok!" Anakin took his own cardboard tube and pointed it into the air. "To Obi-Wan's quarters!"

…

Obi-Wan was sitting on his couch watching TV, still wearing the bucket on his head. Of course he couldn't see the TV, but he had always wondered how headless people had to watch TV. And besides, he had seen this episode four hundred and sixty-two times. He always liked to watch it with Spanish subtitles so he could learn how to act out the episode in Spanish to his half-Polish step-cousin's pet Australian polar bear.

_KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK_

Obi-Wan looked at the door (er, where he knew the door _was_) and walked towards it. He crashed into his own front door. "Pardon me, Madam." He opened the door. "Hello?"

"Arrrrrggg!" Anakin declared in his most pirate-y voice. "We arrrr looking for cheesy romantic comedies! D'ya got any, huh Kenob's?"

"Ooooh! That sounds lovely! I'm watching a chick flick right now," Obi-Wan replied.

"Obi-Wan!" Anakin exclaimed, staring at him like he had done something terrible.

"What?" Obi-Wan asked timidly.

"Flicking chicks is mean!" Anakin cried.

"I'm sorry!" Obi-Wan said, cowering back meekly.

"I thought you'd changed," Anakin said dramatically.

Flint cleared his throat. "Umm… argg, we be here to find the cheesy romantic comedies, right matie?"

"Oh, yes!" Anakin said, becoming happy again. "I mean, arg!"

"It's aye," Flint corrected him.

"Oh, ok. Aye!" Anakin declared.

"Right this way!" Obi-Wan said. He turned on his heels and walked back towards the couch. He crashed into a lamp. "Pardon me, Madam." He went to the giant case of DVDs on the wall and began digging through them relentlessly, not looking for anything in particular because he couldn't see.

Flint approached the pile of cases that was growing on the ground. He picked one up and gasped. "A treasure among us pirates…"

"What's it called?" Anakin asked.

Flint was about to tell him, but suddenly-

"I saw a ship outside this lovely building, does anyone know where I can get one like it?" Another pirate who was not part of Flint's crew strolled into the room. "I'm always misplacing the Black Pearl…"

"And who might you be… matie?" Flint asked, walking over to him and forgetting about the DVD.

"I'm Captain Jack Sparrow," he replied.

"Like Captain Rex!" Anakin exclaimed excitedly.

"Never heard of 'em."

Obi-Wan walked over and crashed into Jack. "Pardon me, Madam."

Jack frowned and looked at him. "Do I _look_ like a 'madam', mate?"

Obi-Wan tipped his bucket and looked at Jack. "Hello Jack Sparrow I am Obi-Wan and I like candy and pie!"

"There should be a 'captain' in there somewhere," Jack reminded him.

"Oh sorry, Mr. Captain!" Obi-Wan corrected himself.

"Good enough…" Jack mumbled.

"I'm Flint," Flint said to him. He grinned not-so-piratey-like and held up his cardboard tube.

Anakin hit Flint with his own cardboard tube.

"Ow!" Flint hit Anakin back.

Soon the two were whacking each other mercilessly with the cardboard tubes. Obi-Wan timidly put the bucket back down to cover his eyes from the violence. Jack ate some peanuts while watching.

Then suddenly rabid camels ran through the room, ate all the furniture, and left the room completely bare with nothing but wooden floors and metal walls.

"What was that?" Obi-Wan asked, not taking the bucket off his head.

Anakin was staring at what was left of Obi-Wan's quarters with huge eyes. "It was the evil camel fairies," he murmured, sounding terrified.

Obi-Wan took the bucket off his head and stared at the walls in shock. Then he fainted and fell flat on his face.

"Weeeeell, not that this hasn't been fun, but I'm getting out of here. Oh and I'm gonna borrow your ship, mate. I'll bring it back. Maybe." Jack left the quarters, took Flint's ship, and drove away (since there was no water and the ship doesn't actually float).

Flint stared in horror. "My ship! It's gone! And look, my crew is following him! I've been shamed in the ways of piracy!"

"Aren't pirates supposed to steal stuff?" Obi-Wan asked, seeming to have woken up though he was still flat on his face.

"They are? That doesn't sound very fun," Flint remarked. He sat on the ground and tapped the wooden floors with his cardboard tube.

The rabid camels ran back the other way, stole Flint's cardboard tube and hat, and ran away screaming.

Flint gasped. "My only self defense!"

"You can have mine," Anakin said. "I prefer unicorn pretzels anyway." He handed Flint the now-half-eaten cardboard tube.

"Thanks," Flint mumbled.

…

"You know what _I_ really want right now?" Fives asked Rex, Jesse, Cody, and a couple other clones who he was with.

"I don't know, what _do _you really want right now?" Jesse asked.

"PURPLE YOGURT!" Fives exclaimed.

"I love purple yogurt!" Cody squealed.

Soon the whole room was full of cheers and remarks about how much they all loved purple yogurt. Rex stood on the table. "Men, brothers, I think it is far time that we stand up for this need, and seek out purple yogurt for ourselves!"

"Yeah!" they all shouted in unison.

"ONWARD!" Rex declared loudly, and they all marched out of the room.

_Twenty minutes later…_

The clones stood in front of Mace's quarters with picketing signs which were scrawled with purple markers in various messages such as "We want yogurt!" "Purple Yogurt rules!" "Give us yogurt now!" and "Save the kittens!"

Rex knocked daintily on the door.

Mace opened it. "Oh Aayla my dream has finally come true you have come… for… me…?" He soon realized it wasn't Aayla, but a group of fifty or so clones with signs.

"WE DEMAND PURPLE YOGURT!" they all shouted.

"Save the kittens!" one clone way in the back squeaked quietly.

"Purple… yogurt?" Mace asked in confusion.

"Yes, purple yogurt," Rex said, holding up a sign with a crudely drawn image of a little purple yogurt container.

"Ooooh!" Mace squealed. "You mean curdled grape nail polish! I took it from Shaak Ti, she's my neighbor you know! Don't tell her! I don't use it for what it's supposed to be for, that'd just be weird, but I do looove to paint my walls with it!" He gestured to the walls in his quarters, which were littered with messages to Aayla, hearts, cupid arrows, and imaginary love letters.

Rex looked at the wall, then back at the sign, confused.

"Sometimes I put it in my cereal! It gets all clumpy though so I decided to start saving it so I can watch it get hair!" He grinned elatedly, then ran into the kitchen and came back with a large bowl of clumpy, milk-and-cereal-covered nail polish bits covered in blue mold. "Its hair is so nice."

"That is not purple yogurt! We demand purple yogurt!" Rex exclaimed.

"PURPLE YOGURT!" the rest of the group shouted in echo to him.

Mace frowned. "If you do not want my lovely blue hair covered nail polish, that is fine. I will go eat it myself. Goodbye." He slammed the door.

But the clones didn't leave. They continued to protest and demand purple yogurt, while Mace ignored them best he could.

…

Darth Maul was at the mall. He went on the elevator and went to the second floor, walking along looking at the stores and receiving screams from pretty much everyone besides the tough guys who think they're cool.

Soon, he noticed a stand with several girl scouts selling cookies. He walked over to them. "I'd like two hundred and thirty boxes of everything," he said to them.

"Sorry, we don't have that much," the little six-year-old girl scout replied. The group leader that was supposed to be supervising the sales was too busy looking at something on their phone.

Maul frowned. "But I want that much. Gimme."

"But we don't _have_ that much," the girl repeated.

Maul was frustrated. "Just give me one of each then," he said, defeated by the six-year-old.

Then a lizard walked by and said, "You know, you could be saving pretty much nothing on your speeder insurance if you people just leave me alone. AND I'M A GECKO."

Maul watched him walk away.

The little girl gave Maul a box of each kind of cookie. "That will be twelve republic credits, sir."

"What? What makes you think I got money," Maul muttered irritably.

"Because you're trying to buy something. Duh," she girl replied, looking up at him.

"Fine," Maul mumbled with a groan and tossed the girl some credits. He stayed standing by the table and opened a box of cookies. He stuffed a few of them in his mouth and chewed them. "Mh, thes ar gweat," he said with his mouth completely full.

"You're not very polite, sir," said the girl.

"Yeah well neither are you." Maul ate the rest of the cookies. "Those were amazing! I wanna become a girl scout."

The girl looked at him like he was insane, because he was. "You can't be a girl scout."

"Who says I can't?" Maul challenged, going right up to her face.

"Because one: you're not a girl, and two: you're old," she stated.

"So? This is a free planet. Even if I'm not on the side of the government. But who cares about politics?" Maul opened the next box of cookies and started eating them.

The girl just stared at him, frowning.

"Now how do I become a girl scout?" Maul asked again.

"I said you can't," the girl repeated.

Maul frowned again, determined. "I will become a girl scout, and I will have revenge on Kenobi." He walked away with the rest of his cookies.

Going to his dark lair of darkness, where he had posters of Obi-Wan all over the wall with darts through them, and put together a large paper doll that looked like a girl.

"This will certainly work…" he said. "Soon, I will have all the cookies I could ever dream of." And an evil smile set across his face.

**I had to add Maul, I just had to xDDDDDDD Hopefully expect an Emblem Star update sometime this week. Hey I know, tell Liv to yell at me, that always works. And makes me cower in fear. Just kidding xDDD**


	6. I Have Named Him Machine of Awesomeness

**I'm sorry this took me so long! I _thought_ I could work on Emblem Star and NSNW4 over spring break, but it turns out I was almost more busy than when I had school! The next chapter of Emblem Star is almost complete, I am genuinely sorry that it is not up already! This chapter would've been up a day or 2 sooner, but my computer had some problems loading the site, and Liv wanted to read it before I published it. xD**

**Driftstar asked "So, if HeadNovel is Facebook, is Chicken Farm Village Farm Story?" Answer: Chicken Farm Village is Farmville.**

**Reader 88 Ahsokalover asked "Could you please kill Ahsoka in a chapter?" Answer: ... o.O**

**Pergjithshme asked "BTW, what WAS the movie? Was it a POTC?" Answer: The world may never know. ;)**

**SnipsSkywalker asked "Will pickles ever make a cameo?" Answer: Yes, I have just forgotten about them. Mental note!**

**.everything asked "when you write "rock" you mean those stonethings, or? (it's a serious question) what are candy corns? (describe them if you can)" Answer: Sometimes when I use rock as a noun, it is a literal rock, but the other half of the time (when used as a verb) it is meant as "awesome" or "cool" in a sense. So instead of "this is awesome!" I may say "this rocks!". Candy corns are little corn-kernel-shaped candies that generally are out in the autumn, but it's not uncommon to find them year-round. They're mostly pure sugar with some coloring added, and have a slight vanilla taste. I've made them myself, so I know they're made of corn syrup, confectioners sugar, powdered milk, butter, vanilla, and coloring (I may be forgetting something.) Hope this helps! :D**

**Alrighty, I think that's it! On to the chapter!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 6: I Have Named Him- Machine of Awesomeness**

Maul went back to the mall carrying his paper doll on marionette strings. He walked straight up to the girl scout table. "Hello again. This is my daughter… uh… Lindy. Lindy would like to become a girl scout."

The girl stared at Maul pointedly, then looked down at the life-sized paper child. "Are you pulling my leg, sir?"

"No, but I can, would you like me to?"

"No thank you. Sorry, sir, but that girl isn't real. She's made of paper." The girl bent the flimsy paper a little to show him.

Maul gasped dramatically. "Don't touch my child! I was right to say you had no manners. And who are _you_ to say my child cannot become a girl scout? That seems awfully exclusive of you."

"I don't know what that means, and I already told you- she's made of paper."

Maul faked extreme disappointment. "It's ok, Lindy, don't listen to the mean girl. You're completely normal to me." He decided to ask the group supervisor. "Hey lady, that girl isn't allowing my daughter to become a girl scout."

The lady got off her phone and stared at him, then at the paper doll. "That's not a child, sir, it's paper." She went back on her phone.

Maul gasped dramatically. "Well excuse me! Do you even know who I am?"

The lady turned to him again. "An obnoxious idiot?"

"Correct-! Oh wait, no. I'm Darth Maul. I'm really evil and stuff…?"

"…Alright… well, you can leave now," said the lady.

"No. I want to become a girl scout! I mean, my daughter wants to become a girl scout. And you will let me- her!" Maul shouted.

"Uhhhh no."

While this was going on, Anakin cheerily strolled by them, still in the neon orange pirate outfit. He had seen an ad for puppies on the way home from Obi-Wan's quarters and decided to go to the mall and find them. But first he had gone home to get Cherry, and asked Ahsoka if she wanted to come along too. Ahsoka was very excited to get to go to the mall and asked Barriss to come with them. So, after Barriss and Ahsoka had gone their own way, Anakin was left alone with Cherry.

Anakin could thus far not find the puppies, however, he did spot something that looked exceedingly cool in the gadget store. "Let's go see what it is!" he said to Cherry, and they walked into the store.

The person at the counter grinned with complete excitement when he saw them walk into the store. "Oh goodies! Customers!" he squealed with delight.

Anakin marched over to him. "Hiiii! I wanna know what that big machiney thing does."

The person at the counter, whose nametag read "Neddie," gasped, and his eyes became 5 times bigger and got all sparkly. "The big machiney thing? OH YES, YES!" He dragged Anakin over to the machine. "This big machiney thing is really really cool and you know what it does? Hm? Hmmm?"

Anakin was extremely excited. "No I don't know! Will you tell me?"

Neddie paused for dramatic effect. "It's a machine that turns any other species into a human!"

Anakin gasped. "Really? Can I try it?" He jumped up and down elatedly.

"Weeeell, you're already a human. So it's not going to work. But," Neddie looked to Cherry, who was watching a couple teenagers play on the videogame display, "that dog of yours… it would work on her."

Anakin looked at Cherry. "But I like her the way she is," he said with a sad face.

"Don't worry! The effects are completely reversible," Neddie assured him.

"Well, ok!"

Neddie dragged Cherry into the machine, receiving a low growl from her, and turned the machine on full power. "IT'S WORKING!" he shouted loudly over the noise.

Anakin stared at it in awe.

Seconds later, the machine hissed and came to a stop, and smoke curled out the edges of the door. Neddie inched his finger closer to the button very slowly, not knowing what would actually happen because with all honesty this was the first time he'd tried it.

His finger inched closer, and closer, and closer… and then-

"Hello? Someone let me out…" a voice came from inside the machine.

Anakin screamed. "The machine is talking!"

Neddie slammed the button and ran behind the counter, grabbing a pair or headphones as a weapon.

The door whizzed open, and the small amount of remaining smoke seeped out into the room.

Cherry stepped out, only she wasn't a wolf anymore. She was now a human with long, dark auburn hair. The irises of her eyes had a reddish tone, and though she looked completely human otherwise, she still had her wolf ears, and her tail.

Neddie hopped over the counter and walked over like nothing had happened. "I can't believe it works- I mean- Well, there you go! That's how it works… I'm so amazing…"

Anakin was staring wide-eyed at Cherry. "Cherry…?"

"Hi Anakin!" she replied happily.

"This is so cool!" Anakin squealed. "Now I can talk to you and we can play games and eat unicorn jelly and steal Ahsoka's pickles and make paper castles and go hiking and share all our secrets with each other! Except I don't wanna share my secrets. They are secret." He turned to Neddie, not giving Cherry a chance to answer. "I will buy your magic box!"

Neddie screamed with delight. "Woohoo! That will be… um… I don't know how much it is."

"I will give you five of my tater tots," Anakin said, holding up the remaining 5 tater tots he was keeping in his pocket to eat later.

"Ok!" Neddie replied excitedly and took the tater tots from Anakin. "Enjoy!"

Anakin dragged the machine onto a little cart with wheels, then took the handle to drag the cart in one hand, and in his other hand he gently took hold of Cherry's forearm and made her follow him.

After searching the entire mall twice, Anakin finally found Ahsoka and Barriss. "Time to go home!" he said cheerily.

Both Ahsoka and Barriss were carrying several shopping bags. "What did _you_ buy?" Ahsoka asked him.

"A magic box!" Anakin replied.

Ahsoka then spotted Cherry. "Who's that?"

"It's Cherry!" Anakin pulled Cherry closer to him and hugged her really tightly.

Ahsoka was silent. "It doesn't look like Cherry…"

"It's the magic box that did it! I'll show you when we get home." Anakin continued to drag the machine, and Cherry, all the way to the speeder which was too small to fit the machine. So Ahsoka and Barriss took the speeder home and Anakin took the bus with Cherry and his machine. Of course the bus got lost, but it was ok because they all stopped at the garbanzo bean theme park and bought garbanzo bean flavored cotton candy. They eventually made it home.

Ahsoka was looking at the items she had purchased at the mall when Anakin finally came home. "There you are, what happened?"

"We got stuck at garbanzo bean land!" Anakin replied, shoving the rest of his cotton candy into Ahsoka's hands. Cherry went and sat on the couch.

Ahsoka took it and started eating it. "So, what exactly does that machine do?"

Anakin got all excited again. "Ok, ok, here, get in, I'll show you!"

Raising an eyebrow, Ahsoka stayed where she was. "You think I'm just going to get into some _random_ machine, not knowing what it does?"

"I sure would!" he replied.

"Well, I'm not you. Now tell me what it does." She set down the extra cotton candy.

"It turns other species into humans!" Anakin exclaimed.

Ahsoka was silent. "How does it…?"

"I have no idea! It's a magic box."

Ahsoka was silent again for a few more minutes. "Is there a way to change back after you go in?"

"Mm hm! Neddie says the 'effects are completely reversible.'" Anakin looked at all the controls which were sparkling and shiny.

"I… suppose I could see what it does… but only for a few minutes, then I want to change back," Ahsoka stated clearly.

"Okie dokie!" Anakin pressed the button to turn it on and open the door.

Ahsoka stepped over to the machine with slight caution, and then stepped inside.

Anakin pressed another button, just as he had seen Neddie do, and the machine whizzed and whirred. Within a half minute or so, the machine ceased to make noise, and smoke could be seen leaking from the cracks where the door opens. Pressing the button to open the door, Anakin stepped back and waited excitedly.

Ahsoka stepped out, feeling different. She reached a fair-skinned hand to the side of her head, finding that she had long hair. "Whoa…" she murmured, twisting a lock of the hair around her finger and moving it in front of her face to look at it. Her hair was blonde, and went down almost to her elbow.

"Woohoo it worked!" Anakin shrieked. "You look great!"

Ahsoka went into the bathroom to look at herself in the mirror. "Wow…" She noticed that one thing hadn't changed- her bright turquoise eyes; and she was happy about that. She ran back to the living room. "I'm going to go show Barriss!"

"Have fun!" Anakin said, waving. He turned to the machine. "I love you, magic box."

No sooner than Ahsoka had left to go find Barriss again, Yoda strolled through the door with a corndog in each hand. He noticed Anakin staring at the machine. "Ooooh, donut factory I didn't know you had, Skywalker! TELL ME WHY DIDN'T YOU?"

"This is a magic box," Anakin corrected him, presenting it by spreading his arms. "I have named him- Machine Of Awesomeness. But we will call him MOP for short."

Yoda stepped up to the machine and stroked the shiny metal. "MOP, hi. Yoda, I am. Like corndogs, I do. To join corndog club, would you like?"

Anakin clapped his hands a little. "And you know what MOP does?"

"No. Do, what does MOP?" Yoda asked.

"It turns other species into humans!"

Yoda's jaw went to the ground. "Try this I want to! ! !"

"Ok! Hop in!" Anakin said, turning on the machine.

Yoda took his statement literally, and hopped into the machine.

After another half minute, Yoda emerged from the machine as a little old man with white hair and a beard. He was about 4 foot 9, but he now thought he was very tall. "Yes! Tall, I am! YIPPEE! Mirror, do you have, Skywalker?"

Anakin was still trying to get over the shock of Yoda as a human, but timidly handed him a small mirror.

Yoda looked at himself. "SWEET! Cowboy, I am! Epic you are, Skywalker! You thank!" He then looked at his corndogs which he had taken into the machine with him.

They were now tiny little people. "Put us down!"

Yoda screamed at the top of his now-human lungs, and ran away as fast as he possibly could.

The tiny little corndog people skipped away gleefully.

…

Mace had a breakthrough moment on this day in history. He had realized that even if Aayla did not want to date him, there were other things he could do… such as- eat oranges.

Having already eaten 11 oranges that day, Mace was strolling through the Temple hallways, tipping his invisible hat to all he passed by. He carried glue with him as well, because every time he ate an orange, he kept the peel. He was planning to glue all the pieces together into a suit made entirely out of orange peel and glue. Maybe eventually, he would have enough peel to make a real hat to tip.

As he grabbed another orange out of his purple backpack, Mace spotted a little old man running by and screaming. "INTRUDER IN THE JEDI TEMPLE!" he shouted loudly.

Yoda stopped. "Intruder, where is, Master Window? Like my new look, do you? Cowboy, I am!"

Mace fell silent. "Yoda? Oh, didn't realize it was you. FALSE ALARM! So, uh… why do you think you are a cowboy? Not all cowboys look like short old people, you know."

Yoda frowned at him, obviously insulted. "Tall I am now. Look. Come up to your knee, I used to. Shrunk, YOU be. And- not look like all cowboys, I do. Look like Cowboy Sam from comic book, I do." He took a small comic out of his pocket and gave it to Mace. "Keep it, you must. Have corndogs to find, I do."

Mace stared at it for a second, before noticing Yoda was walking away. "Wait! Yoda! Have an orange!" He threw an orange at Yoda.

It hit Yoda in the head and he fell face first onto the floor. "Paaaaaain!"

Then, the group of clones marched down the hallways, and spotted Mace. "There he is!" Rex shouted.

Mace screamed. "You guys? I thought I got rid of you losers!"

"WE WANT PURPLE YOGURT! GIVE US PURPLE YOGURT!"

"Save the kittens!"

"I told you to get lost!" Mace shouted, throwing an orange at Rex's head.

Rex caught it and threw it back. "We demand purple yogurt!"

"GO AWAY!"

"You asked for it, man." Rex turned to the other clones. "CHAAAAARGE!"

With an uproar of shouts and yells, all 50 clones charged down the hallway towards Mace.

Mace let out a high-pitched shriek and bolted away from them.

…

Flint had gone to Kit's quarters earlier that day, and was having carrot tea with Kit, one of his five sea cucumbers, and a couple monkeys. Of course the monkeys were more interested in pouring drips of hot tea on Kit's other giraffes and watching them jump around frantically, but who really cares about details?

"So, how's your life been?" Kit asked Flint, sipping his tea.

Flint stirred his tea with his index finger, not caring to use a spoon. "Ah, just fine, matie. Hey, ya got any dirt… or grass… or maybe some peaches?"

"Oh yes, my sea cucumber loves dirt. Don't you, Kyle?" Kit looked at the sea cucumber, who he had named Kyle.

Kyle said nothing.

"Well, since he doesn't mind, you may have some of his dirt. Rutha has the peaches. And grass…" he paused to think. "Ask Giant Buff Guy of Awesome."

Flint looked around. "Who's 'Giant Buff Guy of Awesome'?"

"The inchworm." Kit took another sip of his tea, and Giant Buff Guy of Awesome squirmed across the table.

"Oh…" Flint took some grass from Giant Buff Guy of Awesome, some dirt from Kyle, and went over to Rutha, who was watching Iggy and Ziggy drip tea on the giraffes. "Hey there, young lad…"

"Rutha is a girl!" Kit exclaimed.

"Oh, sorry, milady. Would'ya mind givin' a pirate a couple o' your peaches?"

Rutha stared at him, tipping her head. She threw a peach in his eye.

"OW! OH MY GOSH IT BURNS!" Flint screamed.

Rutha shrieked and jumped atop one of the giraffes.

Flint peeled the peach off his eyeball and brought it back to the table. He then put the dirt, grass, and peaches into his tea, crushed and mixed it with his fingers, and gulped it all down in one sip. "Mmmm!"

All the monkeys had crowded around to watch him while he was making the concoction, and now they all held up peaches, dirt, grass, and empty tea cups.

"Awww!" Kit squealed, finding it adorable. "They all want you to make them… whatever you just made!" He took his tea pot and filled all the little tea cups with carrot tea.

Flint shrugged. "Well, alright, maties!" He put dirt in all their cups, followed by grass, then the peaches. He instructed the monkeys to crush and stir it with their fingers, and, being the intelligent pink circus monkeys that they were, they all carried out the task and drank the tea.

"They love it!" Kit exclaimed. "You know, you really should go into business, I'm sure millions of monkey owners would adore having this wonderful drink to feed to their monkeys!"

Flint got stars in his eyes. "I could be'a famous pirate!"

"Yes! Go! Buy a factory, get a giant truckload of dirt, ruin a huge grassland for the grass! Buy all the carrot tea so the stores have to go out of business! RAID THE PEACH INDUSTRY!" Kit shouted.

"YES!"

"But please, don't steal anything."

"Of course."

"Ok!" Kit grinned. "Take this hat, I made it for my imaginary sister." He gave Flint a hat.

The hat had the words "I will start a factory for dirt, grass, peach, and carrot tea drink" on it.

Flint squealed. "I love it!"

"Then take it. Go. Go out into the world… soon, everyone will know you as Flint- uhh… what's your last name?" Kit asked.

"Shouldn't you know…? You're my cousin, matie…" Flint replied.

"Riiight. Um…. I suppose I forgot. Could you remind me?"

Flint remained silent. "Nope… never knew it myself. I thought that because you're related to me, you may actually know. Anyways- who needs a last name? I'll make up my own last name… like, SKYWALKER!"

"I think someone's already got that last name," Kit stated.

"But don't some people have the same last name even though they aren't related?"

"Uhhh… yeah, but…."

"Fine. KENOBI!" Flint declared.

"Again…!"

Flint groaned in frustration. "Alright, I'll pick something 'original'. CUPCAKE!"

Now Kit was silent. "Really. _Cupcake_? You're seriously going with _cupcake_?"

"Got a problem, matie?"

"…I guess not…"

"Good. Look out, ye old world! Flint Cupcake be comin'!"

…

Anakin, Padme (she was staying over at the Temple that night), Ahsoka, and Cherry had just finished dinner. Anakin still found it strange in the epically-awesome-I-wanna-scream kind of way that both Ahsoka and Cherry were human.

"So… could someone explain to me one more time why you two are human now…?" Padme asked, still completely confused.

Anakin, disregarding the fact that he had told Padme five times already, began to explain it with enthusiasm. "Well, I bought a magic box- and when you step into the box, it makes other species human! IT'S SO COOL!"

"Oh… ok…"

Ahsoka had been enjoying the fact that she was able to brush and style her own hair, something she'd secretly always wanted to do. But she knew that eventually, she wouldn't want to stay like this any longer. "It's a lot of fun. But I probably won't want to stay like this too long. Skyguy, could you get the machine to turn me back to normal in the morning?"

"Sure!" Anakin said cheerily. He looked at Cherry. "You don't want to be turned back, do you? I like to be able to talk to you! At least Ahsoka can talk when she's not human."

"I can stay like this for longer," Cherry replied. "But some day, I would like to be a wolf again. I miss it a little."

"Ok," Anakin said, somewhat reluctantly.

Within the next couple hours, everyone had gone to bed.

…

It was now the next morning, and the group had just finished eating breakfast.

"Alright, Anakin, can you please turn me back to my normal self now?" Ahsoka asked.

"Okie dokie," Anakin said with a ridiculous looking grin.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes and stepped into the machine.

Anakin looked in the instruction manual quickly, but could not find what he was looking for, so he just pressed the opposite button than the one he had pressed to turn everyone into humans. After all, it was the only button other aside from the one that opens the door.

The machine started up and made loud noises and whirrs, and eventually quieted down before the door opened.

Ahsoka stepped out of the machine. She was unable to see herself because she wasn't by a mirror, but she could feel the soft, almost tickling sensation that she had felt when her human hair was draped over her arms. She decided that it was probably just an aftereffect….

But the way Anakin looked at her with that peculiar expression on his face said that wasn't the case. "You look the same," he stated.

Ahsoka ran to the mirror and looked. Sure enough, she was still just as human as she had been before getting in the machine. She tried not to panic. "It- it must've just not worked… did you press the right button?"

"The only other one besides the first button and the door button," Anakin told her.

"Well, uh… try it again!" she exclaimed, going back into the machine.

Anakin pressed the button again, and after the machine repeated the process, still nothing had happened.

They tried the other button again, they tried pressing buttons in combinations, they tried going in the machine upside down, wearing a purple turban, flipping the machine on its side, spraying it with liquid glitter, and a whole bunch of other things.

Nothing worked.

"Does this mean," Ahsoka said in a worried whisper, "I'm going to have to stay human forever?"

**I so evil. I give you cliffhanger. :D Stay tuned!**


	7. Buff Guys Who Crash Through Doors

**Cue the dramatic music and the drum roll, I'M BACK FROM THE DEAD! ! ! Ok, not really. I didn't die. But seriously. Weeell, despite my elongated fanfiction hibernation, I am back! And especially once school ends next week, I will definitely be writing more! And the next chapter of Emblem Star is written and going through editing! :D**

**And for those of you who don't already know from other sources, I now have a Facebook page! For all of you on ye olde Book of Faces, please consider stopping by and pressing that lovely like button to hear about all the latest fanfiction updates! :)**

**AaylaKit asked: "Will Maul ever get to be a girl scout? (Wait and see, right?) ****And...um...does garbanzo bean cotton candy temporarily prevent the effects from reversing? (Now THAT is random. And it's that nefarious "wait and see" again, right...?)" Answer: Well. You're in luck. While Maul will refuse to believe me, no. He will never get to be a girl scout. As for the second question, while I'm not actually going to tell you what _will_ allow them to change back, the garbanzo bean cotton candy had nothing to do with it. XD**

**.Evreything asked: "and why the heck did you change ahsoka into a human?" Answer: Simple. I was bored :P**

**NSNW FAN asked: "And can't wait to learn more about human Cherry. Is she like Azusa Nakano?" Answer (provided by Liv, one of my resident anime information providers XD): "probably a little bit."**

**Pergjithshme asked: "Hey, if humans walk into the MOP or whatever-it-is, do they turn into other species? Will clones use it to be different?" Answer: For the first question- well, it's still to be tested! Perhaps we'll find out :D And the second one- that's an interesting concept. I don't think it works that way, but interesting concept. I like your thinking. ;)**

**DuchessSatineKenobi asked: "Do you think you could do a crossover of TCW and Phineas and Ferb? :D" Answer: Ooh, that sounds fun. I've got a lot of other ideas backed up, but I might try and get to that sometime ;D**

**Flutielover7 asked: "Ahsoka's stuck human? What will Bob say? O.o" Answer: Well, if he never finds out... XD**

**With all that being said, go read the chapter, leave a review, and go like my facebook page! :D**

**A Not-So-Normal Week**

**Chapter 7: Buff Guys Who Crash Through Doors**

"_Does this mean," Ahsoka said in a worried whisper, "I'm going to have to stay human forever?"_

"Weeeell," Anakin said, trying to come up with other options, "maybe you have a rare disease that doesn't allow you to change back to your normal species…?"

"A rare disease?" Ahsoka exclaimed.

"Don't worry, it's only common in dolphins."

Ahsoka stared at him blankly. "There has to be a way to change me back!"

"Why don't you go to the library and see what you can find? Maybe Padme could go with you," Anakin said, looking at Padme.

Padme nodded, but said, "Why don't you go with her yourself?"

"Because I am going to look at the machine and try to fix it," Anakin replied with a grin.

Padme face palmed. "Just don't break it before we can change her back."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Anakin said, still smiling widely.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes and left with Padme.

Anakin began to examine the machine. Cherry went over to the fish tank and started watching Tommy.

Glancing over at her, Anakin grinned again. "I wanna put Tommy in the machine." Then he thought of something. "Do you think he'd die from not being able to breathe?" He gasped worriedly.

"Maybe he'd be a mermaid," Cherry said, still watching the little squid as her tail swished gently from side to side.

Anakin gasped dramatically and became ecstatic.

Tommy continued to swim around, completely oblivious to what Anakin was plotting.

"Let's go to a lake and try it!" Anakin exclaimed.

"Wouldn't it be hard to get the machine all the way down there?" Cherry asked.

"Hmm…" Anakin thought for a moment. Then, as a little light bulb lit above his head, he ran into the closet and came back dragging a huge fish tank behind him. It was very long, but not much horizontally. It was tall enough to almost reach the ceiling. He filled it up with water. "There, now we have room for him!"

"I wonder what he'll look like," Cherry said.

"I think he will be a mermaid like you said!" Anakin exclaimed. "Maybe he will have pink hair!" He stuck his hand into Tommy's little fish tank and grabbed him by the tentacles. Tommy squirmed around, trying to get away, but had no success.

Anakin put Tommy on the ground in the machine and turned it on, an excited grin pasted across his face as if he was unable to remove it.

"Shouldn't we have left him in the tank…?" Cherry asked.

"But then he's gonna get stuck in it, isn't he?" Anakin looked at the machine in slight confusion.

"I dunno…"

The machine finished its procedure, and Anakin clapped his hands lightly in anticipation.

The door opened, and there was Tommy- a mer_man_ (as Anakin and Cherry didn't know, a guy "mermaid" is called a merman…) with hair that was slightly long-ish, and was the pale grey-ish color that he was in squid form, with some areas being a paler blondish color. His tail was the same color as his squid form. "Where am I?" Tommy asked in worried confusion.

"Tommy!" Anakin squealed excitedly and began dragging Tommy out of the machine by his tail.

"Lemme go!" Tommy cried as he was being dragged.

Anakin put him into the giant tank.

Tommy swam around in the water, not as skittish anymore. "Oh, that's better! Hello!" Cherry was staring at him. "What," he asked.

Cherry continued to stare at him as if he was some sort of star.

Swimming up to the glass and pressing his hands against it, Tommy looked at her. "What're you staring at?"

Cherry made no reply, and continued staring.

Tommy suddenly went off topic. "I like to make things out of seashells! Well, I mean it was always so hard to do as a squid. It was so hard to drag the shells around with my little arms." He looked at Cherry as if wondering whether she would reply or not, but she said nothing.

Anakin's jaw was on the ground. "I've always wanted a pet mermaid!"

"I'm a mer_man_," Tommy corrected him with a flicker of annoyance.

"You're like some kind of perfect fairytale prince Charming," Cherry said, almost dreamily, and didn't take her eyes off Tommy.

"Are there prince mermen?" Tommy inquired curiously.

"I dunno…"

"I like your ears," he said to Cherry. "Squid ears are like not even visible or something."

Cherry's breath caught and she stumbled over her words. "Th-th-thanks…"

"Do you like living on land?" Tommy asked.

"Yeah… I-I mean, it's nice, but I'm sure it's not as nice as living underwater." Still she did not stop staring.

Tommy thought for a moment. "Too bad there isn't a fish machine."

"I can ask Neddie!" Anakin piped up enthusiastically.

"Oh my…" Cherry murmured.

Tommy blinked, silent for a moment. "Anakin, it's ok; I think she's fine as a human."

"Y-You do?" Cherry asked.

"Certainly." Tommy smiled a little. "You're very pretty."

Cherry froze up, stumbled back a little, and collapsed on the couch in a daze.

Tommy tipped his head to the side a little and looked at her. "…What's wrong with her?"

Anakin gasped more dramatically than he ever had. Ever. "You killed her with your kind words!" he exclaimed loudly and burst out in tears.

"He thinks I'm pretty…" Cherry said to herself.

Anakin ran over to her, crying hysterically. "I'm so sorry Tommy killed you! I will bury you like Ahsoka the fishy!"

"He thinks I'm pretty," Cherry repeated, loud enough for Anakin to hear this time.

Anakin stopped crying abruptly and gasped again, this time sending himself into a coughing fit for gasping so much. "AAAHHH!" he choked, "ZOMBIE!"

"I think she's still alive, Anakin," Tommy pointed out.

"He thinks I'm pretty," Cherry said yet again, still in a daze.

Suddenly, the door broke down in a colossal explosion of broken doorframe, wood, and metal. A guy who was probably somewhere in his later teens crashed straight through the door along with the door itself and onto the ground.

Tommy stared, shocked into silence.

"INTRUDER! ! ! !" Anakin shrieked.

Cherry was snapped out of her daze.

The "intruder" got up, brushed himself off, and looked at the door. "You should get that fixed."

Anakin gasped again. "You're a genius!"

The genius in question smoothed his white-blonde hair back. "I know."

"I'm Tommy!" Tommy chirped. He smacked his hand against the glass as if trying to hold it out for the other guy to shake.

"….Of course you are."

"Welcome to my humble home," Anakin said proudly, and gave the other guy a unicorn toy.

"Thank… you…." He then noticed Cherry. "Hello there."

"Hi…" Cherry replied.

"Did it hurt?"

"What."

"When you fell from Heaven?"

Anakin gasped yet again. "You fell from Heaven?"

Cherry blushed.

"What's _your_ name?" Tommy asked the mystery man.

"Oh where ARE my manners? Oh right, I don't have any." Mystery man shrugged. "The name's Ian."

"Hello, Ian," Tommy said, smiling at him.

"Hi."

Just then, Ahsoka and Padme came back. "We didn't find anything and-" Ahsoka stopped short when she saw the broken down door and a merman in the tank. "WHAT DID YOU DO."

Anakin grinned excitedly. "I turned Tommy into a mermaid!"

"MERMAN! ! ! !"

"Isn't he awesome?"

Ahsoka face palmed. "We're supposed to be trying to get everyone back to normal! Not sticking any random creature that comes into contact with you!" At that moment, she noticed Ian. "And you! I bet you used to be a camel, didn't you?"

Ian was silent for 4 seconds. "Did it hurt?"

"Uhh… what?"

"When you fell from Heaven?"

Ahsoka walked up to Ian and smacked him, then returned to the MOP and looked it over. "There's got to be some way to change us back!"

"Wasn't there a manual that came with it?" Cherry asked.

Anakin suddenly blushed. "Was that was that was?"

"What did you do…."

Anakin smiled innocently. "I painted flowers on it."

"Every page?"

"I ripped each page apart and glued them together with Ahsoka's peanut butter, and then painted jelly on it," Anakin said, smiling happily.

"….."

"…..And where is it now?" Ahsoka asked.

"I gave it to my cousin," Anakin said, blinking a couple times in blissful innocence.

"Maybe the guy has another one," Cherry suggested.

"Or maybe he has a unicorn with magic powers to turn us into frogs!" Anakin suggested.

"No."w

"C'mon, let's go!" Ahsoka cried.

"I wanna come…" Tommy said sadly, looking at them as they all prepared to exit the door.

Cherry looked back at him. "How…?"

"Exactly." Tommy looked like he might start crying but since he lives in the water anyway I suppose you can't really tell.

"There's got to be a way…" Cherry reasoned, beginning to think.

"I can pull the tank along," said Ian with a look of proud determination. "Yes, I'm that strong."

"Oh, thank you Mr. Buff Guy!" Anakin exclaimed cheerily.

Ian looked at him. "The name's Ian."

"Ian, Mr. Buff Guy, same thing."

"Can't argue there."

Ahsoka rolled her eyes.

"Come on, let's go!" Cherry exclaimed.

So the group went back to the mall, passing the girl scout table that Maul was _still_ standing at, attracting security. Ian dragged the tank all the way into the mall, up the stairs, and across the food court before they finally reached the shop, and was completely exhausted. He wouldn't admit it, of course, but it was obvious.

"You don't have to pull me when we get home…. I'll stay here…" Tommy said, a little shyly, not wanting to make Ian pull the tank again.

Ian, panting heavily to catch his breath, held up a hand to stop him from continuing. "No! … It's ok!" he paused to take a couple deep breaths, "I… can do it!"

"If you say so…."

Anakin, meanwhile, was marching straight up to Neddie in determination. "Neddie, we need to turn the people back into not humans!"

"Ok!" said Neddie with a broad, funny-looking smile. "Just go back in the machine!"

"But it doesn't work," Anakin told him.

Neddie was silent for a couple minutes. "…Oh. Well, I have a turtle machine! That will make them not human!"

"I don't wanna be a turtle! ! !" Ahsoka cried.

"You said the effects were reversible," Cherry stated.

"They are!" Neddie declared. "Or at least I think they are… Did I forget to install the reverse button? No, that's on a car…"

Tommy's face lit up and he grinned. "What's a car!"

Neddie stared at him in silence.

"There has to be a way!" Cherry said.

"Hmmmmmmmm…" Neddie hummed in contemplation as he looked around the shop, shoving people out of the way so he could get a clear look at each of the machines he built.

After a moment, Ahsoka suddenly thought of something. "Hey, Anakin, do you remember that red button that Obi-Wan had that one time? It turned you into liquid Anakin?"

"Yeah… that was fun!" Anakin beamed and clapped his hands.

"Wasn't there a green button that could reverse the effects?" Ahsoka asked.

"Yeah," Anakin said again. "Why."

"If we point the green button at the machine…" Ahsoka said slowly, trying to think if it would work.

"Or just point it at you," Cherry said.

"It'll be safer to try it on the machine."

"Who needs safety! I jump into jellyfish all the time and I'm not a rock," Anakin stated.

Everyone stared at him in silent confusion.

Tommy spoke up. "To test the machine you can throw in those freaky corndog people Yoda accidentally made."

Cherry nodded. "Good idea."

"Don't change me back, please," said Tommy. "I like communication."

Cherry looked at Anakin with a pleading look in her eyes. "We don't have to change him back, do we?"

Ian broke into the conversation. "No, I think we should."

Anakin shook his head to Ian's remark. "No, I like talking Tommy." He smiled widely.

Ian, ignoring Anakin, continued. "I think we should allow him to return to his natural state as a small… squidis… fishacous…"

Tommy looked at them with invisible tears in his eyes.

"He would be so much happier."

"No!" Cherry cried.

"Let's talk about this when we get home," said Anakin. "I'm starving. You guys go ahead, I'll be at We Sell Sandwiches." He grinned and skipped away.

"Ok…" Cherry watched him leave.

"Let's go!" Ahsoka started walking.

Ian inwardly groaned.

Tommy smiled at him.

"Ok, ok, I got this…" Ian began to drag Tommy's tank again. All the way back.

When they did finally get back, Ahsoka went to Kit's place and knocked. Kit opened the door. "Kit, do you still have those green buttons?"

"Who are you?" Kit screamed.

Ahsoka frowned, staring at him. "It's me- Ahsoka."

"Oh. Ok!" Kit handed her a green button.

"Thank you!" Ahsoka ran all the way home and switched the Endless Setting Wheel to 'reverse machine', pointed it at the machine, and pressed it. "There! Now… where are those corndog people…"

"I dunno…" Cherry watched as Ian dragged Tommy's tank into the living room and collapsed on the floor in a heap, looking half dead.

"Thank you," Tommy said to him.

"Don't mention it… ever again…." Ian mumbled.

With perfect timing, Yoda strolled into the room with the two corndog people on his shoulders. "This, place where born, you were!"

"Oooooh!" the first corndog person squealed in excitement. The second one stared with wide eyes and a wild grin.

"Yoda, we need a corndog person," said Cherry.

Yoda gasped. "Take my babies, you cannot!"

"Ok, that's just wrong…... grandpas don't have babies…"

"Adopt them, I did," Yoda said, sticking out his tongue.

"Well we need one," Cherry said.

"Nu."

Cherry signed. "Fine, just try the machine on me then!"

"No, it's too risky," Ahsoka told her. She turned back to Yoda. "Yoda, if you give us a corndog person, we'll give him back in like two minutes."

Yoda was silent for a moment. "….Know, I don't…."

Ahsoka groaned and just grabbed one of the corndog people, throwing it into the machine. She quickly turned it on.

Yoda let out a long scream of terror.

Within seconds, the corndog person had turned back into a regular corndog.

Yoda stared at the corndog on the floor for four minutes. "…Oooooh!" He took the corndog and ate it, strolling away with the other corndog person sitting happily on his shoulder.

"Well now we know it works!" Cherry said.

"YES." Ahsoka let out a sigh of relief. She ran inside the machine. "Someone turn it on please!"

Cherry pressed the button and stepped back.

Everyone held their breath as the machine turned its gears and created its signature noise of being on.

The door opened, and Ahsoka emerged as her normal self. "YES! ! !" she cheered, far beyond relieved to be normal again.

"That's what you normally look like?" Ian asked.

"Yes!" Ahsoka exclaimed, still elated.

"You looked better human," Ian stated.

Ahsoka fell silent, staring at him in complete disbelief.

"Hey," Cherry said, glaring at Ian.

"What, it's true."

Cherry walked up to him and smacked him really hard.

Ian stared with wide eyes, shocked.

"Thanks, Cherry," Ahsoka said to her.

Cherry smiled then turned back to Ian. "If you're just gonna make mean comments about my friends, you can leave!"

Tommy attempted to break the tension that was forming between them all. "Y'know it would've been convenient for her to stay human, though. After all, wouldn't that make things work better between her and Bob?" Of course, that _may_ not have been the best attempt.

Ahsoka fell completely silent again, glaring at Tommy like she wanted to kill him.

"Who's Bob?" Cherry asked.

Ahsoka still looked completely mortified. "A guy."

"It's a shame he didn't get to see you before you changed back," Tommy said innocently, not understanding the weight of the whole situation.

"I'm glad he didn't," Ahsoka mumbled.

Cherry turned to Ian again. "Are you leaving or not?"

"Aw c'mon," Ian said, looking cool, "you know you dig me!"

At that moment Anakin came back eating his giant sandwich from We Sell Sandwiches. "Mmmmmmm. Ohey, Ahsoka's back!"

"Plus, you know I'd make a better date than that fish guy any day," Ian continued.

Cherry smacked him again and shoved him out of the room and into the hallway of the Jedi Temple, pushing him to the ground. "Don't show your face around here again or you'll be sorry!"

Ahsoka watched in silent awe.

Ian refused to give up. "Come on, baby, you-"

"GET OUT OF HERE! ! !" Cherry shouted.

Ian got off the ground. "You know you like me, but to show you what a gentleman I am, I'll respect your request." He pulled her towards him and kissed her hard for a quick moment before dashing away.

Cherry stood there in complete and utter shock, disbelief, humiliation, terror- ok, I'll stop.

"Did that just happen." Tommy was staring as well.

Anakin, on the other hand, was completely oblivious to all that was happening around him. "What do you think I would be if I went into the reverse machine?"

"A rock," Ahsoka said sarcastically, completely amazed at his ability to ignore even the most humiliating moments.

"Oooh," Anakin looked pleased with that answer.

Tommy was flicking water at Cherry to try and get her to snap out of her shocked state, but he didn't get anywhere. Cherry fainted, and fell flat on the ground.

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter of A Not-So-Normal Week 4! Don't forget to review, and I'll see you all this summer! :D**


	8. More Dates, That's Just Peachy!

**HAPPY SUMMER! ! ! ! ! :D Another chapter of NSNW4 is here to celebrate! But first, questions! Actually, first, credit!**

**I forgot to mention last chapter that Ian and Cherry belong to Liv. :) Ok, now questions!**

**Weird person who lives on mars asked: "You gonna have more on Yoda and his corndog "babies" as wrong as it sounds, and on Tommy and Cherry?" Answer: Maybe not too much on Yoda and the corndog babies, but on Tommy and Cherry, yes. :D**

**Count Mallet said: "It wouldn't surprise me if Anakin turned himself into a baked potato or a brick if he went through the machine in reverse." Ok, that seriously was really funny. I LOL'ed so hard XD**

**Believe. Really. Everything (and I realized that it's been cutting off and saying ".everything") asked: "why is anakin that dump? :DDD" Answer: Um... Anakin isn't a dump... but in guessing that you meant "dumb". He's dumb because he likes to be :)**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 8: More Dates, That's Just Peachy!**

Buy a factory. Check.

Buy a giant truckload of dirt. Check.

Ruin a huge grassland to get grass. Check.

Buy all the carrot tea so the stores have to go out of business. Check.

There was only one thing left: Raid the peach industry.

Flint stood on the outside of a huge peach orchard, watching people pick peaches. Directly to the right of the orchard was a humongous outlet mall that was selling everything from peace pie to peace scented deodorant.

Kit's monkeys had gotten permission to follow Flint, and were clinging to the wire fence of the orchard, licking their lips and trying to climb over the barbed wire at the top to get to the peaches.

"Now hold up there, maties! We be needin' to find a way to get them peaches humanely. No stealin', remember?" Flint called up to the monkeys.

Disappointedly, they climbed down and sat at his feet.

"Good. Let's go into that mall and see what they be sellin' this fine day." He walked towards the entrance to the mall with the monkeys following.

The security men stared at the entourage as they strolled through large automatic doors. Waiting for all the monkeys to get inside, they then watched Flint and the monkeys begin to walk around and marvel at the many displays.

"I don't trust those… twenty… something…" one security officer stated, glaring at them.

"Neither do I. Let's keep an eye on them, but don't let them spot us." The second officer grinned and snuck off to follow the group.

"Ninja style!" The first officer pulled on a ninja mask and jumped onto the huge peach shaped chandelier. Several people working at the different booths stared up at him with strange expressions.

While the first officer played ninja, the second one was watching Flint as all the monkeys were begging him to buy them mini peach pies.

Flint finally complied. "Fine. But then nothing else! We be here to get real peaches."

"Are you implying my peaches are not real?" the pie maker cried disdainfully.

"Oh, no, matie, sir, your peaches be the best quality in all the store. I had just been meanin' that we be here to get _fresh_ peaches," Flint corrected himself.

The woman at the peach taffy booth next door heard him. "_His_ peaches are the best in the store? You obviously haven't tasted _anything_ yet! Taste my taffy, I'll show you my peaches are better quality."

"Well…" Flint hesitated. "I guess you be makin' a valid argument, ma'am. I'll buy one bag 'o your lovely taffy."

Smiling proudly, the woman scooped taffy into a bag and handed it to Flint. He gave her the credits due for it.

The monkeys cheered and devoured all the taffy.

"Cupcakes! Get your fresh peach cupcakes, right here!"

Flint looked over and saw Pinkie Pie running a cupcake booth. Of course, he didn't know who she was, but that's besides the point.

The monkeys all ran over and began to observe the pony curiously because she was the same color as they were.

"Oh, how cute! Monkeys!" Pinkie Pie leaned over the edge of the booth to look at them.

Flint ran over to catch up with them, panting. "Ahoy, matie, you seen the fresh peach booth anywhere?"

Before Pinkie could try and answer, the monkeys began begging Flint to get them cupcakes.

"No more, monkeys! We be here to get fresh peaches, remember?" Flint said to them.

Iggy screeched in complaint.

Flint, having learned to speak monkey over the years of being a pirate, understood him. "Well, yes, I did say we were gonna raid the peach industry, but I don't think that's the same-"

The rest of the monkeys echoed Iggy's statement.

Flint sighed. "We'll take two dozen cupcakes."

…

The Purple Yogurt campaign had gotten nowhere thus far, and Rex was getting bored. He suggested they all take a break, but they thought it was a dumb idea and kicked Rex out of the campaign.

With a sad sigh, he walked down Aujourd'hui Street, passing We Sell Sandwiches. And there he saw it- Elice's shop. The words that she spoke to him came back to his mind. "Stop by any time you want."

No better time than the present.

Rex pushed open the door and walked inside, marveling at all the paintings and things that Elice was selling. A little bell attached to the door jingled when the door passed it, and Elice heard it.

"One moment, please!" her voice called from somewhere in the back room.

He patiently waited for her to come out from the back room, and looked at beautiful paintings of flowers and scenery.

Suddenly, the door flew open again, making the bell go crazy, and in ran Master Window himself.

"Lady! Have you made my painting of crayons painted WITH crayons for my lovely Aayla?" he exclaimed.

Elice came out of the back room, and Rex hid behind a shelf. "Pardon me, sir, but you only placed that order this morning. It's going to take me longer than a couple hours to finish it."

"But I need it now! Aayla's going to be walking by this street any second and I need to give it to her!" Mace shouted. "And I know because I saw on her HeadNovel page! She said she was going to be taking a walk! She said!"

"If you needed it so soon, you should have placed your order sooner. There's nothing I can do to speed up the process," Elice told him. "You're welcome to look around the store while you wait, but if you continue to cause trouble I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"LEAVE? I will not leave until the painting is in my hands!" Mace stated defiantly.

"Well then. I have a display of painted bottles over there if you want to-"

"This is taking too long! I'M LEAVING!" Mace stormed out the door.

Elice sighed and shook her head. She was about to turn and go back into the other room when she saw the outline of a person hiding behind one of her shelves. For a moment she thought it was her imagination. But it was still there after she blinked.

Rex could see her staring at him, and with a wave of shyness, regretted coming in here.

"Is someone there?" Elice asked.

"Oh, uh, yeah… it's me… Rex…" Rex stepped out from behind the shelf and waved a little.

Elice smiled. "Hi, Rex. It's nice of you to drop by. I hope that man didn't offend you. He has quite the temper…"

"Don't worry, I know who he is. You handled the situation very well," he said quietly.

"Thank you," she replied. "I had just finished adding another color to his painting, but because of the method he requested I use, it takes a while between colors to be sure it doesn't blend."

Rex blinked, lost in her dreamy voice as she explained the process. "That's cool…"

"So what have you been up to?"

He shook himself a little. "Oh, nothing much. I was part of the purple yogurt campaign with the other clones, but they kicked me out 'cause I said I wanted to take a break."

"Purple… yogurt?" she said inquisitively.

"Yeah," he replied. "It's yogurt… but it's purple…"

"But why a campaign…?"

"We- well, _they_- are demanding purple yogurt from General Window. That's the guy who was just here a couple minutes ago," he explained.

"I see…" she murmured, still seeming confused.

Rex decided to change the subject. "I really like your shop."

Elice smiled. "Thank you."

"Do you normally make stuff that people request, or did General Window demand it?" he asked, still wondering how _anyone_ could deal with that man.

"I do take requests, but they cost a little more," she replied.

Rex looked around at all the wonderful paintings. "How do you get the inspiration for all of these?"

"I look at what's around me," Elice replied. "Most of the time I just ask myself, 'How can I make this into something that's my own?' and the picture is the outcome."

"That's amazing," he said, astonished.

"I'm glad you like them," she replied, smiling.

"Yeah, they're all very pretty… and beautiful…."

"Thank you."

Rex cleared his throat to keep himself from beginning to stare. "I guess I should let you get back to work."

"No, it's alright, I can spare a little time," she told him.

"If you say so," he said, smiling a little.

Elice wiped her hands on a rag. "You know I had started to think you had forgotten our meeting after the show. But I guess you're pretty busy, no?"

"Yeah… I guess maybe I did forget just a little," he murmured, but then was quick to add, "but not on purpose." He didn't mention that half the time, he actually _wanted _to come, but was a little shy and changed his mind.

She smiled. "Well I'm glad you came."

Rex smiled back, then said quietly, "Do you want to do something together sometime? Coffee… lunch… sandwiches… the place next door is really good…"

"I'd love to," Elice replied.

He couldn't believe her reply. Keeping his excitement contained inside, he managed to speak normally. "When's a good time for you?"

"Well, I never really have a set closing time, but any day really works. I can just close early that day," said Elice.

"Ok… so maybe… tomorrow?"

"Sounds good." She smiled.

Rex smiled back, still looking calm, but inside he was screaming _I HAVE A DATE! ! ! ! !_

"I can close up around 5:30. Would that work for tomorrow?"

Still screaming _I HAVE A DATE! _in his head, Rex almost didn't hear her. "Huh- oh yeah, that works perfectly, great, wonderful." His smile widened.

"Ok." Another smile.

Rex couldn't believe his ears. "I guess it's a date- I mean meeting… thing… dinner, yeah…"

Elice smiled again. "A date."

Rex got stars in his eyes. "Ok!" He grinned like an idiot. "I'll see you tomorrow then!" He skipped towards the doorway and crashed into the doorframe, knocking over a couple things. Quickly catching them, he set them back up.

"Are you alright?" Elice asked in mild alarm.

Rex rubbed his face. "Never been better!" He opened the door and left, skipping off down the street.

Elice just watched him as he left, shaking her head a little in disbelief and smiling.

…

As evening approached, Bob approached the door to Anakin's shared quarters wearing yellow pants and a purple and red Hawaiian t-shirt. He knocked twice and waited.

Ahsoka had not known he was coming, and went to answer the door. She stood there and stared for a moment. "Bob… that is a very unflattering color on you…"

"Isn't it?" Bob grinned.

"What are you doing here," she asked in a bored voice after rolling her eyes.

"It's such a lovely night, I figured it'd be the perfect time for our second date!"

Ahsoka dropped her head low and groaned. "Can't we just postpone it until we're both five hundred?"

"I don't think we'll be alive then."

"Exactly."

"C'mon, Ahsoka, please?"

Ahsoka pulled out her phone and began to check Chicken Farm Village. "Fine. But only 'cause I have to."

Bob smiled. "Perfect. But one more thing," he stepped forward and took her phone out of her hands. "Don't bring this."

"Hey!" Ahsoka cried, reaching for her phone. "Give that back!"

Bob held the phone out of her grasp. "Nope. You're going to actually focus this time and enjoy the date, not text and play with imaginary cows."

"I do not play with imaginary cows. I PLAY WITH IMAGINARY CHICKENS," Ahsoka stated with forceful enthusiasm. She tried to grab her phone again.

Bob kept it away from her. He tossed the phone inside and pulled Ahsoka out of the doorway before she could object.

He dragged her along down the hallways. "You didn't even let me change into something nicer! I can't go on a date looking like this!" Ahsoka exclaimed.

"I thought you didn't want to go on this date. Why would you care how you look?" Bob asked, sarcasm tinting his voice.

Ahsoka fell silent. "Good point…"

Twenty minutes later, they were sitting on a bench (a generous distance apart from each other) in a restaurant, waiting for a table.

"Do we SERIOUSLY have to wait THREE HOURS for a table? Just to eat dinner?" Ahsoka exclaimed, nearly having to shout over the noise of the restaurant.

"I just wanted to do something special!" Bob shouted back.

"It's not gonna be any fun if we're out until one in the morning just because we can't get a stupid table!"

"It's not even five thirty!"

Ahsoka moaned and buried her face in her hands. "All because of Anakin's stupid game show."

"What?" Bob called over the noise.

"Nothing!" Ahsoka yelled to be heard.

"You don't need to shout!" Bob replied loudly.

"I'M NOT SHOUTING."

The two waited awkwardly for the next two hours and fifty-nine minutes. Then, the head chef walked out into the dining area and called for everyone to be quiet.

"Ve ar very very sorry, but ze kitchen has run out of food. Ve ar closing ze kitchen."

Everyone who hadn't already gotten their food let out a simultaneous groan.

Ahsoka turned to Bob in annoyance as hundreds of people shuffled out the double doors. "_Now_ what?"

Bob was sitting there with his jaw on the ground. "Uhhhh… we find another place to eat…?"

Ahsoka face palmed. "Let's just get this over with."

They went outside the restaurant and stood by a light post.

"Where do you want to go?" Bob asked her.

"Home."

"No, I meant for dinner."

Ahsoka sighed. "I don't really care right now. It's already quarter past 8."

Bob thought for a moment. "Plo's fast food restaurant is open till midnight. Let's just go there."

A little light returned to Ahsoka's eyes. "That's the best idea you've suggested all night."

Bob grinned. "Let's go."

The two walked to Plo's fast food restaurant, which was only a couple blocks away, and went inside.

"Bob! Ahsoka!" Plo exclaimed as he prepared an order of crispy chicken pieces for a customer.

"Hey Master!" Bob called, getting in line with Ahsoka.

"Hi Master Plo," said Ahsoka.

The person ahead of them received their order and left.

"What brings you two here?" Plo asked, adjusting his fast-food-worker hat.

"I'm taking Ahsoka on a date," Bob replied, beaming proudly.

"Only because he won _seven_ dates with me on a game show," Ahsoka added, still looking much less than thrilled about it.

Plo clapped his hands. "This is the perfect place for a date! Look, no one else is here. I'll dim the lights and put on some romantic music!"

"Plo, please don't-" Ahsoka started, but he had already ran to the back room.

Another worker came to the counter, took their order, and gave them a number.

The two then went to a table and sat down, waiting for their food.

A couple seconds later, the lights went down and the tea light candles on the table lit by themselves. Romantic music began to play. A waiter came to the table with a tray and served them their cheeseburgers and fries.

Ahsoka sipped her soda. "This is certainly… interesting…"

Bob stuffed fries in his mouth. "I know right?"

A man walked into the door, but hearing the romantic music and seeing the dim lights, he thought he was in the wrong place and this was not a fast food restaurant, so he left.

Plo walked up to the table Bob and Ahsoka were at, suddenly wearing a suit and tie. "Are you enjoying your meal, _madam et monsieur_?"

Ahsoka stared at him with a peculiar expression. "Uh, yeah, it's great, just like always."

"_Très bien_," said Plo.

"Where did you learn to speak French?" Ahsoka asked.

"_Je vais tuer mon poisson avec les boutons surdimensionné_," Plo replied.

Ahsoka had no clue what he said. "Um, wonderful!"

Plo cleared his throat. "My skills are, _un peu rouillé_- a little rusty. But alas, I save it for special occasions."

"Dude, that is cool." Bob took a huge bite of his juicy burger.

"I will leave you two to your lovely meal. _Bon appetite._" Plo gave them a courteous bow and left the table.

Ahsoka laughed a little as he left. "Oh, Plo. Always going over the top."

Bob set down his paper cup after taking a sip of his cherry soda. "I think it's great. A perfect date for you and I."

Ahsoka rolled her eyes a little. "You know that it wouldn't matter how many dates you took me on. I'm never gonna fall in love with you."

A small grin crept onto Bob's face. "We'll see about that, won't we?"

"You certainly will," Ahsoka stated. "I will bet you twenty credits that by the end of these seven dates, I won't even have the slightest feelings for you."

Bob raised an eyebrow. "I'll accept that bet on one condition," he said, swirling a fry in his ketchup.

"And that condition is…?"

He looked into her eyes. "That you actually _try_ to enjoy yourself. If you don't ever have feelings for me, I can't really do anything about it. But all I want you to do is try."

Now it was Ahsoka who raised an eyebrow. "I can try all I want, Bob. It's never going to happen."

"We'll see about that."

**What will happen? :O :D**

**A couple side notes- Every Wednesday on my Facebook page I'm doing "Questionable Wednesday", where you can ask questions for certain characters. If you're not able to get to the Facebook page, I have reopened private messaging on my FF account for questions and suggestions. For anonymous reviewers who also can't get to the Facebook page, you may ask questions in reviews. But please leave that as a last option. Questions this coming Wednesday will be answered by Cherry! :D**

**I will also be out of town for a week, so starting Saturday Liv will be taking over until I return :)**


	9. The Dream Team

**Hello readers! Sorry it took so long to get this out! I was so bored I forgot to write :P**

**Anyways, thanks a bunch to Liv for helping me with this chapter, as well as coming up with the idea which takes place near the end of this chapter, which I will clarify for credit at the end.**

**Ohhh yes, Plo's comment. :D I had no idea that one simple French phrase would get all of you talking :D Plo said "I will kill my fish with oversized buttons." And my vacation was nice! :) All the other questions were just about what's gonna happen, so I'm gonna be evil and not answer them 8D xDDDD**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 9: The Dream Team**

The light flickered a bit over the tall chairs at the Happy Emu. The place was completely empty except for one person sitting atop one of those tall chairs at the counter.

Ian.

The door jingled and another person walked in and up to the counter near the row of chairs. It was Lux, and he was lost in thought about how in the heck he was going to get around the obstacle of Bob, make Ahsoka like him, and eventually call this story his happily ever after. He ordered some ice cream and sat down on the chair next to Ian, not even acknowledging that there was someone there.

Ian was in pretty much the same position. "I don't get it. I'm a lot hotter than that other guy. Why did she reject me. And the kiss didn't have any effect!" he said, talking to no one but himself.

Lux was pulled out of his thoughts by the sudden voice. "Eh?"

"What?"

"What did you say."

"Oh. Nothing. Just strategizing." Ian stared off at the menu behind the counter, not actually reading it.

"Ah. Same here," Lux said. "Stupid game shows."

"What?" Ian asked, obviously confused.

"Game shows. You probably wouldn't understand," Lux replied.

"…. So, what's wrong with you?"

"The girl meant for me was stolen by a video-game-obsessed hippie," Lux stated.

Ian looked straight at him and studied him for a second. "Hot guy like you? Is she blind or something?"

Lux straightened up and smiled boastfully. "She most certainly must be."

"Maybe both our girls are blind, that would explain everything."

"Sure would. The writers have ordained our future! This guy wasn't in the script." Lux slammed his head on the counter, forgetting his ice cream was there, and got ice cream and sprinkles in his hair.

"Tough luck, man," Ian said. "Hey, maybe we can strategize together."

"Terrible idea." Lux thought for a moment. "But, what if we strategize together?"

"Didn't I just say that?"

"I don't recall."

Ian shrugged. "But let's give it a try. Maybe we can figure it out."

"Yes. I'm certain we will. But if we're going to try anything, we need to get rid of Skywalker's crazy wild cat," Lux muttered, trying to figure out in his mind how one would go about getting rid of a giant black cat… even when it's a wolf….

"Who's Skywalker?"

"Anakin Skywalker… famous Jedi… you may have heard of him," Lux explained.

"Wasn't that the guy whose door got in my way?" Ian asked.

"Maybe it was. I wasn't there. But the girl I love… Ahsoka Tano… she lives there," said Lux, thinking dreamily of Ahsoka.

"Ahsoka… I know that name…. Isn't that the orange girl?"

Lux frowned. "If by that crude statement you are referring to her lovely orange colored skin, yes. The 'orange girl.'"

"She looked better when she was human," Ian stated.

"She was human," Lux asked in a question that sounded like a statement because he was so shocked.

"Yeah."

"I need to see that!" Lux declared, beginning to get up even though he hadn't even eaten his ice cream.

"She was blonde," Ian continued.

Lux tried to imagine Ahsoka as a blonde human. "She must've been so hot!"

"Yeah, she was," Ian agreed.

"Wait- and you're saying she changed back?"

"Yeah."

Lux wrinkled his nose a little. "What a waste."

…

It was a rather lazy day back at Anakin's quarters. Ahsoka was in her room building herself a glass cage completely lined with computer screens so that not _only_ would she be protected from Bob, but she could also play HeadNovel all day long. Anakin was remodeling the kitchen. Cherry was watching Anakin, and Tommy was at the bottom of his tank, looking sadly out the clear, glass walls to try and watch Anakin as well. Unfortunately, the wall between the living room and kitchen was in the way, so there he stayed, flapping his tail slowly in the water and watching little bubbles float to the surface.

After about forty-five minutes, Anakin realized that he needed to go to the grocery store. "I will be back! Byebye!" He grabbed a large basket and skipped out the door to go to the grocery store.

"Bye," said Cherry, and she went back into the living room and sat on the couch.

"Bye…" Tommy was a little happier now that Cherry was back in the room, but still felt longing in his heart.

"Is something wrong, Tommy?" Cherry asked, hearing the sad note in his voice.

Tommy swam over to the edge of the glass with a flick of his tail. "I wish that I could be out there with all of you… I feel so trapped in here."

Suddenly Ahsoka shouted from her room, "GUYS HELP ME! ! I DIDN'T MAKE A DOOR! ! ! HELP I'M TRAPPED! ! !"

"Exactly, see that's how I feel," Tommy stated.

"NO I'M NOT KIDDING."

"I know, I can't get out."

Ahsoka slammed her head on the glass walls she had built together and sank to the ground.

Cherry sat there on the couch and bit her lip, trying to think of both how to help Tommy and also get Ahsoka out of her glass cage.

Tommy looked around the room, and his eyes fell on the MOP, sitting in the corner where Anakin had placed a plaque that read, "This machine is totally cool and turns other species into humans! -insert scream-" and he got an idea. "Hey, Cherry…"

"Yeah?" Cherry looked over at him.

"Do you think… if I went in the machine again… I would turn into a real human…?" His voice was hopeful, speaking of a fantasy that would allow him to live a normal life, and not have to spend his years confined to the space of a glass box in the corner.

"We can try," Cherry said to him.

"How am I going to get over there?" Tommy asked.

"I'll help you," Cherry replied. She went over to the tank and climbed on a chair to reach the top of the tank.

"Ok," he swam up to the edge of the tank.

Cherry helped him get out of the tank and quickly to the machine before he dried out from not being in water. She pressed the button and stood back, waiting.

The process of the machine seemed to go a little slower than normal to Cherry, but maybe it was just the suspense. After all the long seconds, it finally slowed down, and there was complete silence.

The door hadn't even opened yet when Tommy's voice came from inside. "No way!"

"What?" Cherry asked in anticipation.

"It worked! ! !" The door opened and Tommy ran out of the machine on human legs and spun around in circles, happier than he'd ever been in his whole life.

"I don't believe it!" Cherry cried.

Tommy hugged her and spun her around with him, smiling widely.

Cherry laughed as she was swept off her feet.

"This is so awesome!" he exclaimed.

"I know!"

"We need to go tell Anakin!" At this point, Tommy wouldn't have minded if they had to run all the way to the grocery store; in fact, he would love to do it.

"But we don't know which grocery store he went to," Cherry reminded him.

"Oh. Well, in that case, I want to go to a place with grass and lots of flowers and open space where we can run!" Tommy said excitedly.

"Ok!"

Tommy ran all the way out of the Jedi Temple and then stopped abruptly. "Do you know where a place like that is?"

Cherry stopped next to him. "I'm sure we can find one; let's just go!"

"Ok!" Tommy beamed and started running again.

So the two ran for a while and eventually found a large open field with grass and flowers, just like Tommy had imagined. Why it was on Coruscant, we will never know, but that's besides the point.

"Yay! ! !" Tommy cheered, running in a huge circle across the grass. He then fell back into the grass and stared up at the sky, breathing heavily after the run.

Cherry laughed and fell on her back right beside him.

"I've never felt so free!" Tommy said, looking over at her. She smiled at him, and he sat up, looking at where she was. "And now we don't have to worry about the water being a problem… we can be together." He smiled back at her.

"Yeah," Cherry said, looking up at him.

With a happy sigh, Tommy laid back in the grass, and felt his heart flutter when Cherry curled up against him, her fluffy tail swishing back and forth happily. Then he closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of the sun on his body in a way that never was possible under the water.

…

Ahsoka tried everything to get out of the glass cage. She tried shouting, texting all her imaginary friends on HeadNovel, smashing her fists against the walls… nothing worked. So she just sat down again and waited, because Anakin had been at the grocery store for hours and Tommy and Cherry had left.

There was a knock at the front door.

"I'M HERE! COME IN! GET ME OUT OF HERE!" Ahsoka screamed at the top of her lungs.

The door opened and in walked Montana. "Eh? Where are y'all? Anakin said he wanted me here today," she said in her Southern-like accent.

"I'M IN MY ROOM. PLEASE SAVE ME!"

Montana went into Ahsoka's room and saw her stuck in the glass cage. "Ahsoka…. What in the galaxy have ya gotten yourself into this time?"

"A GLASS CAGE."

"No need to shout, I can hear ya just fine. Stand back!" Montana grabbed a stick of butter from Ahsoka's peanut butter machine.

Ahsoka stood as far back as she could in the glass cage and closed her eyes really tightly.

Montana held the stick of butter like a baseball bat, and whacked it at the glass as hard as she could. The cage exploded into a confetti of glass shards.

"I'M FREEEEE!" Ahsoka screamed and ran out of the room stepping on glass. "Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow."

Montana hopped around the glass and exited the room as well, brushing her orangish-auburn bangs out of her face. "So… any particular reason you were… trapped in a glass cage…?"

"I built it to protect myself from Bob!" Ahsoka declared, plopping down on the couch and scraping glass off the bottom of her feet. "And to play HeadNovel all day."

"You mean by cousin Bob?" Montana asked.

"The same!" Ahsoka stated with indignation.

"What's wrong with my cousin?" Montana tipped her head to the side a little, confused why anyone would not like Bob, since she was very fond of him as a cousin.

"I HAVE TO DATE HIM!" Ahsoka didn't care that she was letting herself go a little too crazy over this.

"What? That's great! Bob's always liked you, he told me himself." Montana smiled widely.

Ahsoka groaned and buried her face in her hands.

The front door opened and a newspaper flew through the door and broke a window, landing outside on the balcony.

"More broken glass," Montana murmured.

Ahsoka got off the couch and went outside, stepping on all the glass by accident. "Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow." She picked up the newspaper and came back. "Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow."

"You really gotta watch where you walk," Montana told her.

Ahsoka ignored her and tossed the newspaper on the table for now.

The door opened again and at this point both Ahsoka and Montana expected it to be another airborne projectile, but it was just Cherry and Tommy.

"This is the best day ever!" Tommy exclaimed, holding Cherry's hand.

"This is the WORST day ever," Ahsoka corrected him.

"Hm." Cherry walked into the room with Tommy, obviously agreeing with him rather than Ahsoka.

"I honestly think this day's been kinda average," Montana stated.

The door opened again and a squirrel flew through the room, out the broken window, and off the balcony with a loud, screechy scream.

Everyone was silent for six and two thirds minutes.

The door opened again and everyone ducked and closed their eyes.

"Please save me!" Tommy exclaimed in fear.

"Whaaaaattt! What do you need saving for, Tommy!" Anakin barged into the room carrying seventeen shopping bags.

"I thought you went to the grocery store," Cherry said.

"I did!" Anakin dropped all the bags down on the floor where they created a tremendous _CRASH!_

Cherry looked at the table and noticed the newspaper. She picked it up and read the front page. "What's 'Galaxy Idol'?" she asked, scanning the text.

The door opened yet AGAIN and Barriss ran into the room at forty-five hundred miles per hour. "OH MY GOSH YOU GUYS THAT SHOW IS THE BEST EVER! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" she screamed loudly.

Anakin looked genuinely confused. "A galaxy made of idols…?"

"No, you idiot," Barriss scolded him.

"What is it?" Cherry asked.

"It's the most awesome show in the whole galaxy! ! ! ! ! ! Except maybe Doctor Hoo. Or Which Guy Gets to Date the Girl."

"That's mine!" Anakin exclaimed.

"I despise THAT show," Ahsoka mumbled.

"But what's it about?" Cherry asked, wanting to actually get some information.

"People from all around the galaxy audition to sing! Honestly most of them aren't that great, but sometimes they are! ! I just watch it for the judging drama," Barriss stated with a wild grin.

"Oh," Cherry said, "'Cause it says in the paper they're holding auditions today."

"OH MY GOSH! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" Barriss fainted.

"That sounds fun!" Anakin cried.

"Yeah," Cherry agreed.

"Are you going to do it?" Tommy asked.

"I dunno…"

Barriss woke up, jumped up, and ran as fast as she could all the way to wherever the auditions where.

Ahsoka stared at her and face palmed.

"I want to do it!" Anakin exclaimed.

"Really?" Cherry looked at him in slight disbelief.

"Yes. I want to sing the country song," Anakin declared.

"What's the country song."

"I have never sung you the country song?" Anakin exclaimed, not able to believe it. "Allow me to demonstrate. Montana taught it to me."

"That I did! ! !" Montana cried, and the two began singing the country song together.

Cherry slowly put her hands over her ears. Tommy started dancing. Ahsoka ran and hid in her room.

After too many long minutes, the song was over.

"That was great, y'all! !" Montana declared, clapping her hands a little.

"Woohoo!" Anakin cheered.

Cherry was still covering her ears.

"Montana, you should try out for Galaxy Idol too!" Anakin said.

Montana adjusted her cowgirl hat a bit. "What? Psh, nah. I don't need no judges tellin' me how I sing. But y'all have fun!" She proceeded to leave and go about whatever she had to do on that particular day.

Cherry uncovered her ears. "Is it over?"

"Sadly yes," Anakin replied.

Cherry breathed a silent sigh of relief and put her hands down.

"I thought it was great," Tommy said, smiling at Anakin.

"Well what are we waiting for!" Anakin cried, jumping up and down a little. He ran into Ahsoka's room and dragged her out with him. Ahsoka had gotten on HeadNovel on her phone again and didn't really care.

And they all left for the Galaxy Idol auditions.

…

"Dude, our troubles are over," Ian announced, walking over to Lux.

"Really?" Lux asked, grinning with excitement.

Ian slapped a newspaper down on the table and pointed to the ad for Galaxy Idol auditions.

Lux's smile remained. "Perfect, man. I'm an amazing singer."

"So am I," Ian stated.

"Now," said Lux, "how are we going to make sure that they're there to see us totally smoke the other competition…"

"We could tap their phones," Ian suggested.

"Perfect."

"I don't know if she has a phone though…"

"Dude, everyone has a phone. If she doesn't have a phone then how're you going to text her?" Lux asked.

"Good point," Ian agreed.

"C'mon, maybe they aren't home."

"Ok."

The two guys walked over to Anakin's shared quarters and found a note on the door. "There is a note," Lux said, ripping it off the door.

Ian read it from Lux's hands. It said, 'gone to idol auditions.' "Perfect! They're going to the auditions."

"Well, what a wonderful coincidence. Onward!" Lux exclaimed.

"To auditions!" Ian declared.

And they marched off and away to find the place where the auditions were being held.

**Well, that's the end of chapter 9! We're almost half way through A Not-So-Normal Week 4! Whaaat? XD**

**The idea for Galaxy Idol was Liv's :3**


	10. Seeing Crispy

**I am feeling so much more productive fanfiction-wise this summer! :D If you didn't already see, a new chapter of Emblem Star was uploaded last night, and the next should be out this week! :D So please enjoy this awesomely random chapter! And thanks to all of you who have liked our Facebook page! :)**

**Pergjithshme asked: "what's the country song?" Answer: It's a song Montana wrote.**

**Anonymous asked: "Will there be the lyrics for the country song?" Answer: Someday, hopefully yes. The last line is sung in this chapter, but that doesn't even begin to cover it :D**

**And thanks to Count Mallet for always placing a "You know you're reading ANSNW when..." in your reviews, they just make what I write seem more humorous to me! XDDD**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 10: Seeing Crispy**

"Hey, dude, gimme your glasses, I needz to see crispy." The man speaking reached for one of the judges' glasses and put them on his face.

"Yo, dawg, gimme back my fly glasses," the judge in question exclaimed, trying to get them back.

"Nuuuu, needz tu see crispy!"

"DAWG."

"I am not a dog. I am..." his voice became dramatic, "BRYAN SEECRISP! ! ! ! ! !"

Bryan Seecrisp, the host of Galaxy Idol, was in the room with the three judges- Candy Macson, Barbie Pez, and Curious Steve the talking orangutan.

"Yo, Bryan," Candy said, still wanting to get his glasses back.

Bryan pursed his lips and ignored Candy.

A random security guard walked into the room. "Uhhhh… guys… the people are kinda waiting outside… y'know, for the auditions that are supposed to be today?"

"Oh, right," Candy said. "Let the first one come in." He grabbed his glasses from Bryan.

Bryan looked like he was going to cry.

"You guys," Barbie said, laughing at them.

Curious Steve had a straight face and looked bored.

"Who is first? I will teach them to see crispy!" Bryan declared.

The door burst open and Barriss ran into the room. "OH MY GOSH I HAVE WAITED MY ENTIRE LIFE TO MEET ALL OF YOU I JUST TOTALLY ADORE ALL YOUR DRAMA AND JUDGING... STUFF! ! ! ! ! !"

"Aw, thank you, baby," said Barbie. "What's your name?"

Barriss looked like she was about to explode she was so overjoyed. "Barriss! ! ! !"

"And what are you going to sing for us today, Barriss?"

The wild grin on Barriss's face looked like she was stretching her face with rubber bands. "A SONG! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !"

"What song?"

"A song about Galaxy Idol! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" Barriss's eyes filled with stars and widened.

"But what's the name of the song," Barbie asked, looking at Barriss.

"Don't you guys know it? It's your theme song! ! !" Barriss began to hum the Galaxy Idol theme song. With vigor.

Everyone remained silent and stared at Barriss as she hummed.

"Wooooowwww… I need to go somewhere else… I'm not seeing crispy…" Bryan murmured.

Barriss finished even more dramatically than she started.

Candy blinked. "….Wow, uh… ok…"

Curious Steve stared with a straight face.

"So did I get on? Did I did I did I?" Barriss exclaimed, jumping up and down.

"Uh, I don't think it's _quite_ what we're looking for," said Candy.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, sweetheart," Barbie added.

The stars in Barriss's eyes broke like glass and crumbled to the ground like they were in some sort of cartoon. Then she fainted.

Curious Steve stared. "… She faints nicely."

"Not now, Steve," Barbie mumbled with a sigh.

"That was totally _not_ crispy," said Bryan. "Someone drag her outta here!"

Security guards came and dragged Barriss away.

"Next," said Candy.

Anakin walked into the room. "Awwwwwwww! ! ! You has monkey!" He stared at Curious Steve in awe.

"ORANGUTAN, MAN," Curious Steve shouted.

Anakin's eyes grew and he stared at Curious Steve in shock for five minutes. "… Hi orangutan!"

"Welcome to the auditions, are you seeing crispy today?" Bryan asked him.

"Oh, yes, I always see crisps! I love crisps," Anakin remarked.

"So, what's your name, dawg," asked Candy.

"Oh, I am not a dog, Cherry is a dog. A fluffy puppy!"

"Ok, dude, what's your name?" Candy asked again.

Anakin gasped. "You don't know my name?"

"No."

"I'm only like, the most famous Jedi in the galaxy!"

"Just tell us your name," said Curious Steve.

Anakin beamed. "Anakin Skywalker!"

"And what are you gonna sing?"

"The Country Song!" Anakin declared.

"Never heard that one… go ahead."

Anakin began to sing the Country Song, exactly the way Montana had taught him. Everyone was silent as he sang.

"So now our song comes to and end, so I hope y'all enjoyyyyyeeeeddd…" Anakin sang, and then finished dramatically, "the country song! ! ! ! ! ! ! !"

Everyone remained silent. Anakin folded his hands and rocked back and forth on his feet while waiting.

"Well… that was… interesting…" Candy started, barely able to actually speak.

Barbie burst out laughing. "I'm sorry, baby, don't mind me." She covered her face and continued to laugh.

"Did you like it?" Anakin asked excitedly.

"I don't think you're ready yet, man. Sorry," said Curious Steve.

"Well you should hear _Montana_ sing it, because she wrote it. But she said she 'didn't need no judges' to judge her singing," Anakin said, as if they actually cared.

"Uhhh…."

"I will just go with her to sing the country song with her huge extended family on The South."

Candy was silent. "…... I say no."

Barbie was still laughing. "Sorry, no."

"No," Curious Steve mumbled with another bored straight face.

"Well, have fun with your monkey!" Anakin said cheerily, and he skipped out of the room.

"Orangutan."

Anakin skipped back to the main room where everyone else was. "You're next, Cherry!"

Cherry was nervous. "Ok…"

"Go on!" Anakin shoved her into the room.

Cherry stumbled into the room and everyone looked over.

"Welcome to the auditions, are you seeing crispy?" Bryan asked.

"W-what?"

"I always see crisp," Bryan stated, looking cool.

"Uhm…" Cherry was still kind of confused and also nervous.

"Ok whatever," Bryan mumbled.

"What's your name, sweetheart?" Barbie asked.

"Cherry…"

"And what are you going to sing for us today?"

"Umm…" Cherry decided on a song and, after they gave her the okay to start, sang beautifully for about twenty seconds.

"Wow," Barbie said in awe.

"That was smokin'," said Curious Steve. "I dunno about you guys but I say yes."

"Yes for me!" Barbie agreed.

"You made it, you're going to Jollygood!" Candy exclaimed. Jollygood was the city in which the actual Galaxy Idol show would take place, on a distant planet where movie stars live.

"Seriously?" Cherry cried, barely believing her ears.

"Now _that _is seeing crispy!" Bryan declared.

After another minute, Cherry ran out of the room with a piece of paper which said that she made it.

"You made it! ! !" Tommy cried, running over to her.

"I know! !" Cherry could not contain her excitement.

Anakin had his jaw on the ground in awe and elation. "CHERRY'S GONNA BE ON TV! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !"

At that moment, Ian walked over with Lux.

Ahsoka was about to congratulate Cherry when she spotted them. "Everybody move _quickly_ and whatever you do, don't look back!" She began to speed-walk away.

"Why?" Anakin asked, and he looked back. "It's Mr. Buff Guy and Lux! HI MR. BUFF GUY AND LUX!"

Ahsoka nearly died.

"You?" Cherry cried.

"Ah, so that's the girl, hm?" Lux asked, looking at Cherry.

Cherry growled at Lux, not yet forgetting the bout in the ice cream shop.

"I've never seen her before," said Lux.

Cherry glared at him, looking about ready to destroy him.

"I _thought_ we got rid of you two," Ahsoka said to them through gritted teeth.

"Well _excuse us_ if we're trying out for Galaxy Idol and _happened_ to bump into you," said Ian.

"Any particular reason you're _together_?" Ahsoka pressed, suspicious.

"There's no law against two guys going somewhere together," Ian stated.

Ahsoka raised an eyebrow. "Uh huh. And you just happened to find us here. Coincidence? Maybe. But I'm suspicious. Mostly for the fact that I just don't like either of you."

"That's not our fault, princess."

"Is it? Well. We were just leaving. C'mon, Cherry." She grabbed Cherry's arm and began to walk away.

Cherry still looked like she wanted to destroy Lux. Tommy was hiding behind a plant.

"Wait, Ahsoka, come back!" Lux called.

Ian wanted to call after Cherry, but he didn't actually know her name.

Ahsoka continued to drag Cherry away.

…

Yoda had decided to go to the hair salon with his corndog kid. They walked together and stopped at a muffin and ice cream stand to get soy milk muffin ice cream with dried peaches, prunes, pureed spinach, oatmeal, and a dash of weight-loss protein. Y'know, to stay nutritious.

"Best days ever as human I have been," Yoda said to his corndog kid as their walked to the hair salon.

"That's nice, Grandpa! Do I have a name?" The corndog kid looked up at him with its little beady eyes.

"Named, you aren't. Name you, I will." Yoda fell into deep thought and licked his ice cream which was in a wheat germ cone. "Bernie. Named you are, Bernie."

"Ok!" exclaimed Bernie, and they continued to walk along.

After Yoda spent three hours at the hair salon getting a giant white afro, he and Bernie went back to the Jedi Temple and were met by Kit, who was going home after a lovely evening stroll.

"Good day, sir!" Kit said happily, waving at Yoda and Bernie.

"Kit, hi. Like your boots, I do. Borrow them for party tomorrow, can I?"

Kit fell silent. "Yoda…?"

"Yoda, I am. Bernie, this is. Ask that, why do you?" Yoda stopped and looked up at Kit.

"You look… different…. Did you get a haircut?"

"Did, yes I. Like, do you?" Yoda smoothed his wrinkly hand over his new white afro.

"It's really… you…" Kit said, still not being able to figure out _why_ Yoda looked so strange.

"You, thank. Bernie, come," Yoda said, and continued walking away with Bernie.

Kit stared as they walked away and decided not to even ask who Bernie was. He walked all the way back to his quarters, opened the door, and was met by utter chaos.

"KIT. HELP ME." Flint was standing in the middle of a gigantic pile of everything peach flavored, scented, and shaped. All twenty-two monkeys were parading around the room on a sugar high, licking lollypops and jumping on peach pillow pies.

There wasn't a single fresh peach to be found in the room.

"Flint…? What happened?" Kit exclaimed, digging through a stack of purple peach paintings.

"Well… first it was the peach pies, then the peach taffy, then the peach _cupcakes_ and then there was the pretty peach puffs, and prudent peach peppers, and Peter Popper's pickled peach pecks, and peach plum pachyderms, proud peach parachutes, pink pasty peach parakeets-!" Flint collapsed on the ground from exhaustion.

"Flint! Are you ok?" Kit asked.

"Oh the palpable persistent pain…!" Flint moaned.

The monkeys continued to run circles around the room, having the time of their lives.

Kit stood up from where he had knelt down beside Flint and began to frown. He watched the monkeys for a moment before shouting, "Jimmy! Rutha! Sebastian! Iggy! Ziggy! Fifi! Lulu! Jessie! Georgio! Pete! Harry! Freddie! Bobby! Ned! Arthur! Larry! Eddie! Walter! Quincy! Denny! Oliver! Penny!"

The monkeys stopped running one by one respectively as their names were called, and looked up at Kit.

"What is the meaning of this?" he exclaimed, gesturing to the giant pile of peach items.

There was silence for about two seconds before all the monkeys began screeching and arguing and explaining all at once, each blaming someone else. It was a complete mess.

"QUIET! ONE at a TIME!" Kit cried, exasperated. The monkeys fell quiet again. "Someone just please tell me what happened! I can't understand anything with all of you yapping!"

Larry came forward and began to explain in clear, understandable Monkey language that Flint bought all of the peach stuff for them.

"Flint," Kit said, looking at his collapsed cousin, "I thought you went to buy fresh peaches! And haven't I told you not to buy my monkeys anything with sugar as the first, second, third, fourth, fifth, or last ingredient?"

"P-p-positively… peach parfaits…" Flint mumbled, still flat on the ground.

"That's the last time I send my monkeys with _you_!" Kit declared, beginning to push the peach pile out of the room and down the hallway. The monkeys skipped after him to try and salvage as many of the treats as they could.

"Peachy…" Flint managed to mutter, right before he passed out.

…

After his quarters had been destroyed, Obi-Wan knew that it was time for an extreme makeover. So, with Satine as his design advisor and Sally as his assistant giraffe, he marched up to the entrance to H.O.M.E.- Have One More Escalator.

"Ok, ok," Obi-Wan said excitedly, "roll the camera, Ki-Adi!"

Ki-Adi gave him a thumbs up and pressed record on the dinky, cheap video camera that he saved for filming the skydiving moles on Independence Day. However, since this was a special occasion, he was willing to utilize his technology.

"Hello and welcome to 'My Overly Long Exaggerated Makeover For My Home!' Or as we call it for short, MOLEMFMH." Obi-Wan adjusted his bright green and pink polka dotted tie and grinned at the camera. "We're here at Have One More Escalator to plan out our plan for planning the plan of the plan! That is, decorating and refurnishing my lovely home!"

Sally stamped her hoof on the ground and nudged Obi-Wan's arm.

"Oh, you're most certainly right, Sally!" Obi-Wan agreed. "Sally has reminded me that I should explain to you why this store is called Have One More Escalator. It is called that because it is sixty-five hundred floors high and they have a billion gazillion floors and they need one more escalator, so they tell us that we can have them!" He beamed, proud of his answer.

Satine stared at the measly, one floored building that was in front of her. "Sixty-five hundred floors, eh?"

"Oh yes! Come with me, please." Obi-Wan walked up to the door and waited for it to open. They waited there for twenty minutes.

"Honey… you gonna open the door…?" Satine asked, looking at him a bit awkwardly.

"It's an automatic door," Obi-Wan replied, waiting patiently.

They waited for another twenty minutes, and nothing happened.

Obi-Wan stared at the door, and at the little word "pull" next to the handle. He had no idea what language that was, so he just opened the door with the Force. "See, automatic."

They walked inside the little grey building, and inside, it became a majestic wonderland. The ceiling of the first floor alone was larger than the building looked outside, and a open, vortex-like tube in the middle of the room had escalators going up, and up, and up- all the way to the sixty-five hundredth floor.

"Dude," Satine breathed, staring with wide eyes.

"Alrighty, my lovely coworkers!" said Obi-Wan, plucking a short paint roller off of a rack and using it as a microphone. "Our first stop is the paint department, to find out which stunning colors we will be adorning our living space with." He walked over to the rainbow-like section of the store which had every paint color imaginable represented on short stubs of colored paper.

Aayla happened to be there too. "Man, I have all these! I want to find a new one for my crayon collection!"

Obi-Wan walked over to her. "Hello, Aayla! What are you doing?"

"I am looking for a new color for my crayon collection!" Aayla declared. "And I'm sure YOU came to steal my new crayons, DIDN'T YOU?"

"No, no, I didn't, honest!" Obi-Wan held up his hands defensively. "But… Aayla, these are paint colors… not crayons."

"Don't you READ signs, dude?" Aayla pointed forcefully to a sign that read 'Any of these wonderful paint colors can be purchased in crayon form for all you crayon obsessed people!'

"Oh." Obi-Wan read the sign. "Well, enjoy your day!"

"I certainly WILL once I can't see YOU anymore!"

"Did you get up on the wrong side of the bed?" Obi-Wan asked her.

"I ALWAYS GET UP ON THE _SAME_ SIDE OF THE BED!" Aayla screamed.

"…That explains a lot, actually," Obi-Wan muttered. "Good day!" He walked back to Satine, Sally, and Ki-Adi. "Ok, design advisor! What do you suggest?" he asked Satine.

Satine began to walk around contemplated through the aisles of rainbow paper stubs. Obi-Wan followed her elatedly, and Ki-Adi continued filming. Sally wandered off to look at the printed rugs.

After hours of searching, Satine and Obi-Wan finally narrowed their decision down to three colors; ugly road grey, over accentuated neon puke, and depressingly boring blue.

Obi-Wan paged back and forth between the colors. "I have made my decision," he announced, and everyone listened intently. "Peach!"

"Um… Obi Dear, I thought you specifically threw the peach color sheet on the ground in disgust," Satine said to him.

"I have never done such a thing," Obi-Wan stated. "Twenty buckets of paint, in lovely peach hue!"

After loading paint into a shopping cart, the group went up several floors to the drapery and carpeting section. Obi-Wan goggled at the vast selection of curtains in every shade, type, and material. There were sparkly purple ones, drab brownish ones, and ones made of red-dyed rancor skin. There were short ones and long ones and ones that were meant to hang on rocks.

But it didn't take him long to find the ones he wanted. "OOOOH! My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic curtains!"

"You're really gonna go with that…?" Satine asked, watching Obi-Wan smooth his fingers over the patterned material.

"Yes! It has Pinkie Pie on it!"

"…..Ok…."

That being done, they went up one more floor to the carpet.

"Now, what sort of carpet would go well with peach," Satine said, mostly to herself, as they looked around.

"Deary, we don't want a color that matches," Obi-Wan stated. He picked out a totally wild bright green carpet in a long, fluffy style. "Like this one!"

Satine rolled her eyes a bit but moved on.

They got on yet another long escalator. Obi-Wan turned to Ki-Adi's camera. "Now we go up a billion feet to the furniture level! We will find so much awesome stuff to decorate my quarters with, it will just be lovely!"

After many, _many_ more long minutes in the furniture section, Obi-Wan managed to decide on a purple couch, a mismatch of rainbow colored chairs, a black table, a couple maroon easy chairs, a little old-fashioned box TV, a kangaroo pillow, several paintings of candy canes and fairies, and a manly men stereo system complete with a CD of classical music.

"There's only one thing missing," Obi-Wan said as they rolled fifteen carts into the check out line.

"And what's that?" Satine asked, lugging the cart with the couch in it behind her.

"A sign that says OBI-WAN'S MAN CAVE."

Satine rolled her eyes. "I'm sure you can make one with some paper and a marker."

"Good idea."

And after spending another couple hours checking out and loading everything into Ki-Adi's bulldozer, they went home and began the redecorating process.

**That concludes chapter 10 of A Not-So-Normal Week 4! Review, ask questions, like our Facebook page, and if you want- even leave a suggestion for future chapters ;) ~Bluesaber3**


	11. Superheroes in Tights and Bowties

**HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN!? D: How long! Someone tell me! What year is it?! Oh, oh, ok, good; thank you. I suppose it's only been THREE WHOLE MONTHS. I'm so terribly sorry it has taken me this long to update! Summer was crazy, and it only got crazier once school started. I'm not sure how long it will be before I get the next chapter up, but I very sincerely promise that I will make it my greatest effort to update sooner than 3 months.**

**I've looked at the reviews and I can't seem to find any questions... if you have a new question or if I've neglected to answer your previous one, please just review at the end of the chapter to let me know!**

**Also, to get me out of writer's block (and I suppose it worked!) I started a new fanfiction titled "Sableflame: Jedi Exile"; check it out if you want to! ;)**

**Without further ado, here is Chapter 11!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 11: Superheroes in Tights and Bowties**

Anakin, Ahsoka, and Tommy were waiting in a room on benches as Cherry continued on to the next round of Galaxy Idol. Lux and Ian had eventually left to get in line so they could actually audition.

After a minute or two, Cherry walked out of one of the rooms slowly, looking like she was ready to burst into tears.

"Hello Cherry! How was whatever you were doing?" Anakin asked her. Cherry remained silent. "Well?"

Cherry looked up at him, her eyes beginning to mist.

"Y u sad," Anakin asked, looking at her.

Her voice couldn't go any louder than a whisper. "Th…the-ey… cut m-me…" She burst into tears.

Anakin gasped. "They cut you?! Oh my gosh are you bleeding?!"

"They cut me from the show!" she said through her sobs.

"Ohhhhh, that kind of cut. Phew." Anakin was silent for two seconds. "That's terrriiibbblleeeeee!"

Cherry covered her face with her hands, still sobbing.

"Don't worry, you can always be on my game show," Anakin told her sympathetically.

That didn't make her feel any better, and she continued to cry.

Anakin hugged her to try and help. "I was missing you anyway, we should go on a picnic with Tommy. Where is Tommy anyway…"

At that moment, Tommy ran over. "There you two are- Cherry, what happened?" He became very worried seeing her in tears. Cherry didn't respond. He waited until Anakin let go of hugging her before putting his hand on her shoulder. When Cherry didn't stop covering her face, Tommy pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her, and she cried against his chest. "It'll be ok, Cherry," he said gently.

"IT'S SO SAD!" Anakin wailed, and began to cry his eyes out.

Tommy looked briefly at Anakin before returning all his attention back to Cherry. He smoothed her hair gently with his fingers. "So what happened?"

"I just… didn't make the next round…" Cherry whispered, still upset.

An understanding look came across Tommy's face. "It's ok. It doesn't mean you aren't a good singer; because I think you're amazing."

Cherry looked up at him. "You do?"

"Of course," Tommy replied with a smile. "Nothing those judges say really matters. It's just their opinion."

"But they know singing…"

He looked straight at her. "But they don't know everyone's heart."

She looked into his eyes as he did.

"Because when _I_ hear you sing, it makes my heart smile," he said to her.

"Really?" she whispered.

Tommy's smile became a little wider. "Really."

A small smile came onto Cherry's face as well.

For a moment, Tommy hugged her tighter, then let his hands fall gently and held her hands in his.

"Thanks, Tommy," Cherry said, again only able to whisper, and felt a little better now.

"You're welcome."

Anakin had completely missed the whole thing and was still crying hysterically over Cherry getting eliminated.

"Uhhhhh… Anakin…" Tommy said, looking at him.

"What?!" Anakin cried, wailing.

"…. You can stop crying now."

"Ok!" A gleeful smile returned to Anakin's face. "Want a sandwich?"

…

"Tada!" Obi-Wan declared as he threw his mauve colored marker across the room, (where it proceeded to nearly bore a hole through Ki-Adi, but he jumped out of the way). He fumbled quickly with his manly men stereo, pressed play, and listened to the regal fanfare that came from the speakers.

Satine stared at him blankly. "What are we celebrating?"

"I finished my sign." Obi-Wan proudly displayed his paper sign, scribbled with mauve marker, that said "Obee-One's Man Cav."

"You can't even spell your own name?! What have you been learning from Anakin?" Satine cried, face palming hard and then dragging her hand down her face.

"Shhhh… it makes me look vulnerable; that way I can lure in fairies!" Obi-Wan said, and ran to retrieve his marker.

"Because of _course_ we need more mindless life forms in this place," Satine said sarcastically.

Obi-Wan didn't take the hint. "It will be lovely!" He brought his marker back to the desk and turned off the fanfare. Then he looked at Ki-Adi, who was still taping. "That concludes this episode of MOLEMFMH. Stay tuned for the next episode where we lure in fairies and sit on the half-dry painted walls and make people prints! ! ! !" He clapped excitedly. "I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi, and you're watching MOLEMFMH."

Ki-Adi turned off the camera and proceeded to clap. "Brilliant, absolutely brilliant!"

"Really. A whole episode about a stupid paper?" Satine muttered, rolling her eyes.

"The audience loves suspense," Obi-Wan stated, opening the front door and pasting his paper to the outside of it with green zebra duct tape.

"Aww we should'a put that in the show," Ki-Adi whined, looking at his little camera and pouting.

"Here, start the tape and I'll do it again," said Obi-Wan, peeling the paper and tape off the door with an awful ripping sound.

Ki-Adi grinned excitedly and started the tape. He pointed at Satine to cue her to say what she had said just a minute earlier.

She rolled her eyes. "Really, a whole episode about a stupid paper," she mumbled unenthusiastically.

Ki-Adi stopped the camera. "You're supposed to roll your eyes _after_ you say the line."

Her shoulders dropped in annoyance. "Are you serious."

"Yes, I saw you when you did it."

Satine groaned. "Fine."

Ki-Adi started the camera again.

"Really, a whole episode about a stupid paper," she mumbled again.

"Satine, you gotta _feel_ the lines, don't just say 'em, _feel_ 'em," said Ki-Adi.

"I'm saying a line about a stupid paper, why must I FEEL it?!" Satine exclaimed.

"See, like that!"

Satine groaned again. "I'm only doing this one more time."

"Then let's do it right," Ki-Adi stated, and started the camera.

"Really!" Satine began with mock enthusiasm. "A whole episode about a stupid paper?!"

Obi-Wan opened the front door, ready to say his line, and then just stared at the door. "What am I supposed to do again?"

Satine slammed her forehead on the wall.

"You say, 'the audience loves suspense,' and then tape the paper to the door," Ki-Adi told him.

"Oh, ok, I'm ready now."

Ki-Adi started the tape.

"Really… a whole EPISODE about a stupid PAPER!"

Obi-Wan burst out laughing and couldn't say his line.

Satine bit her lip and clenched her fists to keep from shouting.

"What happened, Obi-Wan?" Ki-Adi asked.

"It was funny! 'a whole _EPISODE_ about PAPER!'" He kept on laughing his head off, unable to control it.

"Do I really have to do this?" Satine asked. "You two are wasting my time, because right now I'd much rather be drinking a big tall glass of I DON'T CARE."

"What does I don't care taste like?" Ki-Adi asked curiously.

"It's a figure of speech! It means I don't care about this stupid show."

"Don't worry, honey, I've got it now, we'll be through in no time," Obi-Wan said.

Ki-Adi fingered the camera strap anxiously. "Can we start now?"

"Fine," Satine groaned.

"Aaaand… action."

"Really, a whole episode about a stupid paper?!"

Obi-Wan opened the door and stuck the paper to the door. "The audience loves… spaghetti…"

"Suspense, Obi-Wan, it's suspense," Ki-Adi reminded him.

"Oh, oh, right, I'm sorry."

Satine face palmed.

"From the top." Ki-Adi restarted the tape.

"Really! A whole episode about a stupid paper?!"

Obi-Wan stared at the door and noticed he hadn't taken the paper down. "Uhh… the paper's still there."

Satine, very frustrated, stomped over to Obi-Wan, tore the paper off the door and slapped it onto his face. She looked into the camera. "I know you wanna know what happened but you never will. WE KNOW HOW MUCH YOU LOVE SUSPENSE. Ki-Adi-, CUT SCENE."

Ki-Adi turned off the camera and applauded them. "That was much more dramatic than the first draft!"

Obi-Wan gingerly tried to pry the tape-covered paper off his face. "I think I will not have eyebrows after this…"

"Well, it's not like the audience needs to know," Satine countered, still annoyed, "they _love suspense_."

…

We interrupt this program for an urgent message from everyone's favorite friendly neighborhood bounty hunter, Cad Bane:

"Do you hate going to the dentist? I know I hate going to the dentist, and that's why I've created De-Active-Ate, the only substance clinically proven to prevent dentists from touching your pearly whites and living to tell about it. This breakthrough formula combines toxic fumes with minerals like gun powder, bacteria, and sulfuric acid to preserve your teeth for the next couple millennia. Don't consult your dentist before using this product. De-Active-Ate is not for individuals over the age of 592. Do not use De-Active-Ate if you have a history of dying. Side effects may include coma, death, yellowing or reddening of the teeth, and minor headaches. Order now to get a lifetime supply of De-Active-Ate for only seven hundred easy payments of 29.99, plus the cost of shipping and handling. Call now!"

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.

…

Anakin, Cherry, Tommy, and Ahsoka were still hanging around the Galaxy Idol audition place when Ian came out from his audition, looking half dead.

"…What are you doing here?" Tommy asked.

"I tried out," Ian said.

"Oh. How did it go?"

"Weeeeell, I made it to the first round, and then they went deaf or something because they cut me!" Ian exclaimed.

"I think you could make anyone deaf," Anakin said excitedly.

Ian frowned, offended by Anakin's remark. "You think it was MY fault they couldn't see a good singer in front of them?"

"It was a compliment!" Anakin said, keeping the same excited expression.

"You give lousy compliments."

Anakin squealed. "Thank you!"

Cherry was irritated. "Would you get out of here?"

"Me?" Anakin asked, looking sad.

"No, not you, him," said Cherry.

"Oh, good!" Anakin was now smiling again.

"Yeah, get out of here, squid guy," Ian stated, waving his hands as if trying to shoo Tommy away.

"I- I don't think she was talking to me…" Tommy mumbled, intimidated.

"Not him, YOU!" Cherry shouted.

"Me? ?" Ian exclaimed.

"YES!"

Tommy shrank back and hid because he didn't want to get himself involved in this.

"Well, I haven't given up yet, princess," Ian stated. "Where's Lux…" He walked away to find his friend.

Cherry watched him leave, frustrated.

Tommy sighed with relief.

"Let's go and get donuts!" Anakin cried. "I love donuts! Especially donut sandwiches!"

Cherry sighed. "Ok."

So Anakin marched off towards the donut shop, and Tommy took Cherry's hand and smiled.

…

After everyone got donuts, they began to walk home, but Anakin got sidetracked by a costume shop and deserted the rest of the group without their knowledge of it. The rest of them kept on walking, so Anakin was free to search the costume shop freely.

"Ooooooooooooh," he said in awe as he stared wide-eyed at the aisles and aisles of costumes. It was just about the time of year for costume shops to be in full stock, but Anakin didn't realize this. "Oh goodie they must have put all these here just for me! It's soon my birthday in 2 months! I must get everyone I know to buy me gift cards from here!"

He began to browse the aisles, and found a costume that he was particularly fond of. "Darth Vader!" But after a moment of scanning the item, he realized it was not Darth Vader at all. "Darth Vader with… pointy ears and muscles?" He looked at the tag. It was simple enough for him to be able to read. "Batman! Oh, that is a cool name. Imagine everyone calling you Batman," he turned to a store worker who was placing feathered tiaras on a shelf, "wouldn't it just be SWEET if everyone called you Batman?!"

"…Uh… sure, man. I guess?"

"I would like to buy this Batman!" Anakin declared. "And I would like to put it on right away!"

"Can't you just wait until you get home?"

"Nu-uh. Needz to put it on right away."

"Fine."

After a few minutes, Anakin had purchased and put on the costume (luckily there was a dressing room). "I'M BATMAN!" he declared loudly, and ran out of the store and down the street, causing three car crashes and nearly getting hit by a semi.

He ran all the way home and found everyone wondering where the heck he went. "HI GUYS I'M BATMAN NOW I'M OFF TO MEET MY COUSIN AT THE JUNKYARD SEE YA! ! ! ! !" He ran away again.

Ahsoka blinked and stared with a straight face. Cherry nearly passed out in shock. Tommy actually did.

Anakin marched all the way to the junkyard, where his cousin Peter was already waiting for him.

"OH. MY. GOOSEBERRIES." Peter ran over to him and marveled at the costume. "YOU'RE BATMAN."

"I know! ! ! ! Isn't it EPIC?!" Anakin twirled around in circles. "I've always wanted to be Batman."

"I wanna be Batman too," Peter whined.

"Doesn't Batman have an assistant?" Anakin asked.

Peter thought for a moment. "Yeah… he's named after a bird, right?"

"Oh! Yeah! It's…. uh… GOOSE."

Peter's face lit up in excitement. "I get to be Goose?!"

"Mm hm, yes, oh yes, most definitely Goose. You are Goose. Hello, Goose."

"HI BATMAN!"

"What do Batman and Goose do?" Anakin asked, not actually knowing anything about Batman.

"I think they prank people," Peter replied.

"Like… putting soap in the syrup bottle!" Anakin clapped his hands excitedly and pulled the mask down further on his face because it was pulling up and making his nose look funny. He scratched his head. "This mask makes my hair press into my eyes."

"Then why don't _you_ be goose and I'll be Batman," Peter suggested.

"NUUU! NEVAH! I am Batman and you are not!"

Peter sniffed, looking about to cry. "I always thought you were a nice cousin! After all the times I've given you ham, you can't let me be Batman just this once?"

"Those hams tasted like honey and salt! They were dastardly delicious!" Anakin licked his lips and nearly licked his mask. "Oh, ew, that did not taste like honey and salt."

"You contradict yourself! Why, Anakin, why?! I loved you, Anakin! You were my cousin! ! !" Peter wailed, dropping to his knees.

"What? I still am your cousin, Petey." Anakin looked down at his cousin. "And I am way more immature than you, so you can tell your mom that I am a good influence!"

"YOU MAKE NO SEEENSSEEEEE!" Peter burst out in tears.

"Dude. We're gonna prank people. It'll be fun. Like stuffing ice cream in each others' ears. It'll be like old times!" Anakin clapped again and thought of his childhood where he saw Peter once every 2 years.

Peter stood up, completely composed. "I thought for sure you'd fall for that." He cleared his throat. "Anywho, yeah, let's go prank people!"

…

Ventress was walking along the sidewalk, minding her own business, when suddenly she saw a sign that said, "Pink lemonade is for people who like pink lemonade. Buy cheese."

Anakin jumped out of nowhere, in front of Ventress. "HI BALDY!" Then he ran away.

Peter slipped on a banana peel and accidentally sent a large raccoon to the hospital. That took about an hour of their time, trying to go through insurance and such, when Peter didn't actually _have_ insurance, so it kinda took longer to scrub the banana goo off the ground to raise money for the raccoon's hospital bill. Luckily, the raccoon was only a toy, but the owner of said toy was judicious. Eventually, they were able to go home.

They found a note inside from Ahsoka, Cherry, and Tommy that stated that they had gone out for dinner so that they could get some peace and quiet. This left the entire place alone to Anakin and Peter.

"I think we should make grilled cheese for dinner," said Peter. He adjusted his glasses and brushed his light brown hair out of his eyes.

"I don't have any cheese. I only have unicorn meat, dead animals that Cherry eats, and a billion jars of pickles. Oh, and bread. Lots of bread. And TATER TOTS!" Anakin ran into the kitchen.

Suddenly, the Eleventh Doctor appeared out of nowhere. Ok, maybe it wasn't out of nowhere, maybe he came from the TARDIS. Anakin and Peter will never know for sure.

"You know what you need?" he asked, straightening his bow tie.

"NO, WHAT DO WE NEED!" Anakin and Peter exclaimed in unison.

"Fish fingers," said the Doctor, frantically searching through the freezer, "and custard."

_Twenty minutes later…_

The fish fingers took a bit to heat up in the microwave. Anakin and Peter watched the spinning plate as if they had never seen such an amazing device in their lives. The Doctor was watching _them_, periodically scanning them with his screwdriver and wondering why in the galaxy they were so fascinated by it.

Just a few short minutes more, and the three men were sitting around the kitchen table, eating fish fingers. And custard.

"This is even better than tater tots!" Anakin cried, stuffing his mouth full of custard-coated fish.

Peter nodded, licking all the custard off of his and not actually eating the fish. He proceeded to repeat this. "It's even better than apples!"

"Oh I _hate_ apples," the Doctor remarked, making a face.

"I hate canned avocadoes," Peter said. "Who even does that?"

Anakin smiled sheepishly and stuffed more fish fingers into his mouth. "Well, I hate it when people take rolls of double-sided tape, and stick them to all the trees in the cupcake tree farm. It's like, hey, tape doesn't grow on trees!"

"And yet cupcakes do?" asked the Doctor.

"Yes! My favorite is the bright green colored sour lime ones. They make your mouth feel all icky! But it's worth it," Anakin said, though needless to say, no one could understand him with his mouth full of fish fingers. Custard dripped from his chin.

"Anakiiiiin, you're being gross!" Peter whined, throwing a wadded up napkin at him.

"What's this for," Anakin picked up the napkin and threw it at the Doctor, "catch!"

Soon, they were all playing a game of catch with the napkin, and soon it became catch the fish fingers, and then see-who-can-get-covered-in-more-custard, and then who-can-make-the-prettiest-castle-out-of-fish-fingers, and then I-wonder-what-would-happen-if-we-poured-all-the-leftover-custard-off-the-balcony.

The last game ended abruptly in a lecture from Master Window. "Don't you _know_ that Tuesdays are Stand Outside on the Balcony in a Fez Days?! It is unacceptable to pour custard off the balcony on Tuesdays!"

"Fezzes are cool;" the Doctor remarked.

"But, it isn't Tuesday, Master Window," said Anakin.

"It will be sometime this week!" Window exclaimed. "Don't _you_ ever practice for Stand Outside on the Balcony in a Fez Day?!"

"I never have, but I'll be certain to do so now that I'm aware of it," said the Doctor.

"_Thank you_," Master Window said.

They all stood in silence for a few minutes.

Peter was still hungry. "Hey, Window, you want some fish fingers and custard?"

**Liv and I had a whole conversation about the Doctor and how we're gonna make TARDIS cookies for our friend's birthday... we're going to eat fish fingers and custard for lunch on Wednesday. That inspired the end of this chapter! Love the Doctor... he fits well here I think. ;p**

**REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW! :3**


	12. Tricks and Treats

**Happy Halloween! If you remember 2 years ago, the last chapter of NSNW1 was posted on Halloween! Don't be afraaaaid though, because this is not by any means the last chapter of NSNW4! However, it is long enough to be 2 chapters, but I decided to give you a treat, not a trick! :D**

**QUESTION TIMEEE!**

**JessJess asked: "will there be more cad bane in the next chapter?" Answer: Um yes, he will show up once, very subtle-ly. look out for him ;)**

**TalonWolfJedi asked/said: "i kinda forgot who Ian is... i still think in my mind he is very musculair O_O Is Ahsoka gonna have a coffe attack again? whats TARDIS?" Answer: You're absolutely right, Ian is very muscular. He's an OC who belongs to Liv. Ahsoka may have a coffee attack again, in the future possibly ;) the TARDIS is the Doctor's time machine :)**

**NSNW FAN asked: "Please let the Doctor stick around for a bit? He fits well on the NSNW scene :D" Answer: I think so too! He's for sure here for this chapter, and may pop up again soon ;)**

**Alright, without further ado, read chapter 12! If you dare... :D xDDD**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 12: Tricks and Treats**

Met with utter blackness, he tried to open his eyes, but found his eyelids to be very heavy. After a moment or two, his eyelids finally gave in and opened, only to find the blurry sight of twenty-two pink circus moneys staring straight at him like a group of younglings watching a holomovie. It was even weirder after his vision cleared

"AAAAAHHHHH! ! ! ! !"

"Flint, Flint, calm down," Kit soothed him, appearing next to the bed.

Flint looked over to him, only now realizing his surroundings. Everything was extremely white. His voice fell to a terrified squeak. "Am I dead?!"

"No, you're not dead, we brought you to the hospital," Kit explained. "I felt bad for just ditching you like that because obviously it was the monkeys' fault you bought all that stuff, not yours, and I should have known better. So I came back and found you passed out on the floor, with Yoda drawing fake tattoos on you with kiddie markers."

"Wait, what?!" Flint tried to scramble up and find a mirror, but Kit pushed him back down.

"It's alright, it came off pretty easy; the doctors cleaned it up."

Flint relaxed a little. "So… why am I in the hospital again?"

"You had a mental breakdown classified as a side effect to P.E.A.C.H disorder. That stands for 'Perfectly Effective At Creating Hallucinations'-"

"PEACHES?! WHERE!" Flint again tried to get up, this time to run away, set off by the word "peach."

"Yes, see, exactly! Your brain flips out over any mentioning of the word 'peach'-"

"PEACHESSS! ! ! !" Flint started hyperventilating and then passed out again.

"There's gotta be a medication for that," Kit mumbled. "C'mon, monkeys, visit time is over!"

The monkeys all pouted and sulked out the door, obviously having hoped that Flint would have given them more sugar.

Kit passed by the front desk on the way out to see if they had any other updates on Flint's overall condition.

The man at the front desk was playing coffee shop with a bunch of action figures. "Oh my goodness! That coffee is very hot! Please blow it off first- phew phew phew," he looked up and noticed Kit staring at him with his mouth open. "Ahem, uhhhh…. Can I help you?"

"Ummmm… I was wondering if you've got any updates… on Flint Cupcake…?"

The man at the desk shoved all his little toys off the desk and cleared his throat loudly. "Flint Cupcake! Let's see now… ah, yes; he's the one with P.E.A.C.H. disorder, yeah?"

"That's him," Kit replied, peering over on the ground at the action figures.

"DON'T YOU EVER HAVE FUN WHILE YOU WORK!?" The worker exclaimed, sobbing loudly.

Kit face palmed. "I only want to know what condition my cousin is in. Then you can get back to your… coffee shop…"

"Ok!" The worker quickly pulled up a file and printed it out, then shoved it into Kit's hands. He proceeded to pick up his toys and set them up again.

Kit walked over to the couches in the lobby, his monkeys trailing behind him. He sat down and began to read the paper, and quickly realized that this paper was for a different patient. "What…?"

He didn't even bother to go back to the counter, but instead ran to the room number stated on the file. He walked into the room, and found this paper to be correct.

"Master Window- I mean, Windu?! What happened to you?" Kit cried, walking into the room.

"Skywalker, a freak was glasses, and a super-freak with a lighty-up stick gave me poison! ! !" Mace wailed.

The nurse in the room was looking over his vital signs. "It wasn't poison, sir-"

"MASTER. It's MASTER. WINDU. Get it right!"

"Sorry, _Master Windu_; it wasn't poison. You've had a severe allergic reaction to fish."

"Fish, poison, what's the difference," Mace mumbled.

Cad Bane appeared. "You need De-Active-Ate!"

"DO NOT, LOSER, GET LOST."

Cad Bane burst out in tears and ran away.

Kit cleared his throat. "Ma'am," he said to the nurse, "are you sure this isn't a mental hospital…?"

"WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING, FISTO?!" Mace shouted.

"Um yeah, Mace, take your medicine. The one for your allergy _and_ a couple chill pills!" Kit left the room. A couple monkeys stayed behind swinging on poles until they realized he was gone and quickly hurried after him.

…

"C'MON CHERRY AND TOMMY AND AHSOKA AND PETER AND MR. DOCTOR IT'S HALLOWEEN TODAY SO WE'RE GONNA GO TO THE COSTUME SHOOOOPPP!" Anakin declared the next morning at breakfast. He had absolutely insisted that Peter and the Doctor stay overnight, so they did.

"You've already _got_ a costume," Ahsoka told him, sounding annoyed and ready to stick her face in her coffee-flavored oatmeal.

"Well it isn't good enough. I need a better one. And you all need costumes too!" Anakin stated.

The Doctor was frowning. "It's not Mr. Doctor, it's just the Doctor. Please."

"Oh sorry Doctor!" Anakin exclaimed.

"I don't wanna go to the costume shop," Tommy whimpered. "Too many scary things!"

"It'll be ok, Tommy, just don't look at them," Cherry soothed him. It wasn't like she actually wanted to go, but at least she could keep Tommy in the little kids costume aisle away from the spooky stuff.

"I'm going to be a pineapple!" Peter announced, bouncing on his chair excitedly. His glasses slid off his nose and fell onto his waffle. "Awww…"

The Doctor came over and buzzed the glasses with his sonic screwdriver. "There."

"That… didn't do anything," Peter said.

"Sure it did."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"DID TOO."

"DID NOT!"

"DID TOO!"

"Guys!" Ahsoka shouted, rolling her eyes. "For crying out loud, you're two grown men fighting over a flashlight. Get a life!"

Peter sobbed. "I'm only eighteen!"

"It is not a flashlight, it's a _sonic screwdriver_." The Doctor popped the screwdriver back into his pocket.

"Can we pleeeease leave?" Anakin whined.

"Just go by yourself, dude," Ahsoka told him.

"No. We go all together, or not at all!"

"I vote not at all."

"I vote all together!"

Ahsoka groaned. "Ok. Who votes we go all together?"

Peter, Anakin, and the Doctor raised their hands.

"Who votes not at all?"

Ahsoka, Cherry, and Tommy raised their hands.

"Oh great. It's a tie."

Anakin clapped. "In case of a tie, win goes to the party who suggested the event! C'MON PEEPS!" He marched out the door with Peter and the Doctor following behind.

Ahsoka groaned again. "Fine." She picked up her purse and trudged after them.

Tommy nearly cried, but Cherry just took his hand and reluctantly followed as well.

…

Yoda was walking along with Bernie on Thread Street, which is near an outdoor shopping mall and had a bunch of cute shops and cafes. Right now, he had a big long list of things he needed for the annual Jedi Temple Halloween Party.

He stopped short in front of a candy shop and Bernie nearly fell down a sewage drain. "Candy shop, here is," he said, looking up at the colorful sign, festively decorated in fake cobwebs and plastic spider droids.

Bernie clapped. "Goodie!"

Yoda reached for the door handle, but he couldn't get it. It was up too high. Undefeated, he used the Force and strolled on in. Bernie was about to follow but got hit by the door and was now stuck outside.

"Nooooo!"

"BERNIEEE!" Yoda opened the door again and Bernie hopped inside. "Yay!"

Bernie was happy now, so they began to browse the candy filled aisles of wonderland.

Yoda looked at his list. "Need, we do, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, and sugar." He picked out sugary walnuts, gummy mushrooms, chocolate billboards, cupcake flavored candy powder, bags and bags of candy asparagus (it's like candy corn, but, more asparagus-y.), grape and orange candy necklaces for everyone, a gigantic tub of caramel for dunking people and making caramel corndogs, a handful of sticky blue sugar strips, pickled oatmeal cookies, toothpaste flavored bubblegum in the shape of rocks, and a couple lollypops.

He bought these lovely confections and skipped out of the store with Bernie on his shoulder.

General Grievous also happened to be at the candy shop. He was on vacation from being evil, and the candy shop was his favorite place to go when he had free time.

He randomly happened to spot the jar labeled "lollypops" just a few seconds after Yoda had left the store.

"My favorite candy!" he exclaimed, and opened the jar. He tried to get the lollypops out but his hand wouldn't fit in the jar. So he started shouting and screaming and trying to break the jar open.

The store clerks were staring at him very awkwardly. Even more awkwardly than they had just been staring at Yoda.

"Um… excuse me, sir…?" One of the store workers went up to him.

"WHAT DO YOU WANT?!" Grievous screamed at him.

The store worker, whose name was Fredrick, cowered away slightly. "W-would you like some help with the c-candy jar?"

Grievous set down the jar and crossed his arms like a stubborn five-year-old. "No. I can do this all by myself."

"Are you sure about that?" Fredrick asked timidly.

"YES NOW LEAVE ME ALONE."

Fredrick ran behind the counter of the store and hid.

Grievous looked at the tiny jar. Inside there were three red lollypops, two blue lollypops, six yellow lollypops, and one purple one.

_I must get the purple one. Grape is my favorite flavor. I will not be defeated by a glass jar,_ Grievous thought to himself.

Fredrick watched in extreme fear from behind the counter.

Finally Grievous decided to just throw the jar on the ground and slice it into a million little pieces with his lightsabers. All the lollypops except for the purple one were disintegrated into puddles of colored melted sugar.

Fredrick fainted.

Grievous then stepped in the puddle of sugar and got stuck.

"SOMEONE HELP MEEEE!"

No answer.

"HELP ME."

Still no answer.

"I WILL DESTROY YOU ALL!"

Everyone in the shop came and dumped soap on his foot and he was out in two seconds.

Grievous then destroyed them all and took his grape lollypop home.

Dooku watched Grievous walk through the door trying to lick the lollypop through his mask.

It was an endless process. Grievous bangs lollypop against mask, lollypop sticks to mask, Grievous tries to un-stick lollypop from mask, Grievous fails, Grievous gets frustrated and freaks out, Grievous finally gets lollypop off of mask, this process repeats about a hundred times.

Dooku finally got annoyed and left the room.

Grievous realized that he wasn't going to be able to eat the lollypop, so he decided it would be his pet and his new best friend. He named it Georgie.

"Georgie, you are my best friend!" Grievous exclaimed and he skipped into the hanger where Cad Bane (who had been hired by Sidious to go to Target and buy soup) was loading stuff onto a ship.

Bane stared at him as he skipped along. "Um… General… what are you doing?"

"Playing with my best friend Georgie!" Grievous hugged his lollypop.

"…Nice…?" Bane tried to go back to loading stuff into the ship, but couldn't get rid of the stunned confusion he had from seeing Grievous.

"Well, I'm going to go ask Count Dooku if he would like to admire my lollypop!" Grievous said to Bane, and he skipped away.

Bane stared for a moment longer before fainting.

Grievous skipped along trying to find Dooku.

He couldn't find Dooku, but he did pass by a room and heard Sidious's voice from inside.

"Yeah, that's right… a little more to the left… a little more to the right… yeah, right there… perfect…"

Grievous walked in and saw Sidious laying on a table getting a massage from a couple droids.

"Master, look! I have a new friend!"

"GRIEVOUS! What are you doing in my private chambers?" Sidious asked him.

"Showing you my wonderful friend Georgie," said Grievous, holding up his lovely little purple lollypop.

"But how did you get in?"

"You left the door open."

"…Oh…"

"Well, I'm going to find Count Dooku!" Grievous waltzed merrily away.

Eventually, he found Dooku at a fast food restaurant ordering breakfast for fun.

"Ah, Grievous, there you are," said Dooku, taking a sip of his poorly prepared coffee.

"I've been looking for you forever, Count." Grievous pulled out his lollypop. "I brought Georgie so we can admire the wonderful sweet purple candy."

"Eh…" Dooku ate his breakfast sandwich. "I was thinking it'd be more fun to like, attack the Republic people or something. Or maybe skydive. Skydiving's fun."

"OOOOOOOOH ATTACKING!" Grievous danced around in circles and threw his lollypop across the room, where it stuck to the door. Several of the people in the restaurant freaked out and one of them called 911.

Less than five seconds later the police droids arrived and accused Grievous of disrupting a peaceful public eating place.

Dooku destroyed them all and stated that it was his goal to destroy peace anyway, and he left.

Grievous made sure to retrieve his lollypop from the door with much effort before following Dooku.

So they planned to destroy the Republic people and blah, blah, blah. Blah.

…

Meanwhile, Anakin had arrived at the costume shop with all his friends. Obi-Wan had tagged along too, even though he insisted on wearing his candy cane costume that he had thus far worn nine years in a row. But what the heck.

Tommy refused to even step inside the shop.

"C'mon, Tommy! It's just a couple fluffy spiders and a happy zombie!" Anakin looked into the shop at all the decorations. But when he looked inside, what he saw surprised him. "Wait… huh?!"

The entire costume shop was covered in Christmas decorations. In October.

Anakin marched into the shop, outraged. "Y U DECORATE FOR CHRISTMAS WHEN IT ISN'T EVEN NOVEMBER?!"

The store worker was undeterred by Anakin's deviancy. "Boss says we're gonna put up Christmas decorations earlier and earlier every year. Next year, we're going for March. WOOHOO!"

"I love Christmas," said the Doctor happily.

"But…" Anakin pouted, "are you still selling costumes?"

"Yeah. They're way in the back on clearance." The store worker went back to threading popcorn onto licorice strings.

Obi-Wan was so elated he couldn't even contain himself. "IT'S OFFICIALLY CANDY CANE SEASON! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" He grabbed a cart and sped through the aisles, clearing out every single shelf of candy canes.

Tommy finally decided to look inside. "Oh, it's a happy place," he whispered, content.

"Come oooon to the costumes!" Anakin dragged Tommy with him to the back of the store, ignoring his constant pleas for mercy.

Cherry rolled her eyes and followed.

The Doctor was already in the back, contemplating a lovely fez. Ahsoka was looking at ninja costumes.

Peter suddenly ran over to them, literally crying with happiness. "They have a pineapple costume!"

Anakin looked for 5 minutes and had picked out ten costumes already. He was piling them in a little basket.

Tommy found a warm grey kitty costume and decided to be that.

Ahsoka decided that she absolutely HAD to be a ninja. It only made sense, in her mind.

Cherry looked at the costumes, but decided that she already had her wolf ears and tail, so that would be enough of a costume for her.

The Doctor bought a fez. That was it.

Anakin eventually made it to the counter with five baskets of costumes.

"You're kidding me," Ahsoka said with a face palm. "You can't wear all of those."

"Just watch me!" Anakin dumped the piles onto the conveyor belt and paid for them all. Everyone else bought theirs as well. It took Obi-Wan forty-five minutes just to unload and pay for all his candy canes.

They went home, and less than five minutes later it looked like a theater costume and prop room got hit by a tornado and exploded all over the living room. Anakin had bought everything that was in his size, and almost everything that wasn't. He had at first only been trying to decide between a giant kazoo and a fluff monster, but then he added a tailor, a sailor, and a mail man to those options. Then it came to an ice cream cone and a pink dog bone, and a yellow car and a purple star, and a tube of paint and a log that was quaint, and a piece of candy and a horse named Mandy, and a bat or a cat or a rat or a mat or a hat or a flat gnat, and a moose. But he just couldn't decide. So he had bought them all.

"I'm serious, there's no way you can wear all those," Ahsoka told him again, watching as he stared at all of them while the Doctor and Peter played catch-the-sharp-rock outside on the balcony.

"Batman can do anything!" Anakin exclaimed. "Even ballet dance!"

"Well then," Ahsoka countered, "it's too bad you're not really Batman."

The light and excitement in Anakin's eyes shattered into a billion little Anakin shaped pieces and sprinkled out lifelessly. "I'm not?"

"Of course not! Did you really think dressing up in a stupid black leotard and ski mask would make you a superhero?" Ahsoka was so annoyed with him.

_CRASH! ! !_ "Ohhh man, I'm so sorry!" Peter's voice came from outside. "That doesn't look good…."

"Oh don't worry, we'll just reset! Try it again," said the Doctor.

_CRASHHH!_

Ahsoka finally stormed out onto the balcony. "What in the galaxy are you two doing!?"

"We're playing catch-the-sharp-rock," said Peter. He held up the Doctor's sonic screwdriver.

"It's my favorite app!" the Doctor exclaimed happily. "You throw an sharp rock to each other and when you miss you get crash points! But sometimes it crashes in a lame way. C'mon Peter try again!"

"WOOHOO!" _CRAAASH!_

Ahsoka heaved a sigh of relief and went back inside, finding Anakin bawling his eyes out with Cherry trying to ask him what's wrong.

"AHSOKA TOLD ME I'M NOT REALLY BATMAN!" Anakin wailed miserably.

"You thought you were really Batman…?" Cherry really didn't think that Anakin would actually believe that.

Anakin sobbed harder. "I THOUGHT YOU'D UNDERSTAND!" He ran out of the front door, down the hall, and to Obi-Wan's place to tell him what happened.

…

Yoda was now at the grocery store to get things for snacks. He bought the entire freezer of corndogs and went home. Bernie fainted.

…

"What are we going to do if Anakin doesn't come back?" Ahsoka asked Cherry as they sat on the costume covered couch.

"Go to the Halloween party without him, I guess," said Cherry. "He'll probably come anyway, and we'll see him there."

"We should do something, though. I didn't really think he _really_ thought he was Batman," Ahsoka replied.

"Neither did I."

"YES! HIGH SCORE!" screamed the Doctor.

Rex climbed over the side of the balcony. "YOU STOLE MY LINE!"

"Well you stole my… no, you didn't steal my accent, still got that and yours is different… yes… you stole my… YOU STOLE MY APPLE. But I hate apples, so you can have it!" The Doctor patted Rex on the head reassuringly.

Rex just frowned and went inside. "I'm being a marshmallow for Halloween," he announced.

"Sweet," Ahsoka quipped, laughing.

"Ahh, good one."

Suddenly, Lux and Ian showed up and burst in, breaking yet another door. "So, we heard about a Halloween party going on, yes?" Lux asked Ahsoka, winking at her.

Ian looked at the door, somehow feeling this had happened before. "You should get that fixed."

"Oh for Pete's sake," Ahsoka murmured.

"WHAT ABOUT MY SAKE!" Peter shouted.

"Shut up!" Ahsoka called back. "Are you two gonna be there? Cuz I think I just made up some other plans." She glared at them.

"You two really need to chill out," Ian said. "You've never even given us a chance."

"You haven't given us a reason to," Cherry shot back. "Get out of here before I have to shove you out again."

"You don't have the right to shove us out, you don't own this place. Anakin does," Lux argued.

"Well you don't have the right to be here in the first place!" Ahsoka exclaimed.

Montana suddenly strolled in through the open door, eating a candy apple. "Hey y'all! I just picked up sum candy apples, ya want any?"

"I hate apples!" called the Doctor.

"I'll have one!" Peter exclaimed. "I love apples!"

"I used to think that too, and then, I ate one," the Doctor murmured.

"The'ar sweet 'n juicy, with a crunchy coatin' of candy," Montana said, holding up the basket of red candy apples as Peter scrambled through the maze of costumes to get to her.

"Yummmyyyy," he cooed, licking the outer coating of the candy. His eyes fluttered with pleasure.

"Wher's Anakin?" Montana asked, looking around. "I'd be sure he'd want one."

"He ran away because we told him he isn't really Batman," Ahsoka said.

"Aww, poor Anakin." Montana looked concerned. She turned to stare at the broken door. "Y'should get that there door fixed."

"I said it first," Ian pointed out.

"Yeah well she said it with a cooler accent," Peter stated.

Ahsoka suddenly got an idea. "Hey Montana… could you please get Lux and Ian out of here and warn them to never come back unless they wanna get beat up by you?"

Montana frowned a little. "Why would I beat 'em up? Ar they causin' sum sorta trouble?"

"YES. MAKE THEM LEAVE."

"We haven't done any harm," Lux said. "We're only trying to win the hands of these lovely ladies."

"Yeah? Both of 'em ar already datin', and one of 'em's datin' _my_ cousin." Montana balled on hand into a fist and punched it lightly into the palm of her other hand. She turned to Ahsoka. "I'll make sure these two ain't causin' y'all trouble no more."

"Thank you," Ahsoka said, relieved.

Montana easily threw Lux out of the doorframe. Ian, however, put up resistance. "Look, I don't know who you think you are, but I'm not gonna let myself get pushed around by a girl."

"We'll see 'bout that." Montana grabbed his shoulders, and, taking him by surprise with her strength, shoved and kicked him out the door.

Lux was terrified. "Let's get out of here!"

"After _that_?!" Ian exclaimed. "No way, man. They can't even lock the door on us."

"Don't make me hurt y'all, boys," Montana said to them, standing in the doorway with her arms crossed.

"C'mon man, we need to regroup!" Lux pleaded.

Ian was glaring at Montana. Finally he gave up. "Fine. But we'll be back, you can count on it!"

Lux ran away and Ian followed less enthusiastically behind him.

Montana laughed and went back inside. "I knew I could scare 'em off."

"Thank you," Ahsoka said again, breathing another sigh of relief.

"I'll leave the rest 'a them candy apples for ya," Montana said, smiling. "See y'all at the Halloween party?"

"Yep, we'll be there," said Ahsoka.

Montana grinned. "Bye!"

"Bye," said Ahsoka.

Cherry, Peter, and the Doctor said goodbye too.

"Do you think she would by any chance be interested in being my companion," the Doctor asked. "I want another ginger companion…"

Peter laughed. "Why are you calling her a piece of ginger?"

"Her hair, it's ginger," the Doctor tried to explain.

"He means redhead," Cherry said.

"Ohhhhh." Peter understood now.

"Yeah."

And the group sat in awkward silence.

…

Anakin was going on and on and on and on and on and on to Obi-Wan about all his life experiences and how all those things really led up to his emotional breakdown after finding out he wasn't Batman because he really thought his whole life that he was Batman and it just completely broke his little heart to know that he really wasn't but he always thought he had a meaningful purpose in life and maybe if he tried hard enough one day he'd be famous like Batman and that's all he ever really wanted was to have his face on a giant billboard so he could throw rocks at it and make it look like his two front teeth were missing because then he could sing the all I want for Christmas is my two front teeth song and that was always something he wanted to do because when he was little he had never heard of that song so he never got to sing it when his two front teeth were missing and he'd tried several times to get his teeth knocked out before Christmas but he kept on hearing something about them never growing back so he changed his mind and moved on to applying for a job at the local refinery but they didn't want him there because they didn't like people with the name Anakin and that was kind of racist so he just ate a cupcake and moved to New England where he realized that if he really tried he _could_ beat the sudoku games on the Saturday newspapers but only if he waited until the next week because by that time the news story would have completely moved on from the scandal of the missing flip flops and no one really cares anyway because they're all too busy eating soap.

"And that's why I really wish I was Batman!" Anakin wailed.

Obi-Wan understood completely. "I completely understand, Anakin. Some people just don't know how hard it is to have anger management issues."

"I DON'T HAVE ANGER MANAGEMENT ISSUES!" Anakin shouted.

"Maybe you should just be a candy cane for Halloween. That always makes me happy," said Obi-Wan.

Anakin stopped crying. "Ok!"

Obi-Wan looked at his filthy, overly worn-out candy cane costume. He sniffed. "This is my favorite costume in the world. I've worn it for nine years in a row. It's always been there for me when I've been sad, and it's always made me warm and fuzzy inside, especially when I would lick the tag in the back because it's bleach flavored…"

Anakin looked at him with hope beginning to return to his eyes.

"But now, I think it's time… for me to go put it back on! Hang on I'll be right back!" Obi-Wan ran into the other room to change.

Anakin burst out in tears again and sobbed hysterically.

Obi-Wan came back in two minutes. "But I have something for you too!" He gave Anakin a magnet.

Anakin read the magnet. "'Sometimes life sucks, but that's ok, you do too'?!"

"It's like my motto about potatoes and small rocks," Obi-Wan explained.

Anakin stared blankly at the magnet. "Thank you so much, Kenob's! This is literally the breakthrough I needed! Life just makes so much more sense now!"

"I knew it'd help," Obi-Wan stated, smoothing down the matted, dirt covered fabric of his candy cane costume. "Now go out, and buy a candy cane costume!"

"Nah, it's ok. I think I'm just gonna be Batman."

"Ok. Cool."

Awkward silence.

…

That night, the Halloween party was about to begin, and Yoda was setting up with Ki-Adi and Plo. They had a caramel dunking booth, a chocolate ball gun booth (like paintball, but tastier!), pin the tail on Bernie, a chocolate cake eating contest with a bottle of antacid as the prize, a sugary rainbow soda waterfall, a gigantic super-powered trampoline, a costume contest (annual, of course), and a giant rock for everyone to marvel at.

Within the next ten minutes, people started arriving, picking up food from Plo's indoor food truck that he had set up to give out the food he usually sold in his restaurant- free advertising! Soon, Jedi and all the other guests were flooding into the room. Yoda turned on the epically loud speaker and blasted cool party music.

Ahsoka walked towards the entrance to the party room and saw Anakin standing there, in his Batman costume. "Anakin! I'm so sorry about telling you that you aren't really Batman. I didn't realize I was going to make you so upset…"

Anakin smiled. "It's ok, Snips. Obi-Wan gave me a magnet and I'm ok now." He smiled.

"Really?"

"Really."

Ahsoka smiled back. "Ok then."

The Doctor strolled into the party wearing his fez. "Now this is what I call a party!"

Barriss appeared dressed as a spool of thread. "OH MY GOSH! THAT IS THE MOST REALISTIC DOCTOR COSTUME I'VE EVER SEEN!"

"Oh _you_, I remember you," said the Doctor. "Haven't you found anything else to do besides go crazy over me?"

"NO!"

"Well then. Care to join me for the party?"

"YES- wait, who are you anyway. That's an epic costume but I don't recognize you," said Barriss.

"I'm the Doctor." He took out his sonic screwdriver and clicked it to make it buzz.

"THE REAL DOCTOR!" Barriss squealed. She fainted and rolled away across the floor on her giant spool of thread.

"Well then."

Ian and Lux showed up at the party, both ready to carry out their ingenious plans. They had earlier decided that they were going to dress as the other guys, and then somehow sneak their way over to Ahsoka and Cherry when their guys were distracted. Ian was wearing a pathetic wig that didn't exactly look like Tommy's hair, but he thought it was good enough. Lux was wearing a Jedi uniform and had did his hair differently to look like Bob.

"We should split up," said Ian. He then cleared his throat and turned his voice timid and soft. "I mean, maybe we should, y'know, split up… it might be a good idea…"

Lux laughed. "You sound just like him. Yeah, we should split up."

They went their separate ways.

Ian soon accidentally ran into Montana, who was dressed as a dolphin.

"Hey Tommy!" She said, going over to him. "Why aren't ya hangin' out with Cherry?"

Ian faked his best Tommy voice. "I got separated from Cherry, could you please help me find her?"

"Sure, I saw her right over here," Montana led him over to where Cherry was watching Anakin gobble down cake after cake in the chocolate cake eating contest.

"Cherry…" Ian walked over to her and tapped her lightly.

"I thought you said you didn't want to watch this, Tommy," said Cherry, still watching Anakin.

Ian thought fast. "I didn't want to be over there all by myself," he mumbled.

"Alright." Cherry waved to Anakin and left with him. "Did you get anything to eat yet?"

"No," said Ian.

"I thought you said you were going to get something while you waited though," Cherry said, walking towards the food.

"I already told you, I didn't want to be by myself."

She looked at him. "What happened to your cat suit?"

"I… didn't want it on anymore."

"Ok…"

While Cherry walked away with Ian, Anakin finished the chocolate cake eating contest and won. Real Tommy came back.

"I… won…!" Anakin exclaimed, collapsing on the ground face-first.

"Where did Cherry go?" Tommy asked, looking around.

"I saw her leave," said Anakin.

"B-But… she said she was gonna wait for me…" Tommy whimpered, brokenhearted that Cherry would leave.

"Maybe she had to go to the bathroom," Anakin said, his voice muffled because he was face first on the floor.

Tommy realized that this was a good reason, and waited.

…

The lights at the hospital flickered. Mace was completely mortified that he had to spend his night in here instead of at the Halloween party. He had continuously fought for them to let him go, but they wouldn't. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore. "I WILL GO TO THE HALLOWEEN PARTY WHETHER THEY LIKE IT OR NOT!" he shrieked, and tore himself out of the bed, taking the IV's and the metal strips attaching him to the bed with him. He walked slowly yet forcefully, as if in a trance, and left the hospital without anyone noticing.

"ZOMBIE!" people in the streets cried, screaming and running away from Mace.

Mace growled at them angrily. "Get out of my way! And it's MASTER WINDU, not Zombie!"

"ZOMBIEEEE!"

"This is worse than the zombie fish show on TV!" wailed the ice cream man, hiding in his freezer.

Mace continued to zombie-walk to the Jedi Temple, and eventually entered the Halloween party.

Yoda hopped up on the stage. "ARRIVED, THE WINDOW HAS!"

Everyone cheered and several of them picked up Mace and carried him over to the stage while everyone else cheered and did the wave.

Yoda spun the microphone and as soon as Mace was on stage, he motioned for everyone to be quiet.

There was complete silence for seven minutes.

"ARRIVED, THE WINDOW HAS!"

Everyone started cheering again and Mace threw himself off the stage, frustrated, and headed for the soda waterfall.

…

Ian was very proud that his plan was working. He and Cherry had gotten some food and where sitting on one of the benches together. He inched closer to Cherry and put his arm around her.

Cherry was a bit shocked. "Feeling bold today, huh, Tommy?"

"Oh, um; yes, Cherry," said Ian.

"Your voice sounds funny, are you ok?" Cherry asked.

"Of course I'm ok," Ian said, trying to make it sound reassuring.

"I don't know… you sound weird in an oddly familiar way…"

"I'll prove to you that I'm totally alright," Ian pulled her towards him and kissed her full on the lips just like he had the first time he'd met her.

And just when Cherry began to think that this was all good and wonderful…

"Cherry?!" Tommy came over to them quickly, but cautiously. "Why are you kissing that person, Cherry?" He quickly became almost in tears.

Cherry recognized his real voice immediately and tore herself away from the imposter. "Tommy! ! !" She glared at the fake, wigged person. "IAN."

Ian grinned. "I knew you liked me, you were just never able to admit it in front of him!"

"THAT'S NOT TRUE." Cherry was getting angry now.

Tommy was crying. "I thought you liked me… I _love_ you…"

"Tommy- I- I'm so sorry, Ian was pretending to be you! I should've been able to tell the difference, it was all a big mistake!" Cherry exclaimed.

Tommy ran away, not being able to take it.

"Tommy!"

"The wig wasn't working for me, so I grabbed a holographic costume generator at one of the vending booths here. Worked like a charm," said Ian with a grin.

"I hate you so much," Cherry said lividly through gritted teeth. She ran off into the crowd to catch up to Tommy.

…

Peter was dancing in his pineapple costume on the stage of the costume contest, trying to impress the judges with his tropical-fruity moves. "Tada!"

"That was stupid." C3PO kicked him off the stage.

Peter pouted and went to get some candy.

…

Overall, the party was pretty great. Everyone had a great time except for Tommy, and Cherry (and Lux and Ian, whose plans miserably failed). The group came home with gigantic bags of candy. Peter had gone home, and the Doctor had to leave, so now it was just back to Anakin, Ahsoka, Cherry, and Tommy.

Tommy was still upset, and had gone straight into his room and locked the door as soon as they got home.

Cherry was miserable too, and angry at Ian for tricking her. He sure had put the 'trick' in 'trick or treat.'

"You're not the only one that got tricked," Ahsoka said to her, coming over to where Cherry sat on the couch. She took a bite of the chocolate she was eating. "Lux tried to pull the same stunt on me."

"That doesn't make a difference. At least Bob didn't have to watch you two kiss!" Cherry buried her face in her hands.

"If _either_ of them would've kissed me I would have slapped them so hard they would've needed make up to cover the red handprint," Ahsoka remarked. Cherry just sighed. "It'll be alright. He'll come around to forgiving you. He's Tommy, right? I've never even seen him mad."

"He isn't mad, he's upset. He thinks I don't really like him anymore." Cherry stared at the door to Tommy's room.

Anakin was making popcorn balls. Because that's what anyone would do after a whole night of stuffing yourself with cake, sugar, and more sugar.

"Maybe you should just tell him you love him!" he suggested, shaping the gooey popcorn into little elephants.

"He probably won't even believe me," Cherry mumbled.

"But would it be true?"

"Of course it'd be true."

"Then just let him know you sincerely love him, and let him go from there," said Anakin.

"Will that work?" Cherry asked.

"I dunno. Works whenever Padme does it to me," Anakin replied.

Cherry decided that it was at least work a try. She walked over to Tommy's door and knocked softly.

"What?" Tommy's dejected voice came from inside the room.

"Tommy, it's me, Cherry… please open the door, I want to tell you something," Cherry said gently.

There was a couple moments of silence before she could hear him move about and come to the door. The door opened a crack and Tommy peeked out, staring at her with watery, mint green eyes.

"Could I come in for a second?" Cherry asked.

Tommy looked at the ground. "I guess so," he said quietly.

Cherry went inside and closed the door behind her. "Tommy, I'm really sincerely sorry about what happened tonight. If I had known that was Ian and not you, I never would have even sat near him. But I know that it might be hard for you to get over that, so I just wanted to tell you something." She looked into his eyes. "I love you. I truly love you. I hope that you'll be able to forgive me…"

"I love you, too," Tommy whispered, gazing back at her longingly. "That's why it hurt to see you with him… but I guess I should have known that he would do something like that."

Cherry threw herself into his arms and he embraced her tightly. He cried again, this time with happy tears. He was just so glad to have her back.

After a long minute, they pulled away slightly. Mint green eyes stared into reddish maroon. Second by second their faces drew closer together, driven by a mystical and mysterious force called love that no one can really explain. Their lips were mere centimeters apart. And then…

The door burst open. "Tommyyyy! Cherryyyyy! Time for family popcorn ball night!"

Tommy and Cherry were snapped out of their loving gazes. "Anakin…!" Cherry complained.

"Come on come on come on! Out, we're going play a game while we eat them!" Anakin came in and dragged them both out.

Ahsoka was rolling her eyes. "How can you possibly be hungry after eating three whole cakes, seven hamburgers, your entire bag of candy, and a breath mint! I thought you told me you were so full you thought you were going to throw up."

"Well I did think that, but then I just ate the bottle of powder that the cake people gave me and I was ok!" Anakin said happily. He started eating a popcorn ball.

"I will never understand you."

"And I'll never understand you! We're even," Anakin said, smiling innocently.

Cherry sat on the couch, rolling her eyes as well. Tommy sat next to her.

"I think that I will call this, the bestest Halloween ever!" Anakin said, setting up the board game on the living room coffee table.

"Good for you," Ahsoka murmured.

Anakin looked very excited. "And tomorrow, we can start decorating for Christmas!"

"WHAT?!"

**What's that? You don't like cliffhangers? Well, I gave you an extra long chapter, so you can't be mad. o3o Review pleeeease! please? please? :D**


	13. Candy Cane Season

**Now that Thanksgiving is over, we can officially begin listening to Christmas music and decorating! Let's see how that goes for our friends over in A Not-So-Normal Week 4! No questions today, so, read on!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 13: Candy Cane Season**

Everyone woke up to frosty windows and chilled air that morning. Anakin was still asleep, cuddled up in his bed with his blankets wrapped around him and his stuffed unicorn in his arms. Ahsoka was awake, but on HeadNovel in bed, forgetting all about actually getting up. Cherry woke up and came into the living room, then looked out of the window and gasped. It was snowing!

She grinned excitedly and turned her head to the bedroom doors, wondering if she should go wake everyone up.

Tommy came out of his room shivering from the cold and trying to warm up with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders. He yawned and shivered a little more.

"Tommy! It's snowing!" Cherry exclaimed, waving her arm for him to come over and look.

Tommy looked afraid. "Is that good?"

"Yes!"

He sighed in relief.

Anakin came out of his room sleepily, rubbing his eye and still holding onto his unicorn doll.

"Anakin, it's snowing!" Cherry cried.

Suddenly Anakin looked completely awake and he dropped his poor unicorn doll on the ground and ran to the window, squishing his face up against it and creating big circles of steam on the window. "IT IS!" Then he realized he had dropped his unicorn doll and ran back to pick it up. "I'm so sorry, Rupert!"

Cherry stared at him blankly for a moment, then looked out the window again. She grinned brightly and ran outside into the snow.

"Cherry! Wait for me!" Tommy whimpered. He ran to the closet and put on three coats, four scarves, two pairs of mittens, really long and thick socks, and boots. Then he waddled outside after her.

Anakin put on a dumb little coat that wasn't even meant for the snow and ran out after them.

Cherry slipped in the snow. "Ahg! ! ! Cold! ! Why is it so cold?! It's never been this cold before!"

Tommy had not yet reached her at his slow, waddling pace, but eventually made it over to her. "I think it's because it's snow," he said, bending down as much as he could and holding out his heavily mitten-ed hand for her to grab.

She grabbed it and let him pull her up. "But I mean, I used to live in the snow. It didn't feel this cold."

"Maybe you had worn a coat?"

Anakin was a little ways off hitting things with sticks to watch the snow fall off.

Ahsoka finally came out of her room and realized (due to the door left ajar with cold snowy air blowing in) that everyone was outside playing in the snow. She put on her coat and went out too.

Cherry went back to the doorway, freezing, and looked out at them all.

"Wait for me," Tommy said, waddling back.

"Why is it so cold?!" Cherry practically wailed.

"Let me hug you," said Tommy, trying to hug her with all his coats on but it wasn't really working well.

"I think you've got too much on."

"No, I like being warm." He finally managed to hug her. "Are you warm now?"

"Not really. The outside of your coat is cold."

"Oh, sorry." He unzipped one coat and wrapped her in it. "Here."

"Oof,"

"Warm now?"

"A little. I'm kinda squished though."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Tommy said worriedly, taking it back off of her.

"Maybe I'll just go put my own on," said Cherry.

"Ok." Tommy tried to zip his coat back up.

Anakin was hitting a giant tree with his little stick. "It's not working!" he cried. Rupert the unicorn doll watched him from the ground, getting wet and icy.

Tommy watched him while he waited for Cherry. She came back in a minute with a coat and boots on.

Anakin started hitting it even harder. Eventually, he hit it as hard as he possibly could. The ground shook like an earthquake, and all the snow in the tree came crashing down on him, burying him completely.

"Anakin! ! !" Tommy cried worriedly.

Cherry just stared.

Ahsoka had been standing off to the side trying to play HeadNovel. "What's going on….?"

"Anakin got buried alive!" Tommy sobbed.

"He buried himself in the snow," Cherry clarified.

"Where?" Ahsoka asked, looking around.

Tommy pointed to the pile of snow under the tree.

"…..Anakin?" Ahsoka called, looking at the pile of snow.

Anakin popped out of the snow, flaky white snow clumps stuck in his hair. "WOOHOO!"

Tommy fainted.

"Tommy…!"

"That was so awesome!" Anakin exclaimed. "Everyone should try it!" He dug through the pile and retrieved Rupert. He started shaking snow out of his hair, then proceeded to make snowballs and throw them at squirrels.

"Tommy, can you hear me?" Cherry asked him.

Tommy started to wake up. "Cold…!"

Cherry helped him up.

"Thanks," he said with a shiver.

"Are you ok?"

He nodded.

"SNOWBALL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" Anakin threw snowballs at them.

"Hey!" Cherry shouted.

Tommy dropped to the ground and curled up in a ball. "We're under attack!"

Anakin scurried over to them and dropped snowballs on Tommy. "BOMBS! EXPLODEEEE."

"No! No! ! I'm too young to die!"

"Oi!" Cherry exclaimed. She scooped up a snowball and hurled it right at Anakin's face.

It hit Anakin, just like Cherry planned, and he fell backwards, snow covering his face. He pumped both arms in the air in silent victory.

Cherry just rolled her eyes and threw another snowball at him.

Anakin scrambled off the snow, slipping once and trying again, this time getting to his feet. "RETREEEEAAAT!"

Ahsoka was still trying to play HeadNovel. "The phone won't work with these mittens," she said sadly.

"C'mon, guys versus girls!" Cherry said, making another snowball. "Come on, Ahsoka!"

"What?! I don't want to hit you, Cherry!" Tommy cried.

"It's just snow, Tommy."

"But it hurts," he mumbled.

"C'mon, don't be such a wimp," Ahsoka said to him, slipping her phone into her coat pocket.

"But I am a wimp…!"

"Snowball fight!" Cherry declared.

"YES! YOU'RE ON, SISTER!" Anakin cried. He put Rupert on his head.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes at him.

"Prepare to be smacked into tomorrow!" Cherry shouted, throwing the snowball at him.

Anakin stood there like an open target so he would get hit. "WOOHOO!" He threw some snowballs back.

Tommy was flicking snow gently, trying not to hurt anyone.

At that moment, Ian walked by with Lux. "Hey girls, we-" A snowball rocketed towards him, smacking him in the face and making him fall over backwards.

Cherry realized she hit him. "Yeah! Bonus point!"

Ahsoka burst out laughing. "Great shot!"

Anakin threw a snowball at Ahsoka's face.

She jumped out of the way. "Hey, hey, watch the face."

"We happen to like our faces, don't we?" Lux quipped, grinning.

"Didn't say I liked yours," Ahsoka shot back, throwing a snowball at him. Cherry threw one at him at the same time.

Lux then got hit in the face too.

Tommy waddled over to Ian and Lux. "Hide me, ok?"

"Go hide in the doorway," said Cherry, "Anakin wouldn't throw snow inside."

"Who says I wouldn't!" Anakin exclaimed.

Ahsoka dashed over to him and shoved snow down his coat from the back of his neck.

Anakin screamed at the top of his lungs like a little girl.

Ahsoka and Cherry both doubled over laughing.

"COLD! ! ! ! ! COLD! ! ! ! ! ! SO COLD! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !" Anakin ran around in circles. Rupert fell off his head and flopped into the snow on his little back.

Tommy was still trying to hide behind Ian and Lux. Ian sat up, wiping snow from his face. Tommy crawled over to him. "Please shield me."

"Why."

"So I don't get hit," Tommy replied worriedly.

"What does Cherry see in you, anyway?" Ian asked with a 'tsk'. "Be a man for once, take some snow to the face." He stood up and got hit in the face again.

"I am a man," said Tommy. "I am also a wimp. A happy wimp." He smiled happily.

"You can't be both," said Ian.

Tommy was silent for a moment. "Uhh… yeah but… I'm pretty sure I'm not a girl," he said awkwardly.

"No, I mean you can't be a _man_ and a _wimp_." He got hit in the back of the head with another snowball. "Would you cut it out already?!"

"Take it like a man!" Cherry shouted.

Tommy still didn't understand what Ian was trying to say. "So… all girls are wimps…? I don't think that's true."

"There's a difference between being a guy and being a man," Ian stated.

"Oh ok." Tommy was silent for a couple seconds longer. "…Will you still be my shield?"

"Course not." Ian got hit by _another_ snowball. "That's it!" He grabbed a snowball of his own.

Tommy cowered into a ball.

Anakin was throwing snowballs everywhere.

This went on for quite a while, until everyone was pretty much exhausted, and freezing. Tommy just tried to avoid getting hit at all costs.

Cherry's arm was getting tired from throwing. "Can we call a truce?"

"Yes! I vote for truce!" Tommy shouted right away.

"Wars are supposed to go on for years, guyz!" Anakin said, sticking his tongue out a little.

"This isn't a war, it's a fight," Cherry corrected him.

"Ohhhh. Ok. Alright!" Anakin dropped the snow and skipped across the snow to pick up poor little Rupert.

"Can we keep throwing them at Lux and Ian?!" Ahsoka exclaimed with a mad grin.

"_No._" Ian said firmly.

"They're part of our team. If we end, we all end." Anakin put Rupert on his shoulder. "Let's all go inside for hot chocolate!" His face lit up with excitement. "Unicorn or regular milk!"

"If you dare put even a _drop_ of unicorn milk in mine…" Ahsoka said threateningly.

"I will not. I promise."

Tommy struggled to get off the ground where he had been curled up waiting. Eventually he got up and waddled back inside.

Ian started walking towards the door.

"Who said you could come in?" Cherry glared at him.

"Aw, come on, we're cold too."

"I said they could come!" Anakin said happily. "We all had a very fun time and now we will have a fun time as friends with hot chocolate!"

"See, Anakin called us _friends_," Lux said.

Cherry glared at them. "Anakin! Don't let them come in! It'll just be trouble!"

Ian looked offended. "We won't be trouble."

Cherry blinked innocently at Anakin. "Please, make them leave."

Anakin seemed to contemplate this for a moment. "Well, I will do it for you, my little Cherry fluffy puppy!" He put Rupert on Cherry's shoulder and walked up to Ian and Lux. "I am sorry, but I am very susceptible by Cherry's cuteness because she is my fluffy puppy and you are a buff guy and a skinny guy, so I have to make you guys leave." He smiled at them sweetly, not caring what they think.

Lux face palmed. "Aw c'mon, why do I have to be the skinny guy! I'm just as strong as he is!"

"Uh, no, you're not. Sorry, dude." Ian glared at Anakin. "But you already said we could come in."

"Well, I changeded my mind."

"…Changeded?"

"Yes. Changeded." Anakin smiled brighter. "Have a nice snowy day!" He went inside with Cherry and Ahsoka to meet Tommy, who was already inside. Cherry smirked over her shoulder at them as she walked inside, leaving them out in the cold.

Ian was not going to give up that easily. "C'mon, let's just break their door again-" he started charging towards the door.

"Wait, dude…" Lux stopped him. "I want to go inside as badly as you do, but if we break their door, they'll all freeze. It's not a warm day."

Ian didn't find that a very valid reason, but decided to just go along with it. "Fine, whatever.

And the two walked away.

Back inside, Anakin was making hot chocolate in the kitchen. It had been clearly established that no one except him wanted unicorn milk, so he was making most of it with regular milk.

"You know what else snow means?" Anakin said excitedly, stirring faster for a moment and nearly spilling all the hot chocolate on himself.

Cherry peeled Rupert off her shoulder with two fingers and tossed him to the floor where he landed with a "Splat!" because he was so wet. She brushed her shoulder off. "What else does snow mean?"

"IT MEANS IT'S TIME TO GET A TREE! ! ! !" Anakin shouted as loud as he could out of sheer elation.

"A tree…?" Cherry said in confusion. "What for?"

"CHRISTMAS! …duh." Anakin said, pouring hot chocolate into little mugs with snowflakes on them.

"What's Christmas?" Cherry asked.

Anakin's jaw went straight to the ground. He stared at her for ten seconds, looking about to faint, but instead, he punched a button on the wall. The lights went out, Kit's monkeys appeared out of nowhere with a plethora of instruments, Anakin shoved everything off the kitchen table and climbed up on it, and a spotlight shone on him. He was suddenly holding a microphone. "What's Christmas, you ask? What's Christmas? Well, let me tell you!"

The monkeys began to play the trumpets and drums and everything else they had.

"It's… the… most wonderful tiiiiime, of the year," Anakin sung, closing his eyes as he felt the music. "With kids jingle belling and everyone telling you 'be of good cheer!' It's the most wonderful tiiiime, of the year…"

He proceeded to sing the entire song. He didn't have a very good voice, but the music and how much effort he put into it made it acceptable.

Tommy hid, scared by everything, until it was over.

"It's the most wonderful time, it's the most wonderful tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime , of the YEAAAAAARRRRRRRR!" Anakin dropped to his knees on the table as the monkeys crescendo-ed into the big finish. Then, it ended. The monkeys scampered away, the lights went back on, and the sparkly lights drew up into the ceiling. Anakin tossed away the microphone and slid off the table.

Cherry stared blankly.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes. "Christmas is a fun holiday where people give presents to each other and usually decorate."

"Ohhhh," said Cherry, understanding much more clearly than during Anakin's song.

"Obi-Wan's totally obsessed with it," Ahsoka added with a laugh.

"It sounds like fun," said Tommy.

"So, you get a tree?" Cherry asked.

Ahsoka nodded. "A pine tree. And we decorate it with lights and ornaments and stuff."

Anakin had other concerns at the moment, though. "Cherry! Y u no know Christmas?!"

"I've been a wolf most of my life," Cherry explained.

"And I was a squid," said Tommy.

"You've never even seen people decorate?" Anakin asked sadly.

Cherry and Tommy both shook their heads.

"This is depressing!" Anakin cried. "I will personally make sure that you two have the bestest Christmas ever!"

…

Obi-Wan's place had been decorated for many days already. In his mind, the time to decorate for Christmas was the day that candy canes showed up in the store. That marked the beginning of the Christmas season to him! Today, he was making a white chocolate peppermint coated popcorn garland to wrap a big chocolate pretzel with. Then, he would eat it.

"Mmmm mmmmm!" Obi-Wan said as he licked the peppermint flavored white chocolate off his spoon. "It tastes like creamy liquid candy canes!"

Satine was writing Christmas cards to her friends and family. "That's nice, dear."

Ki-Adi was also there, filming Obi-Wan. He paused for a moment, staring at the camera. "Which episode are we on?"

"Candy Cane Season Part 26," Obi-Wan said, dunking his strand of popcorn into the bowl of white chocolate.

"Oh ok thanks!"

"No prob." He wrapped the strand around his giant pretzel, then started shoving it into his mouth.

"Aren't you going to wait until it dries?" Satine asked, barely being able to watch her husband force the large object into his mouth.

"Nh-uh," Obi-Wan mumbled, his mouth filled with the sugary treat.

Satine just rolled her eyes.

Obi-Wan propped the rest of his giant pretzel under his arm to bring along with him. "Cmm, Kha-di," he said to Ki-Adi, still chewing. "Wr gunna gve kndy kans tu khds."

"Obi-Wan, stop talking with your mouth full," said Satine sweetly, taking a sip of her peppermint hot chocolate.

Obi-Wan swallowed. "Sorry! C'mon, let's go give candy canes to kids!" he repeated.

"Ok!" Ki-Adi said excitedly, and ran out with Obi-Wan and a big old box of candy canes.

Satine sighed, but laughed a little, and continued about with her letters.

Obi-Wan and Ki-Adi ran about through the Jedi Temple, giving candy canes to all the younglings, and eventually left the Jedi Temple all together and gave candy canes not only to the kids but to the moms and the dads and the men in the potato farm and the random jawas.

"This is so much fun!" Ki-Adi shouted, throwing a candy cane at a little girl getting hot chocolate with her mom.

The girl smiled brightly at them and unwrapped the treat, licking it happily.

"Well, they don't call it Candy Cane season for nothing!" Obi-Wan said, jumping up into a tree to give a candy cane to a squirrel.

"I thought it was 'Christmas Season', or 'The Season of Giving,'" said Ki-Adi.

Obi-Wan contemplated this. "Nope. Candy Cane season." He jumped back down from the tree.

"Ok!" Ki-Adi said cheerily, and handed a candy cane to a small boy.

"I don't like candy canes! Gimme chocolate!" the boy cried.

"You don't like candy canes?!" Obi-Wan shrieked, then fainted.

The boy jumped back and hid, then came back. "No. I like chocolate!"

"Well, we don't have any chocolate, sorry little boy," said Ki-Adi.

The boy kicked him in the leg and ran away.

"Ow! Ow!" Ki-Adi wailed and hopped up and down.

Obi-Wan got off the ground. "Who doesn't like candy canes…?" he whispered hoarsely.

"That kid, I guess."

"Hm."

They continued on.

…

Flint had been let out of the hospital a while back, with a medication to administer every time he heard about peaches.

"PEACHES?!"

Shhhhh, you can't hear me, I'm the narrator!

"Oh. Sorry!"

_Poof_. Bluesaber3 appeared next to Flint. "There. NOW you can hear me."

"AAAAHHH!"

"Oh shush," Bluesaber3 said. "Go eat a pumpkin pie of something." _Poof_.

"….Ok…" Flint ran home in fear. He bumped into Kit on the way home. "Hi cousin!"

"Hi Flint! How are you feeling?" Kit asked as he helped all his monkeys into the luggage compartment of his tour bus.

"Better, thanks. …Except for the fact that a girl just appeared out of nowhere… but she's gone now." Flint smiled as if to show he was perfectly fine.

Kit stared at him. "Well, alright. Want to join me for a tour session?"

"Sure!"

Flint got onto the bus after Kit and sat in the front. After a few minutes, people started piling into the multiple tour busses. Kit adjusted his microphone and began to play some Christmas-y music in the background. "Hello and welcome to Kit's Tour Group! Merry Early Christmas! Today, we'll be traveling about and taking a look at many wonderful things! If you have any personal belongings that you don't want to lose, please hand them to the monkeys in the overhead luggage compartments. They will be sure to keep them safe for you during the trip. Don't worry, no animals are ever harmed on these tour trips."

After several chaotic minutes of people scrambling around to get in and put their luggage away, Kit started up the tour bus and began driving through the hallways.

"Our first attraction to your left is the Yodasaurus and Corndoggius Bernius. As you may have noticed, the Yodasaurus has recently changed forms from his former shriveled green form to a new shriveled old human man form. Why he hasn't changed back yet, we will never know."

The tourists looked out the windows to their lefts and saw Yoda, who had just been Christmas shopping with Bernie. Bernie was trying to drag a pile of bags behind him but it was just too heavy.

"Bernie! Double time, you must move! Too slowly are we walking!" Yoda scolded his corndog friend.

"I already got trampled at the market!" Bernie whined.

"Not my fault, that was," Yoda stated.

Bernie sighed sadly and grunted as he dragged along the bags.

The tour group continued on, and passed the Jedi Temple Community Lobby, a room recently remodeled for Jedi to hang out. There were tables and chairs, couches, a little food stand, a fountain, and right now, a giant Christmas tree.

"To your right is the Jedi Temple Community Lobby. We'll be passing it again near the end of the tour for you to all get some souvenirs and snacks."

Mace saw the tour group and waved frantically.

Kit waved back and continued driving.

Next, they passed by Anakin's shared quarters. Kit had informed Anakin the previous day that he would be passing by, and wanted Anakin to meet him when he came.

"To your right will be coming the Dorkius Anakinious. He will be coming aboard to say hi to you all."

Anakin skipped outside with Rupert dangling from one of his hands. Rupert was still wet and muddy from being in the snow earlier that morning. He scrambled up into the tour bus. "Hi peoples! I am Anakin and I like unicorns and unicorn jelly and unicorn meat and my unicorn dolly Rupert-this is him right here- and sandwiches and tater tots! I love my family and friends and Christmas and cookies… and cookie sandwiches! And UNICORN COOKIE SANDWICHES!"

Kit smiled. "Any questions for the Dorkius Anakinious?"

One person buzzed the question button and said, "Why do you like unicorns?"

Anakin squeezed Rupert in a big hug, so much that all his wetness was squeezed out in a puddle of muddy water on the ground. "I luffs dem becuz theyar cute. Cute, and tasty!"

Everyone was silent for a few minutes while Anakin just smiled happily.

Another question buzzed in. "If you like unicorns so much, why do you eat them?"

"Well, I once knew a guy who knew a guy whose cousin knew a girl whose mother's uncle used to have a pet duck, and he loved it very, very much, but one day, he ate some duck meat, and it was good, but he still kept loving his duck! That story doesn't have a happy ending though because then the man ate his pet duck, and that was not nice. He was a very mean man though, maybe he was related to Count Dooku, or Mace Windu. Either way, though, I can love unicorns and eat them too. Besides, Rupert is made of soft felt and yarn, so I would never eat him. But did you know that some stuffed animals are filled with beans? I sure hope that no one eats them! That would be so terrorist-like to boil your little teddy and eat it! Oh, the horror!" Anakin put his hand to his forehead as if about to faint. He cleared his throat. "Well, anywhos, I've gotta take my Padawan and my pets to go get a Christmas tree!" He looked at Rupert. "Say 'byebye', Rupert!" He made the little unicorn doll wave, then made him say, "Byebye Rupert!" Then, Anakin hopped off the bus and back inside.

Kit watched him leave in silence. "Well. On with the tour!"

Anakin went back inside. "Well, now that I am done with that, let's go get our tree!"

Within the next few minutes, he, Ahsoka, Cherry, and Tommy were strolling through the snow on the way to the Christmas tree lot that was close enough to walk to.

"So, where in the yard do we put the tree?" Cherry asked.

Anakin burst out laughing. "It doesn't go in the yard, silly Cherry!"

"Where does it go then…?"

"In the living room!"

Cherry was confused. "It goes in the house? ?"

"Uh, yeaaaaah," Anakin said, in the tone of voice that suggested "duh."

"Give them a break, Anakin, they don't know," Ahsoka said, still playing HeadNovel on her phone.

"But how…? Is it in a pot or something?" Cherry asked.

Anakin thought for a moment. "I don't really know. Do you know, Rupert? No? Hm. Well, Ahsoka takes care of our trees, so…"

"It's in a little water thing to keep it fresh. It's already cut down so it doesn't need to be planted or anything like that," Ahsoka explained. "You'll understand more once you see it."

"Ok," said Cherry.

"What do you put on the tree?" Tommy asked.

"Lights, tinsel, little sparkly ornaments and stuff," Ahsoka listed off some things, "and candy canes."

Obi-Wan appeared out of nowhere with Ki-Adi. Well, not really, they were just nearby. "THE CANDY CANES ARE THE BEST PART! ! ! ! ! ! !"

"Kenob's! ! !" Anakin exclaimed, grinning elatedly and squeezing Rupert half to death in excitement.

"Hi Anakin!"

"We're going to get our tree!" Anakin said, flopping Rupert onto his shoulder. "You wanna come?"

"Oh yes! I've had my tree for almost a month now," Obi-Wan replied with a happy smile.

"Isn't it dried up and dead by now…?" Ahsoka asked.

"Nope, it's fake. And white and red!"

The Doctor also appeared out of nowhere. Yeah, ok not really, _he_ came from the TARDIS. "I love Christmas!"

"Mr. Doctor! We're going to get our tree!" Anakin said to him.

"How many times to I have to tell you, it's not Mr. Doctor."

"Sorry!"

"I can help you pick out the best tree possible, with my new screwdriver app," said the Doctor.

"Oh yay!"

"Let's go then. Come along, Pond!" The Doctor started marching.

"My name isn't 'Pond'," Anakin said with a frown.

"Oh right. Wrong person," the Doctor looked sad.

"Do you need a hug?"

"No, I'm fine. Come on, Christmas tree. Geronimo!"

Anakin clapped and Rupert fell off into the snow. He picked him up, brushed him off, and held him by his tail. "I love it when you say that! Say it again!"

"What, Geronimo?" asked the Doctor.

"Ooooh yes! Say it again!"

"Later. We need to get a tree."

Anakin pouted. "Ok." He kept walking.

Obi-Wan skipped along.

Ahsoka was oblivious to everything.

Tommy stuck close to Cherry because he was secretly afraid that they'd be attacked or robbed.

Ahsoka looked up every once in a while to see if they were there, and occasionally noticed Anakin fiddling with his unicorn doll. "Anakin, why do you suddenly have the interest to carry around that filthy thing everywhere you go?"

"He wasn't filthy when I got him!" Anakin exclaimed. "I got him for free at the Idiot's Convention, but because they ran out of hamburgers, they needed to order more unicorns, and they sent me this one in the mail because I helped them by eating the burnt crumbs out of their toaster oven."

Ahsoka made a face. "That is disgusting." She went back to being oblivious, since it seemed like a happier place.

"I just received the package with him in it last night."

"How do you know it isn't a girl unicorn, Anakin?" asked Obi-Wan curiously.

Anakin fell silent, as if he wasn't really able to figure out an answer to that question. "Well, I… I _want_ him to be a boy unicorn, so he is." He pursed his lips and continued walking.

Obi-Wan shrugged. Good enough answer for him.

The group eventually reached the tree lot, where hundreds of gorgeous pine and fir trees leaning up against boards. Happy families were browsing the aisles, purchasing trees, and loading them into their speeders.

Anakin ran down aisle after aisle of trees with glee, tossing Rupert in the air every once in a while (and only catching him half of the time). The Doctor began to scan trees to find the best one.

"Whoa," said Cherry as she looked at all the trees.

Tommy touched a tree and got poked by the needles. "Ow! It's poke-y!" He wailed.

Cherry grinned. "This feels like my old home!"

Tommy gasped horrifically. "You had poke-y trees in your old home?!"

"Yeah!"

"Did they hurt you? ?"

Cherry looked at him. "It's not like we hugged them or anything."

"Found one!" said the Doctor, off in the next aisle looking over a tree.

Anakin ran over as fast as he could. "Oh yay! ! !"

Obi-Wan was gazing around sadly. "These are all green. Where are the red and white ones like mine?"

"These ones are real," said the Doctor, putting away his screwdriver. "Now how about this one, eh? A beauty."

"It's PERFECT!" Anakin declared.

Ahsoka glanced up from her phone. "Huh? Oh yeah, great." She looked back to her phone again.

Cherry was smiling. "I like it."

Anakin wrapped his arms around the tree and started dragging it away.

"Cherry said not to hug them!" Tommy cried.

The Doctor picked up the stump to help Anakin.

"Why thank you!"

"I've never heard of a holiday where you bring a tree inside," said Cherry.

"You mean you've never heard of Christmas?!" the Doctor exclaimed in shock and mild horror.

Cherry shook her head. "Not until a little bit ago."

"Don't some people just have trees in their houses though?" Anakin asked.

"That's more along the lines of potted plants," the Doctor replied.

"Oh. Whatever!" Anakin said gleefully.

The Doctor looked at Cherry. "Ask me anything you'd like to know, I know all about Christmas."

So the whole way home, through buying the tree and dragging it back, Cherry asked the Doctor a whole bunch of questions. That took up the very long, boring trip home because it was taking forever to drag the tree across the sidewalk.

Eventually, however, they made it home and got the tree inside.

Anakin flung Rupert aside, rubbing his hands together in excitement. "Let the decorating begin! ! !"

**Wrote this aaaaall today. Well, aside from some stuff based off IM chat with Liv, that helped a lot. But anyways, stay tuned and review review review! :D**


	14. A Mix of Times

**Hello readers! I'm so sorry that it's been forever since I've updated. I was super busy over Christmas and New Year's, and then January was just hectic because Liv moved away last Friday so I had been trying to spend as much time with her as I could, and then I've just been super lonely and sad because of her leaving, so it's been hard to get into a cheery mood. :P But I managed to get enough to post.**

**We have one question**

**Talon Wolf Jedi asked: "isnt christmas in the starwars universe called life day?" answer: Umm... if it is, I'm not aware of it. I like to just take "normal" things and throw them into a "not-so-normal" Star Wars universe ;)**

**One thing before you read- If you haven't seen the Clone Wars episode "Lawless", this chapter has a couple spoilers. For those of you who have seen it, don't worry, things are resolved :)**

**Read on!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 14: A Mix of Times**

Anakin sniffed as he stared down at his thirty-seventh plate of roast unicorn and broccoli tater tots. He couldn't believe it. The Christmas tree was coming down today. It seemed like only just yesterday they had put it up! But, in actuality, it had been quite a few weeks since it went up, and a couple weeks since Christmas.

"Why can't Christmas last all year long?" Anakin sobbed.

"Because it doesn't…?" Ahsoka mumbled, completely engrossed in HeadNovel and munching on coffee flavored pickle chips.

"But it was a great Christmas," said Tommy.

"I thought so too!" Cherry agreed. "I'll never forget it."

"Great, because I probably will!" Anakin remarked. "Please remind me of it at a later date."

"How about now?" Bluesaber3 appeared out of nowhere once again.

"Ahhhh!" Anakin screamed, flailing his arms and getting roast unicorn all over the room. Everyone stared blankly (or glared) at him until he regained his composure. "That's a fantabulous idea! Don't you agree, Rupert?" Rupert sagged on Anakin's shoulder, and he interpreted that as agreement.

"Great!" Bluesaber3 clicked a button on a magical remote, and all became blackness.

_**1 Month Earlier…**_

"_Ask me anything you'd like to know, I know all about Christmas."_

_So the whole way home, through buying the tree and dragging it back, Cherry asked the Doctor a whole bunch of questions. That took up the very long, boring trip home because it was taking forever to drag the tree across the sidewalk._

_Eventually, however, they made it home and got the tree inside._

_Anakin flung Rupert aside, rubbing his hands together in excitement. "Let the decorating begin! ! !"_

After about an hour, or more like two after the drama of getting the tree inside subsided, the tree was covered in sparkling ornaments, happy plastic gingerbread, lights, tinsel, candy canes, bottles of ketchup (as well as small packets of it from Plo's restaurant), reindeer, more candy canes, fake poison ivy, even more candy canes, and a few large rocks from last year.

"Tada!" Anakin declared.

"That's… not exactly how I imagined it," Cherry commented. "But it's interesting?"

"Needs pickles," Ahsoka said, and proceeded to hang a few pickles on empty branches.

Tommy had not been participating too much because he had been at the kitchen table the whole time. Anakin assumed he was eating the decorations. Finally, though, he came into the living room with a little cardboard circle attached to a ring of ribbon. Glued to the cardboard was a picture he had drawn of himself and Cherry. "Here," he said quietly to her, holding up the homemade ornament.

Cherry took it gently, looked at it, and smiled. "It's perfect." She hung it on the tree.

"Awww!" Anakin squealed, tossing Rupert across the room. "That was the sweetest thing ever and much better than eating decorations like I thought you were doing!"

Ahsoka rolled her eyes.

Tommy was blushing as Cherry smiled at him.

"AAAHHH YOU'RE TURNING INTO DARTH MAUL!" Anakin shrieked.

"I am?!" Tommy choked hoarsely and paled white as a sheet in fear.

"Oh not anymore. NOW YOU'RE A GHOST!"

Tommy screamed quietly, now extremely afraid.

"Calm down, Tommy, you're not a ghost- or Darth Maul," Cherry assured him.

He breathed a sigh of relief.

Anakin retrieved Rupert from behind the couch where he had landed after the toss and plopped him on his head. "Do you remember when you were still a squid, Tommy?" He slid Rupert down into his arms and squeezed him rather violently. "I remember it like it was yesterday!" "I don't really remember much," Tommy replied, his tone timid and quiet as usual. "Why do you ask? Is it important?"

"Oh no it's not important. I just like to ask random questions." Anakin stared at Rupert. "Hey does anyone know why they call the little noodles 'macaroni'? Why not call it something like 'curly little noodles'?"

"Because that's stupid?" Ahsoka offered, messaging a fake friend on HeadNovel.

"Heyyyy I thought you were helping us decorate." Anakin frowned slightly and went over to Ahsoka, peering over her shoulder and breathing on her.

She glared at him a bit and moved away. "I am helping. Aren't we done?"

"Oh. I guess so."

"What's next?" Cherry asked.

"We plan for Christmas day!"

_About a week or two later…_

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Anakin screamed at the top of his lungs as he woke everyone up at 6:03 a.m. exactly.

"Yipes! ! ! !" Tommy shrieked quietly, terrified.

"IT'S CHRSITMAS GET UP SO WE CAN OPEN PRESENTS AND THEN EAT ROAST UNICORN AND BROCCOLI TATER TOTS!"

"Don't you know that no one's gonna eat that with you? You'll have leftovers for weeks," Ahsoka mumbled with a yawn as she shuffled into the living room.

Cherry came into the living room as well, eyes lit up with excitement. She grabbed Tommy's hand as soon as he entered the room and pulled him over to the middle of the room. "Can you believe it, Tommy?! Our first Christmas is finally here!"

Tommy beamed with a bright smile. "I know, it's exciting!"

"LET'S OPEN PRESENTS." Anakin threw Rupert in the air and scrambled over to the tree to pick up a present (or three).

"Hang on, didn't Obi-Wan say he was coming over with Satine to open presents with us? He's bringing breakfast," Ahsoka reminded him. "And I thought Padme was coming too?"

"Ooohh yeah. Right. I love breakfast. And Padme. Er… maybe not in that order." Anakin grabbed Rupert again and sat rather impatiently.

Obi-Wan arrived with Satine within the next five minutes, and Padme was right behind them.

"Merry Christmas, Anakin!" Obi-Wan exclaimed, setting a big bag of presents in front of the tree.

"Merry Christmas, Kenob's!" Anakin replied, grinning widely and rocking back and forth in excitement.

"Merry Christmas!" said Satine.

Padme came over to Anakin. "Merry Christmas, Ani." She gave him a kiss.

Anakin grinned even bigger, kissed her in return, and kept on smiling.

Soon, the group were gathered 'round the tree, opening presents, eating Obi-Wan's special Christmas chocolate-coffee cake, and drinking coffee, hot chocolate, and hot apple cider.

Everyone got rocks, books, paint, sunglasses, food, music, or bouncy balls, among other random items. It was a great morning.

Later in the evening, the group as well as more friends gathered around a giant table for Christmas dinner.

"I told you, Skyguy, no one's gonna eat that," Ahsoka reminded him as he set it out.

Anakin just shrugged.

Luckily, everyone else had brought food as well, given the fact that it was more of a huge potluck.

At the end of the night, everyone was stuffed, and Anakin did indeed have leftovers for weeks.

_**Remote clicks again, signaling the end of the memory tape.**_

"There, that's the end," said Bluesaber3.

Anakin looked a bit disappointed. "Awww you left out the part where-"

"No one wants to hear that part…!" Ahsoka cried.

"Why…"

"Because! It's stupid!"

Anakin sighed and pouted.

"Just eat your unicorn."

Anakin sighed again and stuck his fork into his leftover meat.

"Well guys, I'm off!" said Bluesaber3. "I'm way behind, so I've got some time jumping to do."

"Time jumping?!" Anakin lit up. "Can I come?!"

"I'm afraid not," Bluesaber3 replied.

"Why?"

"Wibbly wobbly… timey wimey… stuff."

And with an explosion of rainbows and sparkles, she disappeared.

_**Several weeks later, sometime in early February…**_

Here we go. This is where I really wanted to get to, but I couldn't just leave you guys in the dark about Christmas! Yeah, yeah, I know, don't worry, I'll let the Doctor know I borrowed his TARDIS. He won't mind.

Anywhos, let's get to it.

_This is the news! Witnesses have claimed to have seen the death of former Duchess Satine Kryze-Kenobi on Mandalore. Our research has stated that not only was her husband, Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi, witness to the murder- but the murderer himself was Darth Maul. We're here with the witnesses right now to see if we can figure out anything else._

"_I tell you! It was just like 'YOU'LL KNOW MY PAIN!' and then WHAM. He drives a kooky reversed lightsaber spear through her!" says Jim, our first witness._

"_I think it's just all some kind of crazy publicity stunt," states another witness, Joe. "This supposed 'Darth Maul' character? He runs around in the mall trying to become a girl scout. Now that I think of it, I guess a guy crazy enough to do that may have the motivations to murder, but it just seems real far-fetched."_

_What really happened that day on Mandalore? Publicity stunt? Treason? Or do we have a real assassination on our hands? As of right now, we don't know for sure…_

"Hah! Wow, people will believe anything they see or hear these days," Obi-Wan said with a laugh as he watched the news with his lovely wife Satine on Saturday morning.

"Indeed they do," Satine agreed, laughing as well.

Suddenly, Anakin burst into their quarters, sweating and panting. "OBI-WAN! I JUST HEARD THE NEWS I'M SO SORRY ABOUT- … Satine…?"

"…Yep, anything…" Obi-Wan murmured. "I'm sorry the news has fooled you, Anakin. Satine's quite alright."

"But the news! What happened?!" Anakin exclaimed.

"Satine and I were on the set of _Star Wars: The Clone Wars_, filming a scene for their show. It was all acting," Obi-Wan explained to his friend.

"Very marvelous acting on your part, if I may add, Obi," Satine remarked.

"Not as spectacular as your performance, my dear," Obi-Wan countered playfully, smiling.

Anakin was completely confused. "So does that mean Hot Cakes isn't really dead either?!"

"I would suppose not," Obi-Wan said with a shrug.

Anakin's eyes widened to about eight times their normal size. "Ohh man… I better go dig up that coffin…" He ran away, panicking.

Obi-Wan face palmed.

…

A knock on the door snapped Ahsoka out of her trance-like gaze on the tiny screen of her phone. She snapped her head up reflexively, causing sharp pain from quick movement after being in a less than comfortable position for over an hour. With a sharp breath and a quick rub to her neck with her text-cramped hand, she slapped the phone on the side table next to the couch and went to answer the door.

It was Bob.

She tried her hardest not to let out a frustrated sigh, but it came anyway. "Yes?" Her tone came off about three times more irritated than she had planned.

He recoiled a bit, confident eyes faltering once again. "I just wondered if you wanted to go on the final date-"

"Final? As in, last?" She felt a spark of relief and anticipated freedom, followed by a burn of quiet regret. _What's that doing there…_ "You're saying that after this date, it's over?" _And you'll leave me alone?_

"Yeah, I guess, technically…" Longing swelled in his deep green eyes for a moment. He cleared his throat. "I figured maybe it'd be better to do it before the rush of Valentine's Day starts up… so things won't be so busy…"

"Whatever works," she replied with a shrug. "Let's get it over- I mean…"

Bob looked down a bit, feeling as if drowned in rejection. "After this, I'll leave you alone if that's what you want."

Ahsoka felt her heart skip a beat, yet she wasn't sure why. She had waited for this day ever since that stupid game show ever happened- the day when she'd finally be free. The flutter had to be from the longing to be free, right? But back in the hidden depths of her mind, she thought that maybe, just maybe… her heart was telling her that this wasn't the time to let go.

_But who ever listens to those "back of the mind" feelings, right?!_

"Ahsoka?"

She snapped her head up again, cringing as her cramped neck screamed at her not to ever move like that again. "Huh?"

"I asked if you're ready to go," Bob repeated.

"Oh. Sorry. Yeah, let's go."

…

Anakin raced down to the graveyard and crashed through the gates, tripping over short stubby gravestones and crashing into larger ones. "HOT CAAAAKEEESSSS!" He skidded to a sharp halt at the grave of his clone friend, creating muddy streaks in the dew-coated grass. He frantically started digging with his bare hands, flinging clumps of grass and mud left and right.

"Hey!" He heard a loud voice shout at him. "What are you doing!?"

"I WILL SEE HOT CAKES AND YOU WILL NOT STOP ME!" Anakin screamed.

There was a pause.

"You could just use the door."

Anakin looked up, and there, standing before him, was Hot Cakes. "HOT CAKES!" He squealed. He jumped up and hugged Hot Cakes half to death. "I'm so sorry I thought you were dead!"

"Oh don't worry about it. I just dug out an underground condo and got the cats to bring me stuff. The graveyard workers brought me food, but they won't let me leave because they think I'm a ghost." He rolled his eyes dramatically.

"Well I will tell them you are not and I will take you home to the clone place and you will be with us forever and ever until you die of old age which will be sad but then again I'll die probably too so- OH MY GOSH I WILL DIE SOMEDAY, THAT IS SO TRAGIC. YIKES!" Anakin looked around, as if suddenly forgetting what he had been talking about. "Oh! This is Rupert, and he loves everyone. Say hi Rupert!"

Rupert slipped off Anakin's shoulder and fell in the mud.

"Hey! Now you need a bath!" Anakin grumbled, peeling him off the floor. "Let's go."

So Anakin started for the exit with Hot Cakes following.

A graveyard worker began to approach them.

"Quick! Hide!" Anakin exclaimed, and jumped into a tree.

Hot Cakes scrambled up after him.

"What are you doing up there?!" The worker barked at them.

"We are sightseeing!" Anakin replied.

"GET DOWN."

Anakin slid down the trunk and Hot Cakes followed.

"It's illegal to play with our ghosts," said the worker.

"Well, see, he's my ghost. I've come to take him home," Anakin explained.

The worker scratched his goatee. "Oh. Alright. Have fun! If you're interested, we sell a guide on how to care for your own ghost in our gift shop. Only twenty nine ninty-nine!"

"Oh my! That sounds fabulous!" Anakin said. "I'll buy one!"

Hot Cakes elbowed Anakin in the arm. "We don't need that."

"We need _anything_ that's suggested by a gift shop worker! They know what's up in life. Unlike you!" Anakin dragged Hot Cakes to the gift shop with him.

After browsing the shop for an entire hour, Anakin left with the ghost guide book, three t-shirts, a bobble head, and a picture frame.

By this time, Hot Cakes was _completely _bored out of his mind, and super happy to get out of there.

On the way to the clone place, they stopped at the sandwich shop for a snack, and spotted Rex walking along the sidewalk. He was carrying a bouquet of pink and red roses.

"REX! REX! REXREXREXREXREX!" Hot Cakes screamed and squealed, jumping up and down in excitement.

Rex dropped the flowers in shock, then quickly picked them up and brushed them off. "Hot Cakes?!"

"I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH!" Hot Cakes ran over to him and hugged him with all his might. "It's been so boring living in an underground condo with five cats and a mouse!"

Rex was too shocked to reply.

"See I didn't really die! I was just acting but Anakin didn't really know that so he sent me to the graveyard in a coffin and the people wouldn't let me leave because they thought I was a ghost! But I'm back! ! !"

"C'mon Hot Cakes! We need to go tell Obi-Wan that he's right about the acting stuff!" Anakin said.

"Oh ok! Bye Rex!" Hot Cakes skipped away with Anakin.

Poor Rex was left in shock, staring down at his now squished flowers. He sighed a little and walked back to get new flowers.

…

Bob and Ahsoka walked downtown and came to a little restaurant that Bob had specifically saved for the final date. "I thought you may like it," he said, taking off the blindfold he had told her to wear.

Ahsoka was shocked to find that it was the sandwich shop that Anakin came to almost every single day. "Here? Really?" She was confused. "What in the galaxy made you think I'd like this place?"

"Well, they've got great pickles, and specialty coffees-"

Ahsoka's eyes lit up. "Say no more." She started for the door.

Bob felt a glimmer of hope and darted ahead of her to hold the door open like a gentleman.

She nodded in appreciation and walked through the open door. He followed. She walked straight up to the counter and scanned the menu quickly, then promptly ordered a large latte and a pickle supreme sandwich. He ordered a fried chicken sandwich and a mocha. They got their number (which was 24) and sat down at a little table in one of the cozy corners of the shop.

"I never knew this place had the potential to be great," Ahsoka stated, watching the workers behind the counter prepare their food.

"You'd be amazed at the things you can miss if you're not paying attention," Bob remarked, watching as well.

"Are you implying that I don't pay attention?!" Ahsoka exclaimed.

"No, no! I was just saying!" Bob replied quickly, though he'd never admit that it was completely true the way that she kept her nose to her phone 24/7.

"I am a very observant person!" she stated rather defensively.

"I'm sorry- I didn't mean it like that," he said, trying his hardest to not make this final date crash and burn like some of the others. "You're an amazing person, Ahsoka. You're strong, confident, kind… beautiful…"

Ahsoka looked down a little and her voice calmed. "Flattery will get you nowhere."

"It's not flattery," he replied in complete honesty.

She looked up at him. "Then what is it. Because if I were you looking at me, I don't know that I'd really consider myself kind towards you. So why do you say it."

"Everyone's got their moments- their things that set them off. I just try not to judge a book by it's cover. I know that even if it's not extended to me, you're a very kind and compassionate person." He looked up as the waiter set their food in front of them, and thanked him.

Ahsoka nodded in thanks as well. She stared down at her food, then took a long sip of her coffee. "This is really great coffee."

"I thought you'd like it," Bob replied with a smile.

She smiled back. "Hey, look… I'm sorry about how I've treated you over these dates. It's been getting harder to stay sane and not get ticked off every day at home. Ever since Anakin 'adopted' Cherry and Tommy, things just seem crazy all the time. And he's gotten crazier. I miss when it was just him and I- Master and Padawan. But that's not an excuse for how I've acted towards you."

His smile brightened a little bit, though it was softened by sympathy and compassion. "I understand."

"You do?" She looked into his eyes, feeling his forgiveness.

"If I didn't truly love you, I don't think I'd still be here. I just couldn't give up."

Ahsoka felt her heart swell with feelings, feelings that in the past, she would never admit to herself to have. "Thanks."

He looked at her. "For what?"

"Not giving up."

The two exchanged another smile, and began to eat their sandwiches.

**Thank you for reading! Please review! I'm sorry for the rushed Christmas scenes, but once it's February, it's kind of hard to get into the Christmas spirit... especially when you want to move on to Valentine's-y things ;)**

**REVIEW. k thx. bye!**


	15. More Dates?

**Hello Readers! Despite my efforts this STILL took almost a month to get up. Most the time I'm so bored I forget that I _could_ be writing, or I'm actually busy. :P Anyway. Let's see if we have any questions. Ok we have one!**

**Pergjthshme asked: "Does this mean Echo's alive too?" Answer: Yep, guess that does mean that! :)**

**Also, because the Not-So-Normal Week series has always been a bit AU (altered universe), I'm not going to be following the events of the Clone Wars as they happened in the finale. :)**

**Ok, enjoy a little belated Valentine's Day writings!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 15: More Dates?**

Deer peeps,

Thus is Anakin. Haaiii! Wee all had wundor-fol Hearts Day, beecuz I cont spall Valuntins. Bot, I no how too spall Hearts beecuz Padmay showded me. I recordeded Tomee and Cheree on thear dat beecuz I mad them go erlee-er than Padmay and me so that thay wudnt go to bed lat. Hehe I show yoo videeow nao.

**February 14- around 4:52 p.m. Location: a small restaurant that specializes in excellent meat (pretty much any kind of meat that's edible) called Steaks and Things.**

"Thanks for taking me here, Tommy," said Cherry, looking up at Tommy with a smile. "I know you don't really eat meat."

Tommy blushed a little, and replied in a quiet, slightly stuttered voice, "You're welcome, I wanted to pick somewhere you'd really like… I'm sure they have something that hasn't been killed…"

Cherry slid her hand into Tommy's and squeezed it lightly. "And if they don't, we'll go to We Sell Sandwiches afterwards so you can eat."

"Okay. As long as we're back by seven like Anakin told us. I don't want to make him mad."

"It'll be fine. If he has to leave before we're back, then we'll get back and he won't be there. No big deal."

"Tommy, party of two," came a voice, and the two looked up at the waiter ready to seat them.

He led them to a wooden table near the back of the restaurant. The table was shaped and painted to look like a steak.

Tommy pulled out the chair for Cherry, let her sit down, and pushed it in gently. Then he sat down rather nervously in his own chair.

"Thanks, Tommy," Cherry said with a smile, picking up her menu and beginning to read it.

"You're welcome," Tommy replied shyly, staring down at the table in fear and mild disgust. He plucked his napkin up and rested it on his lap to get it off the table, then picked up the menu and looked to see if there was anything without meat. The menu featured pictures of almost each dish offered, showing vivid, detailed pictures of huge grilled steaks. There was beef, pork, bison, goat, lamb, alligator, monkey, bear, chicken, turtle, horse, sea lion, giraffe, nuna, nexu, unicorn, guinea pig, giant snail, octopus, swordfish, squid-

"This isn't a menu! It's a list of murder!" Tommy sobbed, flipping over the menu and hiding his eyes with his napkin. He thought he might throw up.

Cherry reached across the table and took his hand. "Tommy, it's ok," she said soothingly. "We can leave if you'd like…"

Tommy took a deep breath to try and keep himself from hyperventilating. "N-no, it's ok, Cherry… I'll just ask the waiter instead of looking at the menu…"

"Alright," Cherry replied. "If you change your mind, though, we can leave."

"Thanks. I'm ok."

The waiter came back in a couple minutes. "May I take yer order?"

"E-Excuse me, sir, do you have anything that hasn't been killed?" Tommy asked him timidly.

"….You mean frozen? We use all fresh ingredients, never frozen, better quality y'know," replied the waiter. "Everything on the menu's as fresh as it can be. Just got in a fresh shipment of bear a few minutes ago actually if you're interested."

Tommy gulped. "I- I meant do you- do you have anything that hasn't been brutally murdered for the sake of cooking… like maybe salad?"

"Why sure we got chicken salad, octopus salad, alligator salad; pretty much anything can be made into salad with a bit 'a dressing," said the waiter.

"Oh, um… but I meant… could I just have some celery or lettuce or something? If it wouldn't be any trouble…" Tommy said quietly but politely.

"What was that? Sorry, I can't hear you real well."

Tommy didn't want to bother him anymore. "Never mind… I'll just have some water…"

"Eh? Please speak up."

Cherry set down her menu. "He's asking if you have anything without meat. He's vegetarian."

The waiter gasped dramatically. "Vegetarian?!"

"If you could just get him a plate of lettuce or something, we'd be very appreciative," said Cherry.

"VEGETARIAN?!"

Tommy shrunk back in his chair. "I can just have the water, it's ok-"

"VEGETARIAN?! !? !? ? ?"

"I'm sorry I asked-"

The waiter slapped his own leg and cried out in laughter and excitement. "My mother was a vegetarian! She was the greatest- craziest, mind you, but greatest- woman I ever knew! Crazy leaf-eaters, y'all are. But y'know, I don't judge. Er, maybe I just did; but um- yeah. I'll call up a plate 'o leaves for ya."

Tommy was pressed into the back of his chair in complete and utter shock, too stunned to move or speak, terrified out of his mind.

"Thank you so much," said Cherry, a bit creeped out as well. "I'll have bison steak- rare."

"Now that's something I can compute. It'll be right on out!" The waiter scribbled "rare bison" and "leaves" on his notepad and wandered into the back where the kitchen was.

Cherry looked at Tommy as he left. "Are you ok?"

Tommy nodded rapidly, though still looked petrified.

"If whatever he brings you is enough to eat, instead of the sandwich shop, we can go get some ice cream afterwards, ok? That'll be nice and calming." She smiled softly.

Tommy relaxed a little. "Okay."

In a few minutes, the waiter came back with their food. He set down Cherry's plate- a huge plate with a steak the size of a computer monitor slapped right in the middle. Then he set down Tommy's plate. "This is all we could find, hope it suits yer tastes."

Tommy looked down to find a couple blades of grass, a palm frond, and a pile of what appeared to be leaves but actually was baby spinach. "Thank you, sir," he said softly.

"Eh? Couldn't hear ya. Sorry. Enjoy!" The waiter wandered off again.

"…Is that a palm frond?" Cherry asked.

"Yeah. But I can eat the spinach," Tommy replied. He smiled softly and took a bite out of a spinach leaf.

Cherry smiled back and cut a nice big, juicy bite of her steak with the giant steak knife they gave her. She put it in her mouth. "Mmm…"

Tommy bit his lip a little, but decided he could stare at his leaves and not worry about the probably-4-pound steak across the table from him.

After a little while, but not too long, they were both done eating.

"That was amazing," Cherry said with a happy sigh. She licked her lips to get every last bit of salty juice that she could.

"How did you eat all of that?" Tommy asked in amazement, staring at the plate on which only a dribble of steak juice and a stick of parsley remained.

Cherry licked her teeth and grinned. "What can I say? I'm still a wolf at heart."

"Wow…" Tommy could barely believe it.

The waiter came back and set the bill on the table. "Oh and something everyone gets when they come on down to Steaks 'n Things." He grinned.

Tommy was terrified that it was going to be something like a container of sheep blood or maybe a unicorn eyeball.

"Mints!" The waiter put a couple little mint candies on the table, wrapped in pretty pink foil for the holiday. He walked away.

Tommy breathed a sigh of relief. He put money in the bill.

"Thanks again, Tommy. It was really kind of you to take me here," Cherry said. She wanted to make sure he had her utmost appreciation after how hard it was for him to actually come here.

"You're welcome, Cherry. Happy Valentine's Day." He smiled.

"Happy Valentine's Day," Cherry replied, and leaned on the table a little, closer to him.

He did the same, and soon they were mere centimeters away from each other.

Cherry closed her eyes, and leaned a little bit more.

So did Tommy.

And then…

"OH. MY. GOSHNESS. ARE YOU TWO GONNA KISS?!" Anakin appeared from behind a fake plant where he had been taping them.

Cherry nearly fell out of her chair. "ANAKIN! ! ! ! Why can't you leave us alone for once?!"

"Because it's your firstest Valentine's Day together and I wanted to tape it!" Anakin held up his camcorder, taping the tacky ceiling fans by accident for a moment.

"Admit it! You were spying on us! That's why you wanted us to go before you and Padme go tonight! So you could _spy on us_!" Cherry marched over to him.

"Nu-uh. I was documentarying," Anakin insisted.

Cherry face palmed. "Well, the 'documentary' is over. Tommy and I are going to go get some ice cream. We'll be home afterwards."

"But- I was gonna document that too!"

"Go document your date with Padme," said Cherry.

Anakin thought for a moment, weighing his options. "Well, ok."

And he left, ending the video as he walked out the door.

**End of video**

Wuznt that just sooo kyoot? Wall, Im of. I gotta find bubbles four Roopurt.

_Anakin leaves computer_

Well. That certainly was interesting. Ahem.

Although Anakin didn't actually take anymore video that day, (once he left for his special night with Padme, he got lost in her beautiful eyes and abandoned the video taking; though they did get a nice waiter to take a picture of them before they left the restaurant.) we do have some more records of other couples that did something special. But parts of those stories actually take place several days before the fourteenth. One begins in the mall elevator…

_A week before Valentine's Day_

Lux sat in a chair at a desk in the elevator. He had set it up a couple hours ago, and called Ian to meet him there. He asked everyone who came in if they had an appointment. Some of the people really thought he was serious and actually left the elevator and took the stairs. Others didn't pay attention to his stupidity and rode the elevator anyway.

Ian pressed the elevator button and waited. When the doors opened, he went inside, finding Lux sitting there.

Lux watched him walk in. "Welcome to my office."

"Uhh…. Lux?" Ian asked.

"Yes?" A random person walked into the elevator. "Do you have an appointment?"

"Uhhhh… no…" the person replied. He was pretty sure this had been an elevator.

"Then wait outside. I'm in the middle of something," said Lux.

The person made no other comment, looking very confused, and stepped back out.

"This is an elevator…" said Ian.

"Your point is?" Lux asked.

"Well… won't it be distracting with it moving up and down?"

Lux shrugged. "It keeps me motivated." The elevator jolted upwards.

"Ok… so… why did you want me to come here."

"It is time for us to get serious about getting the girls. Since our other plans most obviously failed," said Lux. He motioned to a chair on the other side of the desk. "Please, have a seat." He waited for Ian to sit down, then continued, "I took the liberty of realizing that I know nothing about you, and not having our minds completely connected on the 'same' level will hinder us. I also took the liberty of taking an online class on mental and emotional therapy. So please, tell me your life story."

"Uhh… well…."

A random person came into the elevator.

Lux pulled out a notebook and put on dorky-looking reading glasses. He stared at the person. "Do you mind?"

"What?"

"Do you have an appointment?"

"This is an elevator."

"Call it what you want. Please wait outside and I will be happy to see you afterwards."

The person just blinked with a straight face and pressed the button for one of the floors. The door closed.

"Do I still have to tell my life story while she's here?" Ian asked.

"Yes," said Lux. "It's not like you have an emotionally scarring or utterly embarrassing childhood." He got up on his chair on his knees and pressed his hands against the desk, leaning towards Ian. "Or _do_ you?"

"Uh… well I…."

Lux kept staring at him, and adjusted his glasses.

"Do you have to be looking at me like that?"

Lux stopped leaning on the desk and tried to slip back onto the chair normally, but instead fell backwards in the chair. He got up and fixed it quickly, trying to make it look like nothing happened. He looked at the lady that was with them in the elevator. "Say, if our dates end up not working out, you wanna date one of us?" He adjusted his glasses.

"Over my dead body!" the woman exclaimed, and got out as the elevator stopped and the doors opened.

"_Finally_," Lux exclaimed, sitting back in his chair. "Please, carry on."

"Well… Why do I have to do this again?" Ian asked.

Lux started counting off things on his fingers. "One, I need to know everything about your past so that we will be able to more easily figure out how to get the girls to like us. And two, we're totally BFFs now, aren't we? Coworkers, scheming together; that's what best friends do, right?" He grinned excitedly.

"I don't like to talk about my past man…"

"It's not like anyone else is gonna hear."

Maul suddenly ran into the elevator and pressed the buttons repeatedly.

Ian stared awkwardly.

"I mean look at that guy, he isn't even listening!" Lux said.

"GET OUT OF MY WAY, LOSERS." Maul shoved past the desk and hid behind it.

Security guards crashed up against the closed elevator doors.

"What the…" Ian looked at them.

Lux cleared his throat. "Please, continue."

Ian sighed. "There's not a lot to tell."

Maul overturned the desk as soon as the elevator reached the next floor and darted out of the elevator as soon as the doors were open enough for him to fit through.

Lux ignored the fact that Maul had even been there at all. "I don't care if it's a novel or a one page poem, just tell me!"

"My parents were never home, alright?! There!" Ian crossed his arms over his chest and stared at the ground.

"See, that wasn't so hard; this therapy stuff is easy, man, you just gotta go with it," Lux said as he wrote down notes.

Ian rolled his eyes.

"Now that everyone is completely informed, we will get to business," said Lux, setting down his notepad.

"Whoa whoa whoa, hold the phone, you didn't tell me about _your _past," said Ian.

Lux looked at him. "I'm a Separatist kid, what do you _expect_ about my past?" Lux asked him.

Ian shrugged. "Tell it anyway."

Lux looked with a sense of 'oh fine.' "I grew up semi-normally, when the war started, my father was killed, and then my mother was killed by Dooku himself after helping out a Republic senator. 'Not a lot to tell.'"

"Sounds rough," Ian said.

"But why are we sitting around talking about this, we're here to get the girls to like us," Lux said, grabbing his notepad again.

"But you said…."

"Discussion time over! Commence… discussion time." He tore off the other note page and crumpled it, throwing it at the elevator wall. He clicked his mechanical pencil and began a new page.

Ian just looked at him with no comment.

"C'mon, discuss. Getting the girls to like us. There's got to be a way, given that we both already agreed that we're better than their other options."

"I guess the trick is proving it to them," Ian stated.

"Precisely," said Lux, though he hadn't actually thought of it himself. "Most guys would go with _flowers_, or chocolates," he continued, in a tone of disgust that made flowers and chocolates sound like awful things, "but I know better. That's why I've invented…" he began scribbling on his note paper, "the get-a-girl-to-like-you device!"

"The who-with-the-what now?" Ian blinked in confusion, trying to see what Lux had scribbled.

Lux held up the paper to show Ian his drawing. "The get-a-girl-to-like-you device. It contains stuff that girls like. Like bunnies… tea parties… unicorns… pink… frilly dresses…"

Ian's eye twitched. "What kind of girls have you dated before."

"None." Lux tweaked the drawing with his pencil.

"Yeah, well, you're thinking of them in like, toddler stage." Ian took the pad and pencil. "When they grow up, they like romantic things." He started writing things down. "And you know, your chances go way up if you can play the guitar. Girls always love guys who can play guitar and write sad songs."

"Does it have to be guitar, or can it be some other instrument?" Lux asked.

"Well, guitars are best. I don't know why. Oh, and whatever you do with or for them, you do it at night." Ian continued writing ideas.

Lux frowned slightly. "At night? Why'd you wanna do that, you can't see anything!"

"I dunno, but it adds romantic-ness or something," he said as he wrote. "Compliments are good too."

"Compliments are lame. I prefer over-exaggerated flattery."

"Same thing, right?"

"Really? SWEET."

Ian looked up from writing. "And then taking your shirt off helps."

"I'm an expert at that! You should see my HeadNovel profile picture!" Lux said proudly.

"Oh? Let's see."

Lux took out his phone and showed him.

Ian looked at it. "I think you need to work on your six-pack."

Lux shrugged.

"Yeah, you want results like this," Ian said, and took off his shirt.

"Ooooh."

Suddenly a girl came into the elevator and her eyes widened in shock.

"See watch, you got a guitar by any chance?" Ian asked.

"Umm… wait, wait," Lux dug in his desk drawers. "Does a ukulele work?"

"No it has to be a guitar."

Lux dug in the bottom drawer. "AHA." He handed Ian the guitar he found.

Ian took it and looked at the girl. "You know, I have this song I wrote, and I can't decide if it could be a hit single or not. You wanna listen?"

The girl didn't reply, motionless in shock.

Ian started singing. He had a relatively decent voice, but not great enough to win any singing competitions or anything like that.

The girl was still completely freaked out by seeing a shirt-less guy in the elevator, and she ran out of the elevator as soon as she was on the floor she wanted to be at.

Lux clapped. "I think if your girl never falls for you, you'll be the most hit single out there!"

…

_The day before Valentine's Day_

Ahsoka scrolled through her page on HeadNovel, while also half-watching Anakin as he made heart-shaped cookies. Of course, the cookie dough was store bought and the hearts were abnormally shaped. His argument was that they looked more "realistic."

Her phone vibrated and made a beeping sound, telling her that she had a text. She opened it and found it to be from Bob.

_From: Bob_

_2 seconds ago_

"_Want more dates?"_

She smiled to herself a little. And with an idea in mind, she grabbed her purse. "Anakin, I'll be back later, ok?"

"Ok! Where ya going, Snips?" he asked, sprinkling colored sugars on his cookies.

"The grocery store. Then I may stop by to see a friend." She grinned a little.

"Just be back before dark! I'm making frozen pizzas for dinner!"

Ahsoka laughed. "I will."

She walked out the door and went the short way to the little grocery store nearby. It wasn't like the giant supermarket that they normally went to, but it had exactly what she needed. With a quick purchase, she left and went to Bob and Plo's shared quarters. She rang the doorbell.

Bob answered it. "Ahsoka! Hi! Did you get my text?"

Ahsoka grinned. "Yep. I got you some dates." She held up a basket of fruit. All dates.

Bob looked confused. "Dates, haha that's not exactly what I meant." He laughed a little.

She kept smiling. "I know. But it's funny right?"

"Uh huh." He laughed again.

"We can do something tomorrow if you want."

Bob smiled broadly, very happy. "Perfect. Any ideas?"

"Anything's fine." Ahsoka smiled back.

"Ok, I'll pick you up tomorrow, say around 6?"

"Sounds good. Guess it's a date." She tossed him a date fruit and walked next door to her and Anakin's quarters.

And Bob kept on smiling.

Ahsoka set the basket of extra date fruits down on the counter. "Anakin, I bought some dates."

"Bought? Dates? Snippies, dates are not something you can buy- sure they aren't free but you can't _buy _them," Anakin said, now frosting his cookies.

"Says the man who lets people _win_ them?" Ahsoka countered, then just shrugged. "But anyway, I meant date fruits. Look."

Anakin dropped everything out of sheer curiosity and came over to the basket. "…It looks disgusting."

"Try one."

"Nu-uh. They look like wrinkly bruised almonds." Anakin crossed his arms and refused to even look at them again.

"They're actually really sweet. I think you'd like them," Ahsoka said to him. She took one and ate it herself.

Anakin wrinkled his nose a little, and dared to look at them. "They also look like dead beetles."

Ahsoka choked on her bite of date. "Not the image I needed, Anakin." She swallowed. "C'mon, try one, they're good."

"Noooo. No."

"Fine, more for me I guess," Ahsoka said with a shrug and took the basket with her as she walked away from the kitchen.

"Wait! I changed my mind!" Anakin ran after her. "Can I have one?"

Ahsoka raised an eyebrow and smirked playfully. "I dunno. Can you handle it? I'm having second thoughts."

"C'mon please! I really want one!"

"Hm… I don't think so. I never was _really_ fond of sharing anyway."

"Sn_iii_ps, please?" Anakin begged her.

"Well, _alright_." Ahsoka handed him a date.

"Yay! Thank you!" He took a bite and began chewing.

Ahsoka was grinning. "Reverse psychology. Works every time."

"This is amazing!" Anakin declared. "This is totes going on my next sandwich."

Ahsoka blinked, staring at him. "Did you just say 'totes'?"

"Yeah. It's short for 'totally'-"

Ahsoka cut him off. "I _know_ what it means. It just sounds super weird coming from you…"

"Totes." Anakin ate the rest of his date.

"Where are Tommy and Cherry anyway?" Ahsoka asked, looking around.

"Cherry's reading a book and Tommy's playing a card game by himself which seems pretty lonely."

"…Sorry I asked?"

"They're going on their very first Valentine's Date tomorrow!" Anakin squealed. "It's gonna be so cute!"

"Uh huh. Totes, right?" Ahsoka laughed.

Anakin grinned and took a handful of date fruits to go make a sandwich.

…

_February fourteenth, Valentine's Day- around lunch time._

Lux and Ian stood outside Anakin and Ahsoka's quarters, repeatedly knocking. They were both… shirtless… each armed with a guitar and wearing enough hair gel to practically make up for their lack of shirts.

Anakin opened the door. "AHHHH IT'S THE LIFE GUARDS! THEY FOUND OUT ABOUT MY MUSTARD!"

"What? Mustard?- no, no, we're here to ask the girls on Valentine's dates," said Ian, slicking his hair back.

Anakin wiped imaginary sweat off his brow. "Thank goodness! What happened to your shirts? I know times are tough, but…"

"Dude, we're _supposed_ to be shirtless. To impress the ladies?" Lux said, expecting him to understand.

"How would knowing that you don't own shirts impress them? That seems a little low," Anakin stated, looking down at his own tunic which had flour and frosting smears on it.

Ian was getting frustrated. "Just let us in to see them!"

"Sorry, no shirts no shoes no service!" Anakin closed the door.

"We have shoes!" Lux cried.

Anakin's muffled voice came from the other side of the door. "But you don't have shirts and you don't have service!"

"ALL WE WANT IS A DATE!" Ian shouted, fed up with all their failed attempts thus far.

"Patience, young one," said Lux, pushing him aside slightly.

"Young one?! I'm older than you! ! !"

Lux shushed him. "Ahsoka, Cherry, we are not asking much from you. Only just this one thing. All we want are dates."

The door opened again, and there stood Ahsoka and Cherry, with mischievous smirks pasted across their faces.

"Alright," they said in unison.

Lux couldn't believe his ears. "Did you hear that, Ian?! THEY SAID YE-"

Both Lux and Ian were suddenly bombarded in the face with-what else- dates. A bunch of them.

Ahsoka and Cherry high-fived and laughed hysterically. "There you go! Enjoy your DATES!" Ahsoka exclaimed through her laughter.

The door closed rather harshly, and the boys were left out in the hall, covered in sticky dates and bruises.

Lux peeled a date off his chest. "And now, I know how it feels, to get your heart broken." He collapsed on the floor.

Ian groaned in frustration and dragged Lux away across the floor.

…

_Around 6 later that night._

Bob arrived at the door, dressed nicely in black pants, a greenish shirt, and a blue tie. In his hand he held a bouquet of beautiful orange-red chrysanthemums. Ahsoka answered the door. She was dressed in a sparkling purple dress that came down a little past her knees and had sleeves that came almost to her elbows.

"Happy Valentine's Day," said Bob, handing her the flowers.

Ahsoka took them and felt a little place in her heart melt and she fell speechless for a moment. These orange chrysanthemums were the same type that Anakin had given her after the Nutcracker ballet- sold by 'the crazy flower man,' Bob's old master. She knew that it must have been difficult for him to pick these out for her. But the fact that he paid that much attention to detail in knowing that she liked these flowers, and didn't go with something cliché like roses (though there's nothing wrong with roses), showed how much he cared.

"Ahsoka? Are you alright?"

She looked up at him, smiling. "Yeah. Happy Valentine's Day, Bob." She threw her arms around him and hugged him.

Anakin walked over through the hall and went into the quarters, looking a bit excited. "Hi Ahsoka hi Bob!"

"Hi Master Skywalker," said Bob.

"You look excited," Ahsoka remarked.

"Well I just came back from spying on- I mean, documentarying, Cherry and Tommy's date, so now I get to come back and get ready to go on my date with Padme! Have a happy Hearts Day! I don't like 'Valentine's' Day anymore because I can't spell that. But Padme showed me how to spell hearts-"

"I hope you have fun," Ahsoka said with a laugh. "We'll be back later."

"Ok! Stay safe and don't run into any rhinoceroses!" Anakin said, waved at them, and went to get ready for his date.

Ahsoka shook her head, laughing quietly. "Let's go, Bob."

And they had a lovely Valentine's Day date.

**Thanks for reading! Also thanks to Count Mallet for the "date fruit" idea. (Hope you enjoyed my interpretation of it by the way!)**

**Stay tuned! Hopefully I should be writing more soon. :D**


	16. Fair and Square

**Hello loyal and patient readers! I am so terribly sorry it's been so many months since my last update! With the end of school, and then lots of writer's block, I've just either had no time or no desire to write until recently! But excuses aside, I am extremely sorry for the long wait. I hope this chapter is worth it! I hope to get more out soon. :)**

**Count Mallet asked "Did Ahsoka really warm up to Bob as someone she would casually date?" and NSNW FAN asked "Well, it looks like Ahsoka's accepting Bob? Whooda thunk!" Answer: Yup! We'll see how things turn out, but as of now, I think she's realized how harsh she had been.**

**Without any further ado, please enjoy this chapter, which is full of random stuff, parody items, and crossovers!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 16: Fair and Square**

It was around nine in the morning on a gorgeous almost-spring day. Anakin was making a nice breakfast for everyone, because he had plans to start spring cleaning early this year. He took out a box of frozen waffles, put it in the microwave, and when they were nice and hot he put a bunch of chopped date fruits and chocolate syrup on them. Then he took his little bell and rang it as loud as it would ring (which wasn't loud at all.) "BREAKFAST!" he shouted at the top of his lungs.

Obi-Wan burst through the front door in his pajamas and bunny slippers. "Where?!" he cried.

"Ohey Kenob's! You want some breakfast too? I made plenty." Anakin handed him a plate of soggy waffles.

"Oooooh!" Obi-Wan exclaimed. He took it and started gobbling it up. "Thanks, Anakin!"

"You're welcome!" Anakin went over to the other doors and knocked rapidly on each. "Ahsoka, Cherry, Tommy! Breakfast!"

Cherry came out rubbing her eyes. "What did you make this time…"

"Frozen waffles with date fruits and chocolate!"

Tommy peeked from behind his door. "There's no meat in date fruits, is there?"

"No, I don't think so," Anakin replied.

Tommy sighed in relief and came to the kitchen table, sitting next to Cherry.

Ahsoka came a moment later, for once not even carrying her phone. She'd been trying to find other things to do lately, which was very refreshing not only to her but also to everyone she interacted with.

"Ahsoka I made waffles with date fruits and chocolate!" Anakin announced, setting a plate in her place at the table. He gave plates to Tommy and Cherry as well, and also to himself.

Ahsoka looked at it. It didn't look _amazing_, but it sounded appetizing at least. "Cool I'll try it. Thanks."

Obi-Wan sat down in an extra chair, still eating like he hadn't eaten in weeks. "Anakin is there more?! This is so good!"

Anakin grinned. "Here ya go!" He gave Obi-Wan another plate.

"YIPPEE!"

Ahsoka took a bite. Though the waffles were soggy, it actually tasted pretty good. "Good job, Anakin. You made something good for once," she said with a laugh.

"Yay! Thanks Snips!" Anakin said, eating his own food.

Cherry and Tommy thought it was good too.

Ahsoka got up to get something to drink. She started making some instant coffee. "Anyone else want some coffee?"

"Snips, I don't think you should drink coffee," Anakin said to her.

"It's just one cup," Ahsoka assured him, pouring her mug full.

Anakin looked skeptical. "I dunno, you know how you get when you have coffee."

Ahsoka shrugged, added a spoonful of peanut butter to the coffee, mixed it in, and sat back down to continue eating.

Anakin decided that it would probably be ok, and went to get something for everyone else to drink.

Ahsoka finished her coffee in five seconds flat. "I'm supposed to be meeting Bob this morning, so I'll see you guys later!" She cleared her dishes and left through the front door.

Anakin grinned excitedly as she mentioned Bob. "She's so cuuuute isn't she! I've never ever ever seen her like this ever! I totally ship her and Bob!"

Obi-Wan pursed his lips and frowned, an obvious expression of total confusion. "Where did you ship her? Florrum?"

"Nuuu, I _ship_ them, because I totally love them together as a pairing! And- I bro-ship you and me, because I totally love us as bestest friends! Well, Ahsoka's my bestest friend too, so I bro-ship us too! Which is kinda awkward because she's not a bro," Anakin went on and on.

"Where did you hear of that concept?" Obi-Wan asked, still confused.

"Well, I made up this website, and a bunch of weird funny crazy people join it, and I love all of them because they're so much like me!" Anakin stuffed his face with more waffles.

"What's the website called?"

Anakin chewed his food and swallowed. "Well see now that's a really funny story! Because I was doing my laundry one day and I was looking at all those awesome settings, and my favorite one is 'Tumble Dry Low'. So I just put two and two together to make three, and voila! I called it DryLow." He grinned, rather proud of his website.

"I wanna join DryLow!" Obi-Wan exclaimed.

"I wouldn't," Anakin cautioned. "Remember how obsessed Ahsoka got with HeadNovel?"

Obi-Wan looked disappointed. "But I want to join DryLow and tell everyone that I ship me and my wifey."

"Don't worry, there's already a ton of people out there who do!" Anakin said excitedly, running over to the computer. He pulled up his page on DryLow, where he had endless pictures and memes reposted and shared. "See?"

"Oh I love that picture of us!" Obi-Wan squealed. "I'm gonna go make an account and post a picture from our wedding!" He ran out the door and all the way to his own quarters.

Anakin sighed. "He's gonna get addictedddd."

Cherry raised an eyebrow, and figuring that involvement in this conversation (or entire situation for that matter) was useless, she looked over at Tommy. "Want to go hang out in the park? It's a beautiful day."

Tommy nodded, finishing his breakfast. "But Cherry, not as beautiful as you are," he said quietly, smiling shyly.

Cherry blushed a little. "Thanks, Tommy." She turned back to Anakin, who was now frantically posting on DryLow for everyone to beware because Obi-Wan was joining. "Anakin, Tommy and I are going to the park."

"Ok ok have fun!" Anakin exclaimed hurriedly, fingers flying across the keyboard like hyper squirrels. "I'M BEING OVERRUN BY OBI-WAN FANGIRLS!"

"Just get off the computer and wait until he joins, then they'll harass him instead of you," Cherry suggested.

"IT'S ALREADY PULLED ME IN!"

Cherry rolled her eyes. "C'mon, Tommy." She took the hand of the squid boy and left with him through the front door.

Anakin watched them leave, pausing for a split second, and then turned back to his screen to find another five hundred and three comments and notifications. "WILL YOU PEOPLE FIND SOMETHING BETTER TO DO!" he wailed, typing like a maniac once more.

At last, he came across a post (and follow request) from Obi-DearKenob's. He sat in a silent, confused frown, wondering why in the galaxy he picked THAT for a username. After all, why pick something like that when you could have a username like his- AwesomeAnakin! But, to each his own. He watched in relief as his millions of followers began comment-spamming Obi-Wan instead. "YES, FINALLY!" he cried.

Then, suddenly, he began to lose followers by the thousands. Thousands of people un-followed Anakin so that they could follow Obi-Wan. "Hey!" Anakin exclaimed at his screen. "YOU CAN FOLLOW MORE THAN ONE PERSON AT ONCE YOU KNOW!"

But then he stopped and realized- you _can't_ follow more than one person at a time. That was specifically how he made the website so that you have to make a choice and only follow your favorite person, so that everyone would know that your choices are completely biased because you can only get one opinion. Utopia at its finest, yes?

Anakin glared angrily at the screen as Obi-Wan's number of followers quickly went from zero to two thousand, to thirty-nine thousand, to five hundred and forty-one thousand….. And his own followers went down, down, down.

Within a matter of seconds, Obi-Wan's followers exceeded his own. "THAT DOES IT," Anakin declared. "THIS MEANS WAR."

…

After spending the morning watching the younger Padawans practice for the spring ballet, Ahsoka and Bob headed to the cafeteria for lunch. With the noonday sun flooding through the large windows, and all the Jedi and Padawans talking and laughing and enjoying their lunches, it was quite a cheery sight. Smiling, Ahsoka and Bob got in line to order their food.

Suddenly, the cook burst out of the kitchen, a panicked look distorting his usually calm, collected face. "All of our regular food is gone!" he exclaimed.

Everyone gasped and began murmuring and whispering, creating a loud buzz throughout the cafeteria room.

"And it's all been replaced with-" the cook stopped to gulp, "Shili Cheese!"

Everyone gasped once again, in unison.

"Who would do this?!" a random Jedi exclaimed.

"I don't know," replied the cook, "but it's EVERYWHERE! A gigantic tub of it just exploded! We found some in the freezer, some in the pantry, some underneath the floor, some on the ceiling, and even some in the ice cream tubs!"

Two people fainted.

"I'm allergic to shili cheese!" cried a pink Twi-lek Jedi towards the back of the crowd.

"So am I!" cried another.

Soon, the entire cafeteria was in a ruckus, and the cook as well as the other cafeteria workers tried to calm them down.

Ahsoka turned to Bob, concerned for all the people. "Why would someone do this?" she asked.

"I don't know…" Bob replied, looking around at all the people.

The doors to the cafeteria suddenly burst open very loudly, and there in the doorway stood Mace Windu and Yoda. Everyone fell completely silent. Well, except for some random fuzzy blue thing in the corner which was oblivious to everything and happily eating a chocolate bar.

"What's going on here?!" Mace boomed, stepping into the room.

Yoda took another approach, and skipped into the kitchen to observe.

Mace face palmed and followed him.

Yoda looked around at all the shili cheese plastered to the walls and ceiling. He approached it, stuck his hand in it, and ate it off his hand. "AAGGHHH!" he choked, and fell backwards onto the ground, putting little X's over his eyes and holding up a wilted flower.

Mace face palmed again, then turned to the cook. "Shili cheese, mh?"

"I was here cooking, just like all the other workers were, and suddenly, that giant tub just exploded!" the cook told him.

Mace scraped a bit of the cheese up with his finger, sniffed it, and shuddered. "We'll take this investigation from here. Thank you for your cooperation." He walked past Yoda and kicked him in the side. "Get up!"

Yoda shrieked and jumped off the ground. He hit Mace with a corndog, and followed him out of the kitchen.

…

Anakin marched straight over to Obi-Wan's quarters and slammed on the door loudly and repeatedly. "OBI-WAN!"

Obi-Wan came to the door. "Anakin! Did you see? I joined and I already have a whole bunch of followers-"

"YOU'RE STEALING MY FOLLOWERS. THEREFORE, I DECLARE WAR ON YOU," Anakin shouted in his face.

Obi-Wan stared at him for a moment, looking about to cry. "FINE. WAR IT IS." He slammed the door, and huddled around his computer.

Anakin stormed home and did the same.

They both started protest after protest on how each is better than the other, and each started a separate website, HeadNovel account, and Holovid channel to promote their side of the war. It was all over the galaxy-wide web in a matter of moments, going viral the second the posts and videos were up for everyone to see.

The Coruscant local newspaper heard about it too. A journalist came into the editor's office with countless video references and emotional blog posts dedicated to this suddenly very important debate.

"Everyone is just eating this stuff up like toast made out of homemade bread smothered in spray cheese and covered in sparkles and pounds of butter!" exclaimed the journalist. "We should write a story about this!"

"Well, the story about the cat who wanted a cheeseburger has pretty much died out. Get me a rough draft on my desk in an hour, I'll have my secretary look over it," replied the editor.

"Why don't YOU read something for one?!" the secretary exclaimed.

"I can fire you at any time!" the editor reminded her.

The secretary groaned. "Fine. Lemme read it."

"It's not here yet. It'll be here in an hour."

"But you said-"

"I CAN FIRE YOU AT ANY TIME."

The secretary inwardly rolled her eyes and went back to whatever she had been doing.

…

The Jedi Council crammed into the back of a small motor home. Well, the Council minus Obi-Wan. He was too busy with the whole DryLow thing.

"Can someone PLEASE tell me why we're stuffed in this crime against fresh air?" Shaak Ti asked, uncomfortably close to Ki-Adi.

"Not safe, the Jedi Temple is," Yoda stated from where he was perched on top of a toaster. "A saboteur, in our midst, is."

"The kitchen has been practically bombed with Shili cheese."

"It's probably Shaak," said Ki-Adi. "She's the only one who's got a problem with the meeting."

"Hey!" Shaak exclaimed. "It's not my fault my personal space has been SEVERELY compromised."

"Before we make any precipitous assumptions," Mace began, "we need alibis for everyone." He turned to Shaak. "Where were you at approximately eleven fifty this morning?"

Shaak sighed. "Well… I was in my room, painting. With my pet walrus."

"….That's it?" Mace asked.

"Yep."

"So no witnesses to confirm…"

"My walrus is a witness! C'mon, you really think that I'd 'bomb' the kitchen with shili cheese?!"

"From your planet, it is," Yoda pointed out.

"For crying out loud," Shaak murmured. "Question everyone else too!"

"I think first, we should interrogate the walrus," Mace said.

Shaak put her hand to her forehead. "I give up."

Mace got up with Yoda to go to Shaak's quarters and… interrogate a walrus.

…

Meanwhile, Anakin sat at his computer with extremely loud dubstep music playing in the background, painting large signs and creating internet protests and petitions to get his side of the war on top.

"Obi-Wan does not. Stand. A. CHANCE!" he declared, smearing his paint-covered toothbrush across a sign that said "VOTE 4 ANAKIN."

He'd began planning hundreds of thousands of things within the past hour, including an epic show to raise money for the premium DryLow account he needed. However, at the moment, he realized that he wasn't going to be able to do this show on his own.

He grabbed his phone and quickly dialed Ahsoka's number. "Ahsoka! Ahsoka! Can you please do something in my epic show fundraiser tomorrow night?"

There was a pause on the other line. "Funny…" Ahsoka murmured, almost to herself. "Skyguy, Obi-Wan asked me to do something in a show he's putting on tomorrow night also. Is it the same show?"

Anakin nearly fainted. "WHAT?!" he screamed.

He could almost feel Ahsoka reel away from the phone. "What?" she asked.

"HOW DARE YOU AGREE TO BE IN OBI-WAN'S SHOW?!"

A five second silence. "Um, what? Why do you have a problem with that? I didn't exactly know you were going to have a show on the exact same night. Maybe you should just reschedule yours-"

"I WILL _NOT_ RESCHEDULE MINE! If you think that I will change anything just because of something OBI-WAN is doing, you are sorely mistaken, sister!" Anakin shouted, fuming his ridiculous rage.

"What is going on?" Ahsoka asked. "You need to calm down. Or lay off the unicorn jelly. Like seriously."

Anakin hung up without another word. "If Ahsoka's not on my side, then FINE." He dialed another number. "I know some people who will be."

…

Ahsoka stared at her phone in her hand, slowly lowering it away from her face. "What in the galaxy was that…"

"Mh?" Bob glanced over at her from where he was walking, several feet ahead. Ahsoka had been walking at the same pace as him, but had fallen back a bit to answer her call. "What was what?"

"Anakin just completely screamed at me for no reason," Ahsoka said, slipping her phone back into her pocket. "I get the feeling he's not on good terms with Obi-Wan at the moment." She chewed her lip a little. "Wonder what happened this time."

"Maybe Obi-Wan 'borrowed' some cookies again," Bob speculated, pausing to catch up with her.

"Heh," Ahsoka laughed a little. "Let's go ask Obi-Wan about it. Even in the midst of these things he seems to keep more levelheaded than Skyguy does."

"Good idea."

The two began to make their way towards Obi-Wan's quarters, when they suddenly ran into someone- a person that looked pixilated and block-y.

"Oh my gosh, I'm sorry!" Ahsoka exclaimed.

The block-y person rubbed their square head a little, and was about to reply, but suddenly, a small floating jar appeared and broke, exploding into a cloud of pixilated dust.

Ahsoka watched as the dust wafted through the corridor. "What is that…"

Bob coughed, then scrambled to cover his mouth and nose. "Don't- breathe!"

But it was too late. The world swirled before all three of them, right before going completely black.

Ahsoka was the first to wake up, feeling hot sun beat down on her skin, and seeing the bright blue sky above her. "Where am I…?"

The pixilated person stood over her and offered a square hand. "You're safe, don't worry."

Ahsoka jumped up and punched the person straight in the face. "What do you think you're doing, letting off your vials of who knows what in the middle of our hallway, and then we wake up and you're just all like 'you're safe'?!" Then, with a start, she noticed her hand. It had turned into a pixilated square just like the other mysterious character. "WHAT DID YOU DO." She grabbed her lightsaber, which looked pixilated and flat.

The block-y man held up his hands defensively. "Please, miss, let me explain!"

Ahsoka glared at him through square eyes. "Make it quick."

The pixel man let out a sigh of relief. "I let the bottle go on accident, miss. It's emergency teleportation dust that I use to get me home. It takes any other life forms along with me. I meant to throw it when I was alone, but when you bumped into me, I must have dropped it."

"Fair enough," Ahsoka stated, "who are you and, more importantly, where are we?"

"My name is Steve, and you're in Minecraft."

Ahsoka took the moment to gaze all around her in the bright, midday sun. Hills composed of blocks filled the horizons, trees dotting the landscapes. Pixilated animals -chickens, cows, pigs, sheep- scampered about through the trees, making little noises. The sun was a square, and high in the middle of the sky. It was moving quickly. "How do we return to where we were before we got here?"

"We're going to have to stumble upon something," replied Steve.

Ahsoka raised an eyebrow. "Implying…?"

"It was an accident that I made it to your world in the first place. I was off, miles and miles perhaps, from my spawn point, exploring a newfound cave. That's when I noticed a chest- a chest that shouldn't have been there at all. I opened it, and inside was an unknown gem I'd never seen before. A bright, blue gem. Nothing like a diamond, and quite the different shape than lapis. I turned to a piece of stone and tried to activate it, see if it did anything, and it set the piece of stone ablaze with blue flames." Steve paused to demonstrate, pulling out a sparkling blue gem and bumping it against a block of grass. The grass began to burn blue without being consumed.

"And the blue flame sent you here?" Ahsoka asked.

"Hold on, I'm not finished yet." Steve put the gem away again. "I stepped into the flame, trying to see if touching it would do anything. But nothing happened. I figured that it had to be used on something else. Perhaps in place of ordinary fire. I wandered into the cave just a few blocks more, and there in the middle of a large, cavernous room was a formation of obsidian. I recognized the placement. It was a Nether portal. Ordinarily, the portal would be ignited with a flame and would become a portal that would send you to another world, so I figured that maybe the blue gem had something to do with the portal. I ignited it, and a portal appeared, but not the normal kind. A different color, a different wave pattern; it was beautiful."

"And you went through," Ahsoka finished for him, piecing the scenario together. "So if we could find that portal…"

"You could go through, and you'd be home." Steve nodded. He glanced up as the sky began to turn pink. "We'd better get shelter. You don't wanna be out at night around here."

Ahsoka was about to nod her head, but was suddenly hit with realization. "Where's Bob?!"

Steve looked around, muttering something about teleportation coordinates. "The dust isn't designed to teleport all life forms around it, that's only a side effect. It's not always incredibly accurate." The sun was almost completely out of the sky by this point. "We need to get inside."

Ahsoka narrowed her eyes at him, and drew her lightsaber both as illumination and protection. "Think again, Pixel Boy." She dashed off into the sea of trees in the east.

"Miss! Wait!" Steve donned armor made of pure blue diamond and pulled out a glimmering diamond sword. "It's dangerous at night!" He ran after her.

She probably didn't even hear him. Bounding over hills and ducking under trees, she scanned the forest in search of Bob, trying to lock on to his Force signature. She caught a faint flicker of it for a moment, but then lost it again. "Bob where _are_ you?!"

The sound of footsteps sounded from not too far away from her, and her eyes were on the tree they came from instantly. "Show yourself!"

A pig wandered out from behind the tree and snorted a little. Ahsoka breathed a sigh of relief. But all too soon.

TSSS… BOOM!

The pig, as well as the tree and grass around it, exploded violently, leaving nothing but floating blocks and a piece of pork behind.

Ahsoka leaped back, and heard something else behind her. TSSS…

She jumped back again and this time managed to spot the explosive culprit. A creature tall, green, and pixilated, just like the rest of the world. The creepy eyes and angry mouth said it all; this guy meant trouble.

Ahsoka slashed her lightsaber at it, expecting it to drop dead, but it didn't die. She attempted to slash it again, but it only began to shake and hiss and she knew- it was about to blow.

TSSS…

Suddenly, an arrow zipped through the sky and hit the green creature in the head. It fell over sideways and disappeared, leaving behind glowing orbs and a pile of grey powder.

Ahsoka looked to the direction the arrow had come from. Steve stood several feet off with a bow.

"That was a creeper! They explode if you get too close but if you hit it and back up, you can usually survive it!" He ran over and began throwing floating pieces of iron armor to the ground. "Put this on. I can't get you diamond right now but I always carry back-up armor."

Ahsoka watched as she absorbed the armor and now had it to use. She began to put it on. "This is weird."

"You'll get used to it!" Steve dashed off forward, sniping another creeper that approached.

"Says you!" Ahsoka put the helmet on last. "You were probably born like this!"

"In a way," Steve replied. "Now get moving, creepers aren't the only things that prowl around at night."

Ahsoka watched the bars at the bottom of her vision. She hadn't noticed them before, but since they were now changing, she began to see them. There was a bar of hearts, a bar of… chicken maybe, she thought, and a bar of armor. The heart bar had slightly depleted after the run-in with the first creeper and now the armor bar had gone from zero to a little more than half. The food bar shook every once in a while, but was so far still full. "We need to find Bob, he's got no clue what any of these things are and aside from a lightsaber he's practically defenseless!"

"We'll find him, but we can't compromise our lives," Steve said, walking between two trees. "It will be safer to get to my shelter for the night, and look for him in the morning."

In one swift move, Ahsoka had Steve pressed up against the bark of a birch tree, and glared into his eyes with her lightsaber less than an inch from his neck. "You listen to me, Pixel Boy. It's taken me months to realize how much Bob means to me, and if you think I'm going to leave him out in the middle of an unknown world to die by the hands of merciless monsters, you are sorely mistaken. The only reason we need you at all is because you can find us that portal and help us home; other than that, I have no reason to keep you alive. Is that clear?"

Steve was almost trembling, something he didn't know he was capable of doing. "Yes, miss, that is clear."

Ahsoka drew away and turned off her lightsaber, realizing how cruel she had sounded but not really caring at the moment. "I need to figure out if the Force works here."

"What kind of Force?" Steve asked, stopping to slay a wandering zombie.

"_The_ Force." Ahsoka watched as several white, bony creatures armed with bows approached and began to fire at them. Closing her eyes and concentrating, she concentrated and sent out a circular blast that wiped out every skeleton, creeper, and even pig and chicken that were in the way. Steve remained intact.

"What was _that_?!" Steve exclaimed, staring with wide eyes.

"The Force." Ahsoka began to walk away.

Steve was still flabbergasted. "B-but, that's impossible! Nowhere in my records of enchantments and potions does it speak of this!"

"It's not from your universe, Pixel Boy. Now let's move." Ahsoka kept on walking and reaching out in the Force for Bob.

…

Mace and Yoda were getting absolutely nowhere in their interrogation and investigation. The walrus couldn't even _talk_, much less be of any actual help. The cook had found a note in the kitchen, but Ki-Adi's sheep had eaten up the evidence before they could get to it. They were going to question him, but it turned out that his sheep had been stolen from him earlier that morning with no evidence as to who took it, aside from the fact that the sheep had sticky purple goo caked into its fur in small patches. The investigating duo had no idea what to make of that.

"Do, what do we now?" Yoda asked, sitting on top of Mace's ceiling fan as it swirled around in dizzy revolutions.

"First, you can get down," Mace stated, yanking the chain that would turn off the fan, sending Yoda to the ground. He glanced at a website on his screen. "I think it's time we 'consult' an expert."

…

Twenty minutes later exactly, the door buzzer to Mace's quarters sounded, and he promptly got out of his chair to answer the door. Yoda looked up from his activity (which happened to be shaping corndogs out of cards.)

Mace opened the door to the two figures standing there. "Thank you so much for coming, this situation has completely baffled us. We don't exactly have any… _trustworthy_ investigators."

The first man, taller of the two, stepped in swiftly, his long coat trailing behind. "This better be good, I've got _so_ many other things I could be doing."

The second man watched him enter, and leaned closer to Mace. "Don't listen to him, he's been extremely bored. Our wall can hardly take any more."

"Shush," the taller man quieted him. He pulled off his scarf and tossed it to the nearest piece of furniture, which happened to be Mace's couch, and sat himself in the chair opposite it. "Tell me what's happened." His eyes rapidly scanned the room, as well as Mace, as if searching for something.

Mace nodded, and sat down on his couch, gesturing for the other man to sit as well.

He obeyed the gesture, suspiciously eyeing Yoda.

"Would you mind," Mace began, "telling me your names? The contact information I obtained didn't include them."

"We're trying to keep low key-" The shorter man started but was cut off by the other.

"We had to travel through a wormhole to get to a world that's not even heard of us yet somehow this man happens to have come across our contact information, which means he must be affiliated with someone who knows of us, and unless he has happened to spread this information everywhere which I know he has not because no one on the way here recognized us and if they were in possession of our information they would have stopped us or at least looked at us strangely but no one gave us a second thought. We're ghosts here, and after this we'll go back to our own universe and no one will know what's become of us."

Mace blinked, not expecting this. "So, you will tell us your names?"

"Sherlock Holmes. And my friend, Doctor John Watson."

**I've recently gotten into the BBC Sherlock fandom... I love that show so much LOL I just had to add them in. After all, if I could add the Doctor, why not them! ;)**

**I really do hope that the next chapter will be up SOON haha.**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter and don't forget to review! :D**


	17. Explosions, Dear Watson

**Well folks, after a much overdue writing spree, I present to you, the next chapter of A NSNW4! I had always assumed that school would actually prevent me from writing, but it turns out that I don't really have much of a writing class this year, which means that I need to get some writing practice somehow. Therefore, I'll be trying to write some things to keep my writing brain sharp. With persistence, this will mean that I'll be able to start uploading more regularly. :)**

**Also, for all you tumblr-ians, I've started a tumblr blog for all things fanfiction related. I'll keep you updated on current projects, future projects, and occasionally even my own illustrations/drawings of scenes from my fanfiction works, or fun facts. And especially for those of you not on facebook and therefore unable to keep up with things through my page that way, this will be your best bet for keeping updated. I'm unable to post links on this, but basically it's just bluesaber3 dot tumblr dot com. with actual periods instead of dots. Hope to see you there! :D**

**So without further ado, chapter 17!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 17: Explosions, Dear Watson.**

"_Sherlock Holmes. And my friend, Doctor John Watson."_

"Thank you," Mace stated, and then leaned back a little bit in his seat. "I'll get on to the situation. There's been an explosion at our cafeteria. We're unable to find any evidence, and the supposed note left at the scene was eaten by a stolen sheep."

Sherlock stared at him, with an expression that seemed to be between disbelief and disappointment. "Boring." He got off the chair and began to leave, grabbing his scarf and putting it back on.

"Wait! Please," Mace got up too and tried to go after him. "If we don't figure out who did this, it could cause division between some of the Jedi! I'll try and give you more information; there was purple stuff on the sheep-"

John got up as well. "Sherlock, we came all this way, we shouldn't just leave."

Sherlock rolled his eyes a bit. "I'll take a quick look at the crime scene. Bring me the sheep."

Yoda followed them as they left, now eating a corndog.

John glanced at him, then back to Mace. "What exactly is that thing?"

"The leader of the Jedi Order, I am," stated Yoda, a bit proudly.

"Just… ignore him," Mace said, beginning to walk towards the cafeteria.

"But _true_, it is, the leader, I am!" Yoda exclaimed, shoving the rest of the corndog into his mouth.

Mace took out his comlink and dialed Ki-Adi. "Ki-Adi, bring your sheep to the cafeteria. We've got an investigator here to check things out."

"Will do, be there shortly," Ki-Adi replied.

Sherlock spun around from where he was walking ahead of them and dashed to Mace, gripping the arm that held his comlink. "Is the purple substance still on the sheep?"

"Yes," Ki-Adi said.

"Good. I'll need to take a look at it. Is there anything else you know about this case?"

Mace yanked his arm away. "There will be plenty of time for questions once we get to the scene."

They were about to pass through the enlarged hallway were Kit would drive his tour bus through, when Mace stopped. "Everybody stop. Something's off."

John and Yoda stopped right away; Sherlock continued for a second longer before turning around, looking a little impatient.

"Kit always drives through here with his tour bus just about exactly this time every day," said Mace, looking around. The whole hallway was dead quiet.

Yoda sniffed the air. "Smell cake, I do."

Mace rolled his eyes. "Not now, Yoda-"

Suddenly, the floor shook viciously beneath them, and screams sounded further down the hallway.

Without waiting for prompting, Sherlock took off running in the direction the screams were coming from, eager to investigate firsthand.

Mace ran quickly after him, followed by John. Yoda kept up with them as best as he could, knowing that the smell of cake was coming from the same direction.

Sherlock knew what had happened before even reaching the scene, and skidded to a halt when he reached it.

Kit's tour bus was stalled in the middle of the hall, and cake was all over the walls, floor, ceiling, and bus itself. A cake explosion.

Pushing his way through the crowd of sticky people, Sherlock stood up on the edge of the bus. "Who is in charge of this tour?"

"Kit!" shouted several people, and several more gestured to Kit, who was over helping a couple children who had been pasted to the wall with frosting.

It was clear to Sherlock that this tour was a victim and not the cause. He also had another suspicion. He made his way back to Mace. "What exactly did you want me to call you?"

"Master Windu," Mace replied.

"Master Windu, what was the nature of the explosion in the cafeteria?"

"Shili cheese."

Sherlock put his hands together. "These explosions are linked." He got back up on the edge of the bus. "Has anyone found any sort of note?"

Everyone began to look around, and within a minute, A small paper note was found. The boy who found it handed it to Sherlock.

He looked over it. It said, _Inside_. "Inside…" he murmured to himself. "Windu, did anyone get a look at the first note before it was destroyed?"

"Not that I'm aware of. Perhaps if we-"

"Question the witnesses, my thoughts exactly, let's not waste any more time," Sherlock stated quickly, and continued walking in the direction that he knew they were going.

Mace's mouth hung open slightly for a moment, as if not knowing how to react.

"He does that a lot," John explained, "you get used to it." He followed after Sherlock.

With a shrug, Mace darted ahead to make sure the two didn't end up going the wrong way.

…

Under the ethereal clouds drifting through a sea of deep black, studded with twinkling stars, Ahsoka and Steve dashed through the trees, avoiding the creatures and monsters when they could, and fighting when they had to. From zombies to creepers to spiders to skeletons, they had come in contact and combat with just about every creature that could roam around at night.

Except for one.

Steve stopped dead in his tracks, staring off somewhere on the horizon. "Enderman."

"Where?" Ahsoka looked.

"No!" Steve jumped in front of her. "Don't look into his eyes. They can teleport. If you want to find your friend, a run-in with an Enderman is the last thing you want. Trust me."

Ahsoka tore her eyes away from the direction of the mysterious Enderman, still feeling the pull that intrigued her brain. Almost as if she _needed_ to fight it, like it was in her blood.

_The Jedi are peacekeepers, not warriors._

"If only that were entirely true," she mumbled to herself.

"Come again?" Steve asked, slaying a zombie to his left.

"Never mind," Ahsoka replied, and kept going. "We must have been walking for ages; how do you know we're going in the right direction?"

"I don't," Steve stated; "I'm guessing that he has to be somewhere in this forest, but there's no doubt that he awakened around the same time as you and I. If he's on the run from the creatures, he could be anywhere right now."

"If I could just manage to link our minds in the Force…" Ahsoka reached out again, reaching almost farther than she ever had, and sending out a message in the Force, _Bob, please, find us or let us find you. I know you're out there somewhere. You can't be dead, you just can't. _Answer_ me. I know we're far from home, but we will get back. Please answer me. I… I… _Her Force connection flickered out as churning emotions snuffed out her concentration to the Force. "I love you," she whispered.

"Love me?" Steve asked. "I know I'm helping you and all, but that seems a little extreme, don't you think?"

"Shut up, I don't mean you." Ahsoka looked around. "Bob, where ARE you?"

…

Anakin had spent the past several hours calling up everyone he knew who would join his side of the war. Ki-Adi was the first one there, after dropping off his sheep somewhere apparently, and Padme was there soon after. Within the next few minutes, a group of many other random people had shown up, after reading the "come support Anakin!" post on his website.

"We're just waiting for one more person," Anakin said, tapping a pointy stick that he planned to use during his presentation against his hand.

A familiar whizzing and whirling noise began to sound. The room became very windy.

"There he is now!"

Within the next several seconds, the TARDIS had materialized at the back of the room. The Doctor stepped out of the door and spun around a little. "Somebody call for a doctor?" he asked with a grin.

"Doctor!" Anakin exclaimed, clapping his hands. "I'm so glad you chose my side!"

"Chose your side?" the Doctor inquired, beginning to examine things in the room. He wandered to the kitchen and started eating some of the dates left on the counter.

"Yeah, side Anakin in the popularity war! Obi-Wan thinks he can just come on in and steal all my followers! But we're here to show him that he can't!" Anakin exclaimed.

Several enthusiasts in the crowd cheered.

The Doctor's mouth straightened a bit. "You called me to be part of a war?" He frowned slightly. "I try not to get involved in wars…"

"It's a popularity war, Doctor, it's not like we're shooting people," Anakin said with an expression that said '_duh._'

"Oh, well, alright then, I suppose," said the Doctor, and he settled in with the crowd to listen to whatever Anakin had to say.

Anakin quickly adjusted his items on stage and got his pointy stick. "Alright everyone. As you all are aware, I have gathered you here today because we are in the midst of the popularity war of the century. ANAKIN SKYWALKER VERSUS OBI-WAN KENOBI!" He paused as several people cheered and clapped, sending the whole crowd into a riot. "I have several plans to get back the majority, if not _all_ of my followers on DryLow. I trust that all of you will do whatever you can to move our efforts along."

…

Sherlock reached the cafeteria a bit ahead of the others, and used the precious seconds alone to observe as much as he could. His mind hurriedly buzzed with ideas as to how this could have been done.

About half a minute later, John and Mace arrived. John was panting slightly. "You could wait up once in a while, Sherlock," he said.

"I think better when it's quiet," Sherlock replied, gathering evidence.

"Any ideas as to what could have happened here?" Mace asked.

"5, so far," Sherlock stated briefly, sniffing the shili cheese.

"Really?" Mace was astonished. "You've barely looked at it for a minute!"

Sherlock seemed to completely ignore him and continued to look around the kitchen. "We're dealing with serial explosions here, with this and then the cake. Without the note it'll be a bit more difficult to decipher the reason behind it, but what I can tell you is that the explosives artist is clever yet not intending to harm anyone."

"So it's a prank." Mace put his hand to his forehead and rubbed his nose. "Insolent Padawans…"

"Padawans, who is Padawans?" John asked.

"The students, John, they're the students," Sherlock said.

John blinked, sensing Sherlock thought once again that they all knew what was going on here.

"How did you know that? I haven't told you," Mace stated.

"So I'm right," Sherlock confirmed aloud. "If you're going to stand there goggling the entire time I'm investigating, I suggest you leave."

Mace seemed offended, but he did want to get to the bottom of this, and Yoda was certainly not capable. "Very well." He left the cafeteria.

John looked around at what he could. "You should really stop doing that to people, he could kick you out of here any time he wants."

"And yet he won't," said Sherlock, "his compliance attests to that. Same as anyone who calls." He picked up the things he had gathered, signaling that he was finished there. "They need me."

…

The dark sky began to blush tones of auburn as morning dawned, fading swiftly to pink-y salmon, then to pale blue. Zombies and skeletons began to burn in the broad daylight, and soon were no more.

Steve was struggling to keep up with Ahsoka. He called out to her in disjointed pants. "Ahsoka… you don't…have to walk…..so fast!"

"Bob is in danger, Pixel Boy," Ahsoka replied, raising her voice to call down to him from the top of the hill she was standing on. She waited rather impatiently for him to climb the hill after her. "I'm surprised you're not used to walking around like this."

"Well I am," Steve stated, "it's just been a while since I've made an all night trek through the forest, _and_ fought stuff. Normally I fight a bit and go back home to refuel. Only once in a while do I explore through the night."

"Mh." Ahsoka jumped to the top of a tree and scanned the area. A faint silhouette flickered in the distance, marred by dizzying waves of sunlight. "I see someone out there! Steve, is there anyone else around here?"

"Well, villagers, if we're near a village, but last time I was around this area, there wasn't one," Steve replied.

"It must be Bob!" Ahsoka exclaimed, and bounded off the tree and down the hill.

Steve heaved a breathless sigh and dashed after her.

Ahsoka ran with all the strength left in her. "Bob! Bob! ! !" she shouted repeatedly.

But the shady figure in the distance didn't seem to hear her cries, and if it did, it wasn't responding.

"Bob…?" Ahsoka questioned as she got closer. She stopped short at about fifty feet. Even with these different, blocky bodies, she would know Bob when she saw him. In fact… this looked almost more like Steve…

Steve caught up to Ahsoka, struggling to catch his breath. He look one look at the figure Ahsoka was staring at. "Oh…my…gosh…" he gasped, face paling, "Herobrine."

Ahsoka immediately picked up on the tone of his voice. "Who's…Herobrine…"

"_RUN!_" Steve screamed, his voice cracking from his dry throat.

Herobrine turned to face them, glowing white eyes glaring into their souls. He began to run after them, drawing a glowing diamond sword.

Ahsoka felt her heart leap and she took off dashing, Steve close behind her. "Where do we go?!" she exclaimed.

"_Anywhere_ but back towards him!" Steve replied. He grabbed Ahsoka's arm and pulled her sharply to the left. "Quick, into this cave!"

"Why is it always a cave!" Ahsoka pointedly noted.

"Shhh! Who cares?!"

The two of them dashed to hide behind a wall of stone, and held their breath as best they could despite their pounding hearts. What really was only a couple minutes felt like hours as they stood in utter silence.

Steve looked around after a while. "I think it's safe."

Suddenly, they heard muffled footsteps on the cave floor. Ahsoka sucked in her breath and grabbed her lightsaber, not yet igniting it. Steve drew his sword. A shadow appeared in one of the darkened cave corridors.

The shadow spoke. "Who's there…?"

Ahsoka's eyes widened. "Bob?!"

Sure enough, Bob stepped out into the larger area of the cave, the light from the entrance revealing it to be him.

"You're safe!" Ahsoka cried, and rushed up to him, embracing him as best she could with her angular Minecraftian arms. "You don't know how _worried _I was for you!"

Bob chuckled softly, revealing in sound how weary he was. "I was worried for you too. I thought I'd never find you." He glanced up at Steve, who had wandered over to them with a smile.

"So you're Bob. Your girlfriend had me running high and low across this place looking for you." Steve laughed a little.

Bob smiled. "Well I'm glad for that."

Ahsoka and Steve explained to him everything that was necessary to know, and told him about the cave that they needed to find. After a short break sitting on the cave floor and eating something, they set off to complete their quest.

…

Sherlock entered the room where Mace had brought the purple goo-covered sheep. He snapped a latex glove onto his wrist and approached the sheep to feel it. The sheep got startled and ran into the wall. He rolled his eyes. This was _way_ below the level of intelligence he was used to working with. At least the sheep couldn't speak. He walked over to where it was now and tried again to grab it. The sheep ran away again and crashed into the opposite wall. "Get back here, stupid animal!" he exclaimed and dashed after it. The sheep let out a startled bleat and trotted hurriedly away.

John entered the room just at the right moment to see Sherlock practically dolphin-dive after the sheep, missing by a hair and falling flat on his face. He was about to burst out laughing, but Sherlock scrambled up quickly.

"Close the door, John!" he cried.

But it was too late. The sheep barreled its way towards the door and crashed right into John, knocking him to the floor, and started running down the hall.

"Follow that sheep!" Sherlock shouted. He jumped over John and bolted after the animal.

Shocked, John got up quickly to follow Sherlock. He spotted shocked, or even people knocked to the ground, and broken items, as he ran, and apologized to those people since Sherlock clearly hadn't bothered.

The sheep ran all the way through the halls of the Jedi Temple, outside, and to the large farmer's market that was taking place that day. It started running under all of the tables, and Sherlock followed right behind it, crashing through the stands and thus dumping all the food that was on them onto the ground.

Many angry shouts called after Sherlock and the sheep, and soon it became a furious flock of fuming farmers rioting after the two. Sherlock was covered in everything from farm-grown blueberries and organic raw honey to maple-pecan pies and lavender scented candle wax. Needless to say, he was a mess. The sheep was no less.

At the very end of the farmer's market aisle, Ki-Adi sat peacefully at his corn chowder booth. He was looking down at his photo album that he had brought with him to work on during the off moments. But then he looked up, and of course saw the swarm of people all chasing after two goop-covered moving things.

The sheep bounded into Ki-Adi's lap and snuggled up there, content to finally be back with its owner. "What are you doing here-" Ki-Adi managed to say before he was flat out tackled by Sherlock.

And the mob.

So there they were. A jumble of people twisted and squished in a gigantic pile, in the middle of a totally crashed farmer's market. The police eventually showed up, peeling person after person off of each other, until the got to the heart of the pile (and the problem).

"What is the meaning of this?!" the officer barked.

Sherlock stood and tried to brush himself off but only got his left hand stuck on his coat. "Uhh-" he struggled to grab something from inside his coat. "I'm with the police," he said, quickly flicking Lestrade's police badge in their faces and putting it away. He sometimes managed to acquire things like that in case of emergencies. "Just chasing after this runaway sheep. Here on business."

"Which division?" the officer asked.

"Probably not yours." Sherlock yanked his hand off his coat and approached the sheep again. "That sheep is carrying vital evidence, I'll need to take it from you."

Ki-Adi stroked his filthy sheep. "Well why are you using those gloves, then! My sheep is terribly afraid of latex."

"Is that _it_?!" Sherlock face palmed, but then got his hand stuck on his face. "Urrghhh-" He pulled on it harshly to remove it and peeled off the gloves, then grabbed the sheep and dragged it back to the Jedi Temple where he could examine it.

…

If you've been wondering where our duo of comical would-be-stalkers, Ian and Lux, have been, I'll tell you. After the whole Valentine's Day incident with the dates (and without the shirts), Ahsoka, Cherry, and Anakin had agreed that they need a bit of supervision. After three hundred and sixty seconds of thinking, Anakin decided to hire Montana to spy on them. If they get within two hundred feet of Anakin and Ahsoka's shared quarters, Montana takes them to Bob and Plo's quarters and makes them play Candy Land for two hours. As if that wasn't enough torture for the two jocks, Anakin also insisted that they listened to a toddler sing-a-long video while the played the game.

Ian and Lux absolutely hated it, but it didn't really stop them from still trying; they still approached about four or five times a week, if not more. If insanity truly is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result, those two boys would be the picture in the dictionary.

Today was one of those days. Dressed as door-to-door salesmen, Ian and Lux approached the front door of the quarters in question. They were about halfway through the two hundred feet barrier when Montana dropped from an air vent in the ceiling.

Lux screamed at the top of his lungs like a traumatized goat. Ian slapped him hard across the face. He cleared his throat and tried his best gruff, masculine voice to disguise himself. "Excuse my, er, friend, madam, we're just on our way to solicit some strangers. And by that I mean sell cookies."

Now Lux jabbed Ian in the chest. "_Cookies aren't manly_," he hissed through clenched teeth, trying not to let Montana hear him. He straightened up and put on a cheesy smile.

Ian gingerly rubbed his ribcage. "Did I say cookies? I meant… books! We're selling… gun magazines…?"

Montana was accustomed to suspecting anyone who walked down the hallway to be Ian and Lux (which annoyed the heck out of everyone else), so it was pretty easy for her to figure out it was them, but she decided to humor them a bit. "Oh thank goodness y'all are here, I've been lookin' fur someone to sell me the next copy of _Rednecks and Their Shotguns_, but no one ever seems to pass by here! Follow me," she said and practically pushed them all the way to Bob and Plo's quarters.

"We've, uh, got a determined route, miss, so we can't really stop here first," Ian said, thinking that Montana had not suspected them.

"Nonsense! You telemarketers ain't gonna pass up a chance to sell, are ya?" Montana opened the door and practically shoved them in. Plo and Bob were not home today(quite obviously, if you've been paying _any_ attention), so she had full reign of the place.

"Ummm don't telemarketers sell by telephone?" Lux asked.

"Yer newfangled terminology ain't got nothin' on my dialect," Montana stated, and made them sit down on the couch. "Now shut yer mouths and play Candy Land."

"WHAT?!" Lux shrieked, his fake goatee falling off.

"You heard me, boys. Y'all can't fool my skills in findin' ya out." She tossed the game board at them and locked the door.

"This is ridiculous!" Ian exclaimed. "Why are you even doing this? What do you have against us?! And why would you do this for Anakin! Is he paying you or something?"

"I'm protectin' Ahsoka and Cherry cuz y'all are mighty persistent- in a bad way," Montana replied, "and yes, Anakin gives me packages of toothpicks in return for my service."

Lux and Ian burst out laughing. "What do you do with them?" Ian asked, still snickering.

Montana pulled out a castle the size of a shoebox made entirely of toothpicks and glue.

The boys just laughed harder. "No wonder you do this!" Ian choked through his laughter. "Do you even have any friends?"

Glaring through a frown, Montana crossed her arms. "_Duh_, I've got Anakin, Ahsoka, Cherry, Tommy, my cousin Bob-"

Lux was still laughing too. "Is that it? What about _normal_ friends? You can't survive long surrounded by freaks."

Montana's face began to flush red, though neither she nor the boys were sure if it was from building frustration or embarrassment. "I don't NEED '_normal_' friends, and if you want to keep _making fun of them_, I can have you _on the floor out COLD_ in FIVE. SECONDS. FLAT."

Ian got up and spread his arms out a little. "Oh, you wanna go?"

Montana gritted her teeth. "Gladly."

Suddenly, the door opened and Plo walked in quizzically, as if looking for something. "Oh, sorry Monty," he said as he closed the door behind him, "hope I'm not interrupting."

Lux snorted. "'Monty'?" He and Ian laughed some more.

Montana glared daggers at him. "These two _gentlemen_ have been sentenced to two hours of Candy Land playin' and sing-a-long listenin', and they're bein' _very_ disagreeable about it." Her face was still flushed bright in her cheeks.

"I'll take care of that if you help me look for Bob," Plo said, shifting his weight a bit uneasily.

All the agitated red drained from Montana's face, rendering her cheeks almost pale. "Whaddya mean, look for Bob?"

"He won't answer his phone and I can't find him anywhere. He was supposed to be with Ahsoka today, but she won't answer her phone either, and she _always_ has her phone," Plo said.

"What makes ya think he's in danger?" Montana asked.

"I don't know, but I haven't felt his presence near in a while… and with all those strange explosions going off lately… and the fact that he told me he was at the scene of the shili cheese one…" Plo glulped. "OKAY I'M AFRAID THAT HE WAS CAPTURED BY SERIAL BOMBERS AND THEY'RE GOING TO FORCE FEED LUCKY CHARMS TO HIM UNTIL HE TELLS THEM THE LOCATION OF THE GOLDEN VIDEO CHIP!"

"Oh my gosh!" Montana cried. "I'll find him, Plo, I promise!" She lay a hand across her heart and held up her other hand as a signal of oath.

Ian snorted. "You don't believe that actually happened, do you?"

Lux twisted a piece of his shirt with his finger. "You never know, Ian, I've heard a lot about serial bombers… never let them near your Cheerios…"

Ian rolled his eyes.

Montana dashed out the door on a quest to find Bob, and Plo stayed behind. "Now boys, play your games or I shall have to use the Force."

"Mehhhh," Ian whined, but complied and drew the first card of the game. "By the way, _I'm_ going to be red this time."

"Noooo! I always be red!" Lux exclaimed.

"EXACTLY, it's my turn!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"For Pete's sake, children," Plo said, calmly but in a raised voice.

"I don't know anyone named Pete," Lux informed him. "Therefore I have no obligations to tend to his steak."

Ian face palmed. "Do you have a hearing problem or something?"

"My grandmother is fine, but thanks for asking," Lux drew a card and moved the green piece.

Ian rolled his eyes once again and continued in their long, torturous game.

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please don't forget to review, and check out my tumblr! Reviews and followers make me so very happy :)**

**And _hopefully_ (key word, "hopefully") I should be getting up another chapter somewhere between this week and next week. Stay tuned!**


	18. Not Your First Rodeo

**LOOK AT ME AND HOW EFFICIENT I AM! I ACTUALLY GOT ANOTHER CHAPTER UP AT A DECENT TIME!**

**Well, folks! We are approaching the _3 Year Anniversary_ of the A Not-So-Normal Week series! And I want your help with it! If you haven't been on Facebook or Tumblr lately, you probably haven't seen my posts; but I want your input! Any idea, any character, any scenario, any plot twist, and I will try to use it! Granted I may not be able to do all of them (or it doesn't fit in with my overall plan), but odds are that I'll be able to use pretty much all your ideas! So review 'em, facebook 'em, tumblr ask 'em, private message 'em, anything! Let's make this anniversary memorable- for all of us!**

**The special anniversary chapter will be posted on the actual anniversary date: September 27. So please check back on that day to read it! :D**

**Without further ado, chapter 18!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 18: Not Your First Rodeo**

"So what did you do all by yourself in the past night?" Ahsoka asked Bob as they exited the cave.

"I gathered some supplies and built a little shelter for myself," Bob replied. "I had been doing a little bit of mining when you guys found me, but my pick broke."

Steve raised an eyebrow. "So you know how things roll in Minecraft, then?"

"Oh yeah, totally, I play all the time at home." Bob smiled. "Want to see what I built?"

"Sure," Steve said. He inwardly laughed as he imagined a tiny shack made of oak wood planks, cobble, and dirt.

"Alright, cool, it's around the mountain this way," Bob said.

The trio wandered along the edge of the mountain to a large open field.

"Tada!"

A humungous castle stood smack in the middle of the open field, made entirely out of diamond blocks studded with blocks of emerald, lapis, and gold. Imitation flags made of bright green wool sat atop the turrets, appearing to wave in the breeze.

Steve's jaw dropped violently to the ground. "What the- how did- WHAT?"

"You like it?" Bob asked, pressing a lever hidden in a tree to open the piston-controlled door.

"HOW THE HECK." Steve could not compute.

"A little mining and exploring was all it took," Bob said modestly, and led them inside.

Steve attempted to get it back together and glanced around with as controlled of a look as he could. "Ahem- not bad, I mean, it's good for your first night." He quickly lost that facade. "How in MINECRAFT did you get this many diamonds in one night?!"

"Blood, sweat, and tears," Bob said with a shrug. Ahsoka looked at him sympathetically.

Steve was flabbergasted. "Them hacks, bro…"

It was Bob's turn to look shocked.

"Oh no he didn't," Ahsoka said.

"Look," said Bob, "it doesn't really matter. We're all together now, we're safe, so we can find our way out of here and it'll all be over. You can keep the castle, Steve."

"No way… thanks, bro. Wow." Steve opened one of the chests. "YOU FOUGHT ENDERMEN?!"

"Like I said, this isn't my first rodeo," Bob stated, then cringed. "Don't let Montana know I used that expression, she'll never let me hear the end of it…"

Ahsoka laughed. "Your secret is safe with me."

…

"How do you know where to look for Bob, Montana?" Cherry asked as she and Tommy followed Montana through the halls of the Jedi Temple.

"This ain't my first rodeo," Montana quipped, spying around the walls with a giant magnifying glass, "he'll turn up if we just look in places we know he could be and don't look in places we know he ain't."

"Okay…"

Suddenly, Montana crashed straight into Sherlock, who was carrying the sheep. The sheep stuck to her on account of the goop. "Oh my gawsh! I'm so sorry," she said, peeling off the sheep and handing it to him.

"Watch where you're going," Sherlock said rather coldly. He took a quick look at Montana and began to deduce her. "Cousin or acquaintance."

"Come again?" Montana looked at him through her magnifying glass which made her eyes look extra large.

"You're searching for someone, clearly you're not incredibly traumatized; rules out boyfriend, siblings, close friends, probably even parents; but you're not professional so clearly you're doing this on a favor or your own will. Thus, cousin or acquaintance?" Sherlock seemed unfazed by his deduction though eager to see if he was right.

"Yer mighty clever; it's ma cousin. Say, you could help look fur him, seein' as yer a fancy inv_e_stigater or something'," Montana pointed out.

"Excellent deduction, though I prefer the term 'consulting detective,'" Sherlock stated. "I'm on business. Good day." He walked away with the sheep.

Montana shrugged. "Good luck!"

"I don't have luck! I succeed by my knowledge and facts alone!" Sherlock continued walking away with the sheep.

Montana shrugged a second time and kept on spying with her magnifying glass. "Okay," she said to Cherry and Tommy, "what do we know is that he's with Ahsoka… and they ain't answerin' their phones…" She tapped her chin in thought. "I GOT IT!" she shouted, making Tommy jump. "We're obviously lookin' for an underground jail with no phone reception and a gang of cereal bombers like Master Plo said. I just don't see why people would want to bomb cereal…."

Tommy gulped. "This sounds really dangerous, Montana…" he said timidly.

"Nonsense!" Montana declared. "If Bob can get himself into something, we can get him out of it!"

"B-But… what if there's… scary guys with hats…" Tommy paled a bit at the thought.

Cherry took his hand. "If it gets bad, we can leave."

Montana pulled out a phone and tried to search the GPS for underground jails. She frowned as she became a bit frustrated with it. "It's not showing anything'."

"Let me see," Cherry said, taking it from her. Montana had typed in "where can I find an underground jail where cereal bombers are keeping my cousin?" Cherry face palmed. "That's not going to find it, Montana," she said. She went on an internet search and typed in "underground jails on Coruscant." Only one result popped up.

Montana took the phone back. "Mr. Jim's Underground Jail Theme Park?" she questioned aloud. Tommy and Cherry were about to state their opinions, but Montana interrupted. "PERFECT! C'mon y'all!"

"I have a bad feeling about this…" Tommy mumbled quietly.

…

Anakin had been planning this talent show for weeks. He had called all of his bestest friends (well, except for Obi-Wan, who was now his mortal enemy,) to come perform at this talent show. He didn't exactly trust some of the random freaks that showed up with pictures of him tattooed on their foreheads. A bit _too_ extreme.

He sat backstage with a clipboard and waited for his friends to arrive for their respective acts. The crowd gathered in the seats set up outside, anticipating the awesome show of their side of the popularity war. Anakin had specially planned for each of his friends to perform something completely dedicated to him and how awesome he was. He himself was dressed as a fluffy purple unicorn.

However, as the time passed, no one was showing up. Well, except for Padme and the Doctor. But everyone else he had invited, Ahsoka, Bob, Montana, Cherry, Tommy, Ki-Adi, Mace, Aayla, Yoda, Kit, Plo and the muffin man, were nowhere to be found. Anakin paced back and forth behind his sloppy cardboard stage. "I can't believe they're not showing up, Padme!" he exclaimed.

"I'm sure they've got good reasons…" Padme offered, though she wasn't particularly sure.

Anakin suddenly had a realization. "THEY DECIDED TO GO TO OBI-WAN'S SHOW INSTEAD OF MINE. TRAITORS!" His face turned red in anger.

"Ani, calm down, I'm sure that's not the case," Padme said, putting her hand on Anakin's unicorn-suit-clad arm.

"It's the ONLY explanation!" Anakin cried. "After all those years going to the Idiot's Convention with Kit! And my own PADAWAN for crying out loud! And my pets, and my neighbors too?!"

The Doctor tried to be reasonable. "Anakin, it's going to be okay. Maybe you should just go find Obi-Wan and make things right again."

"_WHAT_?! After he stole my followers and now my friends?! ABSOLUTELY NOT!" Anakin shouted. With a grim frown, he pulled it together and stood up, putting on his best smile, and went out on stage. "HELLO FOLLOWERS! Welcome to the talent show!" People clapped tremendously. "I'm afraid I have to announce that we don't have very many acts. But that means that you get to see more of me, and the Doctor!" The people cheered.

But as Anakin began his first act, he felt his growing animosity towards his former master, and now also his friends.

Meanwhile, Obi-Wan was having a similar problem. Unlike Anakin's cardboard wannabe stage, Obi-Wan had secured a spot in the auditorium, and bought fancy tea for everyone to drink and enjoy at the show. The only problem was that he barely had anyone show up for his acts either.

"Satine, how come nobody came to my show," he said sadly, glancing around the empty backstage room.

"I'm sure they have good reasons," said Satine.

Obi-Wan had the same realization also. "Oh my goodness! They must have gone to Anakin's show instead! How could they!" He began to cry, dripping hot tears all over his candy cane suit.

"The show must go on, Obi Dear," Satine said comfortingly.

"You're right, my dear. I shall do the show myself, the crowd shall love it." He stood up and dried his suit, then marched out on stage and began to recite poetry dedicated to candy canes, fairies, Santa, and wooden butterflies.

After the two talent shows were over, Padme decided that she needed to see if there was a way that she could get this feud to end. So she went to find Obi-Wan.

"Obi-Wan," she said, entering the backstage room of the auditorium. "How did this fight between you and Anakin start? It needs to stop…"

"I joined Anakin's website, DryLow, and people started following me. Some of Anakin's followers left him and followed me, so he got terribly angry. He even tried to give my computer a virus, and he _ate my chips_! He has turned himself against me. He's changed…"

Padme sighed. "Thank you. I'll try and talk to him."

So she went back to Anakin, who was still sulking about his show. He refused to take off the unicorn suit.

"There you are, Ani. I'm so worried about you. I talked to Obi-Wan. He told me terrible things."

"What things?" Anakin asked, turning to face her.

"He said… that you turned against him… that you… ate his chips…" Padme replied.

"Obi-Wan is trying to turn you against me," Anakin stated.

Padme took his hand. "Anakin, he cares about us. All I want is your love."

"Love won't save you, Padme. Only winning this popularity war can do that."

"But at what cost! You're a good person, don't do this," Padme said to him.

"I won't lose you to him the way I lost Ahsoka, and Cherry, Tommy, and the others. I am becoming more popular than any Jedi has ever dreamed of. And I'm doing it for you. To protect you," Anakin said. The tension in his voice rose with every word he spoke.

"Come on, Anakin, go apologize to him. Leave all this while you still can!"

"Don't you see?" Anakin asked her, "We don't have to be unknown anymore! I have brought peace to the internet! I am more popular than the Chancellor; I… I can get more followers than him! And together, you and I can rule the internet! Make things the way we want them to be!"

Padme backed away slightly. "I don't believe what I'm hearing! Obi-Wan was right, you've changed!"

"I don't want to hear any more about Obi-Wan! He has stolen my followers from me, don't you turn against me too!" Anakin exclaimed. He turned around and his unicorn suit tail knocked a lamp off a table.

"Anakin, you just broke my lamp! You're acting like a little child! You're going down a path I cannot follow!"

"Because of Obi-Wan?!"

"Because of what you've done. What you plan to do! Stop! Stop now… come back and right things! I love you!"

Anakin noticed Obi-Wan approaching in the background, wearing his candy cane suit. "Liar!"

Padme looked and saw Obi-Wan too. "No!"

"You've joined his side! You brought him here to humiliate me!"

"Come here, Anakin," Obi-Wan ordered, in a tone Anakin had not heard him use since he was a Padawan. He began to give him an disproving stare.

Anakin ignored him and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Anakin. COME. HERE."

With a very frustrated groan, Anakin stomped over to Obi-Wan and pouted. "You turned her against me!"

"You have done that yourself."

"I will not let you take her from me!"

Obi-Wan looked at him. "Your childishness and greed for popularity have already done that. You've allowed the internet to twist your mind, until now… until now you've become the very thing you promised me you'd never become when I let you on the internet for the first time."

"Don't lecture me Obi-Wan! I'm a big boy now! I see through your lies! I do not fear the internet as you do! I have brought peace, freedom, justice, and security to my internet!"

"_Your_ internet?" Obi-Wan exclaimed. "Anakin, this is ridiculous! You were supposed to make the internet be a fun, enjoyable place! Not a war ground! You're being an idiot!"

"I hate you!" Anakin shouted, and stomped his feet like a two year old having a tantrum.

"Anakin," Obi-Wan said softly. "You're my brother, Anakin. I love you. Please can we end this. I'm tired and I really want to go to the Idiot's Convention with you this year and beat you in the Cheese Up Your Nose contest." He stared at Anakin with pout-y eyes.

Anakin began to cry. "But you stole my friends! Not even Ahsoka showed up to my show!"

Obi-Wan frowned slightly. "None of the people I asked to be in my show showed up either. I thought you had stolen them."

Anakin shook his head. "But… if they didn't go to yours… Where are they?"

"I'm not sure, Anakin. But let's put this behind us. Friends?" Obi-Wan held out a hand for Anakin to shake.

Anakin thought for a moment. "No."

"What?" Obi-Wan exclaimed sadly.

"Not friends. Brothers." Anakin tackled Obi-Wan in an epic man-hug. Well… as manly of a hug that can be between a grown man dressed as a candy cane and a grown man dressed as a unicorn.

They then spun around in circles and did their secret brother handshake, which consisted of a fist-bump, a five second chicken dance outburst, three jumping jacks, and a double high-five. Padme watched and smiled.

"I'm so glad we're friends again," said Obi-Wan.

"Me too," Anakin agreed. "Hey you know what? I have an idea." He went to his computer and opened the options on DryLow. He turned on the option that allows users to follow more than one person on the site.

Immediately, Anakin's followers skyrocketed to five times the amount he had originally, and Obi-Wan's did even more so. Within the next minute, Anakin and Obi-Wan had exactly the same number of followers. The two men grinned widely at each other.

"But I still don't understand why none of our friends came to either of our shows," Anakin said, staring at the screen of his page.

"Maybe they just got so tired of your arguments that they went on strike," Padme suggested.

"I did that once," Anakin stated. "They closed down my favorite unicorn jam shop and I got very disappointed with them! So I went out in this very suit with a sign and a bottle of recycled pickle juice and declared, 'If you don't open this shop again, I shall dump this on you all!'"

"What happened next?!" Obi-Wan exclaimed, completely engrossed in the story.

"They grabbed the pickle juice jar and dumped it on me," Anakin recounted. "I found it so awesome that to this day I have not washed this suit."

Padme's eye twitched at that declaration, and she wiped her hands on her clothes.

"We should call our friends and find out what happened to them," Obi-Wan suggested.

"No, that's too mainstream," Anakin said, tapping his chin in thought. "I know! We can join the unicorn police force and find them in official unicorn police uniforms!"

"Unicorn uniform?" Obi-Wan asked, puzzled.

"Yes! We shall be unified unicorns in uniforms! And we can ride unicycles!" Anakin jumped up and down excitedly. "And since I'm going to decide everything we do and you guys can't do anything about it, we'll also be unilateral! And no one's ever done this! We're unique! We're unified, therefore a unit and unitarian! We're the Universal Unitarian Unit of Unique Unilateral Unified Unicorns in Uniforms riding Unicycles of the Univocal Universe." He looked as Padme and Obi-Wan stared at him. "I graduated from the Unit University."

"You never went to college," Padme reminded him.

"I didn't?!" Anakin cried.

Padme face palmed.

"Well I don't care. Let's go!" Anakin said, so he left with Obi-Wan (on a unicycle, dressed as unicorns,) to find the unicorn police force.

…

Following landmarks and paths that Steve had previously taken was the hardest part in locating the mountain which contained the portal. In general, he didn't tend to mark his way, as it was a waste of resources as long as you have a compass or map to get you home.

They soon came across a village on the biome edge between a desert and a forest. Villagers scurried around and communicated to each other in annoying grunts.

Steve approached one of the villagers. "Hi villager! My friends and I are on a journey, and we have no place to stay overnight. Would any of you mind lending us a place?"

The villager stared at him. "Well, you stole my wood. I looked everywhere for my wood, and I could not find it."

Steve sighed a bit, frustrated. "Dude, I was out of resources! Besides, can't you just, y'know, go out into the forest and get more wood?"

"But I want my wood. It's my wood," the villager replied.

"For crying out loud," Steve groaned. "Look… it's kind of important that we get to where we're going safely, and I am courteously asking you."

The villager looked at him. "One emerald."

"What?! Dude I'm not staying forever! Just for the night- You know what, fine; fine. We'll just go over there and build a shelter." Steve stormed off, back to Ahsoka and Bob. "Villagers are so annoying!"

"Let me handle this." Ahsoka walked over to the villager. "You _will_ let us stay the night."

Stunned, the villager looked around. "I will let you stay the night."

Ahsoka smiled, brushing her hands off as if to signify that she had done her job well. "Thank you." She waved the boys over. "Just a bit of persuasion."

Bob grinned, knowing what she had done, and Steve just stared. "Alright then."

So they set up some beds in one of the villager cottages and got in them, quickly changing the time from night to day, and moved on.

…

Montana, Cherry, and Tommy approached the entrance to Mr. Jim's Underground Jail Theme Park. Tommy was so terrified he was shaking, Cherry was a bit wary of the sketchy entrance, and Montana seemed to have no regard for the overall feeling of the place and marched straight in.

"Why does she have to be so brave!" Tommy quietly sobbed to Cherry.

Cherry patted his hand gently. "Hey, Montana? Are you really sure we should be going in here? It looks pretty ghetto…"

Montana came back out of the shadowed entrance. "Nonsense, c'mon in!" She went back in and approached the ticket counter.

The man dressed as a security officer was asleep, drooling on his computer's keyboard. He snored loudly and mumbled things about Danish fritters and island vacations.

Montana rapped loudly on the Plexiglas window. "HEY! Need to buy sum tickets?" she shouted.

Snorting as he woke up, the man violently sat up, spraying spit onto the window. "Huh? Huh?!"

"Tickets?" Montana said to him, putting some money in the little semicircle hole at the bottom of the window.

"Oh… umm…." the man stared at the money as if he didn't know what to do with it.

Montana figured he didn't speak Basic. "_Eye,_" she stressed, pointing to herself, "want… to, _buy_," she took the money and waved it at him, "_three_," she held up three fingers, "_tickets_," she pointed forcefully to the entrance of the park.

The man face palmed. "_Eye speek BASIC_."

"Well why didn't ya _say_ so?" Montana asked, shoving the money under the semicircle again.

Rolling his eyes, the man took the money and shoved three tickets back at her.

"Thank ya!" she took the tickets and went back to Tommy and Cherry. They were still at the entrance because Tommy refused to enter the shadows.

"C'mon y'all!" Montana handed them each a ticket, then grabbed both their arms and dragged them in.

Tommy panicked at her strong grip. "No! No! Let me go! Please! Please!" he continually cried, but his voice was so soft and timid that Montana could barely hear him.

"We're comin' for ya, Bobby!" Montana declared, and entered through the park gates with the other two.

The gates closed behind them with a loud click, sealing them in. Tommy had a panic attack and fainted. Montana didn't notice and kept dragging him.

"Montana! Stop!" Cherry cried, tending to Tommy as soon as the two of them had their arms dropped.

Montana turned around. "Oh my gawsh! I hope he's not dead! We need 'im for this!"

Cherry took Tommy's head, lifted it gently, and let it rest in her lap. "Tommy, it's going to be alright, it's a jail theme park, not a haunted house," she tried to assure him.

Tommy, waking up, looked at her. "But what about the criminals and stuff? And the," he gulped, '_cereal bombers_?!'"

Montana sighed a bit reluctantly. "Alright how's about this; y'all stay here, and I'll holler if I find 'nything."

"That sounds like a great idea," Cherry said, helping Tommy up. "We'll wait outside."

They walked back over to the entrance, but found it locked. Checking the map, they realized that the park _exit_ was all the way on the other side of the park.

"Great," Cherry mumbled. They went back to find Montana, but found that she had already taken off to start looking.

Tommy gulped. "Please don't leave me, Cherry, I don't want to be left alone in this place!"

"Don't worry, I won't. Let's start making our way towards the exit and hope we run into Montana, otherwise I don't know where we'll be if she needs us," Cherry said.

Montana was off in the first corner of the park, searching for Bob. She had no clue where the cereal bombers may be hiding him, so she decided to try every single ride, look behind every single food stand, search for trap doors, sneak into "employees only" doors, and do whatever she could to find her cousin.

The first ride she approached was called "Coaster of Death." "Must be intense," she murmured to herself as she climbed on. The ride attendant started up the roller coaster, and up, up, up it went- all the way up the terrifyingly high track. From that height, Montana could see everything in the park. It was strange, there was no one else at all in the park. Except for two people, actually, it looked like Tommy and Cherry. "Guess they decided to stay after all!" They appeared to look over at her, probably hearing the coaster being activated, and began to approach.

Suddenly, her heart dropped straight out of her chest as the car went over the top of the hill and plummeted down, practically perpendicular to the ground. She grabbed her hat with one hand and hung onto the seat. It took a lot to shake _her_ up, but she had to admit that this ride was _intense_. Her heart pounded frantically and her head spun from the g-forces, rendering her almost unable to perceive what was coming up ahead on the track, which was a drop. A literal drop. The car was about to come off the track and fall into a deep, dark, cavern in the ground.

Panic setting in, Montana knew she had to get out of that car, but the question was, _how_? Too shaken to think clearly, she let her instincts kick in, unclipped the unsuitable seatbelt, and jumped out the car. She attempted to land as best she could, but ended up crashing down and rolling across the ground.

Tommy and Cherry witnessed this, and ran over to her as fast as they could, worriedly.

"Montana!" Cherry cried.

Montana hurriedly jumped off the ground, not wanting them to see her. "I'm- fine-" She nearly keeled over, but Cherry grabbed her arm to steady her.

"_What_ was that?!" Cherry exclaimed, referring to Montana's coaster bail.

Montana brushed off her clothes with her free hand and glanced at her scraped and bleeding elbows, knees, and wrists. "Just- carryin' out the… investigatin'…"

"You may be outgoing and ambitious," Cherry said, "but I'm not going to let you kill yourself from carelessness. Tommy and I can't get out through the entrance and have to go through the entire park to get to the exit; so unless we all want to die here, I think we should stay together."

Montana nodded, a bit reluctantly. "Alright; y'all try the next ride-"

"Nu-uh, no more of the rides," Cherry stated. "Whoever created this park is obviously a psychopath with no obligations for safety; therefore we will not ride any more rides or eat any of the food."

"Well yer no fun," Montana said.

"Safety before fun," said Cherry.

"Fun before safety," Montana countered.

"Montana, no." Cherry's voice firmed up a bit.

"Cherry, please, I climbed trees before I could walk," Montana said.

"That's nice," Cherry said. "Why don't you tell me more about your childhood as we walk nicely on the ground."

Montana rolled her eyes a bit. She walked ahead and took her magnifying glass, searching each food booth.

After hours of searching, and finding nothing, they were pretty much left at a dead end.

"Maybe we need t'like, find the guy who owns this place," Montana suggested.

"Why didn't you suggest that originally…" Cherry murmured.

They approached a food booth. "'Scuze me? Who runs this here place?"

"The boss is always in the back," the guy replied. "But you're normally not allowed to see him."

"Well this here's urgent;" Montana said, "we've got reason t'believe y'all ar hidin' cereal bombers here."

"What?! That's crazy man! Go ahead, ask the boss!"

So the three went off to the employees only room and went into the back.

"Hellooooooo! Boss? Boss guy! Yoohoo!" Montana called. They walked around a corner and found a pool in a darkened room, lit up only by lights in the pool and a few small lights near the doors. "Hello?"

A man in a suit walked out from one of the doors.

"Jim Moriarty. Hi."

"Ah, Mr. Jim!" Montana exclaimed, walking straight over to him. "We've got reason to believe yer hidin' som cereal bombers in this here park, and they've got ma cousin."

"Oh dear, that _is_ tragic now, _isn't_ it," Jim said, hands in his pockets. "Unfortunately for you, that's not what I'm doing in this place. I'm here to find someone, and when the time is right, I'll be revealing myself to him. All the guys working for me here are idiots. So unless _you_ would like to help me with my plans, I'll have to kill you."

"WHAT?!" Tommy shrieked. His quiet voice reverberated against the pool and walls, making it seem like a shout.

"Not if I can handle it!" Montana exclaimed. She kicked Jim fiercely in the chest.

Jim was going to fight, but he fell onto a giant cupcake. A lovesick baboon showed up and carried him gleefully away.

Then a man with gigantic muscles showed up with a bunch of challah bread. Bluesaber3 showed up after him.

"GET UR CHALLAH OUTTA HEER!" she shouted, then left.

The Challah Man sadly departed.

Montana, Cherry, and Tommy stood, silently shocked, and wondering what to do next.

"Ah well," Montana said. "Let's go."

"Yesss!" Tommy cheered quietly, and they all left.

…

Anakin and Obi-Wan marched straight up to the Unicorn Police Station. "We would like to be on the police force! We need to find our friends and this is the only way to do it!"

"Sorry, you can't be on the force unless you're a legitimate unicorn," the police unicorn said.

Anakin started crying.

"I'm terribly sorry," the unicorn said.

"It is importunate that you grant us our request," said Obi-Wan, "we're in quite the predicament. And your imperviousness is not beneficial."

"Uhhhh I have no idea what the heck you just said," the unicorn told him, "and it's against our rules to admit any non-unicorn life form onto our force. But, we can help you."

"GREAT!" Anakin cried excitedly. He dragged the unicorns out of the station.

"WE CAN WALK."

"Okay!"

…

After another whole day of walking, getting lost, finding a creeper dungeon, and finding a bunch of useless rocks and a carrot, Steve, Ahsoka, and Bob finally approached the edge of a giant mountain.

"This is it. In this mountain is the portal," said Steve.

"I can't believe we've spent the past three days here," Ahsoka said.

"I know," Bob agreed.

"Thanks for all your help, Steve," Ahsoka told the Minecraft man.

"Don't thank me yet, we've gotta actually get to the portal and make sure it's gonna work."

"What?! You didn't mention that there was a possibility that we'd be stuck here forever!" Ahsoka cried.

"Relax! Only sometimes do portals crash…" Steve assured them.

Ahsoka looked worried. "Let's find it quickly."

The three ran into the cave, following Steve's torch makers all the way to a spacious cavern. And at the end of the cavern was the portal. There was nothing in the portal, just the frame.

"Is it broken…?" Ahsoka asked.

"I don't think so," Steve replied, finding the special gem in his inventory. He activated the portal. "I don't want to have this portal open anymore after you guys leave, so I'm going to give you this gem. Use it as a reminder of me, okay?"

"Thanks bro," Bob said, taking the gem. "And thanks for all your help. We couldn't have gotten back without you."

"Well, it is my fault that you're here at all, so it was my pleasure. Be well, alright?" Steve smiled at them.

"We'll never forget you," Ahsoka told him. "Bye!"

So Ahsoka and Bob stepped through the portal, engulfing themselves in the swirling waves. Steve waited until they fully disappeared, and the portal turned itself off, to destroy the frame.

Ahsoka and Bob appeared in a wardrobe as soon as the portal waves dissolved.

"Where are we…?" Ahsoka whispered.

"I don't know," Bob whispered back.

Opening the door, they stepped out and found that they were in Bob and Plo's quarters. Lux and Ian sat boredly on the floor playing Candy Land and Plo sat on the couch reading his tea magazines.

Ahsoka couldn't believe it. "Hi guys! Wow it feels like forever!"

"What the-?!" Ian exclaimed.

"BOB! ! ! ! !" Plo screamed. "You were here the whole time?!"

Ian glanced at them, then to the closet. "Sheesh guys, get a room."

"We weren't-" Ahsoka exclaimed, eyes widening.

"Oh I know exactly what you guys were doing," Plo said sternly. "YOU WENT TO NARNIA WITHOUT TELLING ME!"

"What! No!" Ahsoka said, but then realized he wasn't far off. "Well, actually, a portal was involved, but we weren't…"

"Keep telling yourself," Ian mumbled.

Then, Montana came through the door of the quarters with Cherry and Tommy. "BOBBY!" Montana cried, so relieved to see her cousin. "Where have you been we've been lookin' everywhere fur you! ! !" She rushed to him and squeezed him in a tight, Montana-signature hug.

"I'm fine, Monty; but more importantly, what happened to _you_?" Bob asked, taking her wrists gingerly in his hands and observing her scrapes.

"We were lookin' for ya and there was an incident with a rollercoaster," Montana said nonchalantly, as if nothing had happened at all.

Bob sighed. "I'm just glad we're all back together."

_Then_, Anakin came into the room with Obi-Wan and about twenty police unicorns. "Plo, we are here to find-" he noticed Bob, Ahsoka, Cherry, Tommy, and Montana right in the room, "oh. Uhhhh…"

The police unicorns all frowned at him. "Shaaaaaaame," neighed the leader. All the unicorns left.

"Where _were_ you guys?!" Anakin exclaimed to the group. "Our shows happened and none of you showed up to any of them!"

Ahsoka noticed that Anakin and Obi-Wan seemed to be getting along again, so she figured maybe it was for the better. "Well, Bob and I got stuck in Minecraft."

"You ditched me… FOR A VIDEO GAME?!" Anakin cried.

"No! It's complicated!" Ahsoka said, rolling her eyes.

"Cherry an Tommy an I were out lookin' fur Bob," Montana said.

"And I was here watching these two," Plo said, and Lux and Ian just sat humiliated that Ahsoka and Cherry had to see them playing.

"Well," Anakin said, "I guess it's okay. Obi-Wan and I set aside our problem, so now we're bestest bros again."

"That's great," Ahsoka said with a wide smile.

"So what now?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Has that whole shili cheese thing been sorted out?" Bob asked.

"No actually. They've got an investigator on it," Plo replied.

"Maybe we should go see if we can help him," Ahsoka suggested.

"Good idea."

So the group (except Lux and Ian, and Montana, who had to stay and watch them. And besides she really didn't care to run into the investigator again,) set out to see if they could help their investigating friend.

**And thus concludes chapter 18! I hope you enjoyed it! Please review, input some ideas, and SPREAD THE WORD! I'm really excited about this! :D See you September 17th! ~Bluey**


	19. Inevitable Investigations

**OH MY GOSH GUYS! ! ! I never expected to be on such a long hiatus! I am most utterly and utmostly and completely sorry! I know I promised you a special anniversary chapter and I totally fell flat on that. I can't believe it's been almost 5 months! D: Yikes!**

**Well, despite all of that, I have the next chapter for you! I do hope that it makes up for any disappointment you may have had during this excruciating wait. :)**

**I love you guys! Enjoy! Oh p.s. there's ANOTHER crossover in this chapter, so stay tuned! Maybe a little piece of my childhood will find a place in yours as well ;)**

**Without further ado... chapter 19!**

**A Not-So-Normal Week 4**

**Chapter 19: Inevitable Investigations**

Sherlock was doing some investigating with John, in the lovely quiet busyness of the Temple halls near a large window. At least, it was quiet until a crowd of people showed up.

"Ah, investigator!" Anakin exclaimed. "We're here to help!"

"Uhhh no. I don't want or need your help," Sherlock replied, annoyed.

"Yes you do!" Obi-Wan declared. "Anyone and everyone can always never not accept help!"

"…Huh?" John asked.

"YOU NEED US OKAY?!" Obi-Wan screamed. He blinked innocently and smiled happily. "What shall we do?"

Sherlock pretended to contemplate. "Well, for starters, you can leave."

Obi-Wan clapped his hands. "Oooh goodie! Yay!" He skipped away for a few feet, then stopped. "Wait."

"Don't stop! You're doing, erm, great." Sherlock assured him.

"Okay!" Obi-Wan skipped away completely.

"Well. That wasn't very nice," Ahsoka commented, approaching Sherlock to see what he was observing. There was a bit of the purple substance in the Petri dish under a microscope he had set up. "What exactly are you looking for?"

Sherlock gritted his teeth, not liking the extra "help." "In order to further investigate, I must identify this purple substance."

Ahsoka raised an eyebrow. "That's it? I know exactly what that stuff is."

"You… do?" Sherlock looked at her.

"Yeah. It's purple yogurt. The clones around here have practically gone on a crusade for it, they'll do anything for it." Her eyes widened. "You don't think…"

"THE CLONES HAVE BETRAYED THE REPUBLIC, I REPEATY, THE CLONES HAVE BETRAYED THE REPUBLIC!" Anakin wailed at the top of his lungs and started flailing around in circles.

"SHH!" Ahsoka hissed. "That's not what I was going to suggest!"

"Oh." Anakin hopped over to her and looked at her eagerly. "So what _were_ you going to suggest?!"

Ahsoka rolled her eyes. "Why would the clones leave such an obvious clue if it was them? I bet the real culprit hired the clones to help, and they left a little hint for us."

Sherlock looked at her, and John knew right away that this interesting orange girl was apparently right, and Sherlock was looking for a way to admit it in a way that didn't make him look like he wasn't clever enough to come up with that on his own, because he obviously would have.

"A fair attempt for an amateur," Sherlock remarked, "but unnecessary. The skin cells embedded in the substance have obvious signs of genetic tampering, so a cloned human being is the obvious answer."

Eyes narrowed slightly, Ahsoka raised an eyebrow. "Alright then. I suppose you know where to find them, huh?"

Sherlock was silent for a moment. "Nothing a little research can't remedy."

"No need. Follow me."

…

Obi-Wan was completely focused and determined on his task of leaving, and made it all the way outside the Jedi Temple. It ended there, however, because he noticed that people were putting up Christmas decorations on lampposts. And he knew what that meant.

"CAAAANNNDDDYYY CAAAANNNEEESSS!" he screamed at the absolute top of his lungs, causing several people around to ask him if he was okay. "I HAVE NEVER BEEN BETTER," he shouted at them loudly, and ran as fast as his legs could carry him all the way to the department store.

Merely ten minutes later, he was walking back, dragging a hundred bags of candy canes in a sack behind him.

"Santa!" a little boy exclaimed, seeing him. He ran over to Obi-Wan. "Oh Santa! Can I tell you what I want for Christmas?"

Obi-Wan knew far well enough that he wasn't Santa, but he didn't care. "Why certainly, small boy! Have a candy cane!"

"Yay!" The little boy skipped along at Obi-Wan's heels as he continued to walk, telling him all about what he wanted for Christmas. Nobody paid any mind that it wasn't even Thanksgiving yet, and soon, Obi-Wan was being followed by a huge crowd of children who all thought he was Santa.

Realizing that this was going to be difficult if he kept walking, he stopped at a park bench and slung the gigantic bag of candy canes behind him. He figured that he had absolutely plenty of candy canes, so in his early Christmas spirit, he gave a candy cane to every little boy and girl that hopped up on his lap. Twi-lek, Gungan, Human, Togruta, Nautolan, Zabrak, and every species in between, Obi-Wan wrote down every request on a random 50-foot scroll he found in his pocket.

…

Ahsoka, Sherlock, John, Anakin, and the rest of the gang approached the door to the place where all the clones lived.

"Clones! Please open the door!" Ahsoka said, knocking on the door.

Rex came to the door and opened it. "Oh yay! Come on in! We're preparing for the annual clone Thanksgiving celebration. We usually do it a bit early. That way we can spend Thanksgiving helping and serving people."

"That's great, Rex!" Ahsoka replied. "Would you happen to know anything about a purple sheep?"

Sherlock elbowed in at this point. "I'll handle it from here."

Ahsoka put her hands on her hips. "Let's see if you _can_."

"OOHH BURN. APPLY WAATER AND UNICORN JELLY TO BURN," Anakin shouted.

Ahsoka face palmed. "_Waater_?"

"Yes. It's better than regular water. It's waterier."

"Yes, yes, good;" Sherlock muttered, flitting his hands as if to shoo them off. "I didn't request your help, go mind your own business."

At that moment, Obi-Wan burst through the door with a group of cheering children. "Clonies! Santa's here to have you all tell me what you want for Christmas!"

All the clones immediately dropped whatever they were doing and broke out in an uproar of earsplitting cheers. Obi-Wan skipped over to a big fluffy seat and all the clones scrambled over to get in line.

Sherlock threw his arms up in frustration before coiling them back to cross over his chest. "_GREAT_. LET'S _ALL _GO TALK TO THE ATTENTION DEFICIT HYPERACTIVE MAN," he shouted sarcastically.

Tommy cowered. "Okay," he tried to obey, timidly wandering to the end of the line.

Cherry grabbed his arm and pulled him back. "Tommy, he was being sarcastic."

"…Oh…"

Anakin, however, didn't care one ounce about sarcasm. "I WAIT SO HARD FOR THIS EVERY YEAR. I WAS EXTRA SPECIALLY VERY GOOD THIS YEAR OBI-SANTA!" He ran straight to Obi-Wan without regards to the line.

"_HEY_!" hundreds of clones shouted.

Obi-Wan pointed to the back of the line. "Wait your turn, or it's the naughty list for you!"

Anakin pouted and sulked to the end of the line.

Ahsoka, ignoring Sherlock, stood just a bit off from where Obi-Wan was sitting, and every time a clone finished telling Obi-Wan what he wanted for Christmas, Ahsoka would casually ask him if he knew anything about a purple sheep.

Of course, that took FOREVER, so they were there all day and knew no more than when they had started.

"You know what we need?" Ahsoka thought aloud, beginning to pace back and forth in thought.

"For everyone to go away so I can go about my work?" Sherlock suggested.

"More help!" Ahsoka declared. "I'll call in the Sloth Minions."

"Sloth Minions?!" Sherlock shrieked. "WHAT NEXT."

John rolled his eyes. "Sherlock, just calm down."

Suddenly, a purplish portal appeared in the air about a foot off the ground.

"Wow, that was fast!" Ahsoka exclaimed, "normally Sloth Minions take _days_ to arrive."

"_DAYS?!_" Sherlock screamed.

However, Sloth Minions did not parade through the portal, instead, in jumped 3 kids and a bird-like thing.

"Never fear, the Didge is here!" exclaimed the bird, triumphantly.

"Whoa!" The three children breathed in unison at all that was around them.

Ahsoka wondered why they were so wowed by the surroundings, but then she realized that the room was filled with hundreds of parading clones, Obi-Wan pretending to be Santa, Anakin screaming about unicorns, Sherlock sulking in the corner, and so much other stuff. "Uhh… hi… what are you guys doing here? I thought you were the Sloth Minions."

"Sloth minions?" echoed an orange-haired boy, laughing.

"We're here because Motherboard sent us! We received a call for help." The girl with short, brown hair and glasses smiled. "I'm Inez. This is Matt," she gestured to the orange-haired boy, "Jackie," she motioned next to her African-American friend with her hair up in a bun, "and Digit," the bird-like creature grinned and tipped his hat.

Ahsoka shrugged, "the more the merrier, I guess. I'm Ahsoka. We're in the middle of solving an important case involving sheep and purple yogurt. Just don't let that guy know you're on board," she pointed to Sherlock. "His name's Sherlock and he's a bit grumpy that all of us want to help."

"Sherlock? As in, _Sherlock Holmes_?" Inez exclaimed. "Wow! ! !"

"No time to fangirl, Nezzie, we've got a case to solve!" said Matt, pumping his fist in the air.

"Don't call me Nezzie!" Inez crossed her arms over her chest. "What do you know so far?" she asked Ahsoka.

"Well," Ahsoka thought for a moment, "we know that there have been two separate explosions, one involving Shili cheese, and the other involving cake. We know that there have been notes left at both crime scenes, but one of them is missing and we think that Ki-Adi's sheep ate it. The sheep was covered in purple yogurt which belongs to the clones here, but we're pretty sure they didn't do it. Mace Windu and Yoda hired Sherlock to investigate, but apparently he's a little out of his element here in our universe, and as much as I can tell he won't admit it, he's gonna need backup on this one."

"That is one big mess of jumbled up information," Jackie stated. "Make room, I gotta pace."

"A calamity involving tomfoolery and shenanigans," Inez remarked. "Astonishing!"

"I gotta see what's holding up Anakin and everyone else," Ahsoka said to them. "Have a look around and let me know what you find. Do you have a comlink?"

"We've got these," Matt pulled out his Squak pad.

"Great," Ahsoka took it and punched a few buttons. "Now I can contact you, and you can contact me. Thanks for the help!" She walked off in search of Anakin.

"Cool," Matt said, grinning.

Sherlock watched all this chaos take place. "A disaster, John, it's a DISASTER. They hire me to help and look at these insolent life forms, tramping around here like they own the place!"

"Sherlock, they _do_ own the place. And relax, they know this place a lot better than you," John said.

"THEY CALLED FOR SLOTH MINIONS, JOHN. SLOTH MINIONS."

"Sherlock. Breathe."

"I CAN'T JOHN. I'VE BEEN DISRESPECTED BY _SLOTH MINIONS_."

John rolled his eyes. "Let's just go back to your research. Start with what we know, yeah?"

"Fine." Sherlock sulked out of the building and went back to his research.

…

Far above the skies of Coruscant, a mysterious ship lurked in the darkness. "Look at it, just look at it! Isn't it gorgeous. Beautiful, absolutely maaaarvelous!"

"What's so special about it, boss?" asked a robotic minion known as Delete.

"Yeah, what?" echoed Delete's fellow robotic minion Buzz.

"A whole planet to rule; a whole GALAXY! I don't know why I didn't think of this before! If I can't have Cyberspace, I'LL TAKE OVER ANOTHER UNIVERSE!"

Thus was the plannings of green, mean, chaos machine Hacker, the cyborg from Cyberspace.

"Oooh! That sounds like a great plan, boss!" Delete exclaimed. "Can I have a pet store on the planet?"

"Once we take over the galaxy, there will be whole planets to spare!" Hacker declared. "Let's get going."

…

Ahsoka, Anakin, and Obi-Wan walked through the halls of the Jedi Temple. Tommy, Cherry, and anyone else who had been there previously before the clone incident had gone their separate ways for the moment.

"How's the investigation going?" Obi-Wan asked, cheerily sucking on a candy cane.

"I think we're getting places," Ahsoka stated. "With Sherlock on the case, Sloth Minions on the way, and those kids helping out, this case should be solved in no time at all!"

"OH GOOD BECAUSE THIS IS GETTING BO-RING," Anakin shouted.

"Stop yelling! Go eat a unicorn or something!" Ahsoka exclaimed.

"OOOOOOOOOH GREAT IDEA SNIPPIES." Anakin skipped away.

"WAIT FOR ME, ANAKIN!" Obi-Wan cried, running after him. He choked on his candy cane. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHH DKJHA SDKSGA JSHD" He managed to swallow it and skipped away like nothing happened.

Ahsoka rolled her eyes and kept on walking.

…

In frantic attempts to prove that his expertise was superior to anyone and everyone, particularly Sloth Minions, Sherlock was scanning the hallways with his little magnifying glass. Up and down, left and right, and everywhere in between, his eye did not miss a speck of dust that floated by.

"There's got to be a pattern, John!" Sherlock exclaimed.

"I'm sure there is, Sherlock. Just keep looking."

With his eye on the glass and pointed at the ground, Sherlock kept walking, but not for long, because he crashed into someone, who was also carrying a magnifying glass.

It was Inez, and Matt and Jackie weren't far behind her. "Sherlock Holmes! Are you looking for clues?" she asked excitedly, clasping her magnifying glass tightly with both hands.

Sherlock rolled his eyes; another distraction was not what he needed. "Yes. Obviously."

"Cool! ! ! Can we help?" Inez asked.

"Everyone has done enough helping!" Sherlock shouted, and ran off as fast as he could.

Inez stared blankly. "Sorry…? Gosh."

As Sherlock was running away, Montana appeared, jogging right next to him. "FEELIN' THE BURN IN YER LEGS?" she called loudly, not paying any mind to the fact that Sherlock was less than 3 feet away. "SOOO GREAT T' GET YER HEART RATE UP WITH SOME CARDEEOH!"

Sherlock let out a frustrated groan and ran down another hallway.

All of a sudden, the ground shook horrendously, and a gigantic explosion of sticky, pink bubblegum trapped Sherlock and Montana to the wall. In less than a minute, John ran over, having heard the explosion, and the kids were not too far behind him.

"Sherlock! What happened?!" John exclaimed, running over to assist him.

"Our bomber has struck a third time, John," Sherlock said, slightly out of breath. "Nobody move! ! ! Look for a note! There's been a note the last two times!"

They all looked around, and soon spotted a blue paper hanging from a strand of sticky gum. Montana reached for it, but Sherlock yanked it away before she could reach it.

"What does it say?" Jackie asked.

"…Is. It says, 'is,'" Sherlock read aloud. "That doesn't help anything!"

"What did the first two notes say?" Inez asked.

"The first one hasn't been recovered," John said, "and the second one said… 'inside' I believe?"

"Yes; but it's irrelevant to you, go about your business," Sherlock said to them.

"We were sent to alleviate the conundrum," Inez stated, "the least you could do is accept our assistance."

Sherlock seemed to mull it over a bit. "Fine. Just _don't_ get in my way." He walked off to do some thinking.

"He's already been 'disrespected by Sloth Minions,'" John said, using his fingers to make air quotes.

Jackie had been pacing while this was taking place. "So we don't know the first note, the second note said 'inside,' and this note said 'is.' It seems like someone's trying to send a message, doesn't it?"

Matt slung his yoyo back and forth. "This explosion didn't harm anyone… it made a mess but no one got hurt. Were the others like that?"

"Yes," John said, thinking back.

"Why don't we just wait around until the next explosion? Maybe then the notes will make more sense," he said, pulling the yoyo to his hand.

"And risk making another huge mess? Ew!" Jackie cried. "There's got to be a way to predict when the explosion will happen, _stop it_, and recover the note before another hallway gets covered in goo."

"Sounds like a plan!" Inez agreed.

…

Hacker had been on the phone for hours, talking on and off to different people to see who he could get in touch with about taking over the galaxy. He was eventually directed to Darth Sidious himself. After conversing briefly, Hacker set up an appointment and headed his way. Within the hour, Hacker and his two henchmen arrived at the senate building and landed.

"ATTENTION, LIKE, DUUUUDE. LIKE, UNAUTHORIZED SHIP ENTERING LANDING BAY, DUUDEE!" a voice screamed over a loud speaker.

No more than a second later, however, the landing patrol was informed that this landing _was _authorized, so Hacker was allowed to land.

"What is the DEAL, thinking The Hacker cannot land wherever he should please!" Hacker bellowed to the clones guarding the landing bay.

"Standard procedure, dude! Want some purple yogurt?" asked one of the clones.

"No I would _not_ like 'purple yogurt,'" Hacker replied, rather disgusted.

"We'll have some!" Buzz cried, running over to the clone with the yogurt.

"Ooooh!" Delete stared at the delicious, shiny, gooey purple yogurt. He and Buzz devoured it, getting it all over themselves.

"Quit it, you dunce buckets! We're here on business," Hacker scolded them. The three were ushered inside by a sticky, yogurt-covered clone.

They stopped outside a door. "Chancellor Palpatine is inside, dude!"

"What? I'm not here to see-"

Palpatine stepped out of the door and shook Hacker's hand. "Welcome, welcome! Come in, please, have a seat." He turned to the clone. "Leave us."

The clone saluted, shouting, "dude, yes dude!" before running off. Strolling casually through the doorway, Palpatine closed and locked the door.

"What is the deal here?! I came to see _Darth Sidious_, not 'Chancellor Peachy Tea!'" Hacker exclaimed.

"Shush," Palpatine scolded him as he dimmed the window shades and turned on creepy, dim, blue lights. He made Hacker, Buzz, and Delete sit down. "I _am _Darth Sidious. I live an alternate life here; the whole _galaxy_ thinks I'm an innocent, generous chancellor. It's genius really."

"And they haven't figured you out yet?" Hacker assumed, rubbing his pointy chin in thought. "That _is_ genius; oh you are clever! Just the person I need to help me take over this galaxy!"

"Incorrect," Sidious declared, sitting down in his chair and pulling a hood over his head.

"What was that?" Hacker asked.

"I _said_, INCORRECT."

The chairs in which Hacker, Buzz, and Delete were sitting clamped cuffs over their wrists and ankles, locking them to the chair. "What are you _doing_?!" Hacker shouted. "Do you know who you are dealing with?! I am THE HACKER!"

Sidious grinned maliciously. "And I'm the most powerful Sith lord in all the universe. It is _I_ who needs assistance taking over the galaxy from _you_. I've sat here for too long. I've let them go about their ridiculous ways, even humored them in it. But now… the time has come!"

Hacker wasn't going to let this guy get away with using him, but decided to at least see what his ideas were. _If I can get away, I could use his plan if it's a good one,_ he thought. "What did you have in mind?"

Sidious's grin curved up more, and he actually looked excited now. "A slow and painful downward spiral involving a monopolization of all the sandwich shops in the galaxy! ! !"

"_What?!_ That's your plan?!" Hacker exclaimed.

"It will be _marvelous_!" Sidious assured him.

"Well what if I say no!" Hacker retorted.

"Oh you won't," Sidious smirked. He waved his hand in front of Hacker's face. "You _will _help me take over the galaxy with sandwich shops."

"Uh, no, I won't," Hacker said firmly.

"What!? That usually works!" Sidious whined, slouching in his chair. "C'mon, buddy… pal… just imagine us! Taking over the entire universe one overly priced sandwich at a time!" He jumped out of his chair, went over to Hacker and wrapped an arm around Hacker's shoulder while using his other hand to spread dramatically in envisioning. "I can see it now… Sidious and Hacker's Sandwiches!"

Hacker thought for a moment. "Make it Hacker and Sidious and we have a deal."

"Sidious and Hacker."

"Hacker and Sidious."

"_Sidious and Hacker_ or I don't let you leave!"

Hacker groaned. "Fine! As long as I get at least an equal share of the galaxy once we conquer it."

"Ehh… okay. Deal." Sidious shook hands with Hacker, and let him and his henchmen out of their restrictions.

"Hey!" Buzz piped up, "why don't we sell donuts at the sandwich shop too!"

"Yeah; and bunnies!" Delete exclaimed.

"Zip it!" Hacker shouted.

Sidious thought about it. "Those are absolutely amazing ideas! Just think! No one's ever done it before! Sidious and Hacker's Sandwiches, Donuts, and Bunnies!"

"WOOHOO!" Delete screamed.

"Yeah!" Buzz cheered.

So with a few extremely rapid phone calls that probably violated a couple real estate and building laws, the group of baddies had a riffraff of a store in the heart of the Coruscanti shopping scene.

"Attention, all!" Hacker shouted over a loudspeaker outside of the shop's doors. "Hacker and Sidious's Sandwiches… Donuts and Bunnies… is now opening!"

Sidious stomped outside and punched Hacker in the face. "IT'S SIDIOUS AND HACKER'S SANDWICHES, DONUTS, AND BUNNIES!"

Hacker sobbed and ran inside.

"Yeah we're just gonna cut this here rope now… with AN EVIL RED LIGHTSABER HAHHAAA!"

Several people screamed and two of them fainted.

Sidious smiled innocently. "Well we need to cut the rope… right, people? Heh… heh…" He sliced through the red ribbon with the lightsaber. "GO ON IN AND SPEND ALL YOUR MONEY!"

Crowds of people flocked into the doors. The shop instantly became a kerfuffle of crazy customers, belligerent bunnies, and daring donuts. The children all crowded around the gummy bear display, and demanded free samples.

"We do not give away 'free samples,'" Hacker told them sourly, using his fingers to make quotation marks.

But the kids screamed and shouted and cried, "FREE SAMPLES! FREE SAMPLES!"

Hacker hid behind a trash can lid. "Okay! Okay! ! ! You can have a sample! Just pay $7.99!"

"YAAAYYY!" the kids screamed.

Suddenly, Anakin burst in wearing a Batman suit. "BATMAN IS HERE GUYS! I AM THE SANDWICH EXPERT! And expert in bats."

"Tell me about bats!" exclaimed a small child.

"Okay, tiny citizen! Bats are very good for hitting people! It's not nice so don't be an angry bat kid!" Anakin grinned triumphantly.

The REAL Batman suddenly showed up. "I'm Batman- and I am here to have a donut."

"HEY!" Anakin shouted. "_I'm_ Batman!"

"Uhhh no. I'm Batman."

"Well, I've got a costume, and I know everything about bats," Anakin said, putting his hands on his hips.

"Don't get sassy on me, strange man. You know nothing about being Batman. Now step aside, I'm here for a donut," Batman pushed Anakin out of the way.

Anakin flailed his arms and tried to keep his balance after being pushed, but to his dismay, his attempts failed, and he crashed into a display of bunnies and was covered in little colored fluff balls. "Oh IT IS ON NOW, Bat Imposter!"

Batman was at the counter. "Yeah, I'll have a dark black chocolate donut and a cup of steaming black coffee."

Buzz skipped off to grab the donut and Sidious rang up the order. "That will be $46.99."

Batman tossed over a fifty. "Keep the change."

"Oooh! Our first tip!" Sidious exclaimed.

Batman took a tiny, dainty bite from the donut. He chewed slowly and methodically, and at last crinkled up his nose. "This… IS SPECTACULAR." He broke out in a glorious grin and devoured the rest of the donut.

Anakin ran up behind him, shouting barbarically, and whacked him on the head with a bat. "NOW WHO'S BATMAN?!"

Batman didn't even look fazed. "Still me."

"AAAAARRRRGGGHH!" Anakin screamed and continued to smack Batman with the bat.

"Stop this madness, sassy imposter man! I don't want to have to expend the full force of my abilities on you," Batman stated, nonchalantly glancing at his nails.

"Well I wouldn't mind expending my 'full force' on YOU!" Anakin exclaimed. He held up his bat. "See! I am BATMAN."

Batman stared at him. "Uhhhh… that's the wrong kind of bat."

"What?!" Anakin shrieked.

"You're talking about baseball bats. I'm talking about screechy flying black bats that fly in the night and are AWESOME," said Batman.

"In THAT case, we can both be Batmen because they're different bats! I'll cover the smacky ones, you cover the screechy vampirey ones!" Anakin said to him.

"Deal." Batman agreed, and he strolled epically out the door.

…

The kids and Sherlock had been thinking and investigating for the past hour or so. So far, all they had managed to do was make their way downtown in search of clues.

"Hey, you know what I just realized?" Inez thought aloud, walking past a corndog stand where Yoda was attempting to get as many corndog believers as he could.

"What?" Jackie asked.

"All the explosions have been made of food. Shili cheese-whatever that is,- cake, gum?" Inez counted them off on her fingers. "Three explosions in a row seems to be a consistent enough streak to be considered a pattern."

"Hm," Sherlock snorted, still obstinate to the kids' help.

"Nezzie's right," said Matt. "Haven't they also all occurred inside the Jedi Temple?"

"Yes," Inez confirmed, "and… lose the Nezzie."

"Sorry."

"Uhh, if all the explosions were in the Jedi Temple, why are we wandering around out here?" John asked.

"I… don't know," Jackie replied.

Inez turned around. "Let's go back before we're too late!"

Their attention was grabbed by a sudden outburst of cheering and shouting, and they all turned to see a stampede of people dashing towards one of the shops. Curious, and all silently wondering if the bomber had broke his pattern and blew something up in a shop, they all ran over as well.

However, it was no explosion, just a crowd of excited customers-to-be. At Sidious and Hacker's Sandwiches, Donuts, and Bunnies.

"What?!" Inez exclaimed.

"You don't think…?!" Jackie stared at the sign in shock.

Matt, being Matt, shoved both doors open at the same time and marched right in. The girls weren't far behind, and Sherlock, curious, followed as well with John.

The three kids trekked coldly through the crowds of screaming people, before finally reaching the counter where Hacker was bagging a tiny cucumber sandwich.

"HACKER!"

**Alright guys... who's with me? Huh? Huh? Who else loved Cyberchase? :D I still do actually... my sister and I had a marathon recently. To anyone who has no idea what just happened as far as Cyberchase goes... I apologize. XD Stay tuned! And please don't forget to review! I just adore reviews. :3 See you next chapter!**


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